Disclaimer: The whole Tenchi
set up is property of AIC and Pioneer.
Kazekera and The Tenchi O-Rusuta© 
universe arrangment were created 
and devised by The Jetset 
(Jinchi, Kage Maru 3:16 and Diabolo).

This is mainly a characterisation episode,
I'm afraid and there is a tiny weeny bit
of lime content at the beginning but it's
nothing to worry about and if you are a
child and don't understand some of the
words don't go asking your perants-
it's not worth it. I think it gets funny
at the end so try to enjoy it all or
just skip the boring bits.
-Jim

	TENCHI O-RUSUTA©: KAZEKERA
      PART 7: REMINISCENCES AND FAMILY

The morning sun shone down through the windows into the 
sitting room, where
everyone in the Masaki house was lazing around in the 
after-breakfast haze. 
It had not been one of Sesami's out-and-out banquets, 
but it had been pretty substantial and they were still 
recovering from sleep.
Nobiyuki came in, crisp and bright from the shower.
He didn't breakfast very often and got up early. The 
other's looked at him in distaste for polluting the 
atmosphere of total slobishness, but also in doing 
so he got everyone's attention.
"Hello, everyone!" he said "As you know, today I will 
be quitting my job and working as a freelance architect."
Murmurs of agreement came back, and eyes were turned on 
him.
"And I need someone who can help me. This also includes..." 
Nobiyuki waved his credit card, and all the girls heads 
followed it.
"...a shopping trip courtesy of me and me flexible 
friend." 
Ryoko bit her lip to avoid laughing out loud.
"And this person or people have to be tough."
The space pirate raised an eyebrow.
"I need some people who won't cause problems." 
"Obviously that's me." Replied Ayeka and Kiyone together.
"People who are smart, on the ball..."
Yosho and Washu exchanged glances
"People who can be fun..."
"That's us!" shouted Mihoshi and Sesami, and Ryo-Ohki 
'Miya'd'. 
(Mihoshi was now hanging around more with Sesami because 
she was still upset about what Kiyone had said. 
She had also taken to sleeping in the lab with Kaz. 
Kiyone was assuming it was 
just a phase, but she was still sad and hoped that 
Mihoshi would be friends with her again soon.)
"And I need someone whose grateful enough to me to 
want to help me."
Everyone replied with a stream of thanks to him.
Nobiyuki shushed them and finished his speech.
"But most of all I need someone who'll be willing to 
carry heavy stuff from my office."
Everyone suddenly lost interest or pretended to be working. 
Nobiyuki sweat-dropped.
"You people are a real help." He said defeatedly. He 
looked expectantly at Tenchi and Kazekera who were 
watching the proceedings with great amusement.
"Hard luck dad. You lost them there." Smiled Tenchi
"I could come, Mr. Masaki." Kazekera said kindly. He 
didn't seem in the least worried about going out again 
despite what had happened only yesterday. And Mihoshi's 
quick explanation of what was really going on ('Those two 
men wanted to prove themselves by fighting a current 
champion. And they knew he was on Earth by his pod's 
vapour trails.') which may have skipped on detail but 
was very reassuring, had stopped everyone else being 
perturbed by it.
"Kazekera? You'd do that for me?" Nobiyuki replied, 
not quite starry eyed but working up to it.
"Of course. I charge ten grand a hour." Nobiyuki almost 
had a heart attack until Kazekera, seeing that he had 
taken this too far, said "Don't worry- it was a joke, okay?"
"Thank god." Nobiyuki breathed "I'm sorry...after 
you get your house blown up a couple of times and 
have about seven people all paying rent in three 
different currencies, money worries kind of haunt your 
dreams."
Nobiyuki led Kazekera to the garage and the two 
men got in the car. Nobiyuki then started manoeuvring 
it out of the drive.
He could walk to his work most days, but today he 
was going to need to carry all his stuff back from work. 
Kazekera looked out of the car window, as it went 
through a complex 500 point turn, at the girls, who 
had moved into the garden. He appeared to be deep in 
thought.
"Hmmm."
"What is it, Kazekera?"
"It's just that I wish I had my pencils here."
"Why?"
"Ryoko is standing over there, see? And the light is 
falling on her. It really defines her breast."
"Ryoko's what!?"
"Oh, I think Ayeka's is very nice too, if that's 
what you mean. But she will sit in the shade- she's 
probably has sensitive skin, poor thing."
"Kazekera." Sighed Nobiyuki "Has anyone ever explained 
to you the use of cold showers?"
"No."
"Or jogging?"
"No."
"Well, then- how do you release tension?"
"Baths?"
"No...I mean..." Nobiyuki made gestures to try 
to show Kaz what he meant "...that kind of tension."
"Oh. Well, on my planet we have a thing called 
masturbating..."
Nobiyuki choked, not quite able to believe his ears.
"...if you don't have it here, it's quite a 
simple process. You just find somewhere quiet 
where you won't disturb anyone and then you..."
"No! No. It's okay, we have that here too. Quite 
prominently, in fact. Now let's change the subject, okay?"
"Why? Is there something wrong with me wanting 
to make sketches? Or mastur..."
"Not exactly." Nobiyuki cut him off and rattled 
the gear-stick of the car and they started off. 
"I mean, I suppose I'm not in any position to make 
judgements. I used to take photos..."
"So you are an artist too?"
"No one thinks those kind of photos are art."
"How odd. Photos of things of beauty on my planet 
are considered to be a very high art form."
"And people don't mind you taking them?"
"No, not really."
"Well I'm afraid it's very different on this planet. 
You only have to look at someone like you just looked at 
Ryoko to start trouble." 
"You mean they don't consider it a compliment? When 
someone 'eyes' them, I mean?"
"No."
"Oh dear. That's very disheartening. Where I lived, if 
you wanted to tell a girl you thought she was beautiful, 
the best way to do it was to examine her as she walked past. 
Then, if she was flattered or taken with you, she would 
pretend not to notice and pose for a photo or a drawing."
"Really?" Nobiyuki asked credulously.
"Yes." Kazekera assured him
"What about the men?"
"It worked both ways. But you must remember that 'girl' 
was just a term for the most feminine LOOKING people. 
Actual gender didn't come in to it. But I have had quite  
a few taken of me in the past. And I'm sure you...I'm sure 
everyone here...would get the same if you came along. 
They might even put some of the photos in the town centre."
"The what?" laughed Nobiyuki
"The town centre. It's a custom to put up the 
most beautiful photos in public places for a month 
before replacement."
"And who decides which ones should be put up?"
"The community. If someone thinks their photo is good 
enough, they ask around and get support. Once they 
have enough, they go and ask the Minster Responsible 
for Morale and Aesthetic Pleasure to put them up."
"Sounds fantastic."
"We are very lucky people. Nobiyuki. I have searched 
the universe and never found a place which is so 
relaxed. But we do have...other worries."
"Such as?"
"We're not really allowed to ask questions. We can't 
accept problems. We're all very self-doubting. That's 
why we don't travel much...well, one of the reasons why."
"I remember Ayeka telling me you were all very 
short-lived as well. She said you never lived more 
than 60 years out in space. "
"That's more of a rumour. Or perhaps a circumstantial 
bit of information."
"Well, I can't claim to understand exactly what you mean, 
but I'll take your word."
"Thanks."
They arrived at the office building where Nobiyuki had 
worked since he came to this town, and after he had 
vouched for Kaz and used his special pass-key, the 
ascended the stairs to the offices where he and his 
fellow architects did their bit for civilisation. 
Then Nobiyuki told Kazekera to wait outside his office. 
He also warned the Dryad that his secretary was a little 
jumpy.
"You might want to keep quiet. All you have to do is 
touch her hand and she screams and runs away."
"Why?"
"Well, a year ago she saw a videotape about 
Sexual Harassment in the work place just before she came 
here. Now she's a bit suspicious of things..."
Little did the two men know that the secretary 
could here everything the they were saying. She 
was in the broom cupboard directly opposite Nobiyuki's 
office. 
She was squatting and peering though a little panel 
of glass at about ground level. She did this often, since 
by doing so se could often peer clandestinely at Nobiyuki's 
rear as he got up to get coffee. She giggled slightly, but 
then bit her lip to stop.
"Did you just hear something?" said Nobiyuki, looking from 
side to side.
"Not much."
"Okay, then. Well, just be careful not to worry her. 
I don't think she entirely trusts me, so don't mention 
you're my guest."
"Oh no!" the tall bronze headed Dryad sounded very alarmed.
"What?" Nobiyuki replied, thinking something terrible had 
happened.
"How could she mistrust you? You are such an honest man!"
"Oh, is that all? People are strange, really. That's the 
only explanation I know of." Nobiyuki smiled "Just to keep 
safe, don't tell her."
"Hmmm...okay." Kazekera still didn't seem totally at ease.
"You just wait here, right?"
"Right."
Nobiyuki went off to his boss's office down the corridor, 
and he knocked on the door.
A voice from within answered.
"Come in."
He stepped into the office and saw his boss looking out if 
the window at the sprawling, modern city beneath. He turned 
round in his swivel chair and faced him.
His boss was only a little older than him, and they were 
more friends than co-workers since they had been in the 
company together from the beginning. He had been promoted 
on 'the peter principle', and over Nobiyuki only because 
Nobiyuki preferred a job without so much pressure. 
"What is it, Nobiyuki?"
His boss looked over at him, his grizzled and tanned face 
smiling expectantly. 
"Well, sir."
"Call me by my name, Nobiyuki. We've known each other 
long enough."
"Well, Oyaji There's not really any good time to say this 
but..."
"You love someone else?"  his Boss smiled kindly. 
Nobiyuki laughed.
"No, Oyaji. You've won my heart forever. But..." 
he paused "I need a change. I would like to tender my 
resignation."
His Boss's face became more serious.
"But why, Nobiyuki?" 
"I feel like I'm losing my way- we don't work on 
buildings like we did in the old days. I'd like to start 
architecture on my own."
"Well I see your point."
Oyaji reclined in his chair.
"However Nobiyuki, you are in luck- if you are willing to 
compromise, that is. I think we can come to a very good 
arrangement."
"How do you mean?"
"I'll come clean with you, Nobiyuki. As we get more 
accounting employees, we need a little office space. 
But we want to make as few layoffs as we can. And it would 
be in our greatest interests to keep such an experienced 
and able architect as yourself on the team."
"I see."
"So, we are arranging to have several employees working 
from home. And seeing as many upcoming contracts of ours 
do not require much skill..."
he boss sighed and looked over at the pictures of the new 
estates the company would be working on soon. 
Nobiyuki knew that his boss felt as bad as he did about 
these new projects. After all, he had been an architect 
like himself in the past.
"...those with sufficient ability will be able to 
'freelance' within the company, designing custom buildings 
for personal clients." 
"Eh...what?"
"Basically, we give you money to build houses for your 
friends and other people who come to you of their own free 
will and you design them however you want. But they will 
have to pay quite high prices, you understand."
"Yes..."
"Are you ready to undertake that kind of work?"
"Ready? It sound's like heaven!"
"It does, doesn't it?" Oyaji smiled at him.
"And my wage doesn't change?"
"No- in fact, if our new accounting guys enjoy their work 
as much as they have before, our stocks could rise and you 
could get a higher pay. Can you start this work now?"
"That would be wonderful."
"Great. You can clear out your stuff then, and say goodbye 
to everyone. Not that you've seen the last of us, you 
understand. We will have 'work-in' days and home meetings. 
Who knows- if we're lucky enough, or your unlucky enough- 
we may even have a meeting at your house."
"I hope we will some day." Nobiyuki imagined all of his 
co-workers being shocked out of their minds to see all 
the beautiful women who inhabited his house. It would be 
quite a conversation piece. 
Meanwhile, outside, Kazekera was still worried that his 
friend might have unresolved problems- if he left now, 
would his secretary go on thinking he was a 
'sexual harassment in the work place' (whatever that was)? 
It was never good to leave somewhere with bad feeling- 
Nobiyuki wouldn't have a chance to ever tell the secretary 
that he was sorry. 
So it was up to him. He had to stand up for his friend 
before he left his job. 
It was lucky then, at this point, that Miss Reiko Serubu 
(which was the secretary's name) happened to come out of the 
broom-cupboard and play straight into his hands (not 
literally of course- that WOULD be sexual harassment in the 
work place).
"Good afternoon, Miss."
"Hello. What can I do for you?"
In answer to this, Kazekera knelt down in the position 
of truth, and spoke to the secretary.
"Miss, I would like to assure you of something."
"Er...go ahead."
"Mr. Masaki is one of the most noble and honourable men 
I have ever met. He would never intentionally harm or 
upset anyone, least of all a charming lady like yourself. 
I think many people judge him wrongly...I would hate to 
think that you were one of those people."
She just stood there. This man had confused the living 
hell out of her, and she was not entirely sure what to 
make of it. It was lucky, therefore, that she decided 
not to try and find sense in it, but simply comfort. 
She just took these odd incidents as read.
"That's very kind." She said brightly "I hope I'm not. 
I always looked on Nobiyuki..." 
'...from inside the broom cupboard'  she added in thought
"...as a really nice guy..."
'...with a really nice...'  Kazekera stood up, or at 
least got into a less stooped position.
"That's wonderful." He said "Now if you will excuse me, 
I have to help him with some of his things."
He turned and left the secretary feeling oddly pleased. 
Even if she wouldn't be able to secretly look at Nobiyuki's 
bottom from her office any more, he at least knew what 
she thought of him. And she already knew what HE thought 
of HER. Her cheeks went red at this thought.
At this point Nobiyuki came out, grinning broadly. 
Miss Serubu quickly darted away to hide her blush. He 
explained to Kazekera what was happening and he explained to Nobiyuki 
about what he had done for his friend. Both of them were 
please.
In a minute, the two men were carrying all of Nobiyuki's 
designing equipment down the back stairs of the office 
to his car, with him smiling all the while about his 
amazing good luck. Then, after Nobiyuki had said aś 
revoir to his old friends at the company, they got into 
the car and headed back for home. 
Meanwhile, the girls had mostly gone out sunbathing, and 
so when Nobiyuki and Kazekera got back, no-one could hear 
the glad news. Still, Nobiyuki was still full of cheer 
and so he started cooking. After a while Yosho came in 
and they carried the meal on together. Another half hour 
passed, and Kaz was watching the T.V while doing one-handed 
press-ups, legs stretched out resting on different chairs. 
He was trying to sing between exercises, because the theme 
tune was one of his favourites. 
Tenchi came in from being chased by sunbathing girls, and 
saw him.
"...the powers was set free, oh..."
"Hey!" said Tenchi, for no discernible reason that Kazekera 
could see
"...captors! A mystic adventure...what?" he stopped to 
listen to his friend. 
"How do you DO that?"
"Er..." Kaz thought "...by...moving my lips?" he suggested.
"I'm mean...you...were SINGING the MUSIC?!" said Tenchi, 
with a bizarre combination of stressing and inflections. 
"What?"
"You were singing the words AND the music as well? 
How on Earth do you do that?"
Kazekera smiled as he thought.
"It's not perhaps, something you can do on Earth at all, 
Tenchi Runu."
"Why? How?"
"Well, another odd thing about Dryads is that we have 
two sets of vocal chords which work independently of 
each other. It was used to confuse predators when we 
were more animal like, and now we can sing without 
instruments. 
Quite an amazing little piece of evolution, don't you think?"
"Wow." Said Tenchi "You'd beat all of us into a shallow 
grave at Kareoke, I supposed." 
"You should here us singing together at our family reunions. 
All of my children sing loud enough to bring the house down!"
Tenchi thought he had known a lot about this Dryad. 
And he was getting shocked at a rate of one per minute. 
"You have children?"
"Oh, yes." (Who says Anime characters don't have 
commitments?- Jim)
"Er...with Mihoshi?"
"No. Not yet, unfortunately."
"Shouldn't they be here with you?"
"Well, on my planet single parents are quite common 
and they get enormous benefits from the community, 
so really it's much safer and more comfortable for 
them to live there with their mothers. Well, their 
maternal guardians."
"Don't you go to see them?"
Kazekera looked hurt.
"Yes, of course I do- I make a note to see all of 
them at least twice a year. Usually once for their birthdays"
"How many of them are there?"
"17 exactly."
"And you can remember all of their birthdays?"
"Not all of them- I have some written down."
"It's hard enough for me to even remember a couple...
what are they like? What are there mother's like?"
"Well, I think I could show you. Just wait a second."
Kazekera ducked under the doorway and went down to the lab. 
He came back with a brown photo album which, unlike Tenchi 
had expected, was not dusty at all and quite modern.
"Here you go, Tenchi Runu."
Tenchi turned the first page, where a legend was inscribed 
in Dryad script- the two rows of words meant to be spoken 
together.
"That means 'Family Reunion'" Kazekera explained
Tenchi looked at the first photo- it was Kazekera, in summer 
clothing, ruffling two little dryads who were on either side of 
him. One had very short cropped hair, the other had long 
golden hair.
"Those are Zek and Azek. Brother and sister from my fifth 
wife, Zella."
Tenchi flipped over again to see Kazekera feeding cake 
to a baby on his knee, which was beaming with joy. 
In the background two women, one tanned with dark hair and 
the other a green skinned she-dryad, were laughing and 
smiling at him
"That's Lunin" he pointed to the dark women 
"She's a Garamusu lady, and Keldra."
"Who are they?"
"My third and fourth wives respectively."
"Was it possible for you to have children with Lunin? When 
she wasn't a Dryad?"
"Oh,yes. We're similar enough. After all, Tenchi..." he 
winked 
"We're all mammals." 
(And The Blood Hound Gang starts playing 
in the background- Jim)
On the next page he saw Lunin and Keldra again, this time 
lined up in a state of giggling and half-falling-over, which 
lady friends often end up in, along with a golden skinned, 
golden haired Dryad and two other hammer Dryads, one with 
hair down to her ankles and a gem set into her forehead. 
She was slightly more well-covered that her companions.
"Are these all your wives?"
"Well, there are two who aren't here. They don't like 
being photographed."
"Who are these three?" Tenchi indicated the women he had not 
seen before.
"Oh, that's Zella..." said Kazekera "The gold haired one, 
and this is Reela, my first wife...and SHE"
He continued, pointing at a she-dryad with two peaks
in her light green hair and obsidian skin
"Is my seventh, Jayde " 
He gently took the album from Tenchi and looked at the photo.
"Ahhh...they are all so beautiful. I just wish Mihoshi 
could have been there that year."
"Where was she?"
"Here, I think."
"I'm sorry."
"What for?"
Tenchi was about to answer this question when Ayeka walked 
through the door.
She bowed when she saw them.
"Lord Tenchi, Mr. Kazekera."
"Hi, Ayeka."
"Good afternoon, your highness."
"What are you two doing."
"Kazekera is showing me photos of all his children. 
He has SEVEN wives!"
"Ah, I'm so glad you come from a normal community, 
Mr. Kazekera. In most places on the Earth, people 
consider it very rude to have more than one wife or husband."
"It's called bigamy." Said Tenchi sulkily.
"Hasn't it been said by some of Earth's comedians that the 
perfect marriage is one where neither partner is bothered by 
the other and can get on with there lives?"
replied Kazekera.
"Well, yes. Only in fun..."
"Can I see those photos?" asked Ayeka, for once ignoring 
Tenchi.
"Of course."
Kazekera leafed through the book to nearer the end
"These one at the back are the best."
He passed it to Ayeka. She saw him holding two twin 
babies in his lap, stroking their downy heads. They both 
appeared to be asleep, sucking their thumbs.
"Kawaii!" breathed Ayeka. It was a shock to her to see this 
hulking Dryad, who she still  
didn't entirely trust, being so gentle and kind.
"These are my most recent children." 
"What are they called?" Tenchi asked
"Well, they are probably the most unusually named of all my 
children. 
I christened them after some old friends..."
"Oh, that's so sweet!" said a voice behind them.
"What? Sesami? What are you doing here?"
Sesami had been there most of the time, it turned out. 
The little princess had had to go to fuse with Tsunami, 
and so she hadn't been in earlier. 
She was still a little dazed since the goddess was 
still a separate person- the two couldn't sense each 
other's thoughts completely for another 12 hours. 
When coming home, she had heard the 
theme tune to Kazekera's programme and come in to 
see it, but found these pictures much more interesting.
(Not quite as interesting as Tenchi had found Kazekera's 
hand drawings, though)
"Look at those two! They are so kawaii!"
Finally Kazekera reached the last photo - this was a 
whole double page of the book and it was all his children 
and his wives, with him in the middle holding his family 
crest. 
They had the names along the bottom in both standard 
galactic language and Dryad script.
"Whose that?" said Sesami, pointing to a very large 
man wearing white on the extreme right of the photo.
"That is my sixth wife. His name is Airin."
"How can he be your wife if he's a he?"
Kazekera shrugged.
"He held the babies."
All of the others sweat dropped.
"That just raises more questions!" said Tenchi plaintively.
The names along the bottom read 'top row- wives: 
Reela, Pironis, Lunin, <Kazekera> Keldra, Zella, Jayde, 
Airin' and 'bottom row-children:
Lela, Zerel, Pyrosis, Pyrokera, Kerri, Piro, Luze, Ka, Ra, 
Za, Zek, Azek, 'The Twins', Corin, Aaran, Kazerin'.
"Another Pyrokera in the family, I see." Said Tenchi.
"Yes- he was the god father to all of my and Pirionis' 
children."
They all stared harder at the photo. Kazekera surrounded by 
lots of little copies of himself- even the toddler seemed to 
have the little knot of hair which Kaz sported on his 
forehead.
"Who are 'The Twins'?"
"Ah, they are the two you saw me with before. Right then 
they were so young we didn't have names for them-in fact, 
it was only a couple of hours after this photo was taken 
that we finally decided what they should be called." 
"Oh! Let me see!" said Mihoshi, her head bobbing up behind 
Kazekera's shoulder.
"Miho-chan! You've seen these photos before, haven't you?"
"Yes, but I just love them so much!" she squeaked. 
"Especially the whole group one! And all your wives 
are so pretty. When can I meet them all?"
"Soon, Miho-chan, soon. They all ask the same question about 
you- I think Lunin only is the only one who has met you so 
far, isn't she?"
"Yeah! You introduced us on the Garumusu Plateaux! That was 
when you spent the whole summer walking around in that huge 
drape looking like a shower curtain!"
Kazekera's face sagged (a la all Anime shows. He also lost 
his nose for a second).
"Thanks Miho-chan. That will really get me respect from 
your friends."
They went on like this for a bit, but as it was near lunch 
time, people were beginning to assemble. As I mentioned 
before, Nobiyuki and Yosho were doing the cooking today, 
and that gave Sesami a break.
Ryoko came in, after having a little whispered conversation 
with Ayeka in the corridor, and sat down to see what all the 
fuss was about. Kiyone also came in, looking flustered and 
worried. 
"Hi, everyone." She said "What's going on?"
No body, particularly Mihoshi, answered her question, 
however this did not matter because Ayeka had started 
speaking, or rather holding forth (no comment) as she was 
want to do on these occasions. 
"Ah, I can still remember being a child. Playing in gardens 
similar to those in that photo...it was all perfect in the 
royal land of my family. That is, until one fateful day..."
The other's groaned inwardly, except perhaps Kazekera. 
Ayeka was going to tell them a bad-luck story from her past 
again, and there were no prizes for guessing who played the 
villain in it. For all they knew these stories could be 
planned in secret by the two girls, because it was SO 
predictably similar each time. In fact, Tenchi thought, 
he had seen them talking secretly a moment ago. 
Hmmm...
But with the start of these stories, all was forgotten and 
the album lay open at the photo of Kazekera and his two baby 
twins, with the legend 'Azaka and Kamadake' unnoticed 
underneath.
(N.B.: These stories are quite similar to two told in an 
episode of Tenchi Universe, but you know how things go. 
I didn't actually steal them, they are just similar.- Jim)

Ayeka was sitting in her family's land on Jurai, trying to 
find one of her father's knights to look after her and 
picking daises, when she saw a young, common girl kicking up 
some of the prettiest flowers in sight.
"What are you doing?" she had asked. The girl snapped 
round and smiled evilly.
"I'm DILEBERATLY destroying royal property! Bwahahahah!" 
said the girl, who Ayeka had now recognised as that Ryoko 
who had caused her so much heartache in the past.
"Well, I'm afraid I will have to report you for this." 
Said Ayeka.
The evil girl turned with a nasty look in her eye.
"HEY! You can't do that!" she said "At least...no 
without me stopping you!"
And so she grabbed Ayeka's daisy's and she and the 
little cabbit ran away, only pausing to destroy a 
plough of the royal Juraian farm hand's, which meant 
they would have to plough manually until a new one was 
ordered. 
 
"HEY! You can't do that!" said Ryoko
"What DO you mean, Ryoko? Everyone has a right to know how 
disgracefully you behaved."
"It didn't happen like that at all!"
"You dare accuse me of lying!"
"Ryoko, Ayeka, couldn't you just let it go this once..." 
started a voice of sanity. As usual in the Masaki household, 
it was completely ignored.. 
"Listen here, I'm not just sitting and taking this 
scandal!"
"Oh no..." said Tenchi "Please!" 
"Don't tell us what really happened, I don't think I 
could stand it!" cried Kiyone, burying her face in her hands.
"What I was doing was this..."
"Here we go again." Said the voice of sanity, again unheeded.  

Ryoko had been playing in 'her' garden- a secret spot, 
not actually on Jurai's royal land but near it. It was 
a beautiful dark area, where she could play and be shaded 
from the sun. She was knotting a daisy chain when, from 
behind her, the cross eyed, snobbish princess Ayeka had 
appeared.
"What are YOU doing here?" she shrieked at the poor Ryoko 
"This is MY family's land."
"I'm sorry...I...I..."
"What is that in your hand?" Ryoko looked down at the 
daisy's
"It's just some flowers I was..."
"How DARE you?! Picking flowers from Jurai's royal ground? 
You must do an acre of ploughing for this, and be grateful 
I didn't have you shot!"
And so Ryoko had to plough land on the Juraian royal farms 
for a week by hand, without payment. And the cruel princess 
didn't even let her have her daisy chain back...

"That was what REALLY happened." Ryoko finished, 
triumphantly.
"How DARE you?!" retorted Ayeka  "Your lying will mean the 
death of you, Ryoko!"
"Me lying? Can't anyone here see that mine is PLAINLY the 
truth? Well?"
Everyone scratched their chins and sweatdropped. 
"Hmmm. They both seem so REAL." Said Mihoshi.
Kazekera raised an eyebrow (N.B: However, he did not say 
'Can you smell what the Dryad is cooking?'-Jim) 
"The simple explanation is that they are both being very 
naughty and lying."
He said
"What?" Both the Space Pirate and The Princess turned on 
him with a look of thunder in their eyes and lightening in 
their elegant hands.
"Well, what actually happened was this..."

Kazekera had been given the task of look after the young 
princess for a while, but at a safe distance, and both the 
little girls had been outside Jurain royal land on a 
kind of exploring trip. They met each other in a wooded 
clearing, and as he watched, they started to talk.
"Hello again." Said Ayeka, recognising her companion 
from somewhere 
"Are you one of my people?"
"I don't think so." Replied Ryoko, picking a flower and 
knotting it together. "Why would I be?"
"Well, I AM the princess of Jurai, you know."
They stopped talking for a minute, each trying to remember 
where they had met before.
"What're you making there?" asked the Princess.
"Daisy chain."
"Ooo. Can I have a look?"
"Yes- just wait a minute."
Ryoko finished knotting.
"Can you make these?"
"No. I never learned."
"Well, here you go." Ryoko passed it over to her purple 
haired friend. But as she did so, it caught in her sleeve, 
and as Ayeka pulled it, it snapped into two pieces. 
Ryoko was shocked and upset, but no less that Ayeka.
"Look what you did!" stormed the young Pirate
"I didn't mean it!" Ayeka was quick to her own defence. 
"You broke it on purpose!"
"How dare you! I'll report you!"
"You can't do that!"
"Oh, yes I can- I'm the princess of Jurai!"
"Now I remember you! You made me cry at the carnival! 
Snobby princess prissy-pants!"
"You made ME cry! Horrible, mean common girl!"
Ryoko then snatched the broken chain back from Ayeka, 
and she burst into tears. Not to be outdone, Ryoko also 
burst into louder tears. Soon a kindly observing Jurai 
Knight came to separate them and show them both the Juraian 
farm workers practising ploughing by hand in the fields. 

"How did you know that?" Ayeka and Ryoko started, but 
then thought again and shut up.
"What were you doing on Jurai's private land?" 
Ayeka tried. She was extremely shocked and angry 
at the Dryad for spoiling her and Ryoko's 
delicate tissue of sympathy inducing lies.
"I...I... was in your father's employment at the time." 
Replied Kazekera, guardedly. 
"Doing what exactly?" Ayeka rose to her feet. 
"Do you know that attempting to gain access 
to Jurai's royal land is a violation of the 
law, Mr. Kazekera?"
her personal anger had turned to righteous 
indignation for her family.
"I was honoured to hold quite an important 
position, my lady." He replied, still elusive.
"What...did...you...DO?" 
The young princess (if you can call 500 years 
old young) was getting very upset indeed. It could 
only be a matter of time before the sparks started 
to fly- literally.
But just then two large, oaken apparitions appeared 
in the house , behind their commanding monarch. 
Azaka and Kamadake had decided to bring a little 
light to proceedings- and not just by flashing when 
they spoke. (I knew a guy who flashed when he 
spoke...I think he's in prison now.-Jim)
"I think we can help here."
"We know what Kazekera was doing for your family, Princess."
"He held the high position..." started Azaka
"...of Jurai Knight." His companion finished for him.
Now everyone was confused. 
"That is why we let him into the house, Princess."
"It is customary to honour the wishes of another 
Jurai Knight."
"He said we should fight him a little to make it look 
real."
"WHAT?"  Washu screeched. 
She was in the know, and she was going to show it.

THE END

Oooo...it's all so exciting, isn't it?
What will Washu do to punish Kazekera?
Was he really a Jurai Knight?
Are Ayeka and Ryoko really fooling?
Find out in the next confusingly 
titled epsiode of Tenchi O-Rusuta©: Kazekera!
Yrs.
Jim 'Diabolo' Moore
comageddon@ntlworld.com
or
jetset@ntlworld.com