I don't own Tenchi Muyo, any of the characters or any of Washu's crazy inventions for that matter. I'm not exactly sure who owns them but I know that it's distributed in the U.S. by Pioneer. This fanfic is written without the consent of aforementioned owners and yadda yadda yadda. Note: Before you even read this I want to warn you of two things. First, Mihoshi is 100% completely out of character. That's the whole point of the fic. Second, this fic ignores some of the facts in OAVs. Can't be helped. This fic is merely a "what if" fic and nothing more. Black Ops Assassin Mihoshi The Masaki household was in the middle of the mid-day meal when Mihoshi's multi-purpose wrist contraption started beeping. Ryoko gazed at Mihoshi's wrist. "That thing gets annoying after a while, sometimes I regret fixing it." Mihoshi pushed away from the table and stood up. "I'm sorry everyone but an emergency has come up." The blonde detective turned to Sasami. "Thanks for a wonderful lunch, princess. I'll be back as soon as I can." "You're welcome, Mihoshi," Sasami said with a smile. "Please be careful out in space, Mihoshi." "You can count on me," Mihoshi said as she reached into her hair and retrieved her control cube. With a twist of the cube she was in her Galaxy Police uniform. "Bye everyone." With another twist she was gone from the room. "It's too bad, her getting called away right in the middle of eating," Sasami said. "It's ok, Sasami," Tenchi told her. "We can save some leftovers for her and she can have it when she gets back." Ayeka turned to her sister. "Don't fret, Sasami, I'm sure that Mihoshi will be just fine." "Yeah, I suppose so," Sasami said. "I just remember what happened the last time Mihoshi went off on an emergency call." Washu shuddered. "Sasami has a point. Maybe I should keep an eye on Mihoshi. For her own good, of course." "How are you going to do that?" Ryoko asked. "It's a good thing that I'm The Greatest Scientific Genius In The Universe!" Washu said with a laugh. "Here we go again," Ryoko said, rolling her eyes and heaving a sigh. "Tell me about it," Ayeka agreed. "I had already been curious about Mihoshi," Washu admitted. "So I bugged her shuttle. It should be a snap to find out what's going on." "You bugged her shuttle!?" Tenchi exclaimed. "Little Washu, that's an invasion of privacy. Not too mention I'm sure it's against the law to bug an officer's space ship." "Hey, it's all in the interest of science," Washu said. "Right, just like having Tenchi tied up without much in the way of clothes on was in the interest of science," Ryoko growled. "What? You're still upset about that?" Washu asked the blue haired space pirate. "I could care less what you did with Mihoshi's shuttle," Ryoko said. "Just keep your hands off my Tenchi!" "Pardon me, monster woman, but he certainly is not "your Tenchi"," Ayeka objected. "There they go again," Sasami said and sighed. "They *are* a pain sometimes aren't they, Sasami?" Washu said, watching the growing arguement between the elder princess and the galaxy's most famous ex-criminal. The diminutive scientist took Sasami's hand. "Forget them, we'll keep an eye on Mihoshi ourselves. Ok?" "Ok," Sasami said. She picked up Ryo-ohki. "You want to help too, don't you, Ryo-ohki?" "Miya!" Mihoshi appeared in the shuttle's cockpit to find that Yukinojo was already waiting for her. "Glad to see you could make it in a timely manner this time, Mihoshi," Yukinojo said. "What's the emergency, Yukinojo?" Mihoshi asked. "It's a message from headquarters," Yukinojo answered. "Please play the message for me, Yukinojo," Mihoshi said. "I'm afraid I can't," the computer AI replied. "The message is marked "ultra top secret". It needs to go through decryption first." "Top secret, huh?" Mihoshi said, looking down at her wrist computer. "Ok, run the decryption program. While I'm waiting I might as well have some coffee." Mihoshi twisted the control cube several times. A moment later a cup of coffee materialized in front of the blonde detective. "Alright, I finally got the cube to materialize me a cup of coffee!" However, her victory was short lived as she knocked the cup over onto the control console. In her lab Washu chuckled as she watched Mihoshi spill her coffee. She stopped chuckling when she realized that the coffee had shorted out one of the bugs she had put in the shuttle cockpit. "Glad to see that you're gracefull as always," Yukinojo said, eyeing the coffee spill. "I'll go get something to clean the mess up with," Mihoshi said. She turned to leave the cockpit and smashed her knee into her chair. >From there the detective limped out of the cockpit, only to trip at the doorway and smack her head against wall. "I don't believe it," Washu snarled as she watched the feed from two more bugs die. Fifteen minutes and twenty one bugs later Washu watched the last screen turn to snow. "That was all of them?" Sasami asked, turning to Washu. "Yeah, I can hardly believe it myself," Washu said. "How did she manage to knock out all TWENTY FOUR bugs!?" "She's just lucky, I guess," Sasami said. "Lucky!?" Washu said, pulling her hair. She called up her holo-computer and began typing. "There," she said a few minutes later. "I just calculated the odds of Mihoshi knocking out all twenty four bugs by complete accident." "So, what are they, Washu?" Sasami asked. "One in two trillion, five hundred sixty eight billion, nine hundred eleven million, seven hundred three thousand, two hundred and twenty eight," Washu replied. "There's no way that it was all accidental." "So Mihoshi destroyed your bugs on purpose?" Sasami asked. "Why would she do that?" "Yeah, that's crazy," Washu said. "There's no way that someone as bubbleheaded as Mihoshi has the awareness neccessary to know about those bugs. Nevermind the ability to take them all out intentionally." "She's something else, huh?" Sasami said. Washu scratched her chin. "Maybe there really is more to Mihoshi then meets the eye." "You really think so, Washu?" Sasami asked. Washu burst out with laughter. "No way! Mihoshi is as clueless as they come. It's *gotta* be all a freak accident." Mihoshi looked at her wrist device. "According to the detector that was the last of them," she told Yukinojo. "Twenty four bugs. I think that's a bit excessive," the ship AI replied. "Washu went overboard alright, my knees are killing me," Mihoshi said. "Ok, Yukinojo, please play the message for me." "Right away, Mihoshi," Yukinojo said. The screen activated. Mihoshi recognized the sender of the message instantly. It was none other than her grandfather, the Galaxy Police Marshal. "Hello, Mihoshi. I hope this message finds you doing well an in good health," the Marshal said before pausing for a moment. The Marshal looked away from the screen for a moment before resuming. "I'm afraid that something very important and very dangerous has developed. Something that requires your expert services. I can't go into detail right now because of the danger that this message could get intercepted. Along with this message Yukinojo should have received set of instructions for a rendezvous. Good luck." The screen went blank. Mihoshi turned to Yukinojo's personality interface. "Did you receive the set of instructions he mentioned." "Yes I did Mihoshi," Yukinojo answered. "Should I put them on screen?" "Yes, please," Mihoshi said. Yukinojo promptly complied and Mihoshi read the instructions over carefully and then sighed. "Planet Carisae, huh? My grandfather has a weird sense of humor," Mihoshi said. "Carisae? The pirate world?" Yukinojo said. "Pirate world?" Mihoshi scoffed. "I've been there before. Believe me, there aren't any space pirates there. Drug smugglers and petty cut-throats, yes. Pirates, no." "Your orders, Mihoshi?" Yukinojo asked. Mihoshi closed her eyes. "All possible speed to Carisae," the blonde said relunctantly. Mihoshi stepped out of the shuttlehatch and on to the flat black surface of the shuttle port's landing pad. "Of course he'd want to meet in the middle of the night," Mihoshi grumbled as she peered into the dark gloom that hung over the shuttle port. "Guess there's no help for it. Might as well get it over with." Within a few minutes Mihoshi had left the confines of Carisae's small rundown shuttle port and entered an even more run down neighborhood of dives and slumholes. As she was walking down a side street a door to a rather tattered looking beer garden burst open, letting noise, light, smoke and three men escape into the world outside. Mihoshi walked past, ignoring the three men. She had never been one for enjoying the nightlife, especially on a planet like Carisae. On top of that she wanted to get this meeting with her grandfather over with. These special assignments were never pleasant and always dangerous. In her gut she felt a deep sense of dread. Something told her that this particular assignment was going to be the most difficult of her career and she wanted to confront whatever it was as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, the three men she walked past were unwilling to ignore her. "Hey, babe, looking sweet tonight," one of the men, a self-fancied tough said, leering at Mihoshi's backside. "Shove off, punk," Mihoshi said curtly, not even slowing down. "You definitely don't want any of this." One of the other men piped up. "Oh, I think we do. We want plenty of that." Even as Mihoshi kept walking the first man to speak darted forward and grabbed Mihoshi's arm, jerking her backwards. Mihoshi didn't attempt to resist or even turn around. She simply let herself stumble backwards into her assailant. A split-second later the heel of her boot slammed into his unprotected shin. He went down with a yelp and clutched his shin. The other two men leapt into action. "That's gonna cost you, slut!" one of them snarled as they rushed her. She spun around and slammed her knuckles into the throat of the closest attacker. A small smile tugged at her lips as the man stumbled backwards with both hands at his throat. She ducked a blow from the third attacker that would have shattered her jaw had it connected. She whipped her arm around and a thin wire shot out to wrap itself around her attacker's neck from a small device under Mihoshi's wrist. All thoughts of attacking the blonde were forgotten as the man tried to free himself from the thin wire. Mihoshi calmly watched as the man was suddenly on the receiving end of a twenty ampere jolt. The wire obediently retracted even as the man's corpse fell to the ground. By this time Mihoshi's first attacker had regained his feet. Quickly sizing up the situation he realized the fact that the better part of valor was exactly what was called for. As he desperately ran away from the blonde Galaxy Police officer she produced a small knife from under her jacket and sent it whipping down the street after the fleeing man. The would-be attacker cried out as he felt the knife plunge into his back. He managed to take another three steps before collapsing onto the ground. "That really is some fast acting poison," Mihoshi said with satisfaction as she turned to walk away. Mihoshi looked up at the blinking neon sign. "The Good Times Bar, huh? This is the place alright," she said, rolling her eyes. She stepped off of the curb and walked across the street towards the bar. "Look, I'm having fun already." Inside the place reeked of stale beer and smoke. She scanned the crowd looking for the person she came to meet. She spotted him in a small booth sitting by himself. He smiled at her as she sat down on the other side of the booth's small table. "Glad you could make it," he said. "Sorry I'm a bit late, Grandfather," Mihoshi said. "I had a run-in with a few of the locals." "Oh? And what did you do?" the Galaxy Police Marshal asked . "The very first rule in the assassin handbook is to never leave survivors," Mihoshi replied. "Handbook?" the Marshal said with a chuckle. "I see that your time on Earth hasn't dulled that dry wit." He took a small sip from his drink. "Care for a drink?" "No thanks," Mihoshi replied. "I'd prefer that we get down to business." "As you wish," her grandfather said. "Let me start off by saying that this mission comes at the request of the King of Jurai himself." "Asuza?" Mihoshi said in surprise. "Yes," her grandfather confirmed. "There have been some recent events that he feels could destabilize Jurai if something isn't done to rectify the situation." "So, who am I supposed to assassinate this time?" Mihoshi asked. The Galaxy Police marshal was slightly taken aback. "Right to the knitty gritty, eh? Alright then, I believe you'll recognize the person in this photo." He slid a small envelope across the table to Mihoshi. She picked up the envelope and pulled out the photo in question. She gasped when she saw the face in the photo. "You can't be serious!" "Oh, but I'm afraid I am," the Marshal replied mildly. "But why? He's only a boy," Mihoshi protested. "How is he a threat to Jurai?" "Surely you should know the answer to that," her grandfather said. "He may be only a boy but he's also a claimant to the throne. One that Asuza doesn't want." "But..." Mihoshi trailed off with a look from her grandfather. "So you developed feelings for this boy," the Marshal observed. "Is this going to prevent you from carrying out this assignment?" Mihoshi felt a chill run down her back and the hairs on the back of her neck stood up. She knew that her surviving this meeting was dependent on her immediate reaction. "No sir, not at all. I would never let personal feelings get in the way of my professional duty." "Good girl," the Marshal said with a smile. "Now let us get down to specifics." Mihoshi nodded and leaned over the table towards her grandfather, scooting herself forward on the booth's benchseat. Even as she listened to the Marshal's instructions the fingers of her right hand were searching a hidden pantspocket. The Marshal retrieved the envelope and photo and put them back inside an inner pocket inside his jacket. "I'm leaving the particulars of how you pursue this mission up to your discretion. However, there is no need to hurry this. Wait until you can safely eliminate the boy without suspicion falling on you." Mihoshi nodded. "Yes sir, you can rely on me." "You also have two secondary targets, the scientist and her daughter," the Galaxy Police marshal said. "But that's..." Mihoshi said and then went silent. She knew that arguing here would avail nothing and only bring danger to herself. "Yes, Mihoshi? Please say what's on your mind," the Marshal said. "But that's going to complicate matters," Mihoshi told him. "Yes, I know that," her grandfather said. "That's why they are only secondary targets. If it proves impossible to take them out then forget them. Just make sure you take out the boy." "Yes sir," Mihoshi replied even as her fingers found the object she desired. "Of the two secondary targets the scientist is the more important one, remember that when the time comes." "Do you have instructions for what I'm supposed to do when the mission is over?" Mihoshi asked, leaning in over the table even further. "Yes," her grandfather answered. He looked down at his jacket and reached into a pocket, "They're right..." The Marshal stopped talking as he felt something jab into his knee. With a sudden realization he looked up at his granddaughter. He lunged forward but it was already too late. His hips hit the edge of the table and he was bounced back onto the benchseat. "Mihoshi, how could you?" Mihoshi watched as the Galaxy Police Marshal slumped into the booth seat, held upright by the wall. A quick glance around showed that no one was particularly paying attention to them. She looked at her grandfather's corpse. "How could *I*? How could *you* ask me to assassinate the people I've come to think of as family?" She stood up, threw a couple of coins on the table and then walked out of the bar and into the darkness of night. _________________________ There you have it, the first part of what I imagine will be a two parter. Maybe three if I suddenly get wordy.