Author: Mike Fenton Title: AFS #13 (PARADOX SILLINESS) Notes: Regular (OVA), script format Summary: Nonsense and mayhem galore, followed by attempts at pithiness. [Disclaimer: Tenchi Muyo! and its characters are the property of AIC and Pioneer LDC, Inc. and was created by Masaki Kajishima. This story comes entirely from my imagination, and is strictly intended to be apocryphal--so please don't sue me.] 1 EPIGRAM: "Should you desire the great tranquility, prepare to sweat white beads." --Zen Master Hakuin 2 EXT. OLD MASAKI HOUSE SITE The old construction from the previous episode is nothing more than fragments of wooden beams, joists, piles of glass and charred material of several varieties. Part of the old greenhouse is still intact--although the plants have mostly been removed. Most of the rose bushes still remain intact, as well as the old walkway--currently being disassembled by Tenchi and Noboyuki. 3 EXT. WALKWAY Tenchi and Noboyuki are hammering out the planks of the old walkway, moving northward toward the front gate. TENCHI: I forgot how big the old house was. NOBOYUKI: Yeah, it was a monster. I don't know what I was thinking. Tenchi wipes away sweat from his face. TENCHI: It looked like the old house was confused. 'I'm not sure what I want to be,' it was saying. NOBOYUKI: (a little wistful) I thought it would last forever. I tell you, Tenchi, it was doomed from the start. Tenchi starts on another plank. TENCHI: It was? Noboyuki continues to hammer. NOBOYUKI: There's nothing more dangerous than having it all. This next house is just going to be a house. Period. TENCHI: (chuckling) It already looks like a fortress. 4 EXT. HILLSIDE The new house embraces the side of a hill--like it was partly planted into the hill itself (which it was). The earth at the front has been raised, and the back of the house is clearly sitting at least ten feet below the ground level--cut-in. A fresh path runs from the entrance, curving its way into the forest about fifty feet or so down the hill, then meets up with the road going by the crop fields. The house itself is similar to the first house in design--its overall layout is roughly the same--but the new windows are more horizontal and unified. The angle of the roof is a bit steeper, though the house appears much lower. From the balcony to the ground on one side is about six feet, and about twenty feet on the other. 5 INT. MAIN HALL The original plan for the main hall has returned--the most noticeable missing element being the broom closet. Another thing missing is the original sofa and coffee table. The dining table, though, is identical to the original. Ayeka and Sasami are sitting at the table, having tea, wearing outfits that look as if they had been rejected by the homeless. (Ayeka looks like a giant banana, and Sasami has on a loud green and blue combination.) Mihoshi is also sitting at the table, looking her usual self, as well as Ryoko--who is a bit more cheerful, perhaps. RYOKO: Hey, is it okay for me to fly around again? MIHOSHI: Uh... I think so. I didn't see any camera crews on the way in. RYOKO: (celebrating) All right! Ryoko bounces off a couple of walls, then returns to a more dignified floating position, near Ayeka. RYOKO: What a relief! I haven't been off the ground since Sasami burned the house down. AYEKA: You liar! You've been floating around several times. I saw you! MIHOSHI: And it wasn't Sasami that burned down the house. RYOKO: (snorting) Oh, sure. Ayeka glances at Sasami--who looks a little petrified. AYEKA: (reassuring) Don't you listen, Sasami. The fire was accidental. It was not your fault. SASAMI: (softly) I know. But that's not what's bothering me. Ryoko floats a little closer, and Ayeka tries to shoo her away, briefly. AYEKA: It isn't? Sasami, what's on your mind? SASAMI: It's just like the old house was. I mean, it's different, but it feels very similar. It's giving me the creeps. RYOKO: (a little disdainful) Yeah? So? AYEKA: (really annoyed, to Ryoko) Can't you fly elsewhere?! MIHOSHI: (somber) I really missed the old house. RYOKO: (chuckling) No, but that explosion your shuttle made sure nailed it! AYEKA: (stifling a smile) How rude-- Ryo-Ohki appears in cabbit form and scampers up to Sasami, sitting on her shoulder and rubbing cheeks. Ryoko slowly stops chuckling. RYOKO: Geez. Now, I'm getting the creeps. 6 TITLE: "EPISODE 13: PARADOX SILLINESS" 7 EXT. WALKWAY Tenchi and Noboyuki are about halfway over the lake, sitting at the edge of their work. A figure with blonde hair wearing a martial arts uniform approaches from the other end, holding a practice sword. NOBOYUKI: Who is that? TENCHI: I have no idea. The wind picks up as the figure approaches, and Tenchi slowly recognizes her. The figure is Lilian, casually smirking. TENCHI: (a little disconcerted) That's strange. It's Dotty. NOBOYUKI: (turning to Tenchi) Who? Tenchi stands, his eyes fixed ahead. TENCHI: You remember? She contracted out some construction, but the engineers pulled the plug on that site. Something about the groundwater. Noboyuki slowly stands. NOBOYUKI: Hmm... Nope. Never heard of it. News to me. Lilian stops and makes a short bow, still holding the sword over her shoulder. LILIAN: Good day. I hope I'm not interrupting anything. TENCHI: Well, actually-- NOBOYUKI: We were just going to take a lunch break. Right, Tenchi? TENCHI: (a little surprised) Huh? NOBOYUKI: (smiling at Lilian) Hello. Your name is Dotty, right? I'll be at the house, if anyone needs me. LILIAN: (very confused) Uh-- Noboyuki strolls off, leaving Lilian alone with Tenchi. LILIAN: Sorry, but I have no idea what he just said. TENCHI: (chuckling) That's okay. I'll interpret. He just said that it was nice to meet you. LILIAN: Oh. In that case, I'll ask you to convey my thanks. Now, then... TENCHI: You seem to be dressed for a workout. LILIAN: I was told I could meet a teacher for some fencing. I was also told that that person was you. TENCHI: (confused) A teacher? Who told you that? Lilian casually folds her arms over the sword. LILIAN: Some old man by the name of Katsuhito. I met him through a mutual friend of ours. I believe you already know Sammy? TENCHI: (frowning) Yeah. LILIAN: (glaring at Tenchi) He told me that this teacher's name was Tenchi Masaki. I said to myself, 'You know, that sounds familiar.' TENCHI: (smiling wryly) I think I see. So, Grandpa wants me to train you? LILIAN: (pondering) Well... Not exactly. TENCHI: (confused again) Huh? LILIAN: (smiling grimly, as she brandishes the sword) Oh, you'll see. Lilian charges at Tenchi--who flails for a moment, then drops into the water. Tenchi pulls himself up to the surface, then glares back at Lilian from the water-- splashing some water at her (which she deftly avoids). TENCHI: What was that for?! LILIAN: You weren't meant to actually train me-- just teach me. Tenchi grabs onto the edge of the walkway, and Lilian helps pull him up. TENCHI: What do you mean by that? LILIAN: (smiling) Let's just say for now that you're my sparring partner. Tenchi sits at the edge of the walkway, scowling. TENCHI: Great. 8 EXT. MASAKI HOUSE Noboyuki goes around to the front. He considers, then shakes his head. NOBOYUKI: I need to get a nice patio out here again. 9 INT. MAIN HALL Ryoko is lying on a support beam, and Ayeka is watching from the table, as Sasami confronts a couple of reporters-- one holding a video camera. SASAMI: There wasn't as much damage as we thought. Most of the material was used to rebuild. Noboyuki enters, and warmly greets the reporters. NOBOYUKI: Oh, hello! I'm very glad to see you! My name is Noboyuki Masaki. I'm an architect. The first reporter seems annoyed. NOBOYUKI: (gesturing) This house was designed by me, of course. It isn't as elaborate as the old place, but I always say, simpler is better. Feel free to shoot wherever you wish. FIRST REPORTER: (casual) That's very kind of you. We're from Channel X. Isn't there a story other than this house? NOBOYUKI: (confused) Weren't you here about the house? I'm afraid it's pretty boring around here, besides the project. SECOND REPORTER: (lowering the camera) I thought we were going to get some interesting shots. FIRST REPORTER: (very annoyed) Stupid rumors! NOBOYUKI: Don't you want to get pictures? Let me show you around, at least. 10 EXT. HIGH OVERHEAD Ryoko appears and enters the floating onsen, just as the reporters continue down the hill, still being pestered by Noboyuki. They are apparently unaware of the onsen. 11 EXT. WALKWAY Lilian is sitting with the sword in her lap, as Tenchi wrings out his shirt. LILIAN: I've been fencing since I could hold a sword. So, don't feel too bad about it. TENCHI: I don't. I just didn't expect it. LILIAN: I'm glad to hear that. TENCHI: I can fight pretty well when I want to. LILIAN: (glancing upward) Do you realize that there's a giant floating thing up there? Tenchi puts his shirt back on. TENCHI: That's just the hot springs. You should come visit some time. LILIAN: (strangely calm) I don't think so. I've always been afraid of heights. So, how is it going with you and that girl? TENCHI: (alerted) Who? LILIAN: (standing) That one you went out with the other day. That princess, I think. Tenchi takes a glance upward. TENCHI: You mean Ayeka. She spent most of the time talking with Samantha. I don't know, but I think Ayeka likes her better. LILIAN: You feel like lunch? TENCHI: Hmm... LILIAN: I've seen this guy. He works at a pizza place in town. He spends more time outside smoking than working, though. Samantha asked him about you, and all he said was that you were an insufferable geek. TENCHI: Oh? Hey, that sounds familiar. 11 INT. MAIN HALL Mihoshi is alerted to a beeping in her bracelet. MIHOSHI: Geez! More trouble! 12 EXT. OLD ENTRANCE SITE Several uniformed guards pursue a pirate, running from the pavilion. 13 EXT. FRONT YARD A clearing at the base of the hill, marked by a trail going down the side. A makeshift gated palisade stands at the entrance--where the trail meets up with a road. Noboyuki glances around, as the reporters continue to make their way toward the road. He notices a couple of spacecraft shooting upward--one in pursuit of the other. The two guardians--Azaka and Kamidake--come gliding up behind the reporters, halting right at the edge of the gate. The reporters apparently never notice any of it. FIRST REPORTER: This is the last time I listen to those punks. NOBOYUKI: Hey-- Thanks for stopping by! Azaka and Kamidake turn to him. AZAKA: Isn't it nice to have visitors all the time? KAMIDAKE: Yes. It's too bad we always seem to get called away on duties. 14 EXT. ROAD A small car goes by, as a girl and her mother go walking along the side of the road. 15 INT. SMALL CAR Lilian is driving, and Tenchi is casually staring--as if hypnotized. LILIAN: It's Samantha's, in case you were wondering. TENCHI: What is? LILIAN: This car. TENCHI: It is? (glancing around) I thought it was a rental. LILIAN: (laughing) Rental! That's a good one. Tenchi ponders briefly, then returns to casually staring. 16 EXT. CARROT FIELDS (a little hazy) Tenchi is working in the fields, as Ryo-Ohki suddenly appears in spaceship form--momentarily startling him. He then sighs and looks down as Ryoko flickers and appears in front of him, holding a small bag. RYOKO: Tenchi! Guess what I brought back. TENCHI: Let me guess. You robbed another bank. RYOKO: (a little disappointed) I did not rob a bank! I robbed a museum! Anyway, some moron at that bar dared me to. Ryo-Ohki suddenly appears in humanoid form. Tenchi pats Ryo-Ohki on the head, then turns to Ryoko. TENCHI: Hey there! (to Ryoko) You were at another bar? Geez! Ryoko pouts a little bit. RYOKO: I don't see why you make such a big deal out of it. Anyway, I just had to rob that museum, Tenchi. It was a matter of pride! TENCHI: (sighing) Pride, she says! 17 INT. CAR They hit a bump, and Tenchi momentarily loses his train of thought, then ponders again. 18 INT. ELABORATE JURAIAN LIBRARY (hazy again) Ayeka is sitting at a small desk, looking through a book at one side, holding a pen over some important-looking documents on the other. There are a couple of stacks of books just in front of those. Ayeka continues looking through the book, then writes. Tenchi approaches (wearing some grim-looking uniform), and considers. AYEKA: I'll be done in a moment, Tenchi. TENCHI: Is that what I think it is? AYEKA: (glancing up) It isn't an explorer saga, if that's what you're thinking. TENCHI: (frowning) More war pacts? AYEKA: (smiling wryly, continuing to write) A treaty, actually. With the last of the holdouts of the old Galaxy Union on our side, we can finally draw out that raider menace. Tenchi sighs, a little disturbed. Ayeka turns to another page in her book, then looks up at Tenchi, a little alerted. AYEKA: What's wrong? TENCHI: Ayeka, I know I've said this before, but... AYEKA: You think I am 'overreacting' again? TENCHI: I think that if you show the raiders that you can be baited like this, it'll just inflame them more. Ayeka puts down her pen, smugly reassessing. AYEKA: You think I'm about to act hastily? TENCHI: (a little overwhelmed) No, that's not it-- AYEKA: (rolling her eyes) Tenchi, please. Leave diplomacy to those who have been raised on it. I see quite clearly what must be done. TENCHI: (sullen) Yeah. That's what I'm afraid of. 19 INT. CAR Lilian looks around and notices Tenchi staring. LILIAN: What are you thinking about? TENCHI: Huh? Oh, nothing. LILIAN: Samantha does that a lot. TENCHI: Does what? LILIAN: Spaces out. It's okay. A lot of people do it, too. TENCHI: (a little disconcerted) I didn't realize I was doing that. LILIAN: (musing) Yeah. That's what she always says, too. 20 EXT. HOT SPRINGS RESORT (begin haziness) An elaborate hot springs resort, complete with a hotel, restaurant, and a couple of theme park rides. 21 EXT. A NEARBY MALL A mall (as in a shaded walkway) connecting the hotel with the restaurant and the nearby hot springs. Tenchi appears, looking around as a few people walk by. Everyone suddenly starts looking up and pointing. 22 EXT. HIGH OVERHEAD A figure is soaring over head, whooping and laughing, descending on a parachute. 23 EXT. MALL A couple of spectators looking up seem to recognize the figure. FIRST SPECTATOR: Hey, isn't that Sasami? SECOND SPECTATOR: Yeah. Isn't she cool? Some of the people in the crowd start yelling and cheering as Tenchi watches. He is a little amazed, but also not really disappointed. TENCHI: (softly) Yeah. You have no idea. 24 INT. CAR (end haziness again) LILIAN: Another five minutes, and bang! You know what I mean? TENCHI: Uh... Oh, yeah. LILIAN: (frowning) You haven't been listening to a word I've said, have you? TENCHI: (annoyed) Huh? No, I've been listening. LILIAN: (skeptical) Likely story. Anyway... 25 INT. MAIN HALL (hazy again) Tenchi is reading a newspaper at the sofa, picking up a cup of coffee as Mihoshi enters. MIHOSHI: Tenchi! Good morning! TENCHI: Good-- (wincing) morning... Tenchi can't finish his greeting before Mihoshi slips and falls backward to the floor. MIHOSHI: (dizzy, but still conscious) Ouch. 26 INT. CAR Lilian looks a little annoyed but amused. LILIAN: That's when this five-hundred pound gorilla began ripping up tree trunks and eating them. Then he began spitting, and all kinds of birds were dropping from the sky. TENCHI: What the--? LILIAN: Oh. You're awake again. (glancing around) You daydream an awful lot, you know? TENCHI: (a little mortified) Sorry. LILIAN: (smiling) It's okay. I don't mind. Just don't pull that crap during lunch, okay? TENCHI: (staying focused) Right. 27 EXT. YOKO'S OKONOMIYAKI SHOP A shop that's evidently a little more popular with teenagers, as several adults pass by. 28 INT. SHOP Lilian and Tenchi are at a table, each with what appears to be something between a pizza and a pancake. LILIAN: Does this qualify as a date? Tenchi chuckles, not altogether nervously. TENCHI: What do you think? LILIAN: Okay, it's not. I guess it's more of a chance meeting. Tenchi seems a little more comfortable. LILIAN: (still pondering) It's not like I have trouble with dating or finding dates. TENCHI: (smiling) Yeah. LILIAN: (nodding) I mean, why should I? TENCHI: (very pleasant) What a silly question! Lilian pauses for a moment. LILIAN: (very business-like) Tenchi, you want to run away with me? TENCHI: (wide-eyed with shock) Huh? Lilian picks at her food as she explains. LILIAN: Okay, it is a little sudden, but you gotta admit--you're not going to do any better than me. TENCHI: I... I wasn't going insult you, Dotty-- LILIAN: You thought I was joking? TENCHI: (double shock) ... LILIAN: No. I can see, you're not the type to think that. Sorry. I was dead serious. Tenchi takes a deep breath. TENCHI: I was about to say that I agree with you. I mean, about it being very sudden. I can't help but wonder why. LILIAN: (confused) Say again? TENCHI: (very curious) What do you see in me? LILIAN: (blunt) Nothing, frankly. I'm just a little tired of Sammy stealing my boyfriends. Lilian takes a serious stab at her food as Tenchi collects himself. TENCHI: Wait a minute. What does Sammy have to do with this? LILIAN: Well... She's very fond of you, of course. TENCHI: She is? LILIAN: Of course, she is. Don't tell me you haven't noticed. It's sickening the way she fawns on you. TENCHI: Now, that's shocking! LILIAN: Damn right, it is. Tenchi looking down, thinking. TENCHI: It explains a few things, though. LILIAN: (thoroughly annoyed) That girl is weird, I tell you. 29 INT. MAIN HALL Ayeka and Sasami are both knitting, as Ryoko returns from the hot springs. A moment later, Ryoko appears at the table across from Ayeka and Sasami and begins knitting. AYEKA: (looking up) Ryoko, why are you knitting? Suddenly feeling domestic? RYOKO: No! SASAMI: (smirking) She's mocking you, Ayeka. AYEKA: (growing annoyed) Why, of all the--! RYOKO: (snarling) Shut up! I'm just better at this than you. That's all there is to it! Ryo-Ohki appears in humanoid form and suddenly starts knitting. Ryoko pauses a couple moments and sighs, putting away her needles. AYEKA: (smug) In a contest of style and grace, there is no one superior to myself. SASAMI: (VO) Says the bananna queen! Sasami starts chuckling. AYEKA: What's so funny? SASAMI: Nothing! 30 EXT. SCHOOL BUILDING A nice, standard two-story building. 31 INT. CLASSROOM Lilian and Tenchi enter, amongst a small group of easels and painters--all various angles of a nude figure. LILIAN: Say, Tenchi. I think you'd better wait here. TENCHI: What for? Sammy's work isn't that bad, is it? Tenchi flinches, as if finding his father in bed with a woman. Samantha is sitting modestly in a chair in front of the class, modeling--nonetheless, sans clothing. Tenchi glances upward, instinctively, as Samantha notices him and happily stands--reaching down to grab her dress. SAMANTHA: Hey, Tenchi! I'll be right with you. TENCHI: (slowly turning aside) Take your time, please. Samantha deftly slides her dress on over her head--a nice sleeveless piece that looks a little prudish at first glance. SAMANTHA: Hey, Dotty! I'm glad you dragged Tenchi along. LILIAN: Well, once I told him you were in an art class, I couldn't keep him away. TENCHI: I wish you had told me she was modeling. SAMANTHA: (very pleasant) It's okay now, Tenchi. You can look. (to Lilian) Isn't Tenchi such a gentleman? LILIAN: (casual) He's just perfect for you. Tenchi turns redder by the moment. 32 EXT. SCHOOL BUILDING From an angle, you can see the tree-lined road going by other buildings--mostly two or three stories. Tenchi, Lilian and Samantha have to cross the road and walk down a sidewalk to exit the campus. 33 EXT. SIDEWALK A few students pass them on the way. TENCHI: Excuse me, Samantha, but how do you model like that? SAMANTHA: (smiling) Beg pardon? TENCHI: (a little more annoyed than nervous) I could never do something like that. SAMANTHA: (tickled, as if discovering a new toy) Why not? They ascend a few steps toward another block of sidewalk. TENCHI: I'd just be too terrified. Aren't you uncomfortable? SAMANTHA: Well, I was the first time. After a while, you just start to have fun with it. The body is a work of art, you know. Isn't that right, Dotty? LILIAN: Samantha is more abstract than realist, but yeah. SAMANTHA: (wryly) Thanks a lot. (nudging Lilian) You're the one who talked me into it, you know. LILIAN: I did? I thought that was Spacey. SAMANTHA: (fairly certain) I'm positive it was you, Dotty. I asked you about some way to make money, but not a whole lot of money. You remember? For the little gold chains? LILIAN: (recognizing) Oh, yeah. Right. That was right after Roger found out about some of your expenses. I was working in a cafe at the time, and I was so ticked off at you. Samantha glances at her watch, chuckling. SAMANTHA: Oh, Dotty! Sometimes you can be so obnoxious! (sighing) That reminds me--I have to go pick up Roger at the bus station in a little while. They stop as Lilian takes out her purse and fishes around. LILIAN: I suppose you'll want the keys. (looking up) You want to hang around with us for a while, or will you be along later? SAMANTHA: I'm afraid I won't be around till later. Roger has this thing about thinking he knows his way around, then he gets terribly lost. He's such a bore. LILIAN: (finding the keys) There they are. Lilian offers the keys then snatches away as Samantha is about to take them. SAMANTHA: What? LILIAN: Now, I remember. I was ticked off at you because you stole Roger from me. SAMANTHA: You were mad at me? LILIAN: Yeah. Come to think of it, I still am. SAMANTHA: (a characteristic smirk) Oh! I have a fabulous idea! Tenchi immediately scowls. SAMANTHA: (calmly brilliant) I'll trade you Roger for Tenchi. Doesn't that seem fair? LILIAN: (nodding) I should do that. Tenchi shakes his head. 34 EXT. OLD MASAKI HOUSE SITE A spaceship descends from the sky. 35 EXT. WALKWAY Noboyuki is hammering on the end of the walkway by himself. NOBOYUKI: (muttering) I thought I said lunch, not stop for the day. 36 EXT. CLEARING A clearing of forest, somewhere in the distance. Mihoshi climbs out of her shuttle, and looks around. MIHOSHI: Oh, geez! Where is this? 37 EXT. TRAINING GROUNDS Yosho is sitting on a nearby rock, as Tenchi arrives, followed shortly by Lilian. YOSHO: (to Lilian) Ah, I see you've made it. (to Tenchi) You're late. TENCHI: Sorry, Grandpa. YOSHO: (a little imperious) Today Tenchi, I have a special task for you. Today you have a student. You know what it means to have a student? Tenchi ponders for a moment. TENCHI: You have to teach? YOSHO: (upset) No! (VO) Nothing sinks in with this boy. Lilian casually sizes up Yosho. YOSHO: (calm again) You cannot teach. You can only demonstrate. This is the way of the Juraian technique. Each student learns in their own way. Yosho stands and thrusts a training sword into Tenchi's hands. LILIAN: You mean, all I have to do is sit and watch? YOSHO: Whatever you feel is necessary. That is all one can ask--although, in Tenchi's case, it was necessary for him to mirror my movements. Lilian sits with one raised knee, and Yosho returns to his rock. YOSHO: (glancing at Lilian) Now, begin. TENCHI: (nodding) Right. Yosho gestures, as Tenchi goes through a set of parries and strikes. YOSHO: It is said that all learning is a circle. One goes from being a thoughtless untrained amateur, to a thinking untrained beginner, to a thinking trained student, and finally to a thoughtless well-trained master. One must employ the mind in one's training, then one must use one's training to unemploy the mind. Tenchi twists through several directions of guards and attacks. YOSHO: (rubbing his chin) As you can clearly see, Tenchi exhibits a remarkable combination of odd gyrations and stops in his strokes. In spite of all my efforts, Tenchi's movements show nothing but strain. Lilian marvels. YOSHO: (smiling) And yet... When the opportunity presents itself... Yosho throws a small rock at Tenchi, and it hits him squarely in the back, knocking him over. Yosho groans in disgust. YOSHO: Tenchi! TENCHI: Ouch! That hurt! YOSHO: What's the matter with you, boy? Can't you at least dodge? TENCHI: Every time I'm nearly ready, somebody messes it up! YOSHO: (rolling his eyes) An expert swordsman, Tenchi, must be able to sense such things. TENCHI: (rubbing his back) I don't see how. Yosho stands and gestures for Tenchi to give him the practice sword. YOSHO: Here. Now, Tenchi. You come sit and watch. Tenchi gives him the sword, and Yosho holds it out to Lilian--who stands and takes it. Lilian casually strolls out to the grounds, as Tenchi sits. TENCHI: I'm telling you, Grandpa. I almost had it. YOSHO: (turning to Lilian) Now, feel free to demonstrate for us. LILIAN: I don't know anything about Juraian technique. Is it okay if I just go through a few basic moves? YOSHO: As you wish. Lilian briefly pauses, then brings the sword up and through a basic strike. Tenchi looks a little dumbfounded. TENCHI: (softly) Isn't that a little slow? YOSHO: (scowling) Tenchi, watch carefully. You too, Ayeka. Ayeka appears after a bit of rustling from a bush nearby. AYEKA: How did you know--? YOSHO: A good swing isn't just about speed. They watch, as Lilian brings the sword back up through a smooth curve, and down again through a smooth loop. She brings the sword up again to parry, then thrusts forward-- again, in a loopy motion. AYEKA: She's making no exertion, that's for sure. YOSHO: Exactly. No resistance--like water. Now, do you see? Tenchi still looks skeptical. Ryoko suddenly appears, floating next to Ayeka. RYOKO: I don't know. One good punch swing could cut right through that water. Mihoshi then appears next to Ryoko. MIHOSHI: Oh, wow! Hey! I know where this is! Sasami sneaks up next to Ayeka, between her and Ryoko. SASAMI: I don't know, Ryoko. She might be pretty strong. Yosho looks down, almost exasperated. RYOKO: Strong, my butt! Look at her. She's almost as skinny as Ayeka. I bet one good forcing thrust would take her down. They continue watching, as Lilian goes through a few short arcs, followed by some longer arcs. YOSHO: (softly) Tenchi, watch this. Yosho picks up a rock and throws it at Lilian, just as she starts to turn her back. In one smooth movement, Lilian twists aside, brings the sword up, then slashes down at the rock--knocking it down squarely. TENCHI: She just got lucky. Ayeka and Sasami start smirking, as Ryoko folds her arms--glaring a Lilian. Lilian stops and looks at all of them. LILIAN: (annoyed, but still dignified) Okay, you want to see something? Watch this. Lilian finds a small branch--about a couple inches thick--and places it between a couple of large rocks. She then draws back and breaks it with the heel of her hand. Ryoko snickers and turns away, as Ayeka frowns imperiously. AYEKA: What do you call that? Was that supposed to be impressive? LILIAN: I'd like to see you do better! AYEKA: (a little sneeringly) My strength is nothing to be trifled with. TENCHI: (looking around at Yosho) Was this part of the lesson? Yosho gets up a little slowly. YOSHO: Well-- Mihoshi fires her fist at a tree, and it goes crashing down. The others look at her in surprise. MIHOSHI: Hey, Tenchi! How was that! TENCHI: Mihoshi? I didn't know you were that strong. MIHOSHI: (chuckling) Oh, yeah. I forgot. I'm probably at least ten times stronger than the average human. Ayeka smirks again, and Ryoko snorts, and Lilian looks on in amazement. RYOKO: Oh, please! That's nothing. Watch this. Ryoko finds a large rock and pulverizes it to dust. RYOKO: And that was just a little bit. You don't want to see what I do for an encore. Ayeka picks up the practice sword. AYEKA: You want to see technique, Tenchi? Check this out. Ayeka moves through an impressive combination strike and parry routine. RYOKO: Oh, please! Technique doesn't impress Tenchi. I should know. YOSHO: I think that concludes today's lesson. Yosho strolls away. TENCHI: Grandpa? Lilian watches in amazement, as Ayeka and Ryoko compare muscles, and Mihoshi fires her fist into a large rock--badly bruising it. RYOKO: You see, Princess? I'm much stronger than you! Look at those puny biceps! AYEKA: Size isn't what matters! Strength comes from skill as well as power. LILIAN: (to Tenchi) Are they for real? TENCHI: Yeah. I'm afraid so. SASAMI: I'm sorry. They're usually a lot nicer than this. LILIAN: (realizing) Oh! So, that's how it is around here! Tenchi is even more embarrassed. TENCHI: Yeah. (hanging his head) Lucky me, huh? 38 EXT. OLD MASAKI HOUSE SITE Evening approaches, as Tenchi and Noboyuki are working on the walkway, again. 39 EXT. WALKWAY The two are nearly finished, approaching the side of the lake with a small stack of planks. NOBOYUKI: You look like you've been having fun. And here I am, working. TENCHI: Some fun. Grandpa was just looking for an excuse to humiliate me. NOBOYUKI: Oh. The usual afternoon, you mean. TENCHI: I like the practice, but not with so many people watching. I'm not a champion samurai, you know. NOBOYUKI: Is that so? Why not? TENCHI: (flustered) Oh! There's no point in even talking about it. I should know by now. Grandpa just likes toying with people. NOBOYUKI: (smirking) You bring it on yourself, boy. TENCHI: (scowling) Huh? Noboyuki chuckles for a moment, then looks serious. NOBOYUKI: It's obvious to all of us that your heart isn't in it. If you aren't fighting for real, you just don't get it. Fencing should be fun. TENCHI: (a little shocked) Hey, that's true. Maybe-- Samantha walks up the walkway to the end--where they are working. SAMANTHA: Hello. I hope I'm not interrupting. NOBOYUKI: No. We were just about finished, anyway. TENCHI: Hello, Samantha. SAMANTHA: (smiling very pleasantly) Hello. NOBOYUKI: (turning briefly to Tenchi) Let's stop here for now. You pick up those boards and take them to the supply shed. (to Samantha) So, are you staying for supper? SAMANTHA: (casual) No, I'm quite all right. Tenchi goes to pick up the loose planks, as Noboyuki continues the ritual invitation. NOBOYUKI: Please. I insist. SAMANTHA: Oh. Well then, I accept. I haven't stayed for supper here in quite some time. Have the arrangements changed since last time? NOBOYUKI: I don't think so. Tenchi? Tenchi lifts the planks and glances around. TENCHI: We'll save something if it tastes like rat poison. Tenchi starts hauling the planks, as Noboyuki chuckles. NOBOYUKI: I'm sorry. That boy gets a little rude sometimes. SAMANTHA: Oh. Well, as long as I'm not imposing. NOBOYUKI: Imposing? Oh, never! We'd never notice, even if you were--with all the others. SAMANTHA: (a little confused) Well, that's a relief. 40 INT. ENTRANCE Tenchi enters, just as the phone starts ringing. TENCHI: (answering the phone) Hello? (a few seconds pass) Yeah, I'll go check. 41 INT. MAIN HALL Noboyuki is adjusting a couple of small sofas, as Ayeka and Samantha sit at the table. Tenchi enters, looking around for Samantha. TENCHI: Samantha, telephone! SAMANTHA: Who is it? 42 INT. ENTRANCE Samantha is at the phone. SAMANTHA: Roger? (a few seconds pass) Hmm, no. She puts down the phone. Ayeka peeks in, looking curious. 43 INT. MAIN HALL Noboyuki looks undecided, then drags one of the sofas to another position. Samantha enters and sits at the table, as Sasami arranges some dishes with food. SASAMI: Who was that? SAMANTHA: Just Roger. Ayeka enters and sits at the table. AYEKA: A brief conversation. SASAMI: Didn't you pick him up at the bus station? Samantha looks as if she is wondering whether she did. SAMANTHA: I wonder... AYEKA: (almost alarmed) You didn't leave him there? SAMANTHA: (chuckling) Now, that would have been something! No, I'm afraid I am duty-bound to do these things. Someone has to, at any rate. Ryoko appears at the table, floating next to Samantha. RYOKO: So, what did you talk about? Noboyuki goes to the table and sits. SAMANTHA: What else? Roger. The man lives in a world of himself. Noboyuki looks between Ayeka and Samantha, as the discussion continues. AYEKA: He doesn't flaunt his wealth, does he? Ryoko sits at the table, takes some food and starts digging in, as Sasami goes to sit. SAMANTHA: Only if you count the cars he's had. AYEKA: He's a collector? SAMANTHA: No. He just likes to buy expensive cars. Then he drives them like a maniac until they break down. Then he gets another, and so on. AYEKA: (glancing at Sasami) What an odd person! SAMANTHA: (dismissive) Not at all, really. He's just the single most obnoxious person I've ever met. SASAMI: (a little nervous) Weren't you two going to get married, or something? Ryoko looks up from her food. RYOKO: Yeah, that's right! What happened? Tenchi enters, and Samantha looks a little reluctant. TENCHI: Hello, everybody! AYEKA: Hello, Lord Tenchi. RYOKO: (glaring at Samantha) Well? SAMANTHA: (very casual) Well, things just didn't work out. That's all. RYOKO: (skeptical) That's all? Ayeka looks up at Tenchi, a little annoyed. AYEKA: Why not? Tenchi, isn't it true that the more a couple fights, the better the relationship? TENCHI: (frowning, almost sneering) I don't think so. Sounds like something out of a comic book. RYOKO: (laughing) Yeah, what a stupid idea! (growing alarmed, suddenly) Hey, wait a minute--! Tenchi sits at the table, right next to Samantha. Ryoko appears between them and glares at Tenchi for a moment. TENCHI: What's up? Ryoko glances sternly at Samantha, and Tenchi chuckles, moving aside. TENCHI: Oh! Right. 44 EXT. MASAKI HOUSE Evening. The guardians accompany a figure carrying several large bags. 45 INT. MAIN HALL Mihoshi is sitting at a sofa (her right hand wrapped severely in bandages), along with Sasami and Ryo-Ohki (in humanoid form). Ayeka is sitting with Samantha at the table (now clear of dishes), as Tenchi enters from the entrance with Roger (who is carrying two of the large bags). TENCHI: Samantha, I believe you have company. SAMANTHA: Anyone I know? ROGER: What an attitude. (glancing around) Actually, I came here to see all of you. I understand you've had a bit of some trouble lately. Sasami, Mihoshi and Ryo-Ohki notice the bags. Tenchi exits to the entrance again. MIHOSHI: Did you get something for us? Roger gestures with one of the bags. ROGER: I remember Samantha saying something about clothes, so I got these at a shop. (to Ayeka) Here. Ayeka takes the bag, very suspicious. ROGER: It's the same size as those clothes you gave Sammy the other day. Ayeka holds up one of the kimonos--a festive thing, if ever there was one. AYEKA: (scowling) How charming. Roger gestures with another bag to Sasami. ROGER: Here you are. They're not as nice as the ones I got for your sister, but... Sasami takes the bag, eagerly. She takes out a beige tunic and trousers. SASAMI: Oh, wow! This is perfect! Ayeka looks at Sasami's outfit in alarm. AYEKA: You cannot be serious! Samantha gets up and confronts Roger, looking annoyed. SAMANTHA: The answer is still no. I don't care how you try to bribe me. ROGER: You? Who said I had anything for you? Tenchi enters again, holding a couple more bags. SAMANTHA: What are those for? Roger gestures at the bags. ROGER: Those are for Tenchi and his father. I know they're modest, but I couldn't resist. Samantha looks briefly disappointed, then annoyed again. SAMANTHA: So, why are you here? ROGER: (not in the least perturbed) I'm sorry, my dear, but you know how I love to show off, and I just had to come here in person and make my offer again. AYEKA: (suddenly curious) Hmm? And what was that? Samantha rolls her eyes. ROGER: (only too happy) Well, I happen to have these rooms in a nice beach-side hotel. I wouldn't want them to go to waste. SAMANTHA: (folding her arms) Forget it. Tenchi has left the room again, as Sasami, Mihoshi and Ryo-Ohki look at Roger--a little dumbfounded. ROGER: Then, there's this boat that I have. I like to do a lot of sailing, you know. SAMANTHA: And? ROGER: 'And?' Is that all you can say? SAMANTHA: Sorry, Roger, but it's this way with you every time. I'm not impressed. MIHOSHI: I am. SASAMI: Me too. AYEKA: (confused) Samantha, this all sounds pleasant to me. I don't see why his offer should seem so unreasonable. SAMANTHA: (sighing) Don't you see? This is just the way he is. Roger has a problem--he throws money at it. (to Roger) There's more to life than money, you know. ROGER: (casual) No, but it helps. MIHOSHI: (another brilliant observation) Oh! You want her up there to dump her! You've got something on the side, huh? SASAMI: (gasping) Mihoshi! Tenchi enters again, minus the bags, looking around happily as the others stare at Mihoshi in shock, then turn to Roger--who looks casually innocent. TENCHI: Okay, did I miss something? 46 EXT. MASAKI HOUSE Early morning. 47 INT. MAIN HALL Tenchi is sitting at the dining table, reading a paper. Ayeka descends from the balcony, wearing the festive kimono. TENCHI: Good morning, Ayeka. AYEKA: Good morning, Lord Tenchi. Tenchi continues reading the paper. AYEKA: Notice anything? Tenchi looks up. TENCHI: What? AYEKA: (pleasant) Anything out of the ordinary, I mean. Tenchi ponders for a moment, then returns to the paper. TENCHI: You worried about Sasami and Mihoshi? I'm sure they're going to be all right. Ayeka pouts for a moment, then goes to stand across from Tenchi at the table. AYEKA: I meant something a little closer. Isn't there something personal that strikes you as a bit odd? TENCHI: No. (thinking for a moment) Well, now that you mention it, I saw Samantha out jogging this morning. I never noticed whether she was into that before. AYEKA: (annoyed) And nothing else? TENCHI: (looking up, curious) Hmm? Ayeka holding out an arm, and gestures at it with her eyes. TENCHI: (a little embarrassed) Oh, I see! Yeah, that's pretty busy, isn't it? How many red dragons you got there? AYEKA: (uncertain) Four or five, at least. 48 EXT. OCEAN A small boat skims across the water. 49 EXT. BOAT Sasami is driving the boat, and Mihoshi is beside her, as they plow through wave after wave. Sasami laughs, and Mihoshi giggles, almost delirious. Mihoshi's wrist band starts beeping--they are barely able to hear it over the sound of the wind and the waves. The boat slows, and Mihoshi looks at her wrist band. SASAMI: I thought I heard something. MIHOSHI: (groaning) Always when I'm having fun! SASAMI: (grinning) Relax. I have to return the boat, and you have to sign for it, remember? MIHOSHI: (relieved) Oh! That's right. I have diplomatic immunity right now. Thank the gods we didn't bring Roger! They both cackle with laughter as they shoot across the water again. 50 EXT. FRONT YARD Samantha jogs up to the front path, just as Lilian enters through the gate. Samantha stops and catches her breath, as Lilian walks up and takes a moment to look around. LILIAN: There was a walkway over there, wasn't there? SAMANTHA: Yeah, last night. Tenchi and his father took out the last of it after you left. LILIAN: Oh, so you were here? I thought you were staying with Roger. SAMANTHA: (chuckling) Silly girl! I'd sooner sleep in a snake pit. Lilian makes a characteristic twitch--she looks around and checks if anyone else is watching. LILIAN: Okay. So, you're sleeping with the kid, now? SAMANTHA: (a little surprised) Tenchi? Now, Dotty. You know I'm not that type of person. Lilian flinches--already starting to move away from Samantha. LILIAN: Oh, I don't want to know what type of person you are, Sammy. I think I prefer the mysterious, enigmatic version. SAMANTHA: (laughing) You're so right! Forget about trying to peg me down. Samantha hesitates, looking up the hill toward the house, as Lilian starts to go the other way--toward the training grounds. SAMANTHA: You aren't going to abandon me? LILIAN: I'll be a stone's throw away, you chicken! Lilian turns and waves, as she starts to jog. Samantha then starts up the hill. 51 INT. HOTEL ROOM Roger is working at a table, writing at a stack of papers, smoking up a small cloud. He flips through a page, then double-checks. ROGER: Well, well. What do we have here? 52 INT. MAIN HALL Ayeka is sitting at the table, looking as ponderous as possible while wearing her clownish outfit. Samantha enters, looking disheveled--still wearing her jogging outfit. SAMANTHA: Good morning, Ayeka. Have you seen Tenchi? AYEKA: Good morning, Samantha. Actually... I have. Samantha pauses for a moment, then advances curiously. Ayeka looks down at some tea--suddenly in front of her, as if it had been there the whole time. Samantha sits across from Ayeka, as Ayeka takes a sip. SAMANTHA: Okay if I sit here? AYEKA: I do not mind. SAMANTHA: So, what's on your itinerary for today? AYEKA: (gently) I thought I'd start with some tea. SAMANTHA: Ah. Ayeka takes another sip. SAMANTHA: (pleasantly fidgeting) You're not in hurry, are you? Ayeka thoughtfully pauses, then sets down the tea. AYEKA: A drink must be savored. Each drop takes equal preparation, and therefore should receive one's equal attention. SAMANTHA: (smiling, but still fidgeting) Yeah, I guess that's right. I'm a pretty laid back kind of person, myself. So... Ayeka looks down, genuinely concerned. AYEKA: Of course. As you say, Samantha, but you leave me with doubts. Ayeka picks up the tea again--almost reflexively--as Samantha suddenly looks grim. SAMANTHA: Pardon? AYEKA: Oh, not the manner of your person. I've come to realize that first impressions can be very deceiving. You remember how you behaved when we first met? SAMANTHA: Oh, that? All right, so I was a little tipsy. So what? AYEKA: You were quite rude, and I thought I might enjoy seeing you leave. Now, I'm very hesitant. SAMANTHA: Leave? Ayeka sets the tea down, again. AYEKA: It puts me in the mind of a certain dubious young man who tricked you into coming here in the first place. I seem to recall that Tenchi's grandfather arranged it. He seemed to know a lot about you. SAMANTHA: (a little eager) Yeah? AYEKA: (pondering again) I assumed that your talents were employed in arranging a certain distraction that allowed him to convey certain tokens. It made a trying situation a little easier, but I noticed something... well, distinctive. 53 INT. MAIN HALL (flashback) Samantha is a little bored, but dignified. SAMANTHA: Hello. I hope my English isn't too much of a hassle. 54 INT. MAIN HALL Ayeka continues, disturbingly calm. AYEKA: Please excuse me for saying so, but I rather doubt that you and I are quite as different as you pretend. Samantha looks pensive. SAMANTHA: Is that so? 55 INT. HOTEL ROOM Roger is flipping through a stack of papers, then finds one. He compares the new one to another one set off to the side. ROGER: Ye gods! I'll be buggered. 56 INT. MAIN HALL Ayeka continues again, brick-like in demeanor. AYEKA: Tenchi told me that your grandfather is similar to his--always trying to arrange a certain marriage. So, Samantha, please explain to me why that is. Samantha sighs and starts to chuckle. SAMANTHA: It's a silly thing, actually. He keeps arranging dates with royalty-types. It's embarrassing. AYEKA: (pleasantly surprised) Really? So, you meet many? SAMANTHA: (clearing her throat) Well, I haven't in quite some time. After Roger and I met, I managed to convince my parents that we were intended. That pretty much put the stop to the parade of hemophiliacs. AYEKA: (almost wryly amused) Believe me, I sympathize. There is nothing more embarrassing than being confronted with examples of manliness that pervade the courts of royalty. SAMANTHA: (relieved) Oh, no kidding! They are so strutting and patronizing. What an awful bore! (pausing for a moment) You know, Princess, maybe you and I do have a lot in common. AYEKA: (smiling nicely) Yes. We both have good taste. SAMANTHA: (starting to ponder) In men--I agree. We both love stylish clothes. We enjoy eating well... Ayeka has a flicker of doubt. SAMANTHA: (continues pondering) We both enjoy traveling, good friends, honesty, modesty... AYEKA: (fluidly interrupting) In spite of wealth. Samantha casually agrees, then grows alarmed. AYEKA: Oh my. I didn't know that. Samantha is briefly annoyed, then disgusted. SAMANTHA: Suddenly, I need a good bath. 57 EXT. FLOATING ONSEN 58 INT. POOL Ryoko is relaxing in the pool, blissfully unaware of anything below. 59 EXT. TRAINING GROUNDS Lilian arrives in time to see Tenchi finish a very ordinary looking draw-strike-shake-sheathe movement. Tenchi gets stuck half-way through the draw motion, pulls his head down through the strike, then nearly severs his own arm with his shake-sheathe motion. He looks doubtfully at the practice sword, then goes through it again--falling off- balance in the draw motion, and giving up altogether. Lilian leans up quietly next to a tree, and continues studying Tenchi's form. Tenchi scratches his head. TENCHI: I never realized how bad I really am at this. Tenchi brings the sword to a basic guard position, then switches to another, then another. He takes a few long breaths, then brings the sword up for a strike--finally noticing Lilian off to the side. He falters his swing and loses the sword grip about half-way through. TENCHI: Oh! Hey, Dotty! LILIAN: (flinching) Hey. Tenchi recovers the sword. TENCHI: Did you come here to practice? Lilian continues to lean on the tree. LILIAN: Yeah. I won't bother you, though. You look like you need it more than me. Tenchi chuckles and scratches his head as he walks over to Lilian--holding the sword like he's not sure what to do with it. TENCHI: No, that's okay. Here. You can practice. I'll just sit and watch. Tenchi offers the sword, fairly casually. LILIAN: Oh... (taking the sword) Just like that? TENCHI: (confused) Huh? Lilian holds out the sword properly--blade inward and offered sideways, with space left to take it by the handle. LILIAN: You see? TENCHI: (still puzzled) See what? Lilian smirks, then takes the sword and leans it up against one shoulder. LILIAN: That's okay. Never mind. Tenchi seems a little annoyed, as Lilian goes out to the grounds clearing. He then goes to sit, while Lilian brings the sword down to one side. Tenchi scratches his head, puzzling, while Lilian just continues to stand there. TENCHI: Sorry to bother you, but is that meditation? LILIAN: No. I'm finding my center. TENCHI: Center? LILIAN: Of course. How else can you know where your guard circles are? Lilian brings the sword out at arm's length. LILIAN: If you enter within the circle of your opponent unguarded, you're dead. TENCHI: (rolling his eyes) Well, sure. LILIAN: (turning slowly) The center is the point where your guard moves fastest, so you concentrate your energy there. TENCHI: (curious) How do you do that? Lilian brings the sword back down, then up. LILIAN: I'm sure you've heard this a million times, but you just have to visualize it. TENCHI: (nodding) Right. Lilian brings the sword down in a nice, smooth arc. LILIAN: Then you let it flow. You don't think about it. You just trust it. Tenchi leans on an elbow, looking up at Lilian. TENCHI: I don't think that works for me. Lilian returns to a guarded stance. LILIAN: That's probably because you haven't found your center. Without it, you can't find your range, and you can't visualize. If you can't really visualize, you can't really trust your stroke. Can you? TENCHI: (amused) I think my center wanders around. LILIAN: (shaking her head) Now, I understand. You think your center depends on whether you're facing a real life and death crisis. TENCHI: (surprised) Yeah, that's it! LILIAN: (muttering) Of all the nonsense! Lilian goes through an elaborate series of strokes, then shakes the sword on the left and right, then makes a smooth sheathe. LILIAN: I've been in several fights--many of them deadly serious--and my center has always been right here. She gestures at her stomach. LILIAN: Not sword fights, but serious fights. Tenchi frowns, as he wistfully ponders. TENCHI: You know. I've been in serious fights, myself, and I've never even noticed. LILIAN: Really? You? TENCHI: Oh yeah! Lilian is bewildered for a moment, then she smiles. LILIAN: Well, then I'm wasting time. All my showing off can do is prove to be my downfall. Tenchi sits up, perplexed. Lilian offers the sword back to him. LILIAN: Here. Let the lesson continue, please. Tenchi takes it, a little reluctant. TENCHI: Well... Okay. 60 INT. POOL Ryoko awakens at the sound of Ayeka entering, and frowns. RYOKO: (VO) This is always a bad sign. Ayeka sits at the edge of the pool, apparently unaware of Ryoko, and brings out a bottle of sake. RYOKO: (VO) Very bad. Ryoko promptly vanishes, leaving a few small waves. Ayeka notices the waves, then shrugs. AYEKA: Ah. Let the mayhem begin. 61 INT. HOTEL ROOM Roger is sitting back in his chair, still contemplating quietly when he is suddenly seized with uncontrollable fits of madness. Papers go flying randomly, as he babbles incoherently. ROGER: (slowly becoming coherent) Arrgh! Oh! I don't believe that woman! How could she do this to me?! 62 EXT. BOAT Mihoshi is driving, and is briefly distracted while Sasami gasps. SASAMI: Mihoshi! Look out for that--! The boat leaps slightly up into the air, making a sickening splat as it lands. SASAMI: --rock! MIHOSHI: Oh my god! Did we just hit something? Sasami catches her breath. MIHOSHI: (glancing around) Oh. Just a rock. No harm done... I hope. SASAMI: (looking down) Just to the boat. I think we've sprung a leak. MIHOSHI: (glancing down) Oh my! We'd better head back, then. SASAMI: (insistent) And hurry! 63 EXT. MASAKI HOUSE Samantha is standing at the third-floor balcony, working at an easel. She stops for a moment to take a drink from a small flask, then continues working. Ryoko appears, curious, and floats up next to her. RYOKO: What's that? Samantha very casually smiles, continuing to paint. SAMANTHA: It's a hand. RYOKO: (looking at the painting) A hand? Samantha looks at Ryoko--still very casual. SAMANTHA: It's a remarkable likeness. Ryoko cocks her head side-to-side, then scratches her head. RYOKO: Funny. All I see is a tree. Samantha looks back at the painting and starts crying, continuing to paint. SAMANTHA: (softly) It's a hand, I tell you. A hand! Ryoko is a little offended, but mostly shocked. RYOKO: Okay, okay. It's a hand. Geez. Sorry, I asked. 64 EXT. TRAINING GROUNDS Tenchi and Lilian are fighting in karate fashion. Lilian mostly throws punches and kicks while Tenchi manages a block to each one. LILIAN: (getting a little irritated) Come on. Fight me. Tenchi blocks a couple of medium punches and a high kick. TENCHI: I'm trying. Believe me. Lilian opens her left guard for a full half-second, then lands a round-house punch from her right. Tenchi goes down, as Lilian looks on in shock. LILIAN: Oh my god! Are you all right? TENCHI: (chuckling) Yeah, yeah. I'll live. Tenchi is sporting a nice big bruise next to his right eye. He slowly gets up and touches it, flinching in pain. LILIAN: (flinching in sympathy) You know, I really hate to fight someone who can't fight back. TENCHI: (exasperated) I can fight. LILIAN: (very doubtful) Can you, really? Tenchi touches his bruise again, becoming annoyed. TENCHI: (grim) I'd stake my life on it. Lilian stares down Tenchi for a moment, then backs away a few steps. LILIAN: Show me, then. Lilian makes her ready stance, as Tenchi continues to stand very casually. LILIAN: Okay. Here I come! Lilian fires a very fast leaping kick directly at Tenchi's unguarded side. The kick lands squarely and sends him flying into a tree. Dust flies upward, as leaves fall. LILIAN: (grimacing in surprise) Damn, that was stupid! Tenchi? Tenchi is dazed, unable to move. 65 EXT. FOREST PATH (hazy again) Tenchi's mother, Achika, is walking along a path with an umbrella. She turns and smiles as young Tenchi appears, running up to her. Tenchi seems oblivious to the rain, and he seems to be holding something between his hands. TENCHI: Mother! Mother! Guess what I found?! Achika looks down at him sadly, and looks at his hands. ACHIKA: What do you have there, little Tenchi? TENCHI: (grinning) I caught a pretty butterfly! Achika briefly grimaces, then smiles. Tenchi looks down at his hands in disappointment. TENCHI: Oh! I guess I held it too hard. She lifts Tenchi's chin. ACHIKA: Tenchi, I'm sure it was a pretty one. It was, wasn't it? TENCHI: (still disappointed, looking down) Yeah. ACHIKA: (grimly smiling) I'm happy you found it. Okay? TENCHI: (sullen) Okay. Achika takes out a rag and wipes Tenchi's hands. ACHIKA: (casual) Do me a favor next time, Tenchi, and be a little more careful. Okay? TENCHI: Okay. 66 EXT. TRAINING GROUNDS Tenchi looks up at Lilian--who is vastly relieved. LILIAN: Oh my god, I'm so sorry. Are you all right? TENCHI: (unsteady) Ouch. What a hit! LILIAN: (fretting) I didn't know you were just going to stand there. I didn't mean to pulverize you like that. TENCHI: (slowly getting up) It's okay, Dotty. I'm just really impressed. LILIAN: (still angry with herself) I thought for sure you'd at least block it. Tenchi casually brushes himself off. TENCHI: Well, you obviously didn't pulverize me. I feel fine. Forget about it. Ouch. LILIAN: (skeptical) Are you sure? TENCHI: (chuckling) I'm fine! Let's just quit for today, huh? LILIAN: (nods) Okay. 67 INT. POOL Ayeka is sitting in the pool, sipping sake, as Ryo-Ohki leaps onto her head (cabbit-form). RYO-OHKI: Miya! Ayeka is briefly confused, then starts shrieking in alarm. 68 EXT. BEACH Sasami and Mihoshi swim up to the beach, completely wet and somewhat covered with seaweed. 69 INT. HOTEL ROOM Roger is standing amidst a chaos of scattered papers, smoking, and muttering to himself. 70 EXT. THIRD FLOOR BALCONY Samantha is still painting, still crying, and still softly talking to herself. SAMANTHA: It is a hand. It's my own hand. It's no one else's. My hand. My hand. My actual hand. 71 EXT. LAKESIDE Lilian strolls toward the front yard, then stops and sits in the middle of the path. Lilian looks down, practically steaming. LILIAN: Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid! How could I be so stupid!? Lilian grabs her head with both hands and groans out loud, as Ryoko appears--looking on cautiously. RYOKO: (a little sardonic) Am I the only one who isn't nuts around here? 72 INT. MASAKI SHRINE Yosho is sitting, reading at the table, when a shadowy figure enters. YOSHO: (pleasant) Oh. Hello again. 73 INT. MAIN HALL Ryoko is lying on a support beam again, as Tenchi enters. TENCHI: Hello? Ryoko smirks and continues reading. TENCHI: (scratching his head) I guess the others are out. Tenchi casually goes toward the kitchen, in spite of being a little beaten up--so Ryoko doesn't notice anything unusual. 74 INT. HOTEL ROOM Roger doesn't notice much, as Mihoshi and Sasami enter. MIHOSHI: You have any towels? ROGER: Oh, certainly. I'm sure. 75 INT. POOL Ayeka is holding Ryo-Ohki, glaring at her. AYEKA: Ryo-Ohki, you little-- (suddenly recognizing something) Oh! Ryo-Ohki is dizzy and a little sluggish, but still cheerful. AYEKA: You little rascal! You've been into my sake, haven't you? 76 EXT. THIRD FLOOR BALCONY Samantha is sitting at the railing, looking outward, and still softly weeping. She takes another drink from her flask, just as Tenchi enters. Tenchi has a taped bandage near his right eye around his head, but he looks very alert. Samantha looks back briefly, noticing Tenchi, and quickly puts away her flask. TENCHI: Sammy? She wipes her face, but continues crying, in spite of the fact that she is smiling. SAMANTHA: Oh, hello. TENCHI: (a little overwhelmed) I can come back later. Samantha gets up, but very stiffly. SAMANTHA: Please, don't. Tenchi seems a little confused, so Samantha takes a step closer and starts to explain. SAMANTHA: Don't be embarrassed. I'm just a big baby when I'm soused. Tenchi slowly looks away, very nervous. TENCHI: Oh... Well, I'm not. I mean, I'm not embarrassed. SAMANTHA: (chuckling) You're not embarrassed by my hand painting? TENCHI: Your what? Samantha glances at the painting. TENCHI: (chuckling, humoring) Oh. It's nice. It's a very good... hand. SAMANTHA: (a little disappointed) Really? TENCHI: (insistent) Yeah. Samantha manages to stop crying, and she wipes her face again. She looks back over the balcony, then looks back at Tenchi. SAMANTHA: Can I tell you a secret? TENCHI: Huh? A secret? Sure. SAMANTHA: You promise not to tell anyone? TENCHI: Sure. SAMANTHA: Well... The truth is, I'm stinking rich. TENCHI: Stinking rich? She is a little forlorn, as if admitting to killing a pet. SAMANTHA: My family, that is. My family is quite wealthy. TENCHI: (befuddled, as usual) Okay. SAMANTHA: (a little dizzy, but still wryly amused) You're not embarrassed? TENCHI: (expressionless) Huh? Why should I be? Isn't that a good thing? Samantha grins, strangely, as she starts weeping again. SAMANTHA: Oh god! Samantha looks away again, and Tenchi slowly moves toward the door. TENCHI: I really think I'll come back later. 77 EXT. MASAKI SHRINE Lilian walks up to the entrance, a little reluctant, then seems about to knock at the door. Lilian is a little startled, as she hears a voice. YOSHO: (OC) Come in, Lilian. 78 INT. SHRINE Yosho stands, as Lilian enters. YOSHO: To tell you the truth, I wasn't expecting you quite this soon, but it seems that fate has sped things along. LILIAN: Expecting me? YOSHO: Of course. Yosho gestures at the table. YOSHO: (smiling, very pleasant) Please. Sit and have a drink of tea with me. LILIAN: (frowning) Me? YOSHO: (serious) Yes. I really must insist. 79 EXT. STREET The beachside street connects to a two-way road. A small car turns onto the road. 80 INT. CAR Roger is still smoking as he drives, and Mihoshi and Sasami are sitting in the back--wrapped with towels. ROGER: You had a good time? MIHOSHI: Oh, sure. Of course! SASAMI: It was lots of fun. Roger is grimly pleased, as he makes a turn. ROGER: Well, I'm glad. I just wish we all could have gone. MIHOSHI: (chuckling) Oh, yeah. ROGER: (concerned) Everything went all right? You didn't have any problems? Mihoshi suddenly stops chuckling. SASAMI: (reluctant) Well... 81 INT. MAIN HALL Tenchi returns with some tea, and sits at the table. Ryoko appears across from him, floating lazily. RYOKO: Tenchi, what happened to you? TENCHI: Huh? (looking at himself) Oh, this? (gesturing at his head) I just got a little careless. That's all. RYOKO: (annoyed) That blonde brute beat you up, didn't she? Tenchi picks up his tea. TENCHI: She just got a lucky punch. RYOKO: (not believing a word of it) Oh, sure. You don't have to put up with that, you know. TENCHI: (a little alarmed) What? RYOKO: (mimicking a punch) I can... fix it for you. TENCHI: (flaring with disgust) Ryoko! RYOKO: (gesturing for calm) All right! All right! Forget I said anything! Sheesh! Ryoko goes back to her perch, folding her arms. RYOKO: Men are such snobs! 82 INT. SHRINE Yosho gestures, as he sets his tea down--Lilian sitting across from him at the table. YOSHO: Tenchi faces his foes the same way he faces his friends. It was a difficult problem for me. LILIAN: You expected him to show his skill? YOSHO: (sighing) Tenchi's skills are abundantly tied to his fundamentals. Unfortunately, his fundamentals have been lacking, recently. There really wasn't any chance. I was hoping... LILIAN: (realizing) You wanted to see what else he was capable of. Yosho adjusts his glasses--a little nervous. YOSHO: Please forgive me, but I wanted to be certain of you, as well. LILIAN: (surprised) What? YOSHO: (picking up his tea) I think I underestimated you. Lilian doesn't quite seem sure how to take that, as Yosho sips some tea. YOSHO: Of course, as it turns out, I've discovered someone else who may be interested in your capabilities. LILIAN: Oh yeah? Who? Yosho waves, and a shadowy figure emerges--Kilaro. YOSHO: You were saying something about needing more security? KILARO: (agreeing) That's right. And that GP nitwit is almost never reliable. Just today, we had another situation-- Yosho sets the cup down again. YOSHO: (to Lilian) Well, are you still interested in working in space? Lilian looks at Kilaro, then back at Yosho--her eyes lighting up. YOSHO: (smiling, VO) Ah, to be young and naive! 83 INT. CAR Roger is casually frowning, as Mihoshi and Sasami look sheepish and embarrassed. MIHOSHI: It was an accident. I swear, I just looked away for a moment. SASAMI: We didn't mean to sink your boat. We're very sorry. ROGER: (still casually frowning) Forget about it. (softly) It's just not my day, today. 84 INT. MAIN HALL Ayeka enters, as Tenchi is still sitting at the table-- nursing his tea, and lightly touching his bruises. Ayeka is holding Ryo-Ohki, petting her, and sits across from Tenchi at the table. AYEKA: Tenchi, I have something to inform you of that is a bit unpleasant. Ryoko looks down from the beam, a little startled. RYOKO: (VO) Well, that's abrupt! TENCHI: (somber) You found out Sammy's rich? AYEKA: (a little surprised) Oh! That's precisely it. How did you know? TENCHI: (annoyed) I'm starting to have a knack for this. 85 INT. CAR Mihoshi looks a little worried. MIHOSHI: You won't tell anyone about this, will you? Roger looks startled for a moment. MIHOSHI: I'm sorry, but I hate to be thought of as a clutz. Sasami looks vastly surprised. ROGER: (brushing it off) No, no. It's nothing. Like I said. Forget about it. MIHOSHI: (relieved) Thanks a lot! I hate to be annoying, but I really am sorry! ROGER: (grimacing, VO) No, that's just me. Mr. Forget-it. 86 EXT. THIRD FLOOR BALCONY Tenchi and Ayeka appear, looking around, but they can't seem to find Samantha. Ayeka continues looking, as Tenchi examines the painting. AYEKA: Oh no! You don't think she killed herself? Tenchi looks away from the painting. TENCHI: Excuse me? Ayeka has a guilty look, gesturing downward. AYEKA: We'd see her body if she jumped, right? Somewhere down there. Tenchi looks at the painting again. TENCHI: She wouldn't do that, Ayeka. Samantha wasn't that upset. AYEKA: (rolling her eyes) Yes. Silly me. I'm sure she's just hiding somewhere. Ayeka goes back inside, as Tenchi looks at the painting, turns away again, then looks a little more closely. TENCHI: Whoa! Hands? The painting is a scenery shot of an ordinary tree, next to a lake. A very close-up look reveals a leaf of the tree--which contains several tiny hands. TENCHI: (amazed) How does she do that? 87 EXT. MASAKI HOUSE Early evening. 88 INT. ENTRANCE Noboyuki enters, glancing around. NOBOYUKI: Still doesn't feel right. 89 INT. MAIN HALL Tenchi, Roger and Ryo-Ohki (humanoid form) are sitting at the table, as Ayeka knits and Sasami and Ryoko are reading--Ryoko on her perch. Noboyuki enters, and is greeted by Ryo-Ohki. RYO-OHKI: Miya! TENCHI: Oh, hey Dad! You're off tomorrow? NOBOYUKI: Hello, Tenchi. No. Just taking a little time between jobs. TENCHI: Oh. NOBOYUKI: Hello, Roger. It's nice to see you again. Roger puzzles. TENCHI: (chuckling, to Roger) Sorry about this. (to Noboyuki) Dad, Roger was staying here at my invitation. I hope that's okay. NOBOYUKI: (shrugging) It's all right. Just, what's with the... Noboyuki gestures between Tenchi and Roger. TENCHI: I'm sorry, Dad, but Roger is from England. I'll have to translate. NOBOYUKI: You should charge him money for that. Tenchi chuckles again, and looks at Roger. TENCHI: Roger, this is my dad. He's says that it's okay for you to stay for dinner, if you want. ROGER: (a tired expression) No, that's okay. I only came here to drop off the girls and to see Samantha. I really wanted to talk to her, but I guess-- TENCHI: (sympathetic) She was really upset when I spoke to her. I don't know if she wants to talk to you, anyway. ROGER: (sighing) Well, that's all right. I should be leaving. Sasami and Ayeka are watching as Roger gets up to leave. NOBOYUKI: Leaving already? TENCHI: I guess so, Dad. ROGER: Let me know how things work out. TENCHI: (to Roger) Don't worry. I'm sure Samantha will tell you, herself. 90 INT. RYOKO'S ROOM Samantha is sitting at the edge of a bed, sketching in a pad, as Ryoko flickers and appears--looking very surprised. RYOKO: You! SAMANTHA: Huh? RYOKO: What are you doing in my room? SAMANTHA: (pleasantly surprised) This is your room? 91 INT. BALCONY Samantha is standing at the balcony outside Ryoko's bedroom door, holding her sketchpad, looking annoyed. SAMANTHA: Well. She didn't have to be rude about it. Tenchi emerges from the main hall stairs, noticing Samantha. TENCHI: Samantha? Where have you been? Samantha looks behind her for a moment, then looks back at Tenchi. SAMANTHA: I wasn't aware that this room was taken. TENCHI: Oh? SAMANTHA: (looking around) Where have the others gone? TENCHI: (thinking for a moment) Well, whenever Dad's not away at work, Mihoshi sleeps in Ayeka's room. So, they're probably clearing away some of Mihoshi's junk... Samantha leans against the railing, and Tenchi suddenly looks a little wistful. SAMANTHA: Roger left, didn't he? TENCHI: Yeah. He's going back to England. SAMANTHA: Not because of that princess--? TENCHI: No. I think he figured it out on his own. SAMANTHA: Now, he's pouting like a child. Tenchi glances at Samantha ruefully. TENCHI: He's expecting to hear from you, actually. SAMANTHA: (sighing) Tenchi... TENCHI: (mildly baffled) What? SAMANTHA: (trembling) I never expected him to give up. Samantha looks embarrassed, and Tenchi smiles at her. TENCHI: He seemed disappointed that you weren't here. SAMANTHA: But I'm not. Even if I had looked him in the eyes, he'd still be disappointed. TENCHI: What, because you're rich? SAMANTHA: Yes. You don't understand. Samantha turns from the railing to talk directly. SAMANTHA: I'm a totally different person, now. He can't play his little game of tag, now. Now, if I run away and spend a ton of his family's money, it means nothing to him. You know what I mean? TENCHI: (scratching his head) I think so. SAMANTHA: (sighing again) I'm so confused. Tenchi leans on the railing, still looking at Samantha. TENCHI: You care about him? SAMANTHA: Well... I guess so. TENCHI: So, what else matters? SAMANTHA: (irritated) Your simplistic assessment is very depressing. You realize that? TENCHI: (a little flippant) I'm just amazed at your painting technique. SAMANTHA: (flinching) Ack! You've seen the hands? TENCHI: (grinning) I could hardly believe my eyes, too. Samantha turns away for a moment, then gestures as she starts to plead. SAMANTHA: Don't tell anyone about that, please. TENCHI: I doubt I'll need to. It isn't the kind of thing one would notice unless you were looking for it. Why would I want to tell anyone? SAMANTHA: I trust you, then. TENCHI: (shrugging) Idiots tell no tails. 92 INT. NOBOYUKI'S ROOM Sasami, Mihoshi, Ryo-Ohki (humanoid form), and Noboyuki are standing around. Noboyuki seems to be looking for something. MIHOSHI: So, is Samantha leaving, too? SASAMI: Assuming she hasn't left already. NOBOYUKI: That would be too bad. I always enjoyed talking to her. MIHOSHI: (pleasantly surprised) She talked to you? NOBOYUKI: (wryly amused) Oh yeah. Well, she wouldn't glance my way when she was sober, but she would talk my ear off when she was drunk. SASAMI: (barely containing herself) So, did she tell you anything really personal? NOBOYUKI: (feigning shock) Personal? What do you mean? Mihoshi groans and Sasami giggles, as Noboyuki winks at them. MIHOSHI: There's so much we're dying to know! SASAMI: Really! NOBOYUKI: Really? Like what? MIHOSHI: How many boyfriends has she really had? SASAMI: Is she actually rich? MIHOSHI: What's with the self-portraits? NOBOYUKI: Self-portraits? SASAMI: (glancing at Mihoshi) She told me she only drew her own hand. NOBOYUKI: Oh. Yeah, they're there. MIHOSHI: (doubtful) You're kidding. Noboyuki looks around again, as he explains. NOBOYUKI: No, I'm not. It's part of her style. She uses little strokes that look like hands. You wouldn't see it, unless you knew what to look for. MIHOSHI: Oh, wow! SASAMI: Yeah, I guess that explains it. Wait a minute. Why does she act so creepy about it? She avoided Mihoshi after Mihoshi started talking about it. NOBOYUKI: Hmm. Yeah, I think I know about that. But it's confusing. SASAMI: (more curious than ever) What? NOBOYUKI: (pondering) All she would tell me was that when she went to her grandmother's funeral, she thought she saw her grandmother reach her hand up to her. I guess it must have scared her. MIHOSHI: (vacantly amazed) Wow! That is weird. SASAMI: (chuckling) What a silly thing to be afraid of! 93 EXT. OLD ENTRANCE SITE A shuttle flies out of a moonlit sky. Lilian and Kilaro escort the Beta ambassador out of the shuttle. 94 INT. AYEKA'S ROOM Ayeka is sound asleep, as Mihoshi and Sasami are staring up at the ceiling--too terrified to blink. SASAMI: (VO) Me and my big mouth! THE END