*DISCLAIMER*
I don't own shit...would be a pretty inadequate disclaimer.  Therefore
I would like to point out that Duo is property of Sotsu Agency and 
Sunrise.  Also, it would be remiss not to mention that Toei Animation
and Saban own Ken and Wormon, and Kiyone is the bitch of Pioneer and
AIC.  Also, I suppose Zap Rowsdower is property of Tjardinus Greidanus,
or whatever the hell his name was.  I'll just say he's property of Ed
from the accounting department.  Great work, Ed!  This is another Gene 
Mesaki fic, but he mentions that it's a lemon in his disclaimer this 
time.  That doesn't mean I'm not going to mention it.  I'm not worried 
about young kids reading porn as much as I am them being scarred for 
life.  Therefore, I'm asking all of the younguns to stay away from this 
fic.
*DISCLAIMER*

The HMS Zap Rowsdower.  A former experimental Canadian spacecraft, 
stolen by an unwitting teenage tourist, Cyrus Marriner.  It is on 
this newly acquired spaceship that this young man dedicates himself 
to one sole purpose...to make the universe a better place.  To boldly 
seek out evil in all of its forms and destroy it with extreme 
prejudice.  Unfortunately, he really doesn't have the time to do
all of that, and the ship is really complicated, so he just decides 
to make fun of really bad Tenchi Muyo fan fiction.

Using advanced Canadian technology, Cyrus Marriner reaches into
the fabric of time and space and pulls together a crew of individuals 
who can handle the severe mental strain of reading bad fan fiction.  
Unless they can't.

And now, our group of talented MSTers:

Kiyone "I am not a lesbian!" Makibi
Duo "She's throwing herself at the moron!" Maxwell
Ken "Aren't I too young to read these fics?" Ichijouji

and the pilot:

Wor-"I think the green button is go."-mon

_______________________________________________________________________

(Cyrus and Duo are sitting in the comm. room, a large room with
lots of flashing lights and monitors)

<Cyrus>: Hello, and welcome to a new opening for our MST.  We're going
to read fan mail people have sent us!
<Duo>: Why am I here again?
<Cyrus>: Because you're visible.  People need to see you.  You have to
be out there, like that gay guy on Will and Grace.
<Duo>: I think all the people are gay on Will and Grace.
<Cyrus>: Whatever.  Anyway, let's look at the first letter (turns to
a nearby console and hits a few buttons):

    Blah blah blah, it's odd that the Quebecois would name their 
    spaceship after a hero from Alberta, blah blah blah blah.

    -Smolken

<Cyrus>: Well, Smolken, to answer your question we did a little
research, and we found out why it's named after an Albertan.  Now,
for your listening pleasure, we would like to present "The Ballad of
Zap Rowsdower".

THE BALLAD OF ZAP ROWSDOWER
by Hank Williams Jr. (But pronounce it all Frenchy, for legal reasons)

Now listen up, listen to my story
Of a man named Zap Rowsdower,
He lived in a truck, he had bad luck,
Often was his visage sour.

He was found by and evil cult one day
And branded with an hourglass,
Then he shot a guy, and after he died,
Zap was kicked out on his ass.

Then he ran across a kid who was
The son of the guy he'd shot,
The kid's name was Troy, he was a running boy,
>From the cult whose map he'd got.

Then the two of them ran across Alberta
In Canada way up North,
And the cult did find 'em and with rope did bind 'em
To call their city forth.

But Rowsdower cast off his bonds
And fought some evil guy,
It was one-on-one, then Troy found a gun,
And then the villain died.

Then Zap and Troy went off together,
And their friendship found much growth,
But in Ottowa, someone knew what they saw,
And tried to catch them both.

The government attacked them both
To protect the evil cult,
There was a gunfight, Troy died that night,
And Zap began to sulk.

He went to a bar in French Quebec
To drown his troubling haunts,
Then a man found him, said, "Bonjour my friend,
I am with La Resistance."

So Zap joined up to fight the regime
That killed his bestest friend,
He set up a vote, so Quebec could dote
On if its statehood should end.

Then the parliament, with it's evil spies,
Found the resistance's scheme,
There assassins killed all for the bill
With a high-tech laser beam.

But all wasn't lost 'cause Zap had found
A genius scientist,
He was a smart guy, he made a ship to fly
Away from the Canuck Fascists.

Then a spy tried to reveal the plan
To the evil government,
Zap made a sacrifice to put the guy on ice
Before the message could be sent.

His sacrifice was hailed by all,
And when they built the ship,
It was named Rowsdower, and it had enough power
For an interstellar trip.

And thus ends the story of the great Rowsdower,
A man who would often drink,
His tale is done, he saved everyone,
But his underwear was pink.

<Cyrus>: (wipes a tear from his eye) That truly was a great man.
<Duo>: What was with the pink underwear thing?
<Cyrus>: Shut up. (MST sign goes off) Woah, we'd better get to the
theater!

_______________________________________________________________________

I don't own shit except Gene. And this is a lemon.

<Cyrus>: Wow, at this rate he'll have an adequate disclaimer by
part 13!
<Kiyone>: I really pray it doesn't come to that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                   Gene Mesaki II
                                 " A secret crush"

<Duo>: Maybe they're talking about the secret of why his nuts are
crushed and he giggles like a little girl!

After last night with Kyone Gene was out, he had little energy left.
He slept all the way through  to lunch time, it was around 12 P.M..

<Ken, as Gene>: I had no idea that Kiyone was that good at dodgeball!

Sesami finished cooking lunch so first she went to the living
room and told Aeka, Ryoko, Mihoshi and Kyone that it is
lunch time. 

<Cyrus>: Alright, Mr. Sinister.  Let's pick a tense and stick with it,
okay?

Then she told Ryo-ohki  to run over to Tenchi to bring him back for 
lunch. Then she went into Washus lab and told the scientist that it 
was lunch time.

<Ken>: I've really missed the famous "list" writing style that Mr.
Sinister employs.  It cuts through all of the detail and goes right
to the action!

"Ohh wait a second I nearly forgot about Gene" Sesami said
quietly to herself. 

<Kiyone>: Why would she whisper to herself?  I mean, it's not
like she's talking about some giant sin that she needs to keep
quiet.  I mean, really.

She ran up the stairs, and at Genes door she slowed down. She 
slowly opened the door and saw Gene sleeping in his boxers. She 
tip-toed over to his bed and she whispered "Ehh Gene, wake up 
Gene" she said gently into his ear.

<Duo>: Does anyone want to take a guess why she tip-toes over to
Gene and whispers into his ear instead of just yelling at him?
<Cyrus>: So there can be an awkward quasi-sexual encounter?
<Duo>: Bingo!

Gene was asleep but as soon as he heard Sesamis voice he smiled.
Then he said "Hmmmm". 

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Heh heh heh.  I like little girls.

He was asleep but he grabbed her and laid her down on his right 
side. He tightly hugger her. "Isn't this much nicer, don't ever 
leave"

<Ken>: Yeah, he was "asleep."  I bet he does his exercise in his
sleep, too.

Sesami didn't know what to do, but she kind of liked it. 

<Kiyone>: Enter the lemon logic!

But she knew it wasn't right. 

<Ken>: Well, that's more than she usually knows.

Then Gene wrapped his legs around her and then she felt something 
press against her leg. Gene lips where inches from her lips. "Ehh 
Gene please wake up"  She said a last time.

<Duo, as Sasami>: I need to get your dick off of my leg before
Ryo-Ohki thinks I'm hiding a carrot and bites it off!
<Kiyone>: Dammit, don't give the authors ideas.
<Duo>: Please, who would do something like that?
<Cyrus>: Nobody.
<Duo>: See?
<Cyrus>: Because it's already been done.
<Duo>: That is sick.

"Ehh wha...." Gene slowly opened his right eye then his left.
He saw Sesami right next to him, and he felt as he had tightly
hugger her. 

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Thank you for waking me up, Sasami.  I was
asleep then.  I was not awake and about to make love to you.
I was asleep.  Really.  I really was asleep.

"Ohh how long have you been here" Gene said in a warm and teasing 
voice. But he was just kidding around.

<Ken>: He didn't care how long she had been there.

"Morning sleepy!" Sesami said with that amazingly cute smile
of hers. "I came to wake you up but then you grabbed me"

<Duo, as Sasami>: And started to rape me.  Fortunately, I
always carry some anti-lemon spray with me.

"Hehehe woops sorry there. Hey I could get used to waking
up to a pretty girl like you" he said as he let go of her. 

<Kiyone>: The sad thing is, that isn't just flattery he's giving
to the kid.  He really wants to sleep with her.

Then felt that his dick was firmly pressed against her leg. He 
looked down and jumped out of the bed. "I'll be down later" He 
said as he dashed into the washroom to clean up.

<Duo, laughing>: Hahahahahahaha!
<Cyrus>: What?  What's so funny?
<Duo>: "I'll be down later?"  Get it?  I'm pretty sure it wasn't
an intentional pun either.
<Cyrus>: Oh, I get it, too!  And he goes into the bathroom 
immediately afterwards?
<Duo>: That was one unintentionally funny scene.

Sesami got up and then she though * I could get used to waking
up next to you? Hmm how cute* 

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: In a sort of statutory rape kind of way.

Then she went downstairs and she walked by Kyone. " I just woke up 
Gene, hes in the just getting ready."

<Ken>: You know, applying the thick layer of slime that always seems
to coat him, that sort of stuff.

"Ok thank you Sesami" Kyone said. She walked upstair into
Genes room. She sat on his bed and decided to wait for him.

Gene cleaned up. While he was brushing his teeth he thought.
*Hey where was Kyone? How am I supposed to tell her
that I'm not interested in her?* 

<Kiyone, yelling>: YOU COULD HAVE STARTED BY NOT SLEEPING WITH
ME!

Gene walked into his room and saw Kyone sitting on his bed. "That 
thing last nigh......" He said while he was cut off.

<Kiyone>: Hopefully by me shooting him in the head.

"That was a one night thing" Kyone said.

<Duo>: Sorry, you cut it off by admitting you're a slut.  You 
were close, though.

"Yeah thats it, I'm soo happy that you thought the same thing..
Let's never speak about it again. O.K??" He said hoping she
would agree.

<Kiyone>: Oh, definitely.

She got up. Then she walked towards. He hugged her and then
she stood on her toes and gave Gene a kiss on his cheek.
"Ok I'll see you around." She walked out the door and down
the stairs to the table where the food had been set up.

<Cyrus>: Oh my god!  Get out of there food!  IT'S A SET-UP!

"Hey I should have brought some clothes, Hehe stupid me"
Gene said to himself. 

<Duo, as Gene>: Looks like I'll just have to walk around naked!  
The last time I did that everyone seemed to get a kick out of
it!  They couldn't look at me without laughing!

He put on a pair of black shorts that were down under his knees. 

<Ken>: "Under his knees?"  Do they require some sort of surgery
to put on?

Then he put on a white under shirt. "Hmm I wonder if there is a 
mall around here somewhere"

<Kiyone>: Of course there is!  Why WOULDN'T there be a mall
near a small Shinto shrine in rural Japan?

He walked downstairs, and at the same time Tenchi just got
home from the carrot patch. Gene greeted everyone and sat
down on his new spot next to Sesami.

<Duo>: At least his new spot isn't inside Sasami--(hears click
of a GP-issue blaster)--'s kitchen!

Everyone digged into their food. The food was great, it was
like a Juraian version of Mongolian beef. 

<Ken>: Instead of being called Mongolian beef, it was called 
Juraian beef.

Then there was a wide choice of different kind of foods. Gene 
looked at the food and he put on a confused look.

<Cyrus, as Gene>: What is this "food" of which you speak?

Sesami noticed it. She frowned and said "You don't like my
cooking do you" then she looked down.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Even though I receive compliments every
day, and even won a cooking contest, your confused look causes
me distress.  I believe I'll commit hara-kiri now.

"No no no, I love it, its all so amazing. But I don't know
which one to eat first" Gene said. "You are the best and cutest
cook I have ever met or seen in my life"

<Duo>: Perhaps you could be more overt in your flirting.  Like
Ryoko.

"Thank you!" Sesami said in relief, she looked up at him as he
digged into the beef.

<Ken>: Alright.  The past tense of dig is dug.  Not digged.
<Cyrus>: Dig-Dug.  Now that was a great game.

"Geez enough with the cute stuff" Ryoko quietly said, thinking
that no one will hear it.

<Cyrus>: When flirting gets on Ryoko's nerves, it's gotten
pretty heavy.

"Hmmm..." Gene stopped, then he stared at Ryoko "Hahahaha
well Tenchi has a weak spot for cute talk. He loves it when
girls call him cute" he said it with a funny grin on his face.

<Kiyone>: About the only funny thing in this entire series.
<Duo>: Except for that scene where he says, "I'll be down
in a minute!"  That's great stuff!

Ryoko looked straight at Tenchi, she hugged him and started
to say all these cute things. Funny enough Aeka didn't get jelous
because she knew Genes trick.

<Cyrus>: They certainly are wily.  Or stupid.

"Ahhh, now why would you say that Gene. Look Ryoko hes just
joking around. Look at him hes laughing at you" Tenchi said,
desperately trying to free himself.

"Grrrr, no one messes with me" Ryoko angrily said. She let go of
Tenchi. Then she lifted her right arm, and made a ball of energy.

Then she trew the ball of energy straight at him. Then out of no
where Gene picked up a big peace of meat with his chop sticks,
he held up the meat right in front of the ball coming straight at him.

<Duo>: Then, the author used the word "then" for the millionth
fucking time.

The ball hit the meat and weirdly enough it cooked the meat even
more. "Hey Sesami I like my meat well done but this is a joke"
Gene said.

<Cyrus>: Acutally, it's not a joke.  It's the opposite of a
joke.  I would go so far as to call it anti-humor.

Everyone started to laugh and Ryoko got madder and madder.

<Ken>: Wow.  With that one sentence, he managed to make everyone
except Ayeka and Ryoko act out of character.
<Kiyone>: Yeah.  I don't think any of us except Ayeka would
find such a cruel mocking of Ryoko funny.  We would probably
be more concerned she was going to blow away the house.

She was going to make another ball but the Tenchi said "STOP
THAT RYOKO". She instantly stopped then she started to eat
again. She mumbled a few words to her self but no one cared.

<Duo>: That was cold.

"Hey Tenchi I was wondering is there a shopping mall around
here somewhere in this town." Gene said

<Cyrus>: You mean the town that consists of the Shrine and Tenchi's
house?  Yeah, there's a shopping mall.  You just head over that
mountain and GO BACK TO GODDAMN TOKYO WHERE YOU BELONG.
<Kiyone>: Wow, that was kind of bitter.
<Cyrus>: Sorry.  I let my emotions get the best of me.

"Yeah there is. Hmm I have to go to see Dad later at work
because I have some project that he could help me on. 

<Ken, as Tenchi>: I'm trying to get you, I mean, this loser
out of my house.  I think we're going to go to the police.

It right next to his work. I can take you there and you can 
stay there for a couple of hours" Tenchi said in a happy voice.

<Ken, as Tenchi>: Or a couple of years.  That's how dad got rid
of you last time, isn't it?

"Dad works on Sundays?" Gene said looking a bit confused.

"Only this one.. Some special project that had to be done by
tomorrow" Tenchi replied.

<Duo>: Yeah, he's probably "working" on his secretary.
<Cyrus>: Come on, I think Nobuyuki is a bit more sensitive than
that.

"Ok sure, I have to buy some clothes" Gene said as he started
to dig into his food again. Then he felt a few little tugs on his
shirt.
He looked to see what it was and it was Sesami with a question.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: When you go, could you never come back?

"Whats a mall Gene?" Sesami asked.

"You haven't ever been to one before? Well its a big building
with lots of little shops in them. 

<Cyrus, as Sasami>: What's a shop?

Hey why don't you come with me? You can help me pick out what to 
wear." Gene said with a warm and inviting smile on his face

<Duo, as Gene>: Besides, if you come with me, I'll have an excuse
to hang out in the girl's section.  That police officer kicked me
out last time.

'That be great!" Sesami said

<Ken>: Yeah, she's excited because she'll get to see one of these
fancy "malls".  I'm sure they have nothing like that on Jurai.

"Great can we come too?" Mihoshi said. In her usual cheery voice

"NO Mihoshi we have to go on patrol today" Kyone quickly said

<Kiyone, as herself>: Besides, that would make it harder for the
author to work in a pedophiliac rape scene.

"Ohhh" Mihoshi said with a little frown on her face.

"Ok that will be great then. Gene you, me and Sesami can go
into town and then you two can go to the mall while I see dad for
a couple of hours." Tenchi said getting excited.

"What about me Tenchi?" Ryoko said, almost begging.

<Cyrus>: Yeah, "almost" begging.  After all, Ryoko refuses to
beg.

"Sorry but today you and Aeka have chores to do." Tenchi replied

<Ken>: Yeah, you're going to leave Ryoko and Ayeka alone in the
house.  Why don't you just set the whole place on fire before you
leave?
<Cyrus>: Has anyone noticed that Ken's getting more sarcastic?
<Duo, sniffling>: Yeah, our little boy is growing up.  And when
I say our little boy, I don't mean that like we're some sort of
homosexual couple.
<Kiyone>: Gee, Duo, you're a real homophobe.
<Duo>: Sure, Miss "I AM NOT A LESBIAN!"
<Kiyone>: Oh, shut up.

Both Aeka and Ryoko got kind of mad. Then Gene was almost
expecting Washu to say something. He looked at her. * I guess I
should ask her too* he though. "What about you Little Washu?"

<Duo, as Washu>: Sorry, but I'm afraid you must be both physically
AND emotionally underage to ride the "Gene Mesaki".

"No thanks I have too many experiments" Washu replied. *Hmm
I've noticed that Gene and Sesami like each other a bit, maybe I'll
send a camera after them and watch them in secret*

<Kiyone>: Now that's just disgusting.

The meal ended in a hurry. Tenchi went upstairs into his room getting
his stuff together. Washu rushed into her lab, fixing some insect
cameras. 

<Cyrus>: Does anybody have any idea what these "insect cameras" are?
<Ken>: No.
<Duo>: No.
<Kiyone>: No.
<Cyrus>: Maybe the author's confusing her with Mr. X from "Action Man".
<Duo>: You watch "Action Man"?
<Cyrus>: Well, sometimes.  It's just...hey, look!  The fanfic's not
going to wait for us.

Aeka and Ryoko went up to the Shrine. Aeka brought some
food to Yosho, since he didn't come for lunch. Kyone and Mihoshi
went up into space. 

<Kiyone>: Unfortunately, we forgot our ship and our space suits, and
died.  Thus removing us from this awful story.

Nobuyuki was already at work. Ryo-ohki was with Ryoko. For some reason 
Ryo-ohki was very tired. Gene helped Sesami clean and dry the plates. 
He went upstairs and put on some other clothes. Then Sesami thought 
it was going to be a very special time, so

<Duo>: She made sure to carry protection.
<Kiyone>: Duo!
<Duo>: Uh, I meant...er, mace!  Yeah, mace!

she put on her clothes from the time of the carnival.

<Ken>: They hadn't been washed since the time of the carnival, so they
were starting to smell bad.

"Very nice Sesami" Gene said as he put on his shoes downstairs.

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Whew, those clothes stink.  It smells like you
wore them to a carnival and didn't wash them!

"Thank you" She said happily, then she put on her shoes.

Tenchi got ready and they all left. They all walked towards the bus
stop.

At the shrine, Yosho greeted the girls.
"Ahhh you've come to help me. Thank you very much. "Yosho said

<Kiyone, as Yosho>: Yes, I need you to sweep the yard!

"Here is some food for you" Aeka said as she gave him the food.

"Thank you very much." Yosho replied. He took the food and sat on
stairs. He finished his meal and he noticed that there was something
under his plate. 

<Cyrus>: OH MY GOD!  A BOMB!

It was a letter with 'Yosho" written on it. 

<Cyrus>: EVEN WORSE!  A LETTER BOMB!

Yosho was kind of confused. He opened the letter and it said.

<Cyrus>: BOOM! (a small cry is heard.)  What was that?
<Kiyone>: The joke.  You killed it.

'Dear Grandfather
   I know we have had our differences in the past but
lets put that behind us. It would warm Tenchis heart to
see us together as a whole family.
   - Gene'

"Hmm maybe I should give him a break" Yosho said to himself.

<Ken>: Don't!  Kick him out of your house forever!

Back that the bus stop. Tenchi, Gene and Sesami got on a taxi
instead of a bus. 

<Duo>: What the fuck?  Is it suddenly a taxi stop?  This is
just fucked up.  What is the significance of them riding a taxi?
Is it too difficult to ride the bus and at least have something
make sense?

They went all the way to Nobuyukis work place. They got off.

<Cyrus>: "They got off."  Yes, succinctness has always been a trait 
I've come to expect from Mr. Sinister.  And people with gaping head
wounds.

"Ok the mall is right there." Tenchi pointed to a big structure
with lots of people around it. "I have to go in this building and
see dad."

"Bye bye Tenchi" Sesami said as she waved to Tenchi.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Thanks for leaving me here with the pedophile!

"Ok we'll see you later man, at around 8 when the malls
close" Gene said. He looked at his watch and it was 1:30.
"Ready Sesami?"

"Yeah!" Sesami said very excited.

They walked towards the mall. The outside was packed with
people coming in and out. They got in and Sesamis eyes
opened wide. "Wow" She had never seen anything like this
except the carnival, but the mall was better.

<Ken>: Jurai must be one sad planet if this mall is the greatest
thing Sasami has ever seen.

There where 3 floors the bottom had normal shops and a
food court, the second floor was full of clothing, electronic
and other shops. The third floor was a movie theater. And
in the center of the mall was this giant water fountain. There
where lights under the fountain to give it special effects and
many different colors. Around the fountain there where lots
of kids splashing each other and playing around.

<Cyrus>: Until the 75-year-old security guard came and ran them 
off.

"So how do you like it? And where do you want to go first
Sesami?" Gene asked her.

"Wow it's great Gene, one of the greatest things I've ever
seen. We'll go anywhere you want to Gene." Sesami
said in amazement.

<Duo, as Gene>: Alright, how about the bathroom?

"Hmm how about a movie? But first" Gene said. He leaned
over and he held Sesamis hand. 

<Cyrus, as Gene>:  Sasami, I've only known you for a day, but
you're everything I've ever wanted in a woman.  You're young,
weaker than me, and young.  Did I mention young?  Anyway,
Sasami, will you marry me?
<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Hell no!

They walked over to the fountain. "Some people say that if 
you throw money into the fountain you can get a wish." 

<Ken>: And some people say that there are space satellites
from Kazakhstan trying to read their thoughts.  That doesn't
make it true.

He put his other hand into his pocked and pulled out some 
change. He gave some to Sesami and said. "Here you go, throw 
it in there and make a wish."

Sesami took the money. She closed her eyes and then she threw
the money into the fountain. 

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Damn, I'm still in this story.

Gene did the same thing. "Now lets go to the theatres. And watch 
a movie." He said with a little excitement in his voice.

<Duo, as Gene>: If I'm lucky, I might get to first base!

They took the elevator with the glass wall to the third floor. They
stopped in front of the cinema and read some of the movies.

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Hmmm..."Joe Dirt" looks good.

"Which one would you like to see Sesami?" Gene asked

"I don't mind Gene" Sesami said as she smiled as Gene.

"All right, how about this one called , Vampires." Gene said with
grin. He knew that its a scary movie. "2 Two for Vampires
please." He said to the ticket seller.

"Ehh isn't she a bit too young for this movie? It is very scary"
He young worker said.

<Ken>: Yeah, that and it's rated R.  She's a little girl, Gene.
<Duo>: I guess he wants to rape her body and mind.

"She told me to see this man, she seen it before. I haven't"
Gene replied.

"Ehh ok then" the guy said.

<Kiyone>: Yes, it's the stupidest ticket seller in the world!
He's been outsmarted by GENE MESAKI!

He gave them the tickets. "Ehh Gene did he say scary movie?"
Sesami said looking kind of worried.

"Hey don't worry its all fake and it wont scare the Princess
of Jurai. You've properly seen scarier monsters in really life"
He assured her that she wont be afraid.

<Cyrus>: Who here agrees with me when I say that Gene is an
asshole?
<Kiyone>: Is this some sort of trick question?
<Cyrus>: No.
<Kiyone>: Is it going to come back through some elaborate pun
that nobody's going to get and everybody will hate?
<Cyrus>: Well, maybe.
<Kiyone>: In that case, screw it and let's keep watching the fic.

"Okay then" She said

They walked into the lobby and towards the cashier.
"Hmm give me some, Sour Sweeties. And...... what drink
would you like Sesami?" He asked her.

<Duo, as Sasami>: Scotch on the rocks.

"Juice please." She said.

"Ok and two juices" He told the cashier. They got the snacks
 and went into theaters. No one was in there. It was only Gene
and Sesami. "Wow it looks like this movie is too scary for
people" He said in a jokeish way.

<Ken>: Uh-oh.
<Cyrus>: What?
<Ken>: I think I'm losing the blissful ignorance of youth?
<Cyrus>: In what way?
<Ken>: Well, they're the only two people in the theater.  Does
that mean there's probably going to be a lemon scene?
<Cyrus>: In a lot of stories, it probably would.  But in this
series, the lemons don't start until it says ~~~~THE STORY IS 
NOW GENE'S POINT OF VIEW~~~~.
<Ken>: Whew.
<Cyrus>: Don't worry.  I'll find a mindless sex fest and crush
your youthful optimism like a bug.
<Kiyone>: Dammit, would it kill you to let at least one of us
remain emotionally unscarred?

"What?" Sesami said with a really worried look.

"Hahahaha I'm just joking." Gene said.

<Duo>: Hahahaha...fuck you.
<Kiyone>: I agree.

He smiled and Sesami was happy again, she loved to see him
smile and he loved her smile. They sat down in the back middle.
The movie started.

<Cyrus>: Wouldn't it be funny if it was episode one of "The Gene
Mesaki Saga"?
<Kiyone>: Now that's a horror movie.

It was in a scary town, and this young female was walking alone
in this town. It was very dark and scary. Then out of nowhere
someone grabbed her and bit her in the neck.

<Duo>: Coincidentally enough, I was about to tell the author to
bite me.

Sesami got really worried and she let out a little scream. Gene
looked at her, and he didn't want her to be scared so he sunk
lower on his seat. Then he grabbed her arm, and put his head on
her shoulder. Then he said "I'm scared Sesami, please hold me"
He acted it very well, it actually sounded like he was scared.
He even shivered sometimes.

<Kiyone>: Yeah, it's an "act".  Wink, wink.

Sesami looked over to him. She wasn't scared anymore. She
saw how scared he was, and she forgot about herself. "Don't be
scared. Here I'll hold you." She put her arm around Genes
shoulder and she held him tight. Then she put her head on his head.

<Duo>: At least it's not in his lap.

"Tha - tha - thank you Sesami" Gene said. *Very nice, shes not
scared anymore. Normally it works the other way, but whatever.
I just don't want her to be scared.* He thought to himself.

<Ken>: She won't be scared.  At least not until the rape scene.
<Cyrus>: YES!! There goes more of that youthful bliss!
<Kiyone>: Are you some sort of sadist?
<Cyrus>: Actually, I'm a bit of a masochist.

"Very good Gene." Washu said very proudly as she watched them
on a big screen t.v in her lab. She sent some insect cameras after
them to spy on them. "So he does like her, and she likes him back."

<Kiyone>: AND YOU DON'T FIND A PROBLEM WITH THIS, WASHU?
<Cyrus>: Yeah, I would think she would at least be looking out for
Sasami, and not looking at her.

Gene and Sesami watched the movie , they ate their snacks and drank
their juice. Every time, the Vampire killed a girl, Gene let out a
little
"AHHHH, OH NO" He said it just to act very scared.

<Duo>: Yeah, it's an act.
<Kiyone>: WINK.  WINK.
<Ken>: Indeed.

Every time he screamed, Sesami held him tighter. She wasn't even
scared at all. The movie ended at 4. They walked out.  " Thank you
Sesami. " Gene said

<Duo, as Gene>: I get turned on when little girls hold me.

"Its ok. I thought that you weren't afraid of anything?" Sesami said.

"Well, I am a few times."Gene smiled at her. "Now lets go shopping!"

<Duo>: Thanks, Gene.  If we needed more proof that you were a possible
homosexual.
<Cyrus>: What about when he screwed Kiyone.
<Duo>: Denial.  Like they say at that Ryoko and Ayeka shrine of love.

They got in the glass elevator. Sesami loved watching the fountain as
it changed from yellow to green then blue, and purple. It kept on
changing colors. They went down to the second floor and Gene saw
a swimming store.

<Ken>: Actually, it's just floating.

"Hey Sesami, we have like a pool in the house right?" Gene asked her.

"No Gene it's a hot spring" Sesami replied.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: You fucking moron.

"Oh ok well I don't have any swimming trunks there. Let's go get
some" Gene said.

<Duo>: Damn, this Gene guy needs to watch his mouth.
<Cyrus>: What?
<Duo>: "Come on, Sasami, let's go get some."
<Cyrus>: What a pervert.

Sesami knew that it was only for girls, but a part of her didn't want
to tell Gene. 

<Duo>: Don't worry, Gene already knew that.

She didn't know why but she wanted to see him in trunks.
She had never seen a man nearly naked before.

<Kiyone>: Except for the hundred times Tenchi ended up in the woman's
bath.

They walked in and Gene walked towards the men section.

<Ken>: I thought Sasami just said it was only for girls?  Why is there
a men's section?

"There are soo many choices. What should I try on?" Gene said, not 
knowing which one to choose. He saw 2 different ones he liked. One was 
blue and it had two yellow stripes on each side. The other one was white
with red flowers all around it. 

<Duo>: I swear, I think the sex scenes are just so we won't think Gene's
remarkably gay.

"Well Sesami I like these 2 but which one do you prefer?"

Sesami looked at the 2 trunks. She felt them and she said "Well try
them on and we'll see which one looks better on you. But I really like
the flower one"

"O.k there are the changing rooms right there" Gene said as he walked
towards the room.

<Duo, as Gene>: Do you want to come in?

"I'll sit right here" Sesami replied as she sat down on the waiting
seat.

The store was filled with lots of people. It was the summer time and
all the woman were trying to get the latest fashions. Gene quickly put
on the flower pair of trunks. Then he came out. He walked over to
Sesami and turned around. This woman in the store was in total shock
she dropped the bikini in her hand as soon as she saw Gene.

<Kiyone, as Woman>: That is the ugliest man I have ever seen!

"Well Sesami? You like this one?" Gene said.

"Wow Gene that looks great" Sesami replied in a cheery voice. "I have
ehh..." She said while she looked at Genes body.

<Ken>: In disgust.

Since Gene's a boxer and he's 6'2 he was pretty huge. His arms are the
size of tree trunks. Huge chest, she had never seen any one in that
kind of shape before. 

<Cyrus>: Except maybe Jesse Helms.

She was totally shocked. 8 pack of abs and not a single pound of fat.

<Ken>: Only because Japan uses the metric system.

"Something wrong Sesami?" Gene said, he started to look worried.

"Wow are you some kind of bodybuilder? I swear I've seen you
somewhere before" This woman replied, she couldn't take her eyes of
Gene.

<Kiyone, as Woman>: Weren't you the bad guy in "Overdrawn at the
Memory Bank"?
<Cyrus>: Have you been watching my MST3K tapes?
<Kiyone>: Yeah.

"What? Eh I'm a boxer?" Gene replied in a confused look.

<Duo, as Gene>: I thought I was just a pedophile!

"No way your Gene Mesaki aren't you? please let me have a picture
with you" This guy said.

<Ken>: Now is this the woman and that's just a typo, or is there
a guy there now?
<Duo>: Maybe she was a transsexual.
<Ken>: A what?
<Duo>: Uhhhh...nevermind.

"Yeah but let me get me clothes, then later I'll take a pic with you...
Now Sesami are you ok?" Gene said as he kneeled down before her.
He put both his hands on either both sides of the chair.

"There isn't anything wrong" Sesami said as she smiled at Gene.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Just smile and nod.

"Ok thats good, I can't believe I got worried over nothing." Gene
replied. But for some reason he couldn't move or maybe he didn't
want to move. He gazed into Sesamis eyes. He couldn't look away.

She couldn't look away hes self. Gene kept on wishing that he
could kiss her, but he didn't cause she was way too young.

<Cyrus>: Yeah, like that's ever stopped anybody in a lemon.

It felt like they looked at each other for a million years. They looked
deeper and deeper into each others souls.

<Ken>: Excuse me, it's closing time.

"Excuse me" The lady said who is working there. "Those trunks look
great on you, you certainly have the body for it."

<Duo, as Woman>: Yeah, we never thought anybody would ever buy the 56
waist.

Gene suddenly snapped out of it "Yeah I'll take these. Let me just go
and take them off first." Gene got up and started to walk back to the
changing room.

"Aww what a cute little girl" The woman said as she looked at Sesami.
"You have such a cute daughter" She said to Gene.

Sesami smiled and blushed. Gene stopped and he was stunned then he
 said "DAUGHTER? what are you talking about."

<Duo, as Gene>: She's my girlfriend!

"Ohh I'm sorry then you have such a lovely sister. I see that you both
come from a very pretty family." The woman said.

<Cyrus, as Woman>: Yeah, a PRETTY UGLY family!  Except for Sasami.
She's so Kawaii!

Sesami started to giggle now.

"Hahaha I don't know what your talking about. Thats my future wife!"
Gene said as he joked around.

"You sicko" The woman said as the walked back towards the cashier

<Everyone simultaneously>: My sentiments exactly. (everyone looks
at each other)
<Cyrus>: Hey, this is great!  We're really coming together as a
MST team!

Sesami was totaly stunned. She froze and thought *Whhhatt? future
wife?*

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: That's disgusting!

Gene looked at Sesami and he started to laugh even louder. Sesami
was totally confused. "Hey I was joking Sesami. I just met you last
night. BWAHAHAHAHA!" He said to her. Then he turned around
and walked back to the change room.

<Ken>: Yeah, like that'd stop you.

"Oh ok Gene I get it." Sesami said as she laughed back, and she
waited.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Maybe that woman's calling the police, and
they'll come rescue me.

Gene put on his clothes and walked towards the woman at the
cashier, "Hey your not good at taking jokes are you?" He said
to her.

"Oh I'm sorry, I see your a very funny man" She said .

<Cyrus>: While she's busy pressing the silent alarm.

Gene paid her the money. Sesami and Gene said goodbye to
the woman. They walked around all around the mall. They went
to nearly all the stores. Every time Gene bought something, He also
bought something for Sesami. She didn't want to get anything
but Gene kept on insisting.

<Duo, as Gene>: Here's a stuffed animal, Sasami!
<Kiyone, as Sasami>: But I don't want a stuffed animal!
<Duo, as Gene>: TAKE THE DAMN ANIMAL.
<Kiyone, as a scared Sasami>: Okay.

Everywhere they walked people always stopped them and asked
for an autograph or a picture. People couldn't believe that the
Heavy Weight Champion of the world was in that little town.

<Cyrus, as a Random Person>: God, this is why I moved away
from the big cities.  People like him.
<Kiyone, as a Second Random Person>: Yeah, but do you see
the way we're all mocking him?  "What a body?" Ha!
<Cyrus, as the first Random Person>: Yeah, and he even
believes it, too?
<Ken, as Yet Another Random Person>: Boy, the quality of
boxing has really gone downhill since they banned strong,
attractive people.  Now he's the best they can do?
<Duo, as the Fourth, or maybe the Third, Random Person>: Look
at the way he's hitting on that little girl.  Someone should
call the cops.

"Wow Gene your very popular" Sesami said to him. She was
starting to get bored of waiting for people to take picture.

<Duo>: Is this mall full of people doing photography for some sort
of magazine about disfigurement fetishes?

"Well eh thanks Sesami..." He looked at her and he saw she was
getting kind of bored. "Hey why don't we go to the pet shop and
then we'll head back see Dad and Tenchi."

<Cyrus>: Good idea.  Maybe we can buy a goldfish and watch it die!

Sesami put a smile on her face. "That sounds great!"

Genes hand were full of shopping bags. But he still managed to
go to the pet shop. They walked into the store, they saw all
the little dogs. They petted most of them. Then they played with
the cats.

<Duo>: At least it's not heavy petting.
<Kiyone>: That's disgusting.

"Hey doesn't this little cat remind you of that little Ryo-ohki ?"
Gene said to Sesami while he petted the little black kitten.

<Kiyone, as Sasami>: Yes, that small, black kitten reminds me of
Ryo-Ohki.  And so does that orange, spotted one!  And that parrot!
Moron.

Every little animal seemed to love Sesami. The little black
kitten went between Sesamis ankles and rubbed its body
against Sesami. It let out little purrs. Sesami enjoyed it a lot.

"Hehe shes tickling me." Sesami said as she giggled.

<Duo>: This isn't going to turn into a lemon scene, is it?
<Cyrus>: Remember, we're not in ~~~GENE'S POINT OF VIEW~~~.
<Duo>: Whew.

"You know we could buy her Sesami but that would make
Ryo-ohki jelous" Gene said to Sesami. 

<Ken>: Yeah, sure it would.  After all, she's only smarter
than a lot of people I know.  And she can turn into a spaceship.
I'm sure she'll be very threatened by the small black fuzzball.

Suddenly Gene started to smell something. He wasn't sure but what I
t was but it was some kind of disease. Genes virus makes his senses 
stronger.

<Kiyone>: Ah, yes.  The virus.  We know a lot about it.  After all
you've alluded to it all of two times in the entire series.

"Hey I think there is something on that cat Sesami, let's go"

"Yeah I wouldn't want to make Ryo-ohki sad anyways."
Sesami said to Gene as she hopped towards him.

<Cyrus>: What are we doing?  Are we trying to expand our
vocabulary of verbs?  Does Sasami really need to hop towards
him?
<Duo>: All good questions.  Maybe you'd like to talk to the
author and find out the answers?
<Cyrus>: Ugh.  No.

Washu was confused. "What? There is something on the cat?"
Then she made the insect fly towards the cat. She started to
analyze the cat. "Hmm how odd, Gene smelling sense is
unusually strong for a human. He smelled that the cat had
a special type of animal cancer."

<Ken>: MY ASS!
<Duo>: Woah, Ken swore!
<Cyrus>: I know.
<Ken>: Look, there is no way that someone could smell cancer.
This sort of crap just really ticks me off.  I'll try not
to do it again.

"Here Sesami, do me a favor and go wash up, I think that
little kitty cat was dirty." Gene asked Sesami nicely. They
where right outside a washroom anyways.

<Kiyone>: Thank you, Dr. Mesaki.  Since cancer is a communicable
disease, and all, she should wash her hands.  Perhaps she should
wear a Hazard Suit so she doesn't accidentally catch polar/bipolar
disorder from a depressed person.

"Ok I'll be right back" Sesami quickly rushed into the
washroom. She cleaned up and came back. "Gene
my legs are tired." She said to him.

Gene looked at his wrist watch. "Wow it is 7:50.
All right, If you hold these 2 bags then I'll pick you up and
I'll hold you and you put them on your lap."

<Duo>: Wait, is he going to carry her in front of him, like
she sits on his hands?
<Cyrus>: I think, although clarity has never been Mr. Sinister's
forte.
<Duo>: So he's going to be walking around the mall holding this
little girl's ass, and nobody's going to call the cops?
<Cyrus>: You know what I say, Duo.
<Duo>: Right.  Smile and nod.

"Ok Gene" Sesami said. She was kind of tired and so was
Gene.

<Ken>: Gee, I thought a man of his slick muscular physique
would be able to walk around for three hours without getting
fatigued.

Gene put his hands on Sesamis weist, then he picked her up.
He put his right forearm under Sesami. She sat comfortably.

<Duo>: Whew.  She's not sitting on his hands.

And then she put 2 light bags on he lab, then she rested her
head on Genes right chest. She really liked his muscles and
he knew it.

<Kiyone>: "His muscles".  Yeah, all two of them.

Then they walked out of the mall and towards the building.

<Duo>: You know, THE building.

As soon as they came to the front doors. Tenchi and
Nobuyuki came outside.

<Cyrus, as Tenchi>: Damn.  He's still around.

"Hey there" Nobuyuki said. "Here let us help you out.
Get some of those bags, Tenchi"

"Ok dad" Tenchi replied "Wow Sesami  must have had
a fun day. It looks like shes dead sleep"

<Ken>: Yeah, I always look dead after I've had a fun
day.  Or after I've been shot.

"Yeah no kidding, but all we did was walk around.
Thanks for taking these bags away" Gene said happily
but kind of tired.

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Sorry, I'm having an elaborate series
of heart attacks.

Tenchi took all the bags. Nobuyuki got a taxi and he
sat in the front. While Sesami was alseep on Genes chest.
"Hey whats quiet a load there. What did you buy?"
Nobuyuki said.

<Duo, as Gene>: Well, there's some bondage equipment, three
feet of felt, and an inflatable penguin.
<Cyrus, as Nobuyuki>: All right!!

"Well I bought stuff for everyone. Well just me, you, Tenchi
Yosho and Sesami here, I dont really care about the rest"
Gene said.

<Kiyone>: What an asshole.
<Ken>: Yeah, especially how he doesn't care about you after
sleeping with you.

The 3 Mesaki men chatted while coming home. The taxi
finally reached home after 30 minutes. They all got out and
Nobuyuki was going to pay for the ride but Gene didn't let
him. "Look Dad I make much more money than you, and I
have enough. I'll pay for it" Gene said to his dad.

<Duo, as Gene talking to Cabbie>: Look, buddy, I'm trying
to impress my folks.  I can't pay you, but if you come back
later I'll give you a blow-- 
<Kiyone>: A what?
<Duo>: A blow pop.  Mmm, mmm.  The delicious bubblegum taste
is surely worth a cab ride.

"Hmm something surely smells good" Tenchi said as he
sniffed around.

<Cyrus, as a Cowboy>: Wooo-hooo!  Something surely does
smell spectacular!

"Thats weird Sesami is here with us, I wonder who did the
cooking at home?" Nobuyuki said.

<Ken>: That's right.  Everyone at home is too incompetent
to fix food for themselves, to the point of starvation.
<Cyrus>: It's sad, isn't it?

"Hahahaha what you two are telling me that none of the
other girls can cook?" Gene said laughing really loudly.

<Cyrus>: Can I please steal a line from MST3K?
<Kiyone>: I guess.
<Cyrus>: Alright. (clears throat) I'm Bob Jackass.
<Ken>: That was it?
<Cyrus>: It fit the scene!  I mean, Gene really is an asshole!
<Kiyone>: Whatever.

He woke up Sesami. She looked around and then she
rubber her eyes and said. "Oh we are home?"

<Duo, as Gene>: That's right!  Now time to die.

"Yup" Gene replied to her. Then he slowly put her down
and they all walked into the house.

Tenchi opened the door and the group walked in.
They took of their shoes and put the back on the steps.
Then they all walked into the living room and they saw
Mihoshi, Kyone, Aeka and Ryoko sitting around the
table.

<Cyrus>: They are the knights of the dinner table!
Lady, Ayeka, the pretentious...
<Ken>: ...Lady Ryoko, the lazy...
<Kiyone>: ...Lady Mihoshi, the ditzy...
<Duo>: ...and Lady Kiyone, the bitch.
<Kiyone>: Hey!

"Wow who cooked?" Tenchi said as he was amazed.

"That would be me" Yosho replied as he walked out of
the kitchen.

<Cyrus>: Yes, it's Action Yosho!  He sits, he cooks,
he sits, he fights, he sits again! 
<Ken>: Action Yosho and Action Yosho's bokken sold
separately.

"Grandpa.. Ehhh I mean Yosho. How are you?" Gene
said. He hasn't seen his former master in years.

Gene bowed to Yosho and he bowed back. They all
sat around the table and Gene told Yosho about his
entire past. 

<Kiyone>: I'm pretty sure you established that Yosho
was there for most of his past.

Just before they started to dig into the food Washu came 
out of her lab, in her adult form and in
a skirt.

<Duo>: Oh, shit.
<Cyrus>: What?
<Duo>: It's going to switch to ~~~GENE'S POINT OF VIEW~~~
soon, isn't it?
<Cyrus>: Well...
<Duo>: Isn't it?
<Cyrus>: Yeah.

"Wow Washu you decided to show up" Sesami said.

"Yeah and in your adult form" Ryoko replied in a suspicious
voice.

<Kiyone>: Join the club, Ryoko.

"Well I was kind of tired of being a child. So I thought that
I would be a adult for a couple of days" Washu replied as
she sat down. 

<Duo>: Sure, why not just throw the whole psychological problem
out the window, Mr. Sinister?  Washu can just decide to become
an adult whenever she wants.  She doesn't need some sort of deep
psychological breakthrough.  She just needs to get horny around
your shitty character!
<Cyrus>: You're a Wahsu fan, aren't you?
<Duo>: Well, yeah.

She didn't kneel down but she crossed her legs and she was sittting 
opposide Gene.

*Hmmm She kinda cute in her adult form* Gene thought
"Adult form? Thats weird, you can change whenever you want?"
Gene said trying to look confused.

<Ken>: Yeah, he really needs to make an effort to look confused.
<Duo>: It's probably harder than looking like an asshole for him.

"Yes I can change any time I please" Washu replied.

<Duo, as Gene>: Well, why don't you change back to the kid form.
It turns me on a lot more.

After a couple of minutes, Gene started to smell something
that turned him on. He wasn't sure what it was but he kept
on thinking. *Why am I smelling pussy? It must be Washu
she isn't waring anything under her skirt*

<Kiyone>: Oh, god.  What is this crap?  His super senses allow
him to smell pussy?
<Duo>: You'd think he would be overwhelmed by the smell of
Tenchi, then.

*Good I think hes noticing, it's been a while since I have
had a man, and I do want to study this 'Virus' of his
so I would need a sperm sample* Washu thought to herself
as she looked at him, and he looked back.

<Ken>: Because, as we all know, viruses are transmitted through
sperm only.

*Why is she doing this to me? I can almost taste her in my
mouth. I can't control it. I have to have her. But I dont want
her" Gene thought. 

<Duo, as Gene>: She's too old!

He looked at his food and he started to chow down. He 
was trying not to think of her pussy but her kept on 
thinking * I wonder if she has pink hair. Hehehe* 

<Kiyone, yelling at the screen>: YES WE ALL HAVE PUBIC 
HAIR THE SAME COLOR AS OUR OTHER HAIR!!
<Cyrus>: Calm down, Kiyone.
<Kioyne, yelling at the screen>: DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY
VAGINA, GODDAMMIT?  DO YOU?
<Cyrus>: Now calm down...
<Duo>: Shut up, Cyrus, this could be good.
<Kiyone>: Thanks, Duo, your perversion brought me back
down to Earth.
<Duo>: Shit.

Then he said. "So Washu could you examine this virus in me?"

"Sure after dinner just come to my lab and I'll help you out"
She replied with a smile.

<Cyrus>: An EROTIC smile, indeed.

*Hmmm how odd, normally Washu doen't have time for
anyone* Yosho thought quietly to himself.

<Ken>: Is Yosho setting new records for stupidity in this
fic?

Dinner ended quickly. Sesami went to the kitchen to clean the
dishes. Washu to her lab. Aeka, Mihoshi, Kyone and Ryoko
went to watch some t.v. Yosho went to his shrine with
Nobuyuki, they took some sucke with them to celebrate the
family being whole again. 

<Kiyone>: Ah, yes.  "Sucke".  I think that should be the
official drink of this story.
<Cyrus>: Why, there's so much "sucke" in this story it might
as well be an advertisement for the stuff!

Tenchi went to his room to study. It looks like everyone 
had forgotten about Gene so after Washu went into her lab, 
Gene waited for 10 minutes and he decided to follow.

<Ken>: They've forgotten about Gene already?  What are they,
goldfish?

Gene opened the lab door and walked in for the first time ever.
It was all black. He didn't know what to do so he just walked
foward. Then he fell into a dark black tunned. He landed on
the hard ground and then he shook his head.

<Duo>: God willing, he broke his neck.

~~~~~GENES POINT OF VIEW STARTS HERE~~~~~

<Cyrus>: Woah, way to mix it up, Mr. Sinister.

"Shit my head hurts. The the hell would put a damn
tunnel in the middle of no where?"

<Ken>: You obviously don't know Washu.

"Ahh are you hurt?" Washu said to me.

I looked up and I saw her in a nusres outfit. She had the
top, the hat and the short mini skirt on.

<Cyrus and Duo>: Heellllloooooo, Nurse!

"Here I can examine you and I can help you. " She said
to me in a seductive voice.

<Kiyone>: Yeah.  Help him get off.

I got up, and I looked around. It looked like a doctors
office. It had everything, the doctor examination table. But
this one cabinet was weird. 

<Ken>: It had a bunch of shrunken heads in mason jars.

here was a sign on it saying 'LUBRICANTS' I walked 
towards the examination table and I sat down on it.

"WHAAAA! Where are my clothes" I looked down on
myself and all I saw was that I was in my boxers.

<Duo>: Yes, that's our masculine Gene Mesaki, crying like a
baby.

"Well I can't examine you if you're wearing all your clothes
now can I? Now back at the dinner. You smelled me didn't you?
You want me don't you?" She told me.

<Kiyone>: What a slut.
<Cyrus>: You have room to talk, after the last chapter.
<Kiyone, muttering>: Shut up.

"It's not me that wants you but it......" There was that smell again.
I smelled her pussy again, and I got a hard on straight away.

<Duo, as Gene>: It's my Mighty Johnson!  I can't control it!
<Cyrus>: Ugh.  Shinji the 10 o'clock Assassin.

I got up and she walked towards me. I picked her up and sat her
down on the table. Then slowly I pulled her skirt up. I wasn't in
the mood for kissing or any of that shit. 

<Kiyone>: Yeah, lemon writers don't believe in foreplay.

Then I saw it, I saw her lovely pussy and a patch of pink pupic 
hair above it. 

<Ken>: "Pupic hair"?  Does that have something to do with pupae?
<Cyrus>: Like the insect larval stage?
<Ken>: Yeah.
<Cyrus>: Great, Ken.  You just associated maggots with sex.
<Ken>: Crap.

I pushed her skirt up all the way and I went down really fast. I 
want that damn pussy. I kissed the lips of her pussy and she let 
out a little moan.

<Kiyone, as Washu>: Ohhhh, please get away from me, you sick creep.

"Hmmm don't do me slowly, fuck me like an animal" She
begged me.

<Duo, as Washu>: Yeah, fuck me like a duck-billed platypus.

So I wasted no time, I opened her pussy lips and ran my tongue
up and down it. Then I showed my tongue all he way. I tasted her
precum while I messaged her ass with my hands. 

<Cyrus>: Alright, I'm by no means an expert in sex, but I'm pretty
sure that precum is a guy thing.

I drove my tongue deeper and deeper. She moaned and screamed. I can 
fell her juices comming down onto my tongue.

<Ken>: Let's pick a tense and stay with it, people.

Then I found her hole and I tried harder and harer to shove my tongue
in her. She arched her back trying to get me all the way.

"AHHHH ITS BEEN TOO LONG" She shouted.
"TOOOOOOOOO LOOOONNNGGGGGGGGG.
AHHHHHHHHHH, YES GENE YES " She started screaming
at the top of her voice.

<Kiyone>: If she likes this guy, it has been a long time.

As I tongued in deeper I felt her muscles tightening around my
tongue. Two muscles, one on each side. I liked faster and faster.
Then she finally cummed.

<Duo>: Instead of frowning, ladies, clench your vagina!  It only
takes two muscles!

She let out another long scream.
"AHHHHHHH"

<Kiyone, as Washu>: What am I doing!

And then I felt her warm semen run down my tongue. It was warm
and salty. 

<Cyrus>: Ken was talking about picking a tense and staying with
it.  Try picking a gender and sticking with it.  If you want
semen, have him screw a guy.

I shoved my mouth into her pussy. I was trying to gulp it all up. 
She just kept on squirting at me. She shot at least 5 loads
into my mouth and I couldn't stop drinking it. I needed more.

<Duo>: This is what happens when there's no sex education in 
schools.
<Ken>: Not to mention grammar.

"Stop there none left" She said gasping for air" My turn now"

<Kiyone, as Washu>: Alright, rook to queen's knight four.  Your
turn again.

I stopped and I looked up at the. I couldn't control myself anymore.
It had taken over again. I jumped onto the table and I ripped of my
pants.

<Cyrus>: But you--
<Ken>: Let me take care of this.
<Cyrus>: Alright.  I get the next easy one.
<Ken>: I think he said earlier that Gene was wearing nothing but
boxers.  Did he just pick up his pants and tear them in half?
<Cyrus>: Good one!
<Duo>: Nerds.

I leaned back a little and I rested on my elbows. She looked at my
cock and it looked like it had grown. 

<Kiyone>: Watch as the story ramps up the sexual ignorance!
<Cyrus>: Well, it might have grown, but you really can't be
sure.

She kneeled on the table and she took my dick into her right hand.

<Duo>: More like in between her thumb and forefinger.

"Alright my advice is that I start to...." She was saying.

<Kiyone, as Washu>: Take you apart, molecule by molecule.

"I don't give a fuck what you think just shut up and suck" I said
to her. But I didn't say it in my normal voice, I said it in a dark
and a very evil voice. Almost devilish. She notice but she didn't care.

<Duo>: Oh no, his "demon" voice!  I hope it's scarier than the annoying,
girlish whine I imagine him having.

Then she put her left hand on my dick and she started to jack it off.

<Cyrus, as Gene>: Then I woke up, and realized it was my hand on my
own dick.

She moved her head right above my dick. She slowly opened her
mought and put my dick in her mouth. She started to suck like
a fucking vacum. 

<Ken>: Mr. Sinister, the master of the analogy.

She licked then sucked . She was rubbing her hand up and down my 
dick at the same time.  I felt her saliva run down my dick. Then 
she removed my hand and she sucked down and deeper.  She went 
down all the way. My dick was proberly down her throat.

<Duo>: Actually, it was "proberly" tickling her incisors.

I started to cum. " Oh shit right there" I said. She kept on sucking
and sucking. 

<Kiyone>: Just like this story.

Then she swallowed. I cummed right into her throat and she kept on 
swallowing.

"Ohhh FUCK YES" I said to her.

<Kiyone, as Washu>: Yes?  Who's Yes?  If he's better than you,
I'll definitely fuck him.

"MMMMmmm That tastes way to good" She replied licking her
lips.

<Ken>: Maybe while we weren't looking she drank some Kool-Aid.

Then I got up and stood up again. She sat up and she was in the
same position we started of when I liked her. I wacked my dick
trying to get it up. 

<Cyrus>: That would explain the bruises.
<Kiyone>: I hope he uses the weed whacker.

But then I smelled her pussy and I saw the pink patch, my 
dick came up automatically. 

<Duo>: Maybe it's the cybernetic enhancements.

She spread her legs open, and I couldn't take it. I grabbed 
the top of my dick and I guided it into her pussy.

<Cyrus>: Man, at least the 10-chi clan crap had the comical 
[SPLOOOSH!!] or whatever the hell.
<Ken>: We aren't going to do those, are we?
<Cyrus>: No, I think everyone else has them taken care of.

Then let out a little moan, and I went deeper into her clit. 

<Kiyone>: Right, clitoris is a synonym for vagina.  I get the
feeling that the person who wrote this got their sexual experience
from the other bad lemons out there.
<Duo>: Either that, or someone with a really fucked up anatomy.

I found her hole right away. So she shifted towards me and I grabbed 
her ass and pulled her closer. Now her pussy was wet and it was
getting tighter. I felt the muscles on both side suezzing my dick.
It felt like it was gonna eat my dick.

<Duo>: Quick vote: if it were to bite his dick off, who here would
be happy?  (everyone raises their hands)  Just checking.

I went in deeper and deeper and Washu was in more and more
pain. "Please stop Gene" she said. "Stop it hurts too much"
She begged me. But I didn't care. 

<Kiyone>: When Washu and I are falling for this asshole, the author
is really fucked up.
<Duo>: Yeah, but so are you and Washu.

I just kept on fucking her faster and deeper.

<Cyrus>: We're a lot like Washu in this situation.
<Duo>: Really?  How?
<Cyrus>: We're all fucked.

I nearly reached my climax and I nearly came
but something inside my head said *STOP, GIVE HER MORE
PAIN, FUCK HER UP THE ASS AND RIP HER APART*
So I did just that. I stopped and she was going to pass out.

<Duo>: Right.  You just stopped.

"No more, I can't take it anymore. This isn't fun" she begged
me to stop again but I wasn't in control.

<Ken>: Ah, yes, there's a great excuse.

"IM NOT DONE WITH YOU YET" I told her as I whispered
into her ear and my voice got worse and Eviler.

<Cyrus>: Unfortunately, the whole evil effect is kind of
ruined by your horrible grammar.  It's like trying to feel
threatened by a poorly dubbed villain.
<Ken>: All your base are belong to us!

"Wha- what will you do?" She said

"You'll see. I mean you'll feel it" I replied to her.

<Duo>: You'd better not be using your sorry excuse for a penis
if you want her to feel it.

Then I stood her up and turned her around. She palms were
right into on the table as she was trying to get a grip. She was
too low for me as I picked her up and I kneeled her on the
table. Now her ass hole was parallel to my dick. 

<Cyrus>: In analytical geometry terms: (_|_) || <=3
<Ken>: I love ASCII characters.

I bowed in front of her and I gave her a rim job. I started to 
like around and into her anus. She was enjoying as she moaned 
in pleasure.

<Kiyone>: I was going to tell Gene to eat shit, but it looks
like he's one step ahead of me.
<Duo>: And you tell me not to give the authors ideas.

Then I stopped and I put my hard dick right into her ass. I
in half way and she alked me to go slower but I did the
opposide so I went faster. 

<Cyrus, as Gene>: You didn't say Simon says, bitch!

I pushed in deeper and deeper. And then I could hear her crying. 
I put my hands on her weist and I pushed harder and harder I felt 
that her as was way too hard. I ripped her anus and I could feel 
her blood going down my balls. It dripped onto the floor and made 
a little puddle.

<Ken>: I hate everything.  I hate you most of all, Cyrus.  You
bastard.
<Cyrus>: I think you need a week off, Ken.  I'll look for a
special guest.

I fucked her harder and deeper I wanted to stop but I had
no control. Then I finally cummed into her ass. "Ohh shiit"
I said in relief. 

<Duo>: At least she isn't taking a shit.

I cummed and cummer and I saw her tears come down her chin as 
she gasped for air.

<Kiyone>: What, was he fucking the wrong end or something?

I turned her around and sat her on the edge of the table.
"OUCH THAT HURTS" she said.

<Cyrus, as Washu>: I got a boo-boo on my bum-bum!

I looked at he but she didn't look back. All she did was cry
and look down at the puddle of blood.

"Look I'm soo sorry Washu. It's not my fault I did that.
It was the virus." 

<Duo,as Gene>: Yes!  The virus!  Of course!  It can...er, 
control my mind!  Of course!

Then she looked up at me and I tightly hugged her. I started 
to shake. Then I started to cry and tears came down my face. 
"I cant-t-t-t control it. It's too power full."

<Kiyone>: You just literally ripped her a new one, and you're
the one crying?
<Duo>: I know.  What a fucking sissy.

She stopped the hug and she couldn't belive that I was crying.
"I'll help you Gene" She said to me. Then she hugged me
tightly and said " I can do. Only I can do it!"

<Ken>: Where are the puppets?  Won't they come out and say 
something?
<Cyrus, as Puppet A>: You're the best Washu, only you can
cure him of his disease!
<Duo, as Puppet B>: Or you could just kill him!
<Duo and Cyrus, as the Puppets>: Hooray for Washu!

~~~~~~~THE END~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well what did you all thing?

<Duo>: Let me make a gesture to express my feelings.
<Cyrus>: Nobody can see it.  You have to put it in 
parentheses, like this: (Cyrus flicks off the screen).

Did you all think that Gene was gonna sleep with Sesami?

<Kiyone>: Yeah, but you showed us.  Having him sleep with the
other ten year-old!  You fiend!

Tell me how you liked my lemon. E-mail me at
CMDR_DUFF@YAHOO.COM

<Ken>: What if we want to tell him how much we hated it?
<Cyrus>: I think we're more than saying our piece with this
MST.
<Ken>: Wow, I feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
<Cyrus>: That's the feeling you get when you do something 
good for the fanfic community.

_______________________________________________________________________

"Ugh," groaned Duo as he stepped out of the theater.  "Is it my
imagination, or did that suck more than the first one?"

"It wasn't your imagination," Ken replied.

"I didn't think it was worse," Kiyone said.

"That's just because your didn't get fucked in this one," Duo
quickly rebutted.

"Yeah, you're probably right."

Cyrus walked out of the theater with the spring in his step that
was never lost, despite the crappiness of the fic.  "So guys,"
he began, sitting down at his computer, "what'd you think of this
one?"

Duo spoke up first.  "We all think it was worse than the first Gene
Mesaki thing.  Except for Kiyone, but that's just because she wasn't
screwed in this one."

"Yeah," replied Cyrus, "I enjoy a good anal rape as much as the next
guy--that is to say, not at all--but this story was just sickening."

"Yeah, I loved how he thought he tricked us by dropping all of these
not-so-subtle hints that Gene and Sasami were in love with each other,
then having him sleep with Washu.  Good one, Mr. Sinister!" Kiyone
interjected.

"Hey, Cyrus," Ken called to get his attention.

"Yeah?"

"Were you serious when you said you'd give me a week off?" he asked.

"Well, maybe.  I guess if I find a special guest we could give you
a week off," Cyrus replied.

"What about Wormon?" Ken asked, an idea formulating in his head.

"Sure.  Anyone who convinces Wormon to fill in for them can sit out
a week," Cyrus replied, grinning mischievously.

At that moment, Wormon walked in.  "Hi guys, what's up?" he asked.

Everyone except Cyrus immediately turned around; they all had the
look in their eyes of a predator about to leap on its prey.  "Hello,
Wormon," they all said together.

"Guys?" Wormon asked, more than a little scared.

"He's mine!" Ken, Duo, and Kiyone all yelled at each other.  They
quickly turned back to Wormon, and charged towards him.  Wormon
ran away as fast as his little legs would carry him, trying to
escape to the elevator.  As the other three ran out of the lounge,
Cyrus shook his head.

"Idiots," he muttered to himself.  "Hey where's that ballad?  I
think I'll listen to it again!"

_______________________________________________________________________

Thanks to the usual suspects, Jackson, Nick, and David.  Also,
thanks to Smolken for his comments, which inspired me to write
"The Ballad of Zap Rowsdower".  Sorry if you didn't understand
the ballad, but I figured I'd make the trade-off and leave some
of the readers in the dark on purpose.  Why wouldn't you have 
watched the MST3K of "The Final Sacrifice", anyway? As usual, 
comments can be sent to rowsdower@seanbaby.com, and flames should 
be sent to me as well.  I just want to hear from you guys because 
I'm a sad, lonely person.  The fact that I wrote a ballad about
Zap Rowsdower should attest to that.

Eyecatch: Then felt that his dick was firmly pressed against her 
leg.  He looked down and jumped out of the bed. "I'll be down later" 
He said as he dashed into the washroom to clean up.