*A small apartment in Okayama a guy and girl are sat arguing about fics*

Yakuza : you do the disclaimer.
Y2S : Fraid not it's your turn
Yakuza : learn grammar
Y2S : learn how to get a girlfriend
Yakuza : Slut
Y2S : Virgin
Yakuza : Bitch
Y2S : Otaku
Yakuza : What?
Y2S : Japanesse words... heh heh heh cookie-san, Onimusha, Kame Hame Hah
Yakuza : Can you class those as Japanesse words
Y2S : Yes now do the disclaimer and.... I'll let you feel my ass
Yakuza : hmm okay. Tenchi and all the etc stuff doesn't belong to either of
us and the fic doesn't belong to us either it belongs to Matt Jasek who is
an actual quite good fan fic writer who I doubt will finish this fic.
Y2S : Hmmm aren't there supposed to be more than one person doing the fic
then??
Yakuza : shut up and hand me the video
Y2S : okay but don't you think this is a little perfectic everyone else has
like spaceships and projectors and we get a smallish Sony Tv and a video
rented from Blockfics.
Yakuza : I told you to get "Kiyone and Mihoshi lesbiens in space"
Y2S : Sorry i couldn't find a co... heh wait i'm a girl.
Yakuza : shut up it's starting.

Unwelcome guest - chap 1: "Odd news"

        It was a typical morning the Masaki residence.  All was quite except
for the rattling in the kitchen as Sasami fixed breakfast.  Tenchi, Ayeka,
Ryoko, and the rest were still sleeping; exhausted from the hectic day they
had yesterday.

Yakuza : I'm sensing mass orgy activity
Y2S : (spaceship voice) detection correct sir going into horny mode...

Tenchi awoke as the sun warmed his face.  He sat up and stretched.  Looking
around tiredly he wondered what day it was, what time it was, and where he
was.  He had a pounding headache from the night before.
        “I shouldn’t have drunk whatever that was Ryoko gave me last night.”

Y2S : hmmm I think Ryoko might have spiked the drink
Yakuza : mmm Ryoko is cute... or sexy or some other word like that.
Y2S : shut u... hey look we're floating and the tape is leaving.
Yakuza : wow suprising i never noticed... *tape pops out of video and the
object and the two sex obsessed teens appeared on a ship*
Washu : Welcome to "The H.M.S MST"
Yakuza : original name.. *both were unceremoniously (damn i can't spell)
dropped*
Both : ow
Washu : because of you Y2S not finishing your story...
Y2S : I'm getting round to it
Washu : ...and you Yakuza taking pics of Tsunami...
Yakuza : they were for the site
Washu : ... I have decided to keep you here and make you watch fics
Both : do we get free food
Washu : no
Both : damn
Video is popped into an exact replica of Yakuza and Y2S' video recorder.

He
muttered to himself as he made his way out of his room and down the stairs.
It looked to be another beautiful day outside.  The sun was shining and
there were hardly any clouds in the sky whatsoever.
        “Morning, Tenchi!”  Sasami cheerfully called when she saw him.
        “Morning.”  Tenchi gave a small smile but quickly stopped when he
found
talking made his head hurt even worse.

*both Yakuza and Y2S sat in two convinently placed seats.*
Yakuza : serves ya right for saying morning.
Y2S : Is this a lemon
Yakuza : no.. the lemon section was cut off by our good friend Mr. Cable
Internet
Y2S : Who?
Yakuza : Uk phone company

        “Are you okay?”  Sasami saw him grimace and came over nervously.
        “Just a headache.”  He said with a small smile.
        “Well, you just sit right there while I go and get you something for
it.”
Sasami pushed him gently on the couch and went upstairs.

Y2S : and then Tenchi started screaming because he was in a terrible state
and had just been unceremoniously thrown on the couch.
Yakuza : you like that word don't you?
Y2S : the short answer is a yes with a but but the long answer is a no with
a however
Yakuza : you said butt heh heh ...

Tenchi put his head in his hands and moaned, “That’s the last time I
let
Ryoko talk me into something.”
        “Well I’m glad to see you too darling.”   Ryoko materialized next to
him
and wrapped her arms around him.  “And thanks for that wonderful evening
last night.”  She gave a small laugh and kissed his cheek.
        “Huh?  What are you talking about?”  Tenchi pulled away and looked
at her.

Y2S : fool she's obviously saying that "you were great at sex last night"
Yakuza : yea Tenchi couldn't have sex even if he was drunk.
Y2S : why?
Yakuza : lets just say all the blood comes out of his nose in those
situations
Y2S : you stole that from another MST
Yakuza : rip off specialists aren't we *high fives all round*

“Me?  Oh, nothing, nothing at all, dear.”  She laughed and floated
up.
        “Dear?  What are you talking about?”  Tenchi stood up but quickly
fell back
onto the couch, his head pounded even worse than before.
        “Oh, you poor baby.”  Ryoko floated back down onto the coach, “Don’t
worry
you’ll get used to it.”
        “Used to what?”  Tenchi looked at her.
        “Drinking with me.”  She said putting her arm around him.
        “I’m never drinking anything with you again!”  Tenchi groaned as his
yelling made his headache worse, “I can’t remember anything about last
night!”

Y2S : Man we should get some of that tea must be strong
Yakuza : you should try English bear
Y2S : bear? isn't that the spelling for the "grrr" kind of bear
Yakuza : be quite you dominatrix wannabe.
Y2S : quite?

“Really?”  Ryoko pulled back a bit, “That’s a shame you said some
very
interesting things last night.”  She grinned an evil little grin, leaned
close and whispered in his ear, “And you did some even more interesting
things.”
        “What!!”  Tenchi sat up and the grabbed his head, “Ouch!  My head”
        Ryoko laughed and floated away, “Where’s breakfast I’m starving?”

Yakuza : Tenchi screwed Ryoko... oh my god
*Censor robots enter and beat Yakuza sensless leaving him hanging upside
down from his chair with a large lump on his head.*
Yakuza : ow?
Washu : the censor bots are here to keep this non-lemony
Y2S : mmmm lemon fresh fan fic

She
walked into the kitchen.
        Sasami came back downstairs followed by Ayeka.
        “Here you go, Tenchi.”  Sasami said handing him a small glass of
liquid.
        “What’s this?”  Tenchi asked as he studied it.

Yakuza : heroin
Y2S : ecstacy
Washu : some kind of sulphuric acid
Both : Tenchi's on acid?

        “It’s Ryuoh’s sap.”

Yakuza : i knew that

         She said smiling, “It will cure anything.”
        “Sasami!  Where’s breakfast?”  Ryoko’s head appeared from the
kitchen.
        “Sorry, It’s almost done.”  Sasami ran into the kitchen.
        Tenchi drank the liquid and found himself feeling better almost
immediately.  “How are you this morning, miss Ayeka?”  Tenchi asked.
        “I’m not talking to you!”  Ayeka turned her nose up and walked
towards the
kitchen.

Yakuza : (posh voice) oh la de da it's the queen of England
Y2S : (an equally lame posh voice) Oh please Tenchi scr£w me in the ear.
Yakuza : woah .... cool
Y2S : hah the censor bots don't hit you if you use stars and crap.

        “What? Why?”  Tenchi got up and went after her, “What’s wrong?”
        “What’s Wrong?”  Ayeka turned on him, “You spent all of last night
with
that demon woman, doing god only knows what.  That’s what’s wrong.”  She
began walking towards the kitchen and then turned again, “And the way you
acted last night was just uncalled for!”  She stomped into the kitchen

Y2S : flee for your lives it's the giant snob
Yakuza : gotta love the stereo typically Ayeka
Y2S : I prefere the OOC Ayeka
Yakuza : hmm... note to self write fan fic about an OOC Ayeka and an OOC
Tenchi..... note to self buy batteries for tape recorder.... note to self
buy taperecorder

Tenchi scratched his head, “What did I do last night?”  He wondered
aloud.
        “Always a laugh to be had here.”  Washu came out of her lab.
Looking
towards the kitchen.  “And as for what you did last night, Tenchi.  I
believe she is referring to the way that you and Ryoko were hanging all over
each other.”

Yakuza : mmm hanging
Y2S : mmm over each other

“We were?”  Tenchi got a little scared, “I don’t remember that at
all!”
        “Of course not.”  Washu laughed.  “That’s what you get for
drinking!”
Washu yelled behind her as she walked into the kitchen.
        Tenchi shook his head, “Great, now I’m going to have to deal with
this all
day.”

Yakuza : not really there's a gap coming up sensing that there will be a
time gap.

After an uncomfortably silent breakfast, Tenchi went to the fields
to do
his daily chores, Washu went back into the lab, Sasami and Ayeka began
cleaning up, and Ryoko lay up on the roof.  The rest of the day passed as
usual with nothing exciting happening; amazingly Ryoko and Ayeka didn’t
fight once all day.  As they gathered around the dinner table Tenchi
apologized to Ayeka and everyone else for the way he acted last night.
Mihoshi and Kiyone got back from their patrol with the galaxy police.
Everyone was enjoying a nice evening when Yosho stood up and announced, “We
are going to be having a visitor for a while."

Yakuza : oh great is this a created charecter who is REALLY heroic and SUPER
cool and is based on the authour.
Y2S : Jason comes to mind
Yakuza : hah you're wrong cos now i'm turning that into a self insert.
Y2S : aww self inserts suck

“Huh?”  They all said together.
        “Who?”  Tenchi asked.
        “Why?”  Sasami asked.
        “It’s not a girl is it?”  Ryoko and Ayeka both asked.

Yakuza : it's not a girl striper is it?
Y2S : it's not Kagato is it?
Washu : no it's not you pratts now get on witht he MSTing
Both : we areeeee

“It’s an exchange student from America.  Apparently he is a history
major
and is doing a project on the legend behind the Masaki shrine.”

Yakuza : actually he's a created charecter in a fan fic.

“America?”  Washu looked puzzled, “Why is he coming here though?
Surely he
could use the internet and all the other resources in the U.S. to find out
all the information he needs.”
        “Probably.”  Yosho said, “But he wanted to interview the caretakers
and ask
them about the legend firsthand.  His school contacted me and told me about
his request, and I said it would be fine and that he could stay here as long
as he wants."

Yakuza : I think he's gonna fall in love with Ryoko
Washu : you've read it already...
Y2S : bet ya $5 that he picks Ryoko
Yakuza : you're on

“As long as he wants?”  Ryoko looked sharply at Yosho, “So what are
we all
supposed to do while he’s here?  We can’t let him know who we really are.”
        “So you don’t.”  Yosho said sitting back down, “Don’t use your
powers and
don’t do anything too suspicious."

Yakuza : why not he probabley knows everything about Jurai and crap and if
you tell him from the get go we can skip the second and third chapters which
are "charecter building" episodes where the created charecter finds out.
Y2S : You skipped with yours by doing the "come straight out about knowing"
Yakuza : great isn't it

“If he’s coming here all the way from America he will probably want
to stay
here for a while.”  Ayeka said looking around, “You don’t have any idea how
long he might stay here?”
        “Sorry I didn’t ask.”  Yosho said without looking up.
        “Wow, someone from America!”  Mihoshi said eagerly looking around,
“This’ll
be great.”

Yakuza : little did Mihoshi know he was actually.. dun dun dun .. a gay
Y2S : eek no say it aint so

“Just as long as you don’t tell him we’re galaxy police.”  Kiyone
said
giving Mihoshi a hard look.
        “Oh, I won’t do that.”  Mihoshi said laughing, “I can keep a secret
you
know.”

Yakuza : wow mihoshi and Kiyone get lines in this fic ad kiyone isn't the
main charecter who dates Tenchi *coughwhichisaloadofballs*
Y2S : yeah

“I haven’t seen you yet.”  Kiyone muttered into her tea.
        “Where is this kid going to sleep?”  Ryoko asked, “We already have
people
sharing rooms as it is.  Sasami and Ayeka, Mihoshi and Kiyone.  There aren’t
any spare rooms in the house!”
        “Well then,” Yosho said looking up at Ryoko, “Since you’re not
sharing your
room with anyone.”  Yosho trailed off.

Yakuza : how can you trail off with a full stop. This is trailing off......
Y2S : $5 please
Yakuza : will you take £'s
Y2S : short answer yes with a but long answer no with a however
Yakuza : you suck
Y2S : you didn't mind that last night
*instant blushing on the part of Yakuza*

“What!”  Ryoko yelled leaning forward, “You can’t possibly want me
to share
my room with him!”
        “Yea, that’ll work!”  Washu began laughing, “Ryoko has trouble
putting up
with herself!  How is she going to handle someone else?”
        “What was that, Mom?”  Ryoko said glaring angrily at Washu.
        “Hehe, nothing at all dear.”  Washu said smiling nervously.
        “Well then it’s settled.”  Yosho said standing up, “He’ll stay with
Ryoko,

Both : and marry her like created charecters do

Tenchi you are going to show him around, and teach him about the shrine.”
        “What?”  Tenchi spit out his tea, “Why me?  You know more about the
shrine
than I do.  You’re the caretaker!”
        “Yes, but you are training to replace me.  Consider this a test of
your
knowledge.”  Yosho said walking away from the table.
        “When is he coming?”  Sasami asked.
        “He should be here sometime tomorrow morning.”  Yosho said
continuing to
walk away.

Y2S : or the next chapter... or maybe even as quick as the next start of a
paragraph.

“What?”  They all said as one.
        “A little notice might have been nice!”  Ryoko yelled as he walked
away.
        “You have almost 15 hours of notice.”  Yosho said.
        “What’s his name?”  Tenchi yelled.
        But Yosho was already out of the house and Tenchi got no reply.
        “Great, just great.” Ryoko muttered.
        “This does seem rather strange.”  Ayeka commented.
        Sasami began clearing the dishes; “Well I think it’ll be a good
learning
experience for us all.  We’ve never talked to anyone outside of this house.
Let alone someone from another country.”
        “Yea, but it is kind of odd that someone from America would display
an
interest in such a small shrine like this one.”  Washu said.
        “Yea,” Tenchi said, “there are plenty of other shrines across Japan
that
are all bigger than this one.”

Washu : man he made me seem so dumb I would have figured it all out now and
Tenchi would be waiting to go lighthawk wing *smash boom whoosh* end of the
story.
Yakuza : er duh I cant see a set-up der even though I'm the great
genius.. der
*Washu glares at Yakuza as Y2S makes several snoring noises*

“Well I’m going to get some sleep and not worry about this right
now.”

Yakuza : just like Y2S

Kiyone stood up, “You should too, Mihoshi, we’ve got a busy day tomorrow as
it is.”

Yakuza : here comes the lemon bit. Mihoshi and Kiyone have an early night
and then the day after have a busy day... having sex
Y2S : who said sex

“Yea, you’re right.”  Mihoshi stood up and stretched, “Goodnight
everyone.”
  She said as her and Kiyone headed upstairs to their room.

Yakuza : for sex no doubt... hey guess what it is a lemon
Y2S : reaaaaaaly woooooow... *snore*
Yakuza : sex
Y2S : who said sex?

“Well this certainly turned out to be a strange day.”  Ayeka said.
        “Yea, and I thought for once I’d get a quiet normal day.”  Tenchi
said.
        “I don’t like this.”  Ryoko said.
        “That’s just because you have to share your room.”  Ayeka said
smiling,
“It’s about time you had to do what the rest of us do.  Honestly, it’s like
you think you’re special or something.”
        “Well excuse me for not being a snot nosed princess.”  Ryoko said
standing
up.

Everyone : Sterotypical fight.. *groan*

What!  What did you call me?”  Ayeka stood up to meet the
challenge.
        “You heard me you brat!”  Ryoko growled.
        Energy began to collect at Ryoko’s hands, and Ayeka began to have
the Jurai
blocks circling her.
        “Try me.” Ryoko snapped.
        “It seems you forgot what happened last time you challenged me
demon!”
        “Well why don’t you remind me?”
        “Girls!  Please!”  Tenchi planted himself in between the two. “You
two are
fighting over nothing!”  You looked at Ayeka and then Ryoko, “If you’re
going to fight at least wait until you have something to fight about!
Besides, you better get used to not using your powers.  There’s no telling
how long this guy will be here for.”

Y2S : it would have beene asier to calm them by going "Orgy in my room"
Yakuza : that's not calm
Y2S : remember Tenchi can't keep it up *spots censor robots powering up* ..
er I mean keep his er... game score up
Yakuza : why don't they attack when you sad orgee with a y

“He’s right.”  Ayeka said calming down.
        “Yea.”  Ryoko let the energy dissipate.
        Tenchi sighed, “Thank you.”
        “I’m going to sleep.”  Ryoko said, “This’ll be last night I get my
room to
myself for a while.”
        Tenchi and Ayeka watched Ryoko walk up the stairs.
        “I wonder why she’s so touchy about this?”  Ayeka said after Ryoko
was out
of sight.

Y2S : cos she's going to go out with her.

“I don’t know.”  Tenchi said; he turned to Ayeka with a serious
face, “But
please don’t rub it in, okay?  I don’t want a fight when that guy is here.”
        “Alright.  Goodnight, Tenchi.”  Ayeka walked up the stairs,
        “’Night.”  Tenchi said.
        He walked over to the sliding glass door and looked at the stars.
“America.”  He said looking.

Y2S : what about America? YOU WANT A PIECE OF ME?
Yakuza : eek the wrath of a slut
Y2S : BRING IT BITCH

Okay well that was my first fan-fic ever.  So e-mail me any thoughts good or
bad.  I have it based in the Ova world in case you didnt figure that out, i
just threw kiyone in because she should be there, hey she was in the mihoshi
special after all.
anyway on to chap 2!!

Yakuza : bzzz point (1) Kiyone should be there? Well the first episodes were
good without her why spoil the mixture of Tenchi Muyo for a mixture used in
Tenchi Universe which was worse. Bzzz point (2) The Mihoshi special was
crap,stupid and pointless it had no meaning no relisation and they should
have put the time and effort from that on the proper OAV universe. Bzzz
point (3) if you have Kiyone in it may be hard to notice the fact that it's
OAV.
Y2S : YOU GO GIRLFRIEND
Yakuza : boyfriend, boyfriend
Washu : hey are you guys an item
Both : nope absolutley not

Mihoshi : Do not read the next MST unless you enjoyed this then... stab your
head with an ice pick OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAAAIN *trips over
the and overs* owww.

After math -

Yakuza is running around attacking doors while Y2S is flirting with the
censor bots.

Washu : next time we'll be MSTing A VERY TENCHI CHRISTMAS but only the first
part because I cant be bothered doing the rest.
Y2S : so when did you first start censoring
Yakuza : DIEEEEE YOU MOTHER F****** DOOR IYEEEEE *smack*
Washu : why did this MST have to be these two bakas... maybe I should invite
some other anime charecters like Goku.... *drifts into fantasie*

Goku : Miss. Washu It's lucky I got here and saved you from the evil Cell
Washu : oh Goku.....

narrator : WHAT IS WASHU'S FASINATION WITH GOKU? HOW WILL YAKUZA AND Y2S
SURVIVE SEEING AS HOW THERE IS NO FOOD AND WATER IN THAT ROOM? WHAT HAPPENED
TO THE LEMON SECTION AT BLOCKFIC

Yakuza : that's what I want to know?

narrator : ER.. YEA.. IS THE CAPITAL LOCK STUCK? OH IT IS... TUNE IN NEXT
TIME SAME BAT CHANNEL SAME BAT PLACE SAME BAT TIME... ER I MEAN THE NEXT
CHAPTER......

*batman theme music*

The real us : we're not an item we're not THAT dumb and Yakuza does live in
Uk. Y2S is a girl Yakuza a guy neither is a slut or a fool. Matt Jasek
author of this fic is a brilliant authour and the unwelcome guest story is
brilliant and i recommend it. No offence meant in this it's all just a
laugh.