No Need for Trials and Tribulations
      By: Camikyra

Author's Note: Yes, its that time again, kiddies! Someone's let Cami out 
of her cage to unleash her second Tenchi fanfic of all time! Yes, of ALL 
TIME!! Oh...you're not impressed...oh well...on with the story...

Disclaimer: Pioneer...yadayadayada...AIC...yadayadayada...I don't own 
nothin'...let's get this fic started...
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
	"...I guess you're right, Ryoko..."	

	Ryoko's embrace was surprisingly warm, tender. So unlike the car-
crushing hugs I'd received in the past. We'd stopped walking long ago, 
simply enjoying each others' company. I could stay like this forever, 
but first:
	I had to get to school.
	I'd already missed nearly six months of school in my death-
defying- yet strangely enjoyable- adventures with the girls. I'd have to 
return soon, unless I wanted to repeat my Junior year. 
	Gently, I put my hands on Ryoko's shoulders and held her at arm's 
length. I nearly laughed out loud at the happy-puppy look on her face.
	"Ryoko," I said, catching her attention. Much to my surprise, 
tears sparkled in her golden eyes. "Ryoko, listen. As much as I would 
like to stay with you, I really have to get to school. Go back to the 
house, and when I get home, we'll talk all about your 'adventure'."
	She nodded absently and I wondered if she'd heard a word I'd said. 
After a momentary pause, she gave me a final hug, more like her 
traditional hugs, and teleported away.
***
	 I wasn't even that late, but I was late enough. I slipped into 
the room as silently as possible, took my seat seat next to Amagisake, 
and pulled out my math book. The room had gone dead silent. I looked up 
without raising my head and found everyone staring at me.
	"Well, Mr. Masaki," Mr. Hideo chimed, "so nice of you to join us!"
	I smiled nervously.
	"Care to tell us where you've been?"
	"You wouldn't believe me if I told you..." I responded, flipping 
my book open. 
	"Try me." The reply was sharp, harsh, and it startled me; Mr. 
Hideo was generally a very nice guy.
	"Well..." I took a deep breath. Should I tell him the truth? Only 
a crazy man would believe my story. "Believe it or not, I had six alien 
girls crash land on my front lawn, who told me I was the prince of the 
most powerful planet in the universe."
	Mr. Hideo was unimpressed. "And what happened when you woke up?"
	It took my a minute to realize he thought I'd been dreaming. "No! 
I'm serious!" I pleaded.
	Mr. Hideo gave me a patronizing nod. "Uh-huh...do you have any 
evidence of these...aliens? A piece of their spaceship, perhaps?"
	I chuckled. "They'd kill me if I took a piece of their 
spaceships..." I stopped laughing when I realized I was receiving the 
death glare. "Don't you trust my word?"
	"Nope."
	"Oookay...I know! Why don't I give Ryoko a call!"
	"Is this 'Ryoko' of yours one of these aliens?"
	I nodded. "She's...well...nevermind, its not important."
	"Go on, you've sparked my interest now."
	"Well...she used to be the greatest space pirate in the galaxy, 
but living with me me has made her...well...soft."
	Some of my classmates stifled laughs, other echoed catcalls.
	Mr. Hideo's eyes widened. "She lives with you?!"
	"Yeah, well...they had nowhere to go and-"
	"They?!"
	"Yeah, there are...six...of them..."
	The wolf whistles grew louder.
	"Well," Mr. Hideo said, standing. "Let's go give your space pirate 
a call."
	I nodded and stood as well, and as I did, the rest of the class 
stood with me. I gave them a puzzled look and glanced at Mr. Hideo. He 
made no effort to stop them.
***
	Before long, I found myself standing in the main office, phone in 
hand and twenty-eight eager students hanging over my shoulder. I did my 
best to ignore them and dialed my home number. The reply was that which 
the girls took great pride in speaking:
	"Hello? Masaki residence."
	"Ryoko!"
	"Tenchi?"
	"Ryoko, I need your help."
	"Uh...okay..."
	"I need you to meet me at school as soon as possible."
	"Okay..." 
	"Oh, and bring Tenchi-ken." This got me some weird looks from the 
crowd. It also got me a much different reaction from Ryoko.
	"What?! Are you out of your flippin' mind?! Hello! Earth to 
Tenchi! If I so much as breath on that thing, it'll blow me to 
smithereens!!"
	"Ryoko! Calm down!"
	"Oh...I see how it is...this is one of Ayeka's not-so-clever plans 
to kill me off...well, ya know what? ITS NOT GONNA WORK!!"
	"Ryoko!!"
	"What?"
	"This has nothing to do with Ayeka!"
	"Oh."
	"Okay now. I've given you permission to hold Tenchi-ken-" my 
classmates snickered. "-so don't worry. We'll meet you outside, okay?"
	"Okay."
	"See you soon."
	"This had better be good, Masaki..." Mr. Hideo muttered under his 
breath as he lead the class out of the office and onto the front lawn.
	Most of the students were quite pleased with my return, and 
thanked me for the free time I was buying them. Once outside, Amagisake 
elbowed me and lowered himself to my level.
	"So..." He began, a mischievious sparkle in his beady eyes. 
"What're they like? Are they cute?"
	I laughed. "They're not very cute when they're blowing things up-" 
I received a look from Amagisake that clearly said "They blow stuff 
up?!". "-but they do have thir moments. Well, why don't you see for 
yourself?"
	Ryoko had apparently teleported to the end of the school's long 
driveway, and approached the school walking. She twirled Tenchi-ken in 
one hand while glancing around the schoolgrounds. Her eyes fell on my 
class, and then she caught my gaze. Her face lit up lit a Christmas tree 
and she disappeared, reappearing around my neck.
	"Tenchi!" She cooed. "I missed you sooo much!"
	Trying to breath and reason with Ryoko at the same time is not an 
easy task.
	"I just...talked to you...five minutes...ago..."
	"Oh...so you did...but I still missed you, my Tenchi!"
	All movement among the class had stopped and, once again, everyone 
was staring at me. I managed to wiggle free of her grasp.
	"Mr. Hideo," I said, "meet Ryoko Hakubi, the space pirate."
	"That's Ryoko Hakubi Masaki, the notorious space pirate!" She 
corrected with a bow.
	Mr. Hideo didn't have a response.
	I turned to Ryoko. "Mr. Hideo didn't believe that I'd spent the 
last six months travelling through space with you and the girls," I 
explained. "So here you are."
	"Aha..." She replied, tossing Tenchi-ken to me. "Well, we'll have 
to prove him wrong then, won't we?"
	She zoomed into the air, peaking her flight with an elegant flip. 
A small ball of crackling energy materialized in her extended hand, and 
she allowed it to linger there for a moment, before squeezing it, 
turning it into a brilliant sword. That pirate grin of hers danced on 
her lips as she spun the sword a couple of times, and dove down at 
record-breaking speed.
	I had no more than a split-second to activate my sword and bring 
it up to meet hers. Orange clashed with blue, causing white sparks to 
jump into the cool morning air. I pulled my sword back, making her 
stumble in air. She hacked at my sword, but my strength triumphed, and I 
ended up pushing her away. Rather than persisting, she spiraled upward 
at least fifty feet, and swooped down again. I spun my sword casually, 
meeting her orange blade on its way up. I could feel her muscles tighten 
through the link of the swords as she pressed forward. Her pirate grin 
reflected on my own face, I found, as my strength built up to match 
hers.
	Her face mere inches from mine, she asked through gritted teeth. 
"How am I doing?" 
	"You're out of practice, Ryoko!" I replied, widening my smile.
	With a finalized blow, I released the tension on the swords and 
brought Tenchi-ken down on her wrist. Hand and sword clattered to the 
ground. The crowd of students held their breath. Ryoko stifled a laugh 
and clutched her stub of an arm.
	"O woe is me!" She cried in mock defeat. "The pain! The agony!" 
Spinning on her toes, she floated to the ground, where she exploded in 
laughter. From behind me, I heard what sounded like someone fainting. I 
took one look at the awestruck crowd and joined Ryoko in rolling on the 
dewy grass in laughter.
	"WHAT is going on here?!" 
	I promptly sat up as an authoritizing voice boomed from the 
doorway of the school. Ryoko sat up, too, propping herself up on a new 
hand. Neither of us was smiling anymore. My principal had come to put a 
stop to our fun.
	I've often been complimented on the softness of my brown eyes, and 
while I've failed to see it, if my eyes were soft, Mr. Kahuni's were the 
complete opposite. His steely brown eyes could pierce a hole in even the 
strongest heart.
	His footsteps echoed through the damp ground as he strolled toward 
us. "Tenchi Masaki..." He drawled, an obvious sound of disappointment in 
his voice. "You, of all students..." He made sure he was standing square 
before me. I wanted to slink away under his threatening gaze, but if I 
valued my life, I knew it better to stay put.
	"What ruckus have you been causing, Masaki?" His eyes fell upon 
Tenchi-ken. "Possessing a weapon on school property...tsk tsk..." He 
bent down to get a better look at it. "However, it is quite a fine piece 
of woodwork..." I saw his hand reach out to pick it up.
	"Uh...sir-!" I warned.
	"But a weapon's a weapon. I'll just have to- AHHH!!" A wave of 
blue sparks swept over the old hilt, catching Mr. Kahuni's fingertips. 
Ryoko giggled from beside me. I silently willed her to keep her mouth 
shut. I have to admit, his reaction was pretty funny, but apparently the 
Big Kahuna doesn't take well to a little energy zap.
	"MASAKI!!! My office! NOW!!"
***
	"Sorry, Tenchi..."
	"For what?"
	"For getting you in trouble."
	"Aw, don't worry about it, its not your fault," I sighed. "But I 
am seriously considering home-schooling..."
	Ryoko leaned back in her chair and folded her hands behind her 
head.
	"I had fun, though, Tenchi,"
	"Yeah..."
	"We should spar more often!"
	I laughed. "And risk having my head inadvertantly cut off? You may 
be out of practice, Ryoko, but once you're in practice, you could easily 
slice off any limb."
	Ryoko chuckled. "The same would apply to you, Tenchi."
	The simple wooden door in front of us swung open and the secretary 
stepped out.
	"Come on in, Tenchi," She said, holding the door open for us. "But 
I'll warn you..." She lowered her voice. "He's not in a very good mood."
	"So much I figured..." I muttered.
	Ryoko smiled and stepped in. I, on the hand, was not so energetic 
about facing my death.
	Being an honor roll student as I was, I'd never been in the 
principal's office before. Surprisingly, it wasn't the completely-
hardwood-domain I'd imagined it to be. In reality, it looked like it was 
really an ordinary classroom, with a carpet over the tiled floor.
	Ryoko had brought Tenchi-ken into Mr. Kahuni's office only fifteen 
minutes prior, and it now sat on the edge of his desk. An unusually long 
pencil sat nearby and I smiled at the thought of the Big Kahuna poking 
Tenchi-ken with it.
	"Wipe that smile off your face, Tenchi," He snapped. "You have no 
right to be happy in a situation like this." I took a seat next to 
Ryoko, which happened to be the chair directly across from Mr. Kahuni.
	"I've already spoken with Mr. Hideo, so I understand the 
situation...more or less. Do you know why you're here, Masaki?"
	I thought for a moment. "Actually, sir, I have no idea why I'm 
here."
	He opened his mouth as if he were going to yell at me, but 
controlled his temper and started again.
	"You are here for many reasons, Tenchi. The most serious of which 
is possessing a weapon on the schoolgrounds. I could send you straight 
to Juvenile Hall for that, but I won't, because I have no idea how to 
work the thing. Secondly, you are charged with-" 
	It was at this point that I tuned out. I glanced over at Ryoko, 
who yawned and pretended to fall asleep. Despite the fact that it was 
really very funny, I shook my head at her, but she paid no attention. 
She went on mocking Mr. Kahuni, waving her hands around, mimicking his 
movement. In her excitement, sparks started to fly from her hands. I 
mouthed the word "no!" over and over again, but it was no use.
	One stray bolt let loose and flew into the rafters, lighting a 
tiny blaze on the first wooden beam it came upon. Slowly, very slowly, 
the fire ate away at the beam, and before long, it came crashing down, 
inches from Mr. Kahuni's head.
	By some strange miracle, he hadn't noticed Ryoko's antics until 
now, and boy, did he notice. His face grew as red as Ryoko's tanktop and 
had this been a cartoon, steam would billow from his ears.
	"GET OUT OF MY OFFICE, NOW!!!"
***
	"Geez..." Ryoko stated while watching the clouds scroll by 
overhead. "He really needs to make up his mind..."
	I hung my head, scuffing my feet in the fallen cherry blossoms.
	"Cheer up, Tenchi," Ryoko said, glancing my way. "Getting expelled 
isn't so bad. I mean, it could've been worse."
	Naturally, I wasn't in the best mood. "Yeah? Like how? Getting my 
head ripped off and my eyeballs chewed out?"
	"Well...yeah!"
	"Gee, thanks."
	"No problem," She went back to watching the clouds go by as we 
walked home.
	I kicked a rock and tightened my grip on Tenchi-ken. "I don't 
believe how much trouble you girls have gotten me into! Just when I 
thought I could go back to living a normal life-"
	"Are you implying that a life with us isn't normal?"
	"Yes!" Had I not been so mad, my sensibility might've kicked in 
and realized it wasn't Ryoko who replied,
	It was Washu.
	It wasn't until I spun around to continue my rant when it occured 
to me that I was face to face with that all-too-familiar red-haired 
genius...
	And Mihoshi...
	And Kiyone...
	And Ryo-oh-ki...
	And Sasami...
	The tiny dams that held Sasami's tears at bay broke loose, and she 
flung herself around my waist, sobbing into my school vest. The sight of 
these familiar faces overjoyed me, despite how mad at them I was only 
seconds earlier. I hugged Sasami back and stroked Ryo-oh-ki's fuzzy 
little head as she jumped onto my shoulder.
	"Group hug!" Mihoshi shouted, and the rest of the crew rushed 
forward. Before I knew it, I had five girls and a cabbit giving me a 
rib-reaking hug. But, surprisingly, Ryoko wasn't part of it. I expected 
her to rush to break us up, but instead, she stood her ground. I looked 
up, and she looked up, too, with the most tender smile on her face I've 
ever seen.
	"Well," She said. "The gang's all here, it looks like life is back 
to normal."
	The only response was Ryo-oh-ki's affirmative "miya!".
	"I think this calls for a party! A Tenchi Party!" Sasami called. 
Everyone let out their agreement. So that was that: I was having a party 
for being expelled from school.
***
	I was so stuffed full with cake I thought I would explode. I left 
the party for a moment and went outside to get some fresh air. The 
usually silent night air was broken with the sounds of the "Tenchi 
Party" behind me. 
	I know this is a weird statement, especially coming from me, but 
it wasn't as noisy as it should've been.
	Ayeka never arrived.
	Sasami had told me that Ayeka ran away soon after I had left, and 
that she'd assumed the princess had come here. Now, as I stood under the 
cherry trees, I found myself gazing up at the sparkling stars, praying 
that Ayeka was okay. I walked through the line of trees to the pond's 
edge and sat down to admire the moon shimmering on the water.
	"What are you thinking?"
	I nearly jumped at Ryoko's question, but settled as she sat down 
beside me. She pulled her knees to her chest, and smoothed out her sky 
blue kimono before tossing her head to the stars. Despite the fact that 
I was still furious with her for getting me expelled, she looked 
absolutely stunning in the moonlight. 
	"I was just...thinking." I replied. She nodded, but kept her gaze 
turned to the sky. I waited for a response, but when none came, I looked 
back to the lake. As soon as I had my head turned, she spoke up.
	"I have something serious to talk with your about, Tenchi."
	Ryoko? Serious? "Okay...what's up?"
	She took a deep breath, but kept her eyes on the stars. "I know 
you love me."
	This statement startled me.
	"Don't try to deny it. I know it, you know it, Sasami knows it, 
everyone knows it! The only question is: why don't you just come out and 
say it?"
	I bowed my head. "I...I..." What was I supposed to say in a 
situation like this? "I don't want to hurt any of you."
	"You mean you don't want to hurt Ayeka."
	"I didn't say that."	
	Ryoko didn't reply.
	"Ryoko...you have no idea how much you girls torment me. Why 
should I be obligated to choose one of you two? I know it may be hard 
for you to believe, Ryoko, but I did have a life before you showed up."
	"You don't mean that."	
	"I do! This is exactly what I mean, Ryoko! You're dictating my 
life! Did you forget what I once said, back in your dream world?" I 
stood up to emphasize the seriousness of the situation. "'That's your 
wishful thinking'? Well here it is again: that's your wishful thinking! 
What makes you think I don't mean what I say?"
	She stood up as well, looking very hurt. She took the few steps 
that separated us and wrapped her arms around my waist. 
	"No..." She said, her voice beginning to waver. "I never forgot 
what you said, but you seem to have forgotten what I said earlier today. 
'I'm going to win your heart in the fairest of fights.' I mean that."
	I sighed. How could she be so wrong, yet so right?
	"I love you, Tenchi. From the bottom of my twisted pirate heart. I 
don't want you to be mad at me. If it makes any difference to you, I 
been researching into your getting expelled. As it turns out, your 
principal was fired this very day for his irrationality. You're free to 
go back to school whenever you like." I took my eyes away from the stars 
for a moment and looked down at the cyan-haired girl in my arms. 
	"You have no idea how much you've changed me, Tenchi. Seven 
hundred years ago, while I was still a wild space pirate, I would never 
have even dreamed that I'd someday be in the arms of the sweetest boy on 
earth..." Her voice trailed off, and my shoulder became damp with tears. 
I held her close, and she stopped crying.
	"I do love you, Ryoko, but...sometimes...sometimes I wish you'd 
look before you leap."
	Ryoko laughed and looked up at me, her tears creating shimmering 
stars in the still air. "See? Was that so hard?"
	"Actually, yes."
	She giggled. "Come on," She said, leading me back toward the 
house. "We're missing out on the party."
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
Author's Note: I left what happened to Ayeka up to you. Yeah, I know, a 
lame writing tactic, but I needed to get her outta the way somehow! Holy 
Achika, mother of Tenchi, that was a short fic. Anywho, did ya like it? 
Hate it? Fell asleep halfway through it? Tell me what ya think at 
Ryoko_MasakiLH@tenchiintokyo.org. Thank you, come again, and buy a 
squeeshie!!