Legal Disclaimer: Tenchi Muyo! and all associated characters are owned by AIC and Pioneer LDC. Seion Makibi, the Tokimian Knights, the Amatora, Planet Amano, and the Nexus Mercenaries are my own creations based opon the Tenchiverse. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ************************************************************************************************ CUE OPENING CREDITS SONG:"Boku wa moto Pioneer" by Chisa Yokoyama(with much the same look as OVA2 opening but including Kiyone, Seion, Demi, The Knights, Nagi, Misaki, Megumi and all those adorable little cabbits. SCENE: The Masaki residence. Outdoors. The gang is playing football. They wear the following jerseys: Girls Team Guys team Ryoko-Buccaneers #69 Tenchi-Browns #4 Aeka-Vikings #7 Seion-Bengals #77 Nagi-Raiders #66 Asaka-Colts #54 Washu-Chiefs #58 Yosho-same old outfit Kiyone-Eagles #1 Noboyuki-Cowboys #12 Megumi-Jets #00 Kamadake-Chargers #54 Demi-Lions #20 Keiichi-Seahawks #80 on the sidelines Sasami-Dolphins #13 Tsunami-Dolphins #26 Misaki-Dolphins #52(Misaki thought it would be so KAWAII if they all wore the same team) Mihoshi-Cardinals #36(the 36 seems to be the wrong size for Mihoshi because the numbers are.....never mind) The guys are losing 77-21. Noboyuki is the QB. NOBOYUKI: HIKE! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ SFX: Eeeeeeeeeeoooo! EPISODE 36: NO NEED FOR BABY! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ (NOBOYUKI IS SACKED BY KIYONE....again. The guys huddle to discuss their next course of action) SEION: THAT'S SEVEN TIMES KIYONE HAS SACKED YOUR WORTHLESS ASS! NOBOYUKI: Hey now! Don't blame me. I'm sure we'd all like to be taken down by her- SEION: THAT'S MY SISTER!(to Tenchi) And you! 6 turnovers! And that last one you HANDED to Aeka! And Asaka. Kamadake. I thought you two were above letting the girls win just for a little action later on! 3 fumbles each! And I know Megumi isn't strong enough to strip the ball! KAMADAKE: It's not the ball I want her to strip.(smiles) TENCHI: You'd run over your own sister over to win, wouldn't you? SEION: I already did five times! I scored three touchdowns! NOBOYUKI: C'mon! It's only a game! SEION: This is no longer a game! It's a crusade! I- KIYONE:(offscreen) HURRY UP! You're on the clock!(The break the huddle) SEION: Get me the ball!(meanwhile, on the girls side) RYOKO: What should we do this time? AEKA: I think I'll occuppy Lord Tenchi while you run the ball in for the score. RYOKO: Sounds like a plan to me! Nagi, you cover Seion! NAGI: WHAT?!! He's a madman! WASHU: Don't worry! It'll work out! Kiyone ain't gonna blitz this time so Mr. Masaki'll be free to pass to Seion and Tenchi. NAGI: I hope you're right. NOBOYUKI: HIKE!(The play starts. Noboyuki throws a perfect pass to Tenchi. Seion is running a block for him. Seion then sees Nagi, gets a devilish grin on his face, and does a flying shoulder block into Nagi.) SASAMI: AND LOOK AT HIM GO! MIHOSHI: HE COULD GO... MISAKI: ALL.... TSUNAMI: THE... SASAMI: WAY!(Just then we see something at the goaline that might stop Tenchi from scoring.... Aeka and Ryoko.) Or maybe not! RYOKO: Hand it over. AEKA: Yes, Lord Tenchi. Why would you ever want to handle something made from such rough skin when you can caress my perfect skin?(Tenchi drops the ball. Ryoko picks it up and takes off) SEION: NOOOOOOOOO! NOT THIS TIME!(Seion dives at Ryoko's feet and grabs them. Problem is Ryoko is flying and dragging Seion down field) YOU-(Ryoko boots him in the face)-OW! AIN'T(Kick!) ARGH! GONNA(Stomp!) D'OH! SCORE-(Heel smash) OUCH! THIS TIME!(And with that Seion digs his feet in and applies the brakes, finally stopping Ryoko) Heh-heh! I stopped you just short of the goaline!(Then Ryoko points out that even though he stopped her just short of the line, the ball was well across the line, thus resulting in another touchdown for the girls) D'OH! D'OH! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ SCENE 2: The Masaki House The phone rings. Tnechi picks it up. TENCHI: Hello? Hey, Junko! How you been doing. I'm fine. Will I what? I'd like to, but me, dad, grandpa, and a few friends are going to play some golf today. Well, there are a few girls living in the house with us. Who are they? Uh....just a few college students and Dad's fiance. I'm sure they'd love to help out. Well, when will you be hear? Your coming up the driveway now? I see you two have a carphone now. Alright, I'll let them know. See you in a minute. Bye. (He hangs the phone up.) GIRLS! I have a suprise for you! (Out of the blue, Aeka, Ryoko, Sasami, Washu, Mihoshi and Misaki appear.) AEKA: Is it flowers? RYOKO: A bottle of sake? MISAKI: An engagment ring for my Little Aeka? WASHU: That sample I've been trying to get? SASAMI: I hope it's candy! MIHOSHI: Me too! TENCHI: No, it's something else. Something you'll like even better. (Seion enters the room) SEION: You must mean me. TENCHI: NO I DIDN'T! RYOKO: Well, what is it then? (And with that question there is a knock at the door. Nagi goes to answer it.) NAGI: Yes, who is it? (Just then diapers, bottles, baby formula, toys, baby clothes, car seat, and baby blanket appear in Nagi's arms.) JUNKO: Well, I think that's everything! Wait a minute. What am I forgeting, Hamato? HAMATO: Let me see....... JUNKO&HAMATO: TARO! (Tenchi and Seion come to the door) SEION: What in the world is a Taro? (Junko hands Tenchi said Taro) TENCHI: Taro is my baby cousin. SEION:(with a terrified look on his face) A ba-...a ba- JUNKO: No, not a ba. A baby. SEION: A BABY?!! AAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHH! (and with a cloud of dust, Seion dissappears.) JUNKO: What's with the big guy? TENCHI: I think we finally found something he's afraid of. HAMATO: Huh. Well, we'll be off. See you later. TENCHI: When will you be back? JUNKO: Tomorrow evening sometime. Bye now!(she kisses Taro) Bye my little angel. (Junko and Hamato get in their car and head off. Tenchi walks back in the house with Taro in his arms and goes to wherethe girls are.) TENCHI: Here's the suprise. AEKA: Oh! How sweet! A baby! RYOKO: A ba- TENCHI: No, not a ba. A baby. RYOKO: A BABY?!! ARRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!(Ryoko heads for her rafter. From the rafter a scuffle is heard) RYOKO: HEY! What are you doing on my rafter? SEION: I was here first! RYOKO: But it's my rafter! SEION: I don't see your name on it! RYOKO: It's carved right here! SEION: Oh, so your full name is Ryoko N. Tenchi? RYOKO: BAKA! (and down comes Seion) SEION: (looks at Taro) AAAHHHHH! (and with another cloud of dust, he's gone.) SASAMI: Oh boy! A little baby! What's his name? TENCHI: Taro. MISAKI: Taro-chan? Can I hold him? TENCHI: Uh, I'm not sure if...(she takes him anyway) MISAKI: (in ultra-Kawaiiese) How is my widdle Taro-chan? You are just so KAWAII! One of the most kawaii babies I've ever seen! SASAMI: Even more than me, mommy? MISAKI: Don't be silly, Sasami-chan! Nobody was ever as kawaii as you were when you were just a widdle baby! I'll go get the baby pictures!(she hands Taro to Aeka) Here. Practice being a mommy! Be back in a little while!(she leaves to go retrieve the 36 baby picture albums.) AEKA: Hello, Taro-chan. My name is Aeka. TARO: Da-da! AEKA: DA-DA! No, I'm not your father! TENCHI: Don't worry, Aeka. It's the first sound all babies make. AEKA: Oh, thank goodness. (Kiyone and Noboyuki enter the room) KIYONE: ...And remeber to call me at work if you are going to be late tonight, alright Dear? NOBOYUKI: I will. You can- Well! Look who's here! It's Taro! KIYONE: Who's Taro?(She then see's the little tike) Oh! How sweet! A baby! TENCHI: Yeah. I was hoping that the girls would want to take care of them today. KIYONE: Not today! We're getting that shipment of pointsettas in today for Christmas. You boys will have to stay here today and do it.(and with that remark, Seion appears.) SEION: Like hell we are! As eldest male in the Makibi Clan I say that I'm going to play golf! KIYONE: And as the eldest female in the Makibi Clan I say you're STAYING! SEION:...yes ma'am. Let's go put our clubs up, guys. (As Tenchi and Noboyuki trudge upstairs, Seion stops and whispers something containing the word "distraction" in Mihoshi's ear and then follows his soon-to-be in-laws.) MIHOSHI: Um, excuse me! Can I say something? WASHU: What is it, Mihoshi? MIHOSHI: Well, you remember when we were in the Academy and we had to take care of a baby? Well we...(As Mihoshi distracts away we see Asaka and Kamadake outside the window catching golf bags.)But we didn't have any milk so we had to.. (Tenchi then goes by the window downwards and lands on his feet and heads for the van.) And then, and then we had to change her diapers, so we... (Seion then appears and lands on his hands and springs to the van.) And she just wouldn't go to sleep so I started singing... (Noboyuki just falls and lands in the shrubbery.)..I float, I sway,/ in my sleep /Over the slumberland you know,/ the happiness lies...(As Yosho helps him out, Kiyone comes to the window and yells to her brother.) KIYONE: SEION MAKIBI! YOU'RE A DEAD MAN! WASHU: Well, Misaki, Nagi and I can look after the little one until you get back! AEKA: Oh! But I want to spend the day with him! Can we take him to work with us? MIHOSHI: Come on Kiyone, let's do it! KIYONE: No. MISAKI: You know you want to, Kiyone! KIYONE: I told you. We're going to be really busy today! SASAMI: Please? KIYONE: ABSOLUTLEY NOT! (the scene shifts to the flower shop where ALL of the girls, including Megumi and Demi, are helping out.) How did I let myself get talked into this?(she then looks at Taro and finds her answer) SCENE 3: GOLF! Everyone is dressed for golf, which means the only change to Yosho's outfit is golf shoes. SEION: So...Who goes first? TENCHI: Dad, then me, then Grampa, then you. NOBOYUKI: Outta the way, son. Let me show you how to play this game.(Noboyuki lines up his shot, swings, and send his ball over the sand trap, clears the water hazard, and places it 50 yrds from the green.) SEION: Ooooo! So close! You're turn Tenchi. (Tenchi takes his shot, just edging the water) YOSHO: Hmm. You need more practice, Tenchi. Let me show you how. (Yosho's shot is a great shot....if you're trying to intentionally put your ball in the bunker) TENCHI: Nice shot, Grampa. Your turn, Seion SEION: Let me show you how to drive a ball!(Seion crushes the ball, sending it 100 yrds past the green into the trees) Game's over. I win. (the other three just start looking around, not saying anything) What? +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ SFX: Eeeeyoooo! (wood blocks) (picture of Ryo-oki and Ken-oki in ship form bumping into each other) ===================================================== COMMERCIAL BREAK SCENE: Ryoko sitting on the rooftop RYOKO: Freedom. One of our most basic rights. We take it for granted. Our government gives us the freedom to religion, the freedom of press,and the freedom of free speech. Yet that freedom can be taken away by the very government that provides it. Something to think about from the people at...(She pulls out a VERY large and VERY empty sake bottle) the people at...(looks at the bottle closely) The people at...(Looks at it again) The people who make thish wonderffful shake in thish little bottle.(She passes out.) DIRECTOR: CUT! Get her off the set! Bring the other actress in(Seion walks into the scene, picks Ryoko up, puts her over his shoulder, and takes her off the set. Tenchi and Aeka bring the next actress in, one Misato Katsuragi. As Seion sets Ryoko down next to the first actress to get blasted on the set, Ayaka Kisuragi to be exact, he pulls out a Snickers bar.) ANNOUNCER: Not going anywhere for a while? Grab a Snickers. MISATO: WHOOOOO-HOOOO! This is some good sake! ===================================================== SFX:Eeeeyoooo!(wood blocks) (picture of the cabbits with a bunch of carrots slung over Ken-oki's back) +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ SCENE 4: The Flower Shop. "Misato's Theme" is playing in the backround over the sound system. Kiyone, Nagi, Mihoshi, and Misaki are in the back with Taro. They are looking through the photo albums. MISAKI: And this was Sasami when she first starting crawling! Isn't she so cute? KIYONE: Hey! The two girls in this picture with Aeka look familiar. NAGI: D-don't be silly! They look like two normal, average, unknown girls to me. MIHOSHI: Kiyone's right! That girl there looks just like Ryoko! And this one looks like you, Nagi! KIYONE: Nagi? You're right! It IS Nagi and Ryoko! Did you know this, Misaki! MISAKI: Sure! Aeka and Ryoko used to be best friends until they got into a fight over who stole who's flower wreath. To tell the truth, Nagi made it but just left it on the ground. Aeka picked it up and wrore it like she was already the Queen! Oh, it was just so cute to see her giving out royal proclomations and claiming land in the name of Jurai! NAGI: Great! Now everyone knows that Ryoko's my little sister! MIHOSHI: Ryoko's your sister? (just then, Sasami burst into the room) SASAMI: Kiyone! The delivery truck's here! KIYONE: I'll be right out, Sammy! You take your allergy medicine, Mihoshi? MIHOSHI: Sure did! Let's go! MISAKI: Oooo! Are they pretty flowers? KIYONE: I'll say they are. MISAKI: I'll come and help arrange them! Ikebana is a hobby of mine! KIYONE: Thanks! Nagi, Could you look after Taro until we're done? NAGI: I guess. KIYONE: Thanks.(they leave) NAGI: (looking over her shoulder to make sure nobody is watching and then talking to Taro) How is my little iddy, biddy Taro? You are so cute! Yes you are! Got your nose! Got your nose! Heh-heh!(Taro is making baby noises as if he's enjoying himself) Here's something you might like! (Nagi cups her mouth over Taro's tummy and begins blowing out, making that sound that we all know. Nagi does this a few times, getting baby laughter each time, until she just freezes, realizing that someone is watching her. Ryoko and Aeka are at the door recording the whole thing) RYOKO: Look. It's big, bad Nagi, the toughest bounty hunter who ever lived. AEKA: My, my. I never thought I would ever see her put on such a spectical. NAGI: It's not how it looks. AEKA: It looks like you where playing with Taro and having a little fun while doing it. NAGI: Oh, so it is how it looks. SCENE 5: MORE GOLF! Tenchi is adding up the scores TENCHI: Let's see now...Dad is at -2, I'm at 2 over, Grampa's at 5 over, and Seion is at an amazing 23 over. SEION: See, I'm winning. I've got 23 points! TENCHI: The idea is to have the LOWEST score! The sad part is it's only the front 9! SEION: You mean that your loser at every sport he ever tried father is kicking our asses and we ain't even half done? NOBOYUKI: Well, I am our prefeture's amature golf champion over the past seven years. SEION: Shut up! SCENE 6: Back at the Shop The Miho-Misa (tee-hee) are trying to feed Taro in Kiyone's office. MIHOSHI: Come on! You need to eat, Taro! Why won't you take your bottle!(Looks to Misaki) Why won't he take his bottle? MISAKI: Well how should I know? MIHOSHI: I thought you were a mommy! MISAKI: I am Queen of Jurai. I had servants to help with the feeding and the cleaning! The only time I ever fed my little girls is when I was- TARO: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! (Kiyone enters the room) KIYONE: What's wrong with him now? MIHOSHI:(crying along with Taro) He won't take his bottle! MISAKI: (crying also) And we don't know why! KIYONE: Let me see that.(Kiyone checks the temperature bottle and turns ice blue) IT'S F-f-f-freezing! Go heat this up in the microwave for a a minute. He needs it at-(Kiyone gets a shocked look on her face and then starts blushing. She then looks down at Taro and see's that he is trying to "nurse" on his very own).....about 98.6 degrees. And please hurry. MISAKI: That's what I did to feed my little girls, Kiyone. You look so natural with a child. You'd make a great Mommy! Have you had experience raising children? MIHOSHI: Uh, Kiyone. How long do I heat it up? KIYONE: You could say that, Misaki. SCENE 7: GOLF MUYO! The 18th hole! TENCHI: And the scores coming up to the last hole are, Dad at 5 under, Me at 2 over, Grampa at 3 over, and Seion at an astonishing 36 over par! SEION: If you keep it up I'm gonna break my driver off on your Royal ass! NOBOYUKI: Just drive the ball, Seion. SEION: Yeah, yeah, yeah.(Seion drives the ball...right into the lake. Seion turns red, grinds his teeth, and starts fuming) I HATE THIS STUPID-ASS GAME! (he then flings his club far down the golf course. Meanwhile...at the 18th green, Ranma, Akane, Mousse, and Shampoo are gathered around two balls) RANMA: HA! All I have to do is make this putt and I win, which means Shampoo is still mine! AKANE: Stupid jerk! I hope you screw it up so bad! MOUSSE: Mr. Perfect? Screw up? SHAMPOO: It never happen. RANMA: Just shut up and watch.(As Ranma lines up his shot, a familiar looking club comes flying in and clobbers the greatest martial artist is Japan right in his arrogant noggin, Knocking his out cold and knocking Mousse's ball in for the win.) SHAMPOO: Stupid looser Ranma! Shampoo have nothing more to do with you! Let's go, Mousse. (They step on Ranma's carcass as the leave.) AKANE: Get up! You sexist pig! You're gonna get it when we get back home!(She grabs him by the collar and drags him off.) SCENE 8: Back at home. Noboyuki and Kiyone are in their room talking about their day. NOBOYUKI: ...Seion knocked out some pig-tailed guy on the last hole. But I fininshed at six under. It was the best round I played in my life. So, was Taro a problem for you? KIYONE: Oh no! He was just wonderful. Washu was a great help today. She knew just about everything to do at the shop. But Taro got me to thinking. NOBOYUKI: About what? (Kiyone embraces Noboyuki, forces him down on the bed and kisses him about his face) You're being real amourous tonight. What's the occasion? KIYONE: I want a baby! SCENE 8: Ae&Ryo's room. Ryoko and Aeka are passed out from fatigue. Aeka is sitting up on the couch. Ryoko has her head in Aeka's lap. Taro is crying. MIHOSHI: (offscreen down the hallway) Don't forget my Cherry-Chocolate Ice cream! SEION: I won't. Be back in a jiff!(Seion goes by the door and see's the scene) Oh boy.(he eneters the room) Just look at you two.(He picks Ryoko up and puts her to bed) You're trying so hard to be good mothers, but you missing a father to give you a break once in a while.(He puts Aeka to bed) But at least you are trying. (he looks to Taro) And now for you. What's all the fuss about? Please don't tell me it's the diaper. (He checks) Thank heavens! And you don't seem to be hungry. You must want someone to put you to sleep. You need music. (he reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small crystal flute and starts playing that music that plays when Ryoko is talking about Tenchi when he was growing up from the OVA series. Little does he know that Mihoshi, Kiyone, Tenchi and Sasami are at the door watching him) TENCHI: (whispering) Did you know he could play a flute? MIHOSHI: No. This is the first time I've seen him do it. KIYONE: He's been playing for years. Mom taught both of us. SASAMI: You really are a lucky girl to have a guy like him, Mihoshi. MIHOSHI: Thank you, Sasami. SEION: (to himself) Yes, thank you, Princess. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ FADE TO BLACK ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 88888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888 ENDING SONG: "Washu's Lullabye" by the Girls. Tenchi...........................................Masami Kikuchi Ryoko............................................Ai Orikasa Aeka.............................................Yumi Takada Sasami...........................................Chisa Yokoyama Kiyone&Megumi....................................Yuri Amano Mihoshi..........................................Yuko Mizutani Washu............................................Yuko Kobayashi Nagi.............................................Mizue Otsuka Ryo-oki..........................................Etsuko Kozakura Ken-oki..........................................Akiko Yajima Yosho and Noboyuki...............................Takeshi Aono Seion............................................Tetsuya Iwanaga Demi.............................................Tomo Sakurai Written by.......................................Patrick M. Stewart. """"""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""" CUE NEXT EPISODE MUSIC SASAMI: So what were you guys like when you where my age? TENCHI:(in a ten year olds voice) In the next episode, Washu tries a little experiment that makes alot of us into ten-year olds. When Kiyone and Dad get home, they are in for a bit of a shock. SEION: Rules? I don't need no STOOPID rules! ASAKA: TENCHI! It's your turn to play and loose to me! WASHU: Well, Kiyone. You did say you wanted kids of your own. KIYONE: Not like this! WASHU: Escuuuuuuuse me! KIYONE: Just watch Episode 37: No Need for Rascals! @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ Notes: 1. After Brazil gave me a review and a little CONSRTUCTIVE critisism, I've done a little reworking of my fic's format to make it look a little better. I hope you like it! 2. Just who are all these new characters? If you haven't read the first few Eps do so now. 3. Visit my website at http://home.earthlink.net/~alliemae for website banners and more. 4. If you wanna know what Seion looks like, just let me know by Email and I can send you a copy of his picture and his stats. Seion can be reached at alliemae@mail.earthlink.net. Don't flame me or my fic. If you do you will get nuked back. Smile for the nice people Sasami -----> (^-^) "Curse the handsome devil that I am! I'm always one step ahead of myself!" --Seion Makibi