Masaki inc.  Chapter 1
A Tenchi Muyo! Fanfic.
By the one and only BGlanders!


                                        CHAPTER I
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It was a hot, steamy, miserable day and I was in no mood to deal with customers.  So what if the bills were piling up?  I had everything I needed right here; my colt 45 and a bottle of Jack, Daniel's that is.  My names Masaki.  I'm a private eye with a nose for clues and a mouth that shoots off more than my gun.  Aside from my facial description I'm about as average as the next guy.  That doesn't seem to defer the chicks, but like I'm really concerned by that.  

Anyway, it was a pretty miserable day, but hey, when its summer in Japan who really notices?  Suddenly my secretary buzzed me on the intercom.  "Mr. Masaki, a Miss Jurai is here to see you."  I put my whiskey under the desk and straightened my tie.  "Send her in, Mihoshi."  My ditzy secretary pressed several buttons on the squawk box and finally found the one that shuts it off.  Ahh Mihoshi, if you weren't so damn cute I would have thrown you out on your tanned ass years ago.

Suddenly SHE walked in.  She was all woman, I could tell just by gawking at her.  She had long, purple hair that was tied in two long, thin ribbons.  Her skin was as smooth as silk and her chest was like new cars; large, smooth, and built to drool over.  After awhile, I noticed she had a head, so I raised my gaze to meet her own.  "Mr. Masaki?"

"That's what it says on my police record," I answered her.

She batted her eyes at me and reached into her purse.  After awhile she brought out exactly what I was hoping she would, a whip.

"Oh my!  I'm sorry, I thought I'd left that at home."

She put the whip back into her purse and then brought out a pile of money.  Damn.  I think I preferred the whip.

"Mr. Masaki, my brother has been missing for awhile, and I just didn't know where else to turn to.

"Hmm, how long has he been missing, Miss Jurai?"

"Um, about 700 years."

I paused, thinking this case might be a bit harder than I had thought, but what the hell?  She was paying cash up front and besides, she carried a whip in her purse.

"Why don't you tell me all about it, Miss Jurai?"

"Well, my brother, Yosho, he was in a fight with a demon."

"A demon?"

"Well, she was a demoness.  She had this ugly cyan hair and these horrid yellow eyes.  Her and Yosho got into a huge fight and then she took off.  Yosho followed her, even though I begged him not to.  I sat at home and waited, but he never came back."

"You waited 700 years for your brother to get back?"

"Well, we were engaged.  I wasn't planning on dating for at least a millennia after he left, but I just couldn't be without him!"

"Let me get this straight; you were engaged to your brother over 700 years ago until he got in a fight with a demon?"

"Yes, that just about covers it." 

What the hell?  I've handled worse and have gone on less leads that this in the past.  For instance there were these two cats that were looking for this princess once...

Nevermind.  I'm getting off track.  Miss Jurai handed me a picture of her brother.  Then she handed me a picture of a young woman that set my pulse racing.  I wondered if she carried a whip in her purse too.  

"That's Ryoko.  She was the demon that made my brother leave."

She gave me the cash and the pictures, then slid me a card with a phone number on it.  "Here's my number if you get lucky."  I refrained from making the obvious crack and pocketed the items...in my pocket.  After she left, I got out my phone book and started hunting.

Three hours and five cups of coffee later I had found my demon.  She was working as a stripper in a place called 'The Cave'.  I headed over there with the wad of bills Miss Jurai had given me and started ogling for answers. 

After waiting through three shows, Ryoko came out for all to see.  Damn.  After the show I caught up to her in the dressing room.    

"Miss Ryoko?"

"That's my name."  She cooed.

I flashed my badge and puffed up my chest.  "My names Tenchi Masaki, I'm a private eye.  I'm looking for a Yosho Jurai.  Have you seen him?"  I handed her Yosho's picture and she gave it a good long look.  Finally she handed it back.

"Yeah, I know him.  He's the bastard that trapped me in here.  About 700 years ago, he and I, well, we had an affair.  I was young and willing, he was hot and looking.  It was over before it began.  Then he never called or wrote, so I decided to get tanked and bitch him out about it."

She was starting to sob, so I pulled out my handkerchief and handed it to her.  She gave it a hardy blow and continued.

"I burst in there screaming for blood.  That prissy little bitch Aeka was there with him.  Those Jurians, always trying to sleep with their sisters.  Anyway, I started screaming 'why?  Why did you sleep with me and then never call?'  He looked from me to Aeka and I started to trash his apartment.  That's when I ran, and he followed.  He finally caught up to me at my place and asked if there was anything he could do.  I told him I needed money, so he landed me a job here.  Only later I found out this was a 700 year contract deal."

I nodded and wrote her canned monologue on my notepad.  Then I told her to keep the handkerchief.  She muttered gomen and turned to a picture on her wall.  It was Yosho, but it was really hard to tell, since a bunch of darts and knives were protruding from it.  "Yosho," she muttered, "how I hate you!"

I asked if she knew where he was now and she shook her head no, so I left a bill or two on the nightstand and told her to have dinner on me.  She thanked me again and I headed out to my next lead.

When I hit the street I realized that I didn't have a next lead.  Damn.  I decided that it was too late for leads and time to get drunk.  I headed over to Washu's.

Washu's was where everybody knew your name, 'cause she would yell it out as soon as you walked in.  "Tenchi!"  She screamed as I sauntered through the door.  "Evening little Washu.  Got any new cocktails tonight?"  Washu was the greatest bartender in the universe.  Every night she had some new drink to offer the world.  She was short and a redhead.  For some reason she always had everyone call her 'Little Washu'.  Hey, for the prices she offered and the beer she served, who cares what she wanted to be called?

"I'm glad you asked, Tenchi," she smiled a smile that sent a chill up my spine.  "You wanna be my guinea pig?"  I swallowed a lump the size of a cabbit and said, "Sure, what the hell?"  She brought out a glass with some glowing green fluid bubbling over the edge.  I noticed she was handling it with metal tongs and was keeping a healthy distance away.  "Drink up!"  She chirped from behind her welding mask.  It was gonna be a loooong night.

TO BE CONTINUED...


Is this the end for Detective Masaki?

Will Yosho ever be found?

Does Ryoko work parties and if so, how much?

Will the author ever get paid for his services?

Who really cares?

The answers (maybe) to all these and other pointless questions will be answered in the next pulse-pounding chapter!


Thanks for reading.  And a special thanks to GenSao for so graciously posting my fics.  I would like to ask you Otaku's for a little help now.  A while back I started a little crossover called LEGENDS and I hat to leave it hanging.  I need help on it.  I REALLY need help on it.  I've got several ideas on how to work it, one including El-Hazard.  I need someone with some serious knowledge of the Senshi and who doesn't care about time.  Ahh well, its worth a shot.  

All this crap belongs to Pioneer and AiC.  The story line, however, is MINE.

BTW:  my spellchecker works!!!!!!

All C&C should go to Bglanders@aol.com