Hello, my friends! I am the Mirror Knight (better known as Rick Everts in your world)! I've decided to dive into the world of MSTing things to amuse everyone (except the writers, who are at my door with pitchforks and torches as I type)! I came across this little Tenchi/MiB crossover. Thinking what a challenge this would be, I decided that it needed a little MSTing! Enjoy! Oh, by the way, all the legal junk?, All material of or relating to *Tenchi Muyo!* are copyrighted by Pioneer LD and AIC. All material of or relating to *Men in Black* are copyrighted by Marvel/Malibu Comics and Columbia/Tristar Pictures. All material of or relating to "Evil Pii" or "Nerti" are copyrighted to William Benjamin Grilliette. The plot line and events contained within this fan fiction are copyrighted to William Benjamin Grilliette. plus the name Mirror Knight is copyrighted by me. Oh, plus all MST3k characters belong to Best Brains. Any products mentioned in the MSTing are somebody elses, things said about them are my own opinion. Don't sue me, I'm in college and therefore don't have any money. All that you could get from me is Anime tapes (and everyone owns the ones I have). It's just your standard day on SOL. Mike and the 'bots are eating some lunch (cold sesame noodles and some sweet and sour pork). Mike: Hey guys, I was digging in the back of the fridge and I found some fortune cookies! Tom and Crow: Hey cool! Mike hands out a fortune cookie to the bots and digs one out for himself. Mike: What does yours say, Crow? Crow: "Those who follow the path of truth, follow honor." Mike: Oooohhh! Tom: Heavy! Crow: What does yours say, Tom? Tom: Uh, hold on. (Tom crushes the cookie with his bottom) Um, "Time flows like a river, and history repeats." Crow: Yours sucks, Servo! Tom: Not as bad as yours, beak face! Crow: Oh yeah?! Tom: YEAH! Mike stands between the two robots. Mike: Hold on, you two, let me read mine, then you can see that both of yours suck. Tom and Crow: All right...HEY!! Mike: (Opens cookie) It says, "You will soon feel true pain..." Tom: Huh? Wonder what that means? A light flashes on the table. Mike: Hey, Pearl's calling! Crow: (shivers) Oooooh! How errie! Cut to the inside of Castle Forrester. Brain Guy and Bobo are in the background, messing with a computer. Pearl stands in front of the camera. Pearl: Well, Nelson, I see you survived yet another movie. Well, I have a plan to give you MAXIMUM PAIN! Back to SOL Mike: Oh, what is it? A 50's monster flick marathon? Back to Castle F Pearl: Nope! No movies for you this time! Behold! (Pearl steps out of the way and smiles evilly to reveal Brain Guy and Bobo playing an online game of Duke Nukem. Back to SOL Tom: You're going to make us play Duke Nukem against Brain Guy and Bobo? Crow: I go first! Back to Castle F Pearl's smile disappears. She turns around to see what they're talking about BG: What are you doing, you stupid ape?! If you use the rocket launcher that close... Bobo: Back off bowl boy! Pearl: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!!?!? BG and Bobo: Wahhh! Pearl: You are SUPPOSED to bring up that Tenchi Fan Fic site! BG: Um, sorry. BG immediately brings up the Tenchi Muyo Fan Fic site. Pearl: Ok, now behold! Back to SOL Mike: Oh wow! A Tenchi Muyo site! Tom: Big deal, you goin' to show us a Tenchi Web site. Back to Castle F Pearl: Not just any Tenchi site! It's a Fan Fic site! Where people with no life go and make up their own stories using Tenchi characters , and as the case goes for the one you'll see, other characters from other movies. Back to SOL Mike's face is pale and the bots mouths hang open. Crow: H-h-h-h-how can such a thing exist? Tom: Yeah! Such a evil thing would cause an imbalance in the universe! Back to Castle F Pearl: Are you kidding? It's the internet! To it, it's just another day of dishing up filth! Anyway, your fic for today is a little crossover called: Tenchi Muyo! Versus Men in Black. Enjoy! Back to SOL. Lights and sirens are blearing. Mike: Oh, oh! Fan Fic Crossover sign!!!" Mike and bots run in different directions. DOOR SEQUENCE 6....5....4....3....2....1... Tenchi Muyo! Versus Men in Black By William Benjamin Grilliette [Crow: Hey, give me something heavy to throw...the writer is up there!] (evilpii@juno.com) All material of or relating to *Tenchi Muyo!* are copyrighted by Pioneer LD and AIC. All material of or relating to *Men in Black* are copyrighted by Marvel/Malibu Comics and Columbia/Tristar Pictures. All material of or relating to "Evil Pii" or "Nerti" are copyrighted to William Benjamin Grilliette. The plot line and events contained within this fan fiction are copyrighted to William Benjamin Grilliette. [Tom: Oh, is the great William Benjamin Grilliette going to grace us with his fic?] ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Act 1 Scene 1 {All sound is dulled.} [Crow: As dull as this fan fic.] {White screen. A black object in the shape of an eye moves from the top of the screen. [All: Resident EVIL!] Zoom out to see that the white shape is that of Kain's mask in a case.} [Tom: Or....not.] [Crow: Rats.] {Flashback to TMIL. In subspace Tenchi flies in and swipes at Kain with the Tenchiken opening a large gash over his right eye.} Kain: {Writhing in pain.} WWWAAAHHHAAAHHH!!! {End flashback.} {Brown screen. [Crow: Yep, this fic looks like crap already!] A black line moves in from the left. Zoom out to see that it is a bug's head severed from its body in a case.} {Flash-forward to MIB. J stands next to the bug.} J: {Daring the bug.} Better ease out my face before somethin' bad happen to ya. {A weapon is heard charging.} J: {Sarcastically.} Too late. {The bug's thorax expands and explodes.} [Mike: Raid in action, ladies and gentelmen.] {End flash-forward.} {Gray screen. A red-covered black spark appears at the left of the screen. [Crow: Did the fic start on fire?] [Tom: Don't think so...Mike, did you get holy water and toss it on the fic?] [Mike: No, and I'm sorry that I didn't] Zoom out to see Kagato's energy sword laying in a case.} {Flashback to TM!TV #23. See Kagato standing with his sword drawn facing Yosho.} Kagato: {In rage, marks appear on his face.} HHHAAAHHH!!! {Swipes at Yosho releasing a burst of energy.} Yosho: {Thrown backward into a wall.} ARGH! {End flashback.} {Red screen. A red spark of light shoots from lower right corner to upper left corner. Zoom out to see a drop of blood covered with seemingly red electricity in a petri dish.} {Flashback to TM!TV #23. Ryoko flies at Kagato. Kagato fires blasts of Dark Jurai Energy at Ryoko. One hits Ryoko in the left side of her abdomen.} Ryoko: {In extreme pain.} AAAHHH!!! {Falls to the ground.} {End flashback.} {All four items are sitting on a black table. A blonde woman walks to this macabre scene. Her face is shaded as to not reveal her identity. [Crow: Oh, oh! Do I smell a writer-made character cross-over?] [Mike: Hush! Do you want to bring it on?!] [Crow: Sorry.] Flash, she uses four syringes to take a sample from all four: from the mask purple, from the head oozy light brown, from the sword black, from the blood obviously red. Flash, another table holds up a petri dish. Flash, she squirts all four into the dish. From her pocket she pulls another syringe and adds this to the mixture. She pulls out a laser scalpel and fires upon the mixture. The mess turns green and begins to bubble and twitch. It crystalizes and generates a shield about itself.} [Mike: ...and Pop Rocks were born!] Woman: {Pleased.} Excellent. {Screen fades to black.} End Scene 1 Scene 2 {In her lab Washu is on her flying seat at a console typing.} Washu: {Stops typing and wipes her forehead.} Whew! I've finished the event calculations from Kain's death. Luckily, nothing around here will be seriously effected. [Crow: (as Washu) Except that impotent American president, Clintion.] {Looks to a screen image of Tenchi's room where he lays in bed with Sasami and Ayeka at his side.} They're certainly glad he lives. {Ryoko walks into the view.} Washu: {Entertained.} This should be fun to watch. {Alarms and lights become active.} [Mike: (Gets up) What the? We have movie sign!!!] [Tom: Mike! MIKE!] [Mike: What?] [Tom: It's the fic.] [Mike: Oh. (Sits back down)] Washu: {Turns to discern the meaning.} That wasn't there a moment ago. An Arquillian cruiser? What're they doing this far from home? [Crow: Starbuck's coffee, what else?] {Ayeka and Ryoko barge in arguing.} [Mike: No matter how badly a fic is written, Ayeka and Ryoko never change.] [Crow: Yeah, you're right Mike. Maybe this fic won't be so bad.] [All: (Think for a second) Naaaahhh!] Ayeka: I intend to marry him, therefore it is my duty to aid with Tenchi's bath! Ryoko: You couldn't hold your own against Kain! At least I could stand it! Ayeka: HOW DARE YOU!! Bringing up a fact such as THAT! Ryoko: Well, if you couldn't handle him, why should you handle the son of the victor? Ayeka: {Grabbing Ryoko.} OOOOHHHH!!!! Ryoko: {Energy bolts in her hands.} COME ON! I'M READY! [Crow: Oh boy! Lesbian action!] [Mike: Watch it.] [Crow: What?] [Tom: This is a crossover, not a lemon, Crow.] [Crow: Oh yeah. Rats.] Washu: HEY! CUT IT OUT!! {Ayeka and Ryoko scowl at Washu.} Washu: Ayeka, don't you know the Arquillian royalty? Ayeka: {Looking at the display panel.} Yes, what is a cruiser doing in orbit of Earth? Ryoko: Sounds like someone's on the Arquillians' bad side, Princess. Ayeka: {Glaring at Ryoko.} WHAT WAS THAT?! Washu: HEY! Now, Ayeka, do you think Kiyone and Mihoshi need to know about this? [Crow: What, and ruin the fun of seing Ayeka and Ryoko in a small ship together?] Ayeka: No, they have not attacked. It isn't a police matter. However, it would be best for someone to see why they are here. Washu: Well, we could go in Ryo-Ohki, if you will allow us, Ryoko. Meanwhile, Sasami and Nobuyuki could take care of Tenchi. Ryoko: Okay, but I'll be careful around that cruiser. I've been involved with those damn little mech-riding bastards before. They'll be your best friends until you cross them. Ayeka: {Snidely.} Only a pirate would be foolish enough to cross the noble Arquillian people. Ryoko: {Scowling at Ayeka.} DO YOU WANT A FIGHT? Washu: THERE IS NO TIME TO WASTE! Ryoko: {Turning from Ayeka.} Okay. Ayeka: {Turning from Ryoko.} Yes. Washu: I will contact Kiyone and Mihoshi, just in case. Ryoko, you go get Ryo-Ohki. Ayeka, you review your knowledge of the Arquillians. {Ryoko and Ayeka storm out with sparks flying in their gaze. [Mike: Eye protection SHOULD be worn in this area.] [Tom: Mike, the only way to stay protected in Washu's Lab is to stay out.] [Mike: Oh yeah, you got a point.] Washu returns to her computer and begins typing. She stops typing, and an image of Kiyone at home appears before Washu.} Washu: Kiyone. Kiyone: {Startled.} Washu, what do you want? Washu: Ryoko, Ayeka, and I are heading for an Arquillian ship in orbit. If we don't return tomorrow, will you come to help us? Kiyone: Certainly. But, why shouldn't I go and do this? Washu: Ayeka has more diplomatic pull, and Ryoko can get us through a quick fight. Kiyone: I see. You do have some theories regarding their appearance here? [Crow: Let's see? She's asking WASHU if she has theories regarding their appearance...] [Tom: Well, maybe she won't. Wait a minute, are we talking about THE Washu?] [Crow: Yep.] [Tom: Oh, never mind.] Washu: {Seriously.} Yes, but you don't want to hear them. {Fade out.} End Scene 2 Scene 3 [Crow: Yep, ya know when you're in the long haul when the fic is divided into Acts AND scenes!] [Mike: Well said.] {Outside the Masaki home, mid-afternoon, [Mike: Things were blowing up.] Ayeka and Ryoko with Ryo-Ohki walk out with Washu between. Tenchi on crutches with Sasami and Nobuyuki on each side walks onto the porch. From the shrine Yosho comes to see what's happening.} Ryoko: Well, we're off to another adventure. Washu: Actually, an investigative mission. [Crow: What's the difference?] [Mike: Washu is using the technical term, just to make everyone feel dumb again.] Ayeka: Sasami, take good care of Tenchi for me. Ryoko: {Startled at those words.} For you!? What do you think you're saying? Sasami: {Pleading.} Please don't fight. [Tom: Oh, like they'll all of the sudden listen to someone.] Tenchi: You three be careful. I wish I could help. Ayeka: Thank you, Lord Tenchi, but you need to heal those wounds. Even with Ryu-Oh's sap, it will take time for you to feel better. Ryoko: {Turning from Ayeka.} HUMPF! If Tenchi could come, we wouldn't need you, Princess. Ayeka: {Turning to Ryoko.} RYOKO! Washu: I don't like REPEATING MYSELF! WE HAVE NO TIME!! Now, Ryoko. Ryoko: {Snapping her fingers.} Ryo-Ohki! {Ryo-Ohki transforms into the crystalline ship Ryo-Ohki.} Washu: {Holding fish-shaped devices.} Since we and the Arquillians speak such different languages, I created these little devices based on the Babel Fish to ease communication. A great invention if I do say so myself. [Tom: And she will.] {Silence for about a minute.} Ryoko: Anyway, can we go now. Ayeka: Yes, let's be off. {The three transport onto Ryo-Ohki while the others wave goodbye. Ryo-Ohki pulls away from Earth and moves toward the cruiser.} [All: (They start humming the Empire theme from Star Wars)] Washu: {At her laptop.} Hmm. Ryoko, Ayeka, look at this. I've been monitoring the transmissions of the Arquillian vessel. It's been sending messages to the US island of Manhattan! Ayeka: The United States? Why would the Arquillians be speaking to the Americans? Ryoko: Maybe they're ordering a pizza. [Crow: HEY! I WAS GOING TO SAY THAT! HOW DARE THE WRITER TAKE THAT JOKE FROM ME!] [Mike: Let it go, Crow.] [Crow: No way! I won't go on about it right now, but William Benjamin Grilliette better watch out!] [Tom: Oh, what are you going to do? Use that Rodger Whitiker head we got from Puma Man and have him kill the writer?] [Mike: Don't give him ideas, Tom.] Washu: Well, can you alter our course to bring us near there for me to better monitor those transmissions? Ryoko: I suppose. {Ryo-Ohki comes into a line between the Arquillian ship and the North Pole above Manhattan.} Ayeka: This is strange. They have not tried to identify us yet. {Ryo-Ohki meows with importance. A brightly lit screen pops up displaying the weapon status of the other ship.} Ryoko: They're powering weapons! Ryo-Ohki, course 1.57 starboard! {The Arquillian ship fires, grazes Ryo-Ohki, and impacts the North Pole. Ryo-Ohki falls towards earth. Inside, Ryo-Ohki screams in pain. The others yell in fear.} Ryoko: DAMMIT! Where's the nearest city? Washu: Manhattan. [Tom: Well, duh! You were hovering right over it!] Ayeka: Is that not where those transmissions were going? Washu: Yes, but we can't make it to Japan in this shape. Ryoko: {Grabbing Ryo-Ohki's controls.} I'll try to make us hit the ocean. Brace yourselves! {Ryo-Ohki falls down through the atmosphere splashing off the Manhattan coastline.} End Scene 3 End Act 1 Act 2 Scene 1 {Black screen.} [Mike: Oh, it's over! We can leave!] [Bots: Yeaaahh!] [Everyone gets up] Tenchi: Ayeka... [All: D'oh! (All sit back down)] Ayeka: Yes, Lord Tenchi? Tenchi: AYEKA... Ayeka: Yes? Washu: AYEKA!!! {Ayeka's eyes pop open to reveal Washu standing over her on a Manhattan beach morning.} Ayeka: {Sitting up quickly and knocking Washu over onto a Japanese door laying beside her.} Where are we??? Where is Tenchi??? Washu: {Rubbing her rump from the fall.} We're on Manhattan Island in the US. Tenchi's home with his injuries. Ya remember now? Ayeka: {After a short time thinking.} Yes... [Mike: (As Ayeka) I had a dream...and you were in it, and you, and Ryoko was in it for a minute, but then she was arressted... what a good dream!] Where are Ryoko and Ryo-Ohki? Washu: {Pointing to the sea.} Right there. {Ayeka looks to the sea. The ship Ryo-Ohki floats in the sea not moving.} Ayeka: {Standing.} How did we get out? [Crow: You don't wanna know.] Washu: {Also standing.} I believe Ryo-Ohki began to transport us out after the crash. Ryoko may not be out because Ryo-Ohki needs to recharge, or Ryoko is badly injured and cannot be moved. Ayeka: What can we do now? Washu: Well... {A solid black car and a large black van drive up roughly fifty meters from Ayeka and Washu.} Ayeka: Who are they?! Washu: I doubt the local police. {Picks up the dimensional door.} I was prepared for this. (Opens the door.} {Ayeka and Washu run into the door. Scene changes to a ratty old motel room where the door appears and opens. Ayeka and Washu run into the room.} Washu: {Slamming the dimensional door.} I think we're safe. {Opens a portal to her lab storage and puts away the door.} Ayeka: {Looking about the room.} Washu, why did you choose this HORRID little HOLE? Washu: Because those men hopefully wouldn't look for two fugitives with "unusual" hairstyles in a run-down motel. We can't all live like princesses! Ayeka: But, who were those men? Washu: {Sitting into a rotten chair.} Well, if you believe the legends, they were the "Men in Black". They're a secretive US government agency. [Tom: If Washu is the greatest scientific mind in the universe, wouldn't Washu know that they aren't legends?] [Mike: Don't nitpick, Tom.] Ayeka: {Sitting on a dust-covered bed.} What is their purpose? Washu: They proclaim to oversee all alien dealings on Earth. However, they seem to leave other countries alone. Ayeka: So, that would explain their arrival at Ryo-Ohki's crash site. What will they do with someone they have captured? Washu: If Ryoko is still alive, they will imprison her and Ryo-Ohki in their headquarters for delivery to the Galaxy Police. As much as you would want that, we need BOTH Ryoko and Ryo-Ohki to get home, unless you want to wait on Mihoshi and Kiyone to save us. Ayeka: Can you find their headquarters? Washu: Not directly, since its probably hidden and shielded. [Tom: That would stop Washu?] [Mike: What did I tell you about nitpicking?] [Crow: Not much without her big, impressive lab, now is she?] I scanned a moment ago and found nothing about those signals from earlier. I'll begin another search for any other aliens in the area. In the meantime, we need to do something about our appearance. Our hair color will be a problem. Ayeka: {Caressing her long tendrils of purple hair.} WHAT?! You suggest that I should DYE my HAIR!? A GREAT symbol of my LINEAGE!? Washu: Would you rather be captured and placed in a MIB cell like Ryoko? Ayeka: {Dropping her hair.} Alright, alright. Will it wear off? Washu: Of course. [Crow: Of course, coming from Washu, it'll probably take a few hundred years.] Ayeka: And language? You covered that with the mecha-babel fish correct? Washu: {Full of herself.} Yes. I copied the mechanism that allows the fish to translate language and improved it to modulate the user's voice to the other person's language! And the simplicity is that you just stick it in your ear. Mihoshi couldn't mess this one up! Ayeka: I would not be so sure. [All: Amen!] {Standing.} Let's get the hair dying over with. {Washu stands and leads the way to the bathroom. Along the way, she laughs to herself.} End Scene 1 Scene 2 {Ryoko lays unconscious on a medical bed in an otherwise empty room.} Ryoko: {Opens her eyes and sits up with some pain in the left side of her abdomen.} Oh...Where am I? {Looks around the room.} Oh damn. I've been captured. [Tom: ...And put in a Hotel 6!] No problem. {Stands and walks to the opposite wall. Confidently faces the palm of her hand toward a wall.} {The typical red glow appears in her palm. A small energy bolt flies from her hand to the wall. On impact it is absorbed into the wall.} Ryoko: {Surprised.} What?! {Forms her energy sword and swipes at the wall. No effect. Flies around the room strikes at all six facets of the room. No effect. Stops and floats in the center of the room.} What's the deal? Voice: {To Ryoko, in Japanese.} Well, I could tell you that the walls are energy-absorbing. Ryoko: Who the heck are you? [Mike: "Like the dialogue says, I'm Voice!"] Voice: Call me Zed. You're powerful Ryoko, but we've studied the Galaxy Police records on your life and planned accordingly. Though you aided in the Jurai incident and the destruction of Kain, the warrants for your crimes haven't been canceled. {Ryoko clasps her hands, kneels, and tries to contact Ryo-Ohki telepathically.} Zed: Praying won't help. You'll be turned over to the Galaxy Police when they arrive. [Tom: You would think that the head of MiB would know what she was doing.] [Mike: Nitpicking...] [Tom: Yeah, yeah.] {Ryoko makes a connection to Ryo-Ohki in the next room. Scene changes to a store room next- door where the ship Ryo-Ohki is held up with braces. Ryo-Ohki transforms into her cabbit form and sits attentively. Back to Ryoko.} [Tom: (Going catatonic) But, I thought....that...he....room....Ryoko-proof....] [Mike: Tom, settle down! You haven't blown your head for a long time, don't do it now!] Ryoko: {In her mind.} Minor injuries. You'll fly soon enough. {Stands to challenge Zed's voice.} I don't think so. Zed: We have your Ryo-Ohki, and we're looking for your allies we saw at the crash site. You all were going toward the Arquillian vessel. Were you in cahoots with the bug? Ryoko: Why would I do business with a bug?! Zed: Why else would you fly your ship towards an Arquillian battle cruiser? [Crow: To get to the other side?] Ryoko: To find out why they came to Earth, especially since they fired on this planet! Zed: Regardless, we will give you to the Galaxy Police as soon as they arrive. A liaison officer will arrive tomorrow. I'll see you then. Ryoko: {To herself.} I doubt that. End Scene 2 Scene 3 {Zed's office. Agent J and his new partner L sit opposite Zed, who is at his desk.} [Crow: Hey, who's L?] [Mike: Remember at the end of MiB, K "retired", and that one woman became an agent?"] [Crow: You mean...this fic actually has... continuity?] [Tom: (Stops going catatonic) Whew! Maybe this fic might be all right after all!] Zed: J, there's been a change in the Rosenburg case. We've recovered an Ohki class organic ship from the bay. It flew a little too close to the Arquillian ship. Within we found the space pirate Ryoko. J: Ryoko...bad-ass huh? Trying to take that big cruiser alone. Zed: No. She had two accomplices. Since this is related to the bug case, I've chosen you two to find these two fugitives. L: Do you have any description of the two? Zed: Not a specific one. One is the same race as Ryoko, the other Juraian. If they stay in one place too long, you can find them. L, this will be your first real case. Do as J tells you. L: Yes, sir. Zed: Good hunting, tigers. {J and L walk out of MIB HQ toward their car.} J: Zed...He don't get out much. L: Well, how can he? J: Yeah...What do ya make of this "Ryoko"? L: She has either courage or stupidity. Best check the hot sheets and find her friends. J: Yeah. {Together they drive to a nearby new-stand. J gets out, picks out a selection of magazines, and moves to a hotdog stand. He picks up two hotdogs. One mag with his old partner K on the cover peaks his interest. He puts on his custom sunglasses.} L: {Leaning against the car.} Hey, J. {J turns to her.} L: Zed called. The High Consulate of Salaxium 9 wants floor seats for the Nicks/Bulls game. J: {Walks to the car.} Alright. Let's put in a call to Dennis Rodman. He's from that planet. {Hands L a hotdog.} L: {Amazed.} Rodman? You're kidding? J: Nope. L: {Sarcastically.} Not much of a disguise. [Tom: Oh my God! He even found a way to tie it in with the movie!] [Mike: Could it be possible?] [Crow: A GOOD crossover?] {They get in the car and drive away. Within the car.} L: {Reading the magazines.} There's some information about the crash but nothing about the two refugees. J: {Disappointed.} I guess we have to do it the old fashioned way. [Crow: By asking civilians, and then frying their memories! Good ol' fun!] End Scene 3 End Act 2 Act 3 Scene 1 {A Manhattan street full of people. Ayeka and Washu walk down the street side by side. Ayeka has her hair black in a beehive, Washu's brown in a sharp, angular ponytail.} Ayeka: {Whining.} Why must I wear my hair such?! Washu: {Smirking.} 'Cause most American women wear their hair like that. [Crow: Washu has been watching to many Simpsons episodes] Ayeka: And yours? Washu: Younger girls don't have to. I found another alien presence near here. {Creates her laptop.} Let's see...{Looks around}...right about... {Points to a locksmith booth.} ...there. [Tom: Oh, and apparently young female Americans can make computers materialize out of nowhere.] {In the locksmith booth a tall, lanky, "zombie" man leans over the counter, and a small dog sits watching the two characters.} Ayeka: Which one? Washu: {Looks at computer. Surprised.} The dog?! Dog: {Startled.} What the hell?! {The dog tries to run, but Washu pulls out and throws a boomerang. The rang catches up with the dog, encases it in an energy shield and returns to Washu.} [Tom: ... and they all have boomerangs that encases it's target in a energy shield, too.] Dog: Okay, wha do ya want? Washu: Where are the Men In Black? Dog: I don't know. Ayeka: We need to get our friends back so we can return home. Dog: So what? [Crow: Just shake the hell out of 'em like in the MiB movie!] [Mike: That would be too easy.] Ayeka: {Demanding.} As the crown princess of Jurai royal family, I order you to take us to the MIB! Dog: JURAI ROYAL FAMILY! OKAY, OKAY! I'll take you! Just don't hurt me! My name is Frank. Follow me. Ayeka: Thank you. {They release Frank. He trots along in front of Ayeka and Washu. Frank suddenly ducks into an alley. Ayeka and Washu run after him. In the alley they see Frank in a large MechaPug staring at them.} Washu: WHOA! Frank: Imagine the political leverage if I bagged a Juraian princess! Ayeka: {Angered by Frank.} I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!!! {Ayeka's hair lifts up as if a wind blows from below. The hair dye is burned away from her hair, and the hair returns to its usual style. Ayeka's trademark cylinders [Mike: Patent pending...] appear and surround the MechaPug.} Washu: Oh no. Frank: Even a royal Juraian cannot defeat this. [Crow: Delusional, ain't he?] [Tom: Yep! Poor bastard's death cries will be muffled by a throat full of his own blood!] {Washu runs out of the alley. From this vantage point a bright light appears followed by an explosion. Washu looks around the corner. She sees Ayeka walking to her. The MechaPug is in ruins behind her.} Ayeka: The headquarters is under the Triborough Bridge and Tunnel Authority building. Washu: Now that we know, let's go back to the hotel and fix your hair. Ayeka: {Scowling at Washu.} No. Washu: Oh well...{Creates the laptop and changes her hair back too.} [Mike: Yeah, I forgot. This is NEW YORK!] Let's go. {Ayeka and Washu walk away stared at by everyone. Moments later J and L's car pulls up to the photo booth. They get out and look for Frank.} J: Where is the little punk? I know he came back after the bug's death. {In the background a whimper can be heard.} L: What's that? {They walk to the alley and find Frank on the ground surrounded by debris.} J: Frank. Tryin' to be tough, huh? Who did this anyway? Frank: A Juraian princess and a spiked hair midget. L: The renegades... [Crow: Washu and Ayeka...ARE...the RENEGADES!] J: Frank, 'member this next time ya try somethin' stupid. Frank: Eh...shove it up your ass! L: Where are they going? Frank: Men In Black Headquarters. J: Great. They'll be captured with Ryoko. L: I'll call a containment crew to clean this up. {J and L get in the car and head for MIB HQ.} End Scene 1 Scene 2 {In Ryoko's cell she lays asleep on the bed. Telepathically, Ryo-Ohki awakes Ryoko.} Ryoko: Ah...Time to go! {Gets up, goes to a corner, and creates a shield about herself.} Go Ryo-Ohki! {In the other cell Ryo-Ohki transforms, turns her guns towards the wall, and fires. Two parallel walls in Ryoko's cell have large holes blown in them. [Tom: But the walls are ENERGY ABSORBING!] [Mike: Maybe the shots are projectiles...] [Crow: Yeah, Ryo-Ohki is using big pieces of her...] [Mike: Crow...] [Crow: ...of her carrots! Geesshh!] Alarms sound. Ryo-Ohki transforms and runs to Ryoko. Ryoko lowers her shield and allows Ryo-Ohki to jump on her shoulder.} Ryoko: Very good. Now, let's leave. {Levitates off the ground and flies out the hole into a hallway.} {Within the hallway MIB agents run out in front and behind her armed with de-atomizers.} Ryoko: Humpf! {Blasts the floor below her and flies into the MIB motor-pool.} Alright. {Floats to a car, gets in, and turns the key.} {The MIB agents flood in through the doors leading from the main base.} Ryoko: {Rolls down the window, places her hand out the window, and faces her palm at them.} BACK OFF!!! {The MIB agents slowly move back into the corridors.} Agent: You can't get away, Ryoko! Give it up! Ryoko: What is it with cops? They always say that. {Faces her palm to the sliding door separating the motor-pool from the world and blasts it. It is night.} Ready? {Ryo-Ohki agrees. Ryoko speeds out the hole. Soon, she sees Ayeka and Washu on the sidewalk, stops, and opens the passenger-side door.} Ryoko: Need a lift? {Ayeka and Washu get in, and they drive off.} Ryoko: Had fun without me? {Washu hands a mecha-babel fish to Ryoko. Ryoko uses it.} [Tom: Why?! They all speak the same language!] [Mike: Enough nitpicking!] Ryoko: Well? Washu: We had some trouble at first, but we're fine. Ayeka: I'm ready to leave. Ryoko: Yeah, but we've gotta get away from these MIB agents first. {They race down the roads at a speed of 80 mph. They pass another MIB car with J and L inside.} J: {Hits the brakes.} Hey! That driver wasn't MIB! That's Ryoko! {Turns the car around, transforms it for subsonic travel, and pursues the first car.} {J's car easily catches Ryoko's car.} L: {Over the radio.} Ryoko, we are right on your tail. Pull over! Washu: {Takes the mic.} This is the genius, Washu. I doubt Ryoko'll stop anytime soon. L: Who's the other in your party? Washu: Princess Ayeka of the Planet Jurai. L: A princess...? Ayeka: What's that red button? Ryoko: I don't know. Press it. It can't hurt. [Mike: Shouldn't that be Washu's line?] [Tom: Now who's nitpicking?] {Ayeka presses the button. Ryoko's car is transmogrified.} Ryoko: Now we have some speed! {Ryoko's and J's cars now are going Mach .1. They dodge in and out of traffic. Soon, they are outside the city limits. From the sky above them, a blast of energy strikes just ahead of the cars creating a ten meter diameter hemispherical hole.} Ryoko: OH DAMN!!! {Turns the wheel hard and falls into the hole.} J: OH DAMN!!! {Turns the wheel hard and sideswipes Ryoko's car.} [Crow: I'll handle this one Tom. How can J sideswipe Ryoko's car if Ryoko's car IS IN A HOLE?!] [Tom: Thanks.] {The car doors open, and all the characters climb out of the hole and gather on the shoulder of the road.} L: What was that? Washu: A star-ship weapon. Ayeka: {Pointing to the sky.} Look! {Through the night sky a flying saucer appears and faces all of the characters.} J: A bug ship! Ryoko: {With energy bolts in her hands.} I can take it. Washu: Something isn't right. We have to leave now! Can y'all distract him? J & Ryoko: YEAH! {J pulls out a triple barreled weapon from the trunk of his car. Ryoko charges up. Washu begins to get her dimensional door. Ryoko and J flank the ship.} J: Ryoko, don't think I still won't take you down. Ryoko: I don't care. Let's take out the bug first. J: Yeah. {Ryoko and J blast the ship. It explodes and falls to the side. Ryoko and J then go toe to toe daring each other to make the first move.} Ayeka, Washu, & L: BEHIND YOU!!! {Ryoko and J turn around to see a giant bug, but not the feeble roach J and K defeated. This insect is a green praying mantis surrounded by an energy shield. Ryoko and J fire again. No effect.} J & Ryoko: Oh Damn. Washu: We're ready! {All the characters run through the door and appear in the ratty motel.} Ayeka: {Disappointedly surprised.} HERE?! AGAIN?! Washu: Look, this was short notice. Ryoko: What more can happen? Ayeka: Kiyone and Mihoshi will search for us tomorrow. [Mike: 'Nuff said.] L: The liaison officer from the GP will be here tomorrow. J: This gets better. Washu: Well, we all need sleep. I'm going to bed. Ayeka: I as well. L: Same here. J: {Uneasy.} I won't sleep with Ryoko around. Ryoko: Go ahead. I'm going to sleep. Ryo-Ohki? {Ryo-Ohki agrees.} J: Fine. {Iris out.} End Scene 2 End Act 3 [Mike: ughhhh! About time!] [All get up and exit theater] DOOR SEQUENCE 1....2....3....4....5....6.... Well fokes, that's it for now, but don't worry, the second part will be MSTed soon, as soon as I get all of these mad writers out of my house! Hey, don't burn that! That's my Tenchi poster! And quit poking my VCR with that pitchfork! Anyway, e-mail me at mirrorknight@collegeclub.net Oh, a little side note for the writer from Crow... [Crow: Remember, William Benjamin Grilliette, be on the lookout for... Rodger Whitiker! He he he...HA HA HA... HAHA HAHAHA HAHAH HA!]