Freezer Muyo! or Saiya-jins and Jurians Unite!  Why?
Because We Hate Freezer!

By Disgruntled Bubba

Bubba's Beef: an Author's Note
Alright, this is my very first attempt at a fanfic
that I'm actually going to finish.  I started one
before, but it just ran dry.  This is a Tenchi
Muyo/Dragonball Z crossover fanfic, so if you don't
like either of these series go away.  NOW!!  I mean
it!  Bugger off!!  Ok, good.  Now that all the losers
are gone the rest of us can get down to business.
This series will only vaguely resemble the Tenchi/DBZ
universes that we know and love, so the purpose of
this section is to establish the cannon fact for this
fanfic:
First major point of contention is this... the
Saiya-jin and Jurian Empire meet and hook up early in
the mix.  We're talkin REALLY early... as in back when
the Sai-jins had first gotten off of Vegetta and
started conquering early.
Second cannon fact is that, despite their alliance,
Saiya-jins and Jurians, especially those of the Jurian
royal family, do NOT get along.  In fact, due to their
conflicting personalities, they barely tolerate each
other.
Thirdly, I assume that Tenchi is Gohan's age, making
Noboyuki Goku's age, and Vegetta and Bulma only
slightly older than Nobuyuki.  This places Picallo
around Ryoko and Aeka's age, and Kami around
Kasuhito's age.  This is assuming that Saiya-jin have
a natural lifespan roughly equivilant to that of a
human.  It also assumes that Ryoko, Jurians and Nameks
have the centuries long natural life spans that
assumed correct by the fan masses.
Fourth, thankfully, there is only one Dragonball Z
universe to consider, so thats the one this roughly
follows.  Time wise, it begins before the Bardok movie
around the time when they WOULD have allied with
Freezer and King Cold.  The Tenchi universe is
substantially more complicated, so I'm using the
Tenchi Muyo! OVA continuity combined with some
elements of the Tenchi Universe series because I like
it that way.  Time wise it will start around the Time
Aeka's father takes the throne.
Fifth, if you like my fanfic, that rocks.  If you
don't, then that's your problem, because, quite
frankly I don't care if you don't like me or my
writing, it's no skin off my back.  If you don't like
my fic, but have intelligible constructive criticism,
then that's even groovier than if you like it.  I'd be
happy to hear good advice, but if you're some simple
minded baka that gets a rise off of flaming people for
no reason then open your ears an listen to what I want
you to do...  GO AWAY, NOW!!  I have no time for
stupid, poorly written e-mail telling me that you hate
me and you want me to die.  It's immature and a waste
of my time, and if you don't like it, then you can
blow me.  So, if there are any idiots that just want
to flame me, leave now.
Ok, now that all the idoits and losers are gone, lets
get the disclaimer done so we can get to the good
stuff.

Disclaimer:  I dont own any of the rights related to
Tenchi Muyo! or Dragonball Z, and I'm not gonna try to
copyright this without permission of Pioneer and all
others involved.  I'm not making any money off this,
in fact I'm losing it.  I'm writing this cause Anime
rocks and this fic just had to be written.  This
fanfic may contain strong language that some may find
objectionable.  This is largely due to the fact that
I'm trying to stay true to the charecters' mannerisms,
so it's not likely that any hard core fans will be
offended at all, but you were warned so don't come
bitching at me.  Enjoy this fic or die!

The story (at long last):

Episode One: No Need For Kings!

There was a great celebration on the double ringed
planet known as Jurai.  The entire planet celebrated
the rise of the new Emporer and, simultaneously,
mourned the death of the old King.  It would seem to
the casual observer to be an unusual and curious
mixture of emotion, almost impossible to blend
naturally; however, millenia had molded and shaped
this celebration to perfection, as it had done to
countless other Jurian traditions.  Azusa, though, was
no casual observer.  He saw this celebration for
exactly what it was... a tradition, nothing more.
Just another ritual to perform before he replaced his
dead father as Emporer of Jurai.  Not that he disliked
the tradition or that the people disliked him... quite
the opposite, the people of Jurai loved the royal
family.  There were just some things that Azusa had
been taught to accept unquestionably; one of them was
that tradition was to be upheld and enforced at all
costs, for without tradition, Jurai would be
completely lost.  After all, the Life Water
perpetuated their already impressive longevity to
neigh immortality, and you can't have a race of
immortals running amok without a whit of structure...
such were the makings of an apocalypse.  And today's
procedings were a reminder of that.

The Chairman of the Council of Jurai spoke, his
somber, regal voice echoing through the Council
Chamber, "Crown Prince Azusa, step forward and
approach the council of your people."

Azusa, head held high, ascended the stairs to the
platform that faced the Council.  He was undaunted in
the purest sense of the word.  This particular ritual
was intended to test any claimant to the throne.  A
demonstration of power was used to verify the
authenticity and worthiness of the Ruler-to-be, not
that anyone doubted his claim to the throne... this
was, in this case, a meer demonstration of Jurai's
power.

Azusa adressed the Council, his youth betrayed by his
regal yet brash manner, "I have come to demonstrate to
my people the power and validity of my father's line.
The means I have selected are..."

He paused dramatically to smirk before continuing,
"The Lighthawk Wings."

Many council members gasped.  This was overkill.  But
such was the impudence of youth.  All the council
required was that he manage to manifest and
effectively weild a power sword, but the Lighthawks...
 that was a rare feat indeed.  They were Jurai's most
powerful weapon, so powerful, in fact, that in most
cases it took the power of a Tree-ship to maintain
them effectively.  For a lone individual to muster up
the presence required of the Lighthawks was a
demonstration of true spirit strength.

The Chairman's voice nearly broke as he stuttered,
"Th- then proceed; draw your sword, Azusa."

Azusa's countenance went from cocky to gravely
confident in an instant.  He reached into the fold of
his robes and produced the bladeless hilt that Jurian
swordsmen used to focus their technique.  It was a
long, broad, ornamentaly carved masterpeice, the
wooden texture familiar and comfortable in his hand.

The Jurians had long ago discovered that the wood in
their trees were imbued with special properties which,
when properly stimulated, would manifest in a variety
of ways.  The wood would attune to it's user's spirit,
allowing them to reach great powers hidden within
them.  Jurian swords were the most generic example of
these properties.  They acted as a focusing device,
allowing their weilder to summon forth a terribly
powerful, yet precise, blade of pure energy.

Azusa gripped the sword firmly in his right hand,
gazing down at it, enthralled in introspective
thought.  Then, his grip loosened, and the hilt spun
lazily as it fell to the floor.  It landed before
Azusa's feet, breaking the almost dead silence with a
dull clatter.

"No," he said, simply, as he extended his clenched
right fist.

The crowd gasped as sweat beaded on Azusa's brow while
he concentrated, almost growling, on his fist.  An
audible electric crackle was heard for an instant as
every vein in his right hand rose and stood out
visibly.  Seconds later, a violet blade, almost
exactly matching the color of his long hair,
flickered, then faded before roaring to life above his
hand.  It was thinner than the blade he normally
manifested above his hilt, but that wasnt a problem...
Azusa was merely using it as a focal point.  He closed
his eyes and cleared his mind, reaching deep into
himself until there was nothing but darkness, no room,
no council, just him and his determination.

Suddenly, Azusa's eyes bolted open; he could feel the
energy welling up inside of him.  His limbs and head
thrust back as three violet colored sheilds manifested
before him like the shape of a bird of prey, gently
flickering in and out of existance.  The Lighthawk
Wings.

The Council members rose to their feet as though their
had chairs thrown them out.  Their astonishment still
evident as the Wings disappeared as quickly as they
had come to be.

##########

Many light years away from Jurai, the sun began to
rise over the small planet of Cintuk.  Then Cintuk's
second sun completed the binary sunrise, Golden red
and yellows danced across peaceful green hued clouds.
It was a truely beautiful sight... Not that anyone was
looking at the sky on Cintuk today; all the artists
and philosphers were dead, only bloodthirsty warriors
remained.  Even so, they probably couldn't even seen
the most beautiful portions of the sky for the
billowing black smoke that still filled the air from
the previous night's carnage.  No, there were no more
Cintukians alive on Cintuk anymore... only Saiya-jins.

Rolling blue feilds were scorched pitch black; gray
city streets were mottled with impact craters and
shattered buildings; battlefeilds strewn with peices
of Cintukians and Saiya-jin campfires.

Malicious laughter and the rancid odor of charring
flesh drifted from one of the campfires.  The
Saiya-jin were cooking the flesh of the once
magnificent Cintukian race.  It was breakfast time for
the hungry invaders.

One of the Saiya-jins, however, did not join his
people around the fire, feasting on the burned
carcasses of the planet's original inhabitants.  He
instead stood alone atop a large hill, looking down on
the fruits of his labors.  He was Vegetta, second King
of the newly spreading Saiya-jin empire.  He stood
tall at almost eight feet, a crimson cloak, red as
blood, flowed frim his shoulders, fluttering lazily in
the breeze.  His dark onix hair fell in sharp locks,
resting on his shoulders, beginning in a regally high
hairline with a stilletto widow's peak.  His brow was
furrowed in thought as he scowled in contemplation.

Suddenly, a wind began to stir around him; the ground
shook and small pebbles lifted into the air as King
Vegetta began to gather his ki.  Energy crackled in
electric archs as his power level manifested itself
around him.  The growl that had begun in the back of
his throat was now a full fledged roar as his fighting
potential skyrocketed while energy gathered itself in
his cupped hand.

Around the fires, the Saiya-jins marveled at the power
level that their blue-lensed scouters showed them.
Some scouters exploded, having not been adjusted to
read their king's large power level.  They read
Vegetta's power at around 8,000.

Then, just as his ki was almost to the point of
discharge, Vegetta quickly released it, letting it
dissipate back into the internal workings of the
universe, and wiped the light sweat from his brow.

Just as the display was over, the Saiya-jins went back
to eating, all except for one.  He was the King's
cheif advisor and top general.  He was also one of the
few Saiya-jin that shared the rank of Elite with the
King.  The General stepped up beside the King
silently, his black hair flowing down to the middle of
his back; his brown tail swished behind him.  The
General's face was angular yet masculine, his chest
bare save for the thick gilded necklace that hung
across his upper pectorals.  He was also the only
person on Planet Vegetta that could match the King's
physical size.

"What's wrong, cousin?" the General asked.

Vegetta snorted, "Hmmph!  You presume too much.  I was
simply reminding the troops who the most powerful
Saiya-jin is.  Besides, I doubt they objected to the
little show... if there's one thing we Saiya-jins
appreciate, it's power."

"You're full of shit, Vegetta."

"I don't care if you are my cousin, Brolly, you WILL
show me the proper respect.  I don't even let my
fucking son talk to me like that," Vegetta spat.

"Your Highness's humble servant was merely trying to
determine the source of His Majesty's troubles,"
Brolly said with a mocking flourish and bow, voice
dripping with sarcasm.

"Baka," Vegetta smirked.

"Bitch," Brolly shot back.

Both men erupted into laughter before Vegetta's right
hook connected with Brolly's jaw, sending him
sprawling to the ground.  Brolly got to one knee and
wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth, smiling.

The left corner of Vegetta's mouth raised to a smirk
as he chuckled, "You always let your gaurd down too
quickly, Brolly.  I just couldn't resist giving you a
little dental work."

Brolly got to his feet, "I knew something was
bothering you.  You always hit me when I'm right."

"I'm bored, Brolly.  There's no one strong enough to
give me a decent challenge.  Sure, I'll kill those
weaker than me and enjoy every minute of it, that's
the Saiya-jin way, but it's just not as fun if you
don't loose any blood."

"We could have you cloned.  Then you'd have an
opponent just as strong as you."

"You and I both know that won't do any good.
Saiya-jin DNA is too unstable.  Everytime we try to
clone ourselves, we end up with monosylabic baka
incapable of any thought beyond basic strategy.  That
stupidity makes them too easy to kill.  That's why we
add plant DNA to our own when we make Saibamen... to
stabilize it."

"That and it makes them taste better," Brolly laughed.

Vegetta just smirked.

Brolly looked over, "Don't worry, the universe is a
big place... we'll find somebody strong sooner or
later.  It's just a little bad luck that we happen to
be surrounded by weaklings at the moment."

##########

It had been a month since Azusa had been corronated
and he was already bored with the palace life.  He was
not content to take his messages in the royal gardens.
 If he was going to play politics for his empire, he
had decided to play them from the feild.  That's why
his Tree-ship streaked across the void between Jurai
and a planet on the frontier that they had been
planning on adopting into the Empire.  It was a large
planet, fully inhabited, technologically advanced and
just beginning to have to look for rescources off
planet in the surrounding space.  It was a succulent
fruit, ripe for the picking.

This is why the hulking wooden prow of the ship surged
forth, it's course set straight for the Planet Kiruu.

"Sire," the left Gaurdian began, "We are within
fifteen minutes of Planet Kiruu.  Would you care to
see a holoprojection of the planet?"

"Yes, Yosuki, that would be good."

Azusa looked up from his tea, gazing up at the image
on the holographic screen that Yosuki summoned.  The
sphere was swirled with green and blue, covered with
thin penninsulas and archipelligos.  Whispy clouds
streaked through it's atmosphere.

"It is quite a beautiful planet, isn't it?" Azusa
commented.

"Very beautiful indeed," concurred Hiroe, the right
Gaurdian.

"Quite" agreed Yosuki.

Azusa resumed sipping his tea.

"Sire, I believe there is a problem," stated Hiroe
frankly.

Azusa raised a brow, "What is it?"

"There is already a ship in orbit of Kiruu that is far
too large to be native.  It does not match any
registry or design in our memory banks.  I believe we
have been beaten to the punch."

Azusa stood, furrowing his brow in consternation.

"Kuso..." he swore under his breath.

##########

King Vegetta smirked at the pathetically weak power
levels of every one of the frog-like beings present at
the Planetary Council of Kiruu.  Even the council
gaurds barely had a fighting potential of 500 between
the ten of them.

"If it weren't for their advanced technology everyone
on this planet would already be dead," Vegetta
thought, amused, "But it's still early in the morning,
maybe they'll be stupid and let me have some fun."

He chuckled to himself, which visually unnerved the
council members; only the gaurd members held their
resolve.

The Council Leader nervously croaked, "K-k-king
Vegetta, the Saiya-jin reputation preceeds you.  Quite
frankly, I'm at l-loss as to why your troops haven't
stormed our planet but if you think..."

"Bah!" Vegetta interupted, then laughed, "YOUR
planet...  That's exactly what I'm here about.  You
see, we Saiya-jins want this planet, and, to be
honest, don't really care much for it's current
inhabitants; however, you little frogs seem to be very
good with technology.  That's a skill we Saiya-jins
sometimes lack.  I personally shot down one of your
cruisers the other day, and was very impressed with
how quickly your people got the ship running again...
of course, they still didn't escape me alive, but
that's another story."

He continued, "I have come here today to offer you
frogs a position as a Territory World in the Saiya-jin
Empire, you'll be ruled by us, of course; and all you
have to do is serve aboard our Battleships, in case we
ever need repairs or upgrades."

"In exchange for what?" the Leader croaked
indignantly.

"Your lives," Vegetta said, his brown tail swishing
behind him.

Tbe Council murmered behind him as the Leader spoke,
"Damn you!  I will not let my people be..."

A council member to the right of the Leader spoke up,
"Council Leader, Please!  I think we should at least
consider their proposal."

"Yes," Vegetta said, "You should listen to your little
friend, frog-man.  He knows what's good for him."

"No!" shouted the Leader, "I will not give in to the
will of a barbarian!"

King Vegetta laughed, raising his index finger
directly at the Council Leader, "Too bad for you,
baka..."

The tip of the Saiya-jin's finger momentarily glowed
yellow before a golden bolt of ki flew from it.
Within a second, the ki bolt had passed easily through
the perfect center of the Concil Leader's forehead,
out of the back of his skull, and on to the back wall
of the chamber, where it exploded with a grandiose
display of smoke, dust and crackling energy.

The Council gasped in panic as the Leader's eye's
blinked one last time before his body slumped
foreward, blood and gray matter pooling on the podium
before him.

Vegetta laughed maniacally as the Council Gaurds
rushed him, their long, thin swords drawn.  The lead
gaurd took a slash at him, which the Saiya-jin easilly
side-stepped before caving the frog's head in with a
quick jab.  Two other gaurds attempted to flank the
King, but found themselves impalled on each other's
blades when the Saiya-jin quickly jumped over their
jabs.

In the blink of an eye, Vegetta abandoned his
reactionary defense and took the offensive.  He rushed
in towards three gaurds and dispensed with the lot of
them using an aerial spin kick.  The remaining four
gaurds had adopted a defensive formation to Vegetta's
right.  He smirked as he moved faster the the eye
could detect, reappearing in the middle of the
unsuspecting gaurds, who each had their backs turned
to him.  The King lunged foreward, delivering a fatal
single-footed buck-kick to the spine of the gaurd
directly behind him.  He simultaneously placed the
frog in front of him in a choking headlock before
snapping his neck.

The other two gaurds panicked, and began to flee in
oppisite directions.  Vegetta simply raised both arms
parallel to the floor, pointed his open palms at them,
and let them get to the point where they thought they
would get away before enveloping them in ki blasts
that quickly caused their bodies to evaporate.

Just then, Brolly's voice clicked on over the earpeice
of the King's scouter.

"Sire," he spoke, "We have detected a large vessel
approaching the planet... you may want to come and see
this."

Vegetta frowned and glared at the terrified Council.

"I will return in one hour.  Make your descision by
then."

##########

Azusa stared at the large Battleship that appeared on
his holoscreen.  It was a hulking mass of crimson
metal, with many portals that resembled man-sized
escape hatches along the sides.  On the underbelly, it
had rows pod shaped hemispheres that ran in parallel
lines.  These hemishperes didnt match the color of the
main hull, but were instead white and green.  There
were no visible weapons.  In shape it was long and
streamlined, resembeling a finless shark.  This main
hull shape was dotted with smaller, yet still large
pod shaped out croppings, almost reminisent the remora
that would cling to an actual shark.

Azusa asked, "Yosuki, does that ship have any
weapons?"

"I have detected no weapon systems of any kind."

"However," Hiroe added, "I have detected a large
amount of storage space within the vessel.  It may be
a cargo ship."

"Or a troop transport," Azusa commented, skeptically,
"You see those pods on the bottom of the ship?  Could
they be used to carry soldiers?"

"It is possible," Yosuki answered.

"But unlikely," Hiroe added.

"All scans indicate that those pod are only large
enough for one person."

"It is more likely that they are escape pods."

"I don't know..." Azusa said.

"Sire," Hiroe started, "The ship is requesting
communication."

The image of the red ship was quicky replaced with
that of a large man wearing a crimson cloak.  He
appeared vaguely Jurian, with subtle differences.  His
eyes were triangular and predatorial, with more pupil
than iris.  His course black hair was not unkempt, but
definantly uncombed, as it fell to his shoulders in
sharp angles.  Other than that, he could probably pass
for Jurian... if you gave him a change of clothes and
a LONG bath.

"Well, well, aren't you dressed regally?" the large
man began, "At first I thought I might have a good
fight on my hands when I saw that big ship of yours,
but now I realize that you can't cant be a warrior, at
least not dressed like that."

Azusa's blood boiled; veins became visible on his
forehead.  This man might not be able to pass for
Jurian after all.

His rage visible in his eyes, Azusa barked, "You
insolent curr!  You dare to speak that way to the
Emporer of Jurai!  I'll have you..."

The large man laughed, "Bah!  Emporer, eh?  Well don't
worry, Baka-sama, we Saiya-jins treat all weaklings
with equal comtempt.  I am King Vegetta of the
Saiya-jin Empire, and you'll have my respect when you
earn it!"

"That explains it," Azusa thought, beginning to check
his temper, "Non-Jurain royalty could be so arrogant.
Juria's Royalty had risen to power through the choice
of the people and strict adherance to tradition, which
has kept us humble.  This 'king' obviously came to
power through brute force, with no love from his
people."

"Well then King Vegetta," Azusa began, trying to keep
the contempt out of his voice when he said 'king',
"Perhaps now that we know each other's position among
their people, we might be able start this conversation
anew, and give each other the respec..."

"Not now, Baka-sama," Vegetta interupted, "I don't
have time to flirt with some backwater emporer at the
moment.  I'm far too busy trying to conquer this
planet.  Now if you'll wait about forty-five minutes,
I might be able to play then."

With that, the Saiya-jin King gave a dismissive
gesture and terminated the transmission.

Many thoughts raced through Azusa's head.  Afer only
one month as Emporer, he already had to deal with a
hostile empire.  A hostile empire that had little to
no regard for any sort of tradition.  An empire of
criminals and pirates.  An Empire of pirates that was
about to share a border with Jurai.  This was not good
at all.  This could start a war.

##########

Brolly looked at Vegetta and jerked his head toward
the door.  He was about to question the King's
judgement, but was not about to risk questioning it in
front of the troops.  Vegetta saw Brolly's motion and
took the signal.  The two strode out into the hall
where they would be alone.

"Spare me your lectures on caution, Brolly.  I know
what I'm doing."

"Shut up, Vegetta.  You're getting careless.  You
didn't even check your scouter to get a reading on
that ship, but I did.  It's a good thing that guy
didn't decide to fire on us.  We would win the fight,
but we wouldn't make it home.  You'll forgive me if I
don't want to spend the rest of my life on a planet
full of frogs."

Vegetta snorted, "I don't know, Brolly, it wouldn't be
that bad.  Those frogs look pretty tastey to me...
which reminds me, I better see whether or not those
bastards want to keep breathing."

"I thought you gave them an hour."

"I lied.  Get the troops in their pods and put them on
standby.  I need the ability to have this planet
leveled quicker than that purple-haired tree boy can
react, just in case he tries to stop us."

With that, Vegetta left to return to the planet's
surface.

Well, that's the first episode.  Send feedback to
celtic_wolfman_42@yahoo.com   Stay tuned for the next
Ep.  Tensions rise until the situation turns into a
battle for Planet Kiruu.  It all keeps building up
until the two empires are pushed to the brink of war!
Who sheds first blood?  Who's left standing?  Will the
Empires destroy each other?  Time will tell.  It'll be
worth the wait  ^_^  !/