Disclaimer: Aside from the two main MSTers, Buck and Tyler, I do not
own any character contained within this fanfic (and technically, I’m
only a co-owner of Tyler. I didn’t create the character, but I have
been granted carte blanche by his official creator). They are owned by
their respective companies, be it AIC/Pioneer or Toei/Funimation. Of
course, if I had the ability to pay those companies for use of their
characters, I wouldn’t need this disclaimer.
"No Need for Original Characters!" is the property of Jesse McDade, who
gave me permission to use his work.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
(The scene opens to reveal Buck “The Hustler” Floyd, former
professional wrestler, drinking coffee at a coffee table. Imagine
that. Sitting across from him is Vegeta, Saiyan prince and all-around
badass.)
Vegeta: So, you say you’re a wrestler?
BF: Used to be.
Vegeta: What league were you in?
BF: You’ve probably never heard of it. Wasn’t one of the big ones.
(Loud screaming can be heard from off-screen.)
Vegeta: What’s going on in there?
BF: Oh, that? Washuu-chan is giving Tyler a private screening of “At
the Carrot Patch” in hopes that he’ll stop being such a pervert.
Vegeta: Ick. I’ve worked with that fic before, it’s not pleasant.
(Pause.)
Vegeta: Anyway, what do you think of the current state of the WWF?
BF: The Rock as the World Champion, are you kidding me? The World
Title is supposed to be around the waist of the best wrestler in the
world by definition. And, uh... he is NOT it.
Vegeta: And who do you think is?
BF: Kurt Angle, Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, Lance Storm, Rob van
Dam... personally, I can’t wait until Ken Shamrock comes back.
(Washuu comes into the scene carrying a clipboard. Following behind
her in an almost trance-like state is Tyler... a very pale, very scared
Tyler.)
BF: So how was it?
Tyler: AHH!!!
BF: I guess you didn’t like it, then?
(Tyler mumbles something about the ASPCA.)
BF: Looks like another success, Washuu-chan!
Washuu: Thank you. Well guys, I have some good news and some bad
news.
Vegeta: Let’s hear the good news first.
Washuu: Very well. You’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback from the
first experiment, so you’ll be getting a ship to work out of starting
with this one.
BF: Excellent.
Vegeta: Great. You guys blast off, I’m heading home.
Washuu: Not so fast, Vegeta. You’re forgetting the bad news.
Vegeta: Don’t tell me...
Washuu: That’s right. The bad news applies directly to you. People
responded so well to you, that you’ll be staying on as a regular.
Vegeta (looks at author): You know, you don’t have an original bone in
your body.
(Careful, Vegeta. I have artistic license, don’t make me retool your
character. I can put you in a tutu and make you dance if I wanted to.)
Vegeta: Or you could just leave me alone and keep your head attached
to your body.
(That’s always an option.)
Washuu: Anyway guys... it’s time for you to see your ship. Right this
way.
(Washuu leads the trio of wise guys to a remote section of her
interdimensional lab. There is a man strapped to an examination table
a few feet away from a pedestal. On this pedestal rests a tiny, tiny
ship.)
Vegeta: Is this a joke? Where’s our ship?
Washuu: It’s right there.
Tyler: You’re kidding.
Washuu: Hardly.
Vegeta: Well how are we supposed to get to outer space in that?
BF: Relax, Vegeta. If I know Washuu-chan as well as I think I do...
that thing isn’t designed to take us to outer space.
Washuu: That’s correct, Buck. But what do you think it’s for?
BF: Judging by the size of it, and the guy on the table, we’re taking
a Fantastic Voyage, so to speak... we’re going to Innerspace.
Washuu: Very good. You’re absolutely correct.
BF: Are you impressed?
Washuu: Not particularly.
(Buck looks crestfallen.)
Washuu: But if you tell me who this man on the table is, I probably
will be.
BF: Easy. Since the ship is designed for innerspace travel, this must
be the guy we'll be inside of. And since we are to watch fanfiction,
this guy must have written our next one.
Washuu: Now I'm a little impressed.
Vegeta: I always thought all wrestlers were idiots.
BF: Most are. I should introduce you to my brother sometime.
Washuu: If you three are about ready, we'll begin.
Vegeta: I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
Tyler: Nng.
Washuu: I'll take that as a yes. What about you?
BF: I'm ready to go, but what about the special guest we're supposed
to have?
Washuu: I almost forgot, thank you. Tyler, it's your turn to pick.
(Tyler appears lost in thought for a few moments, then blurts out a
name.)
Tyler: Sasami!
Washuu: That's doable.
(Washuu pushes some buttons on her holo-top and a column of white light
appears amidst the crew. When the light fades, Sasami is standing
there.)
Sasami: Where am I?
Vegeta: Take a guess.
(Sasami looks around.)
Sasami: Oh, hi Washuu!
BF: That's... whoops. Forgot. "Little" is relative. You calling her
Washuu-chan wouldn't make sense.
Tyler: I guess that's why Vegeta doesn't call her that, either.
Vegeta: Gallic Gun!
Washuu: Duck and cover!
(Washuu, Sasami, and Buck dive to the floor. Tyler, however, doesn't
have that luxury. He ends up pulling himself from a new smouldering
hole in the wall.)
Tyler: Maybe you should consider anger management training.
Vegeta: I think I manage it rather well.
Washuu: If you two are quite finished, we should begin the experiment.
Vegeta: Heh heh... Tyler is just about finished.
BF: Gentlemen... Oh, who am I kidding? Guys, shall we?
(Washuu enlarges the ship. Buck, Tyler, and Vegeta step inside while
Sasami waves good-bye.)
Washuu: You're next.
Sasami: You want me to participate?
Washuu: Precisely.
Sasami: Then I think it would have been easier to just come get me
rather than using your portal thingy.
(Sasami crawls into the module. The doors are sealed, and the ship is
miniaturized once again. It is now about the size of an aspirin
tablet. Washuu picks it up and looks toward the camera.)
Washuu: Experiment #MST002: "No Need for Original Characters!" and
"No Need for Similarity!" both by Jesse McDade.
(The crab-haired goddess walks over to the man strapped to the table.)
Washuu: Swallow this please, Mr. McDade.
Jesse: Um... what's going to happen when I do?
Washuu: Well, the ship's navigation system is designed to take its
crew to the part of the brain which is responsible for memory. Once
there, it will trigger a few synapses and the fanfic they are to
witness will be projected for them right there in your little melon.
It's all very complicated, I doubt you'd understand. But it's all in
the name of science!
Jesse: Okay... for science.
(Washuu drops the mini-ship into Jesse's mouth and the camera view
switches to a view from inside the ship.)
Crew: AAAAAAAHHHHH!!!
Washuu (on radio): Don't worry, you'll get used to it.
Sasami: But I'm only here for the one time!
Washuu (on radio): Well then you won't have to put up with it anymore.
It's win-win.
(I have decided to spare you the details and just tell you that the
ship is now in the mind of Jesse McDade. Tyler is writing something on
the back of his hand.)
Sasami: What are you doing?
Tyler: You see those bank statements and credit card numbers out the
right side of the ship? Let's just say I'm going to put them to good
use.
(The ship, apparently having reached its destination, stops its forward
momentum. A nearly-transparent screen rises up in front of the ship's
viewing window upon which an image is projected.)
OK first of all, this is my first fic, it really sucks i know,
Vegeta: That's the most useful warning I've ever seen on a fic.
Tyler: Yep. Nothing like telling us ahead of time that it's going to
suck.
Sasami: Give the poor guy a chance.
BF: Sasami's right, guys. I mean, chances are he only says it sucks
because it is his first.
Voice: I never had that problem.
Vegeta: What was that?
BF: That's our author. He's an egomaniac when it comes to writing
ability and sense of humor, don't pay any attention to him.
so only constructive criticism please,
Tyler: So... first he tells us it sucks, and then he asks for
CONSTRUCTIVE criticism? That doesn't make a lot of sense.
i get enough mail about how i suck as a person,
Sasami: Aww...
i don't need any on how i suck as a fanfic author. second, i do not own
any of these characters, except Keichii, all characters are copyright
of their respective owners, (probably some Japanese name i cant spell)
or what ever.
Vegeta: You know, what ever owns damn near everything. Frankly, I'm
getting sick of him waving his authoritarian power in our faces.
PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE don't sue me!!
Tyler: Please?
BF: Pretty please?
I have no money! Thank you for your cooperation.
*---------------------------------------------*
(This is supposed to take place in the OVA or whatever,
Vegeta: That's it, I want out of here right now.
Sasami: Why?
Vegeta: Because you can tell a fic is going to be bad when even the
narrator doesn't know the plot.
but with some aspects of Tenchi Universe [mainly Washu and Mihoshi
appearing prior to the encounter with Kagato], after Ryoko, Ayeka,
Sasami, and Mihoshi, and Washu have made their debuts, a little while
before Kagato. )
*---------------------------------------------*
Tyler: Oh look, it's over. Let's go.
BF: Actually, it hasn't started yet.
Tyler: Dammit!
BF: Watch it there. You invited a child come with us, so you'd better
keep the gutter mouth in check.
Sasami: I live in the same house as Ryoko. You don't think I've heard
worse?
No Need For Original Characters!
A bright red streak crossed the sky. A loud, high pitched whine
gradually rose in volume,
BF: Then we asked Fran Drescher to leave.
Tyler: Swish!
until it crescendod into a deafening crash and a blinding flash of
light. Several kilometers away Tenchi Masaki wakes with a start, filled
with a sense of dread. He shrugs it off and goes back to sleep...
Vegeta (Tenchi): Eh, just another spaceship crashing in my backyard.
I'll check it out in the morning.
Around 11:00. Tenchi was out working in the fields with Ryo-ohki.
Ryoko was still sleeping, Sasami was busy preparing lunch,
Sasami: Isn't that always the way?
Tyler: Yes, I think we've all had to deal with typecasting at one
point or another.
Mihoshi was watching TV, Ayeka was in her room, doing something,
Tyler: And something had marks all over his body from the whip.
BF: Let's not start with that.
and Washu was in her lab of course. Ryo-ohki started meowing and
looking over to the east, where the fields gave way to the mountains
and forest. A fairly tall, lean figure staggers out of the woods,
stumbles and fall.
Tyler: Boy, Tom Green's really let himself go. I don't think I've
ever seen him THAT drunk.
BF: He's still funny, but not ha-ha funny.
Tenchi doesn't notice as he is facing another direction, and he's is
thinking of the constant fighting that has been going on between the
new arrivals in his house. Ryo-ohki starts tugging at his pant leg, and
he notices the collapsed figure.
"Oh, God..." he says to himself and runs to another suprise
visitor. It appears to be pretty much human, with the obvious exception
of his tail and dark bluish black fur covering his body up to his neck.
Tyler: Saiyan or Ctarl Ctarl?
Vegeta: Don't insult me by comparing my people with this pathetic
creature. If a crash took that much out of him, he's a real weakling.
I mean, even Mihoshi doesn't look that bad after a crash, and she's had
dozens of them by now.
BF: Practice makes perfect, I guess.
The fur is slightly singed, his clothes are torn and burnt, and the
light skin of his face is covered in soot.
Sasami: Santa?
Tyler: You mean Annual Gift Man. This is Japan.
BF: You watch The Simpsons too much, Tyler.
"We gotta get you some help pal."
BF: That's a tad presumptuous. Calling him pal already...
Tenchi said, lifting this stranger on to his back.
Sasami: So he rolled the stranger over?
Vegeta: I think he's trying to carry him.
"Nnnnnnnnnnn..." he moaned as Tenchi ran back towards the house,
Ryo-ohki close behind.
As he enters the house Sasami comes out of the kitchen.
"Tenchi, I just wan...Oh my goodness, what happened?!" she asked as
she saw Tenchi run in.
Vegeta: Running into the house while dragging a nearly unconscious
person behind him. Not bad for a human.
Sasami: Tenchi is Juraian.
BF: But the question is, how much? Vegeta was a lot closer calling
him a human.
Sasami: How do you mean?
BF: Let's look at it this way. Tenchi is not a full-blooded Juraian,
obviously. The author of this fic is working out of the OVA
continuity, so Tenchi cannot be any more than a quarter Juraian.
Tyler: Explain.
BF: Again, look at the continuity. In the OVA, the first purebred
Juraian Tenchi can be traced back to is Azusa. According to the Tenchi
novels based on this continuity, Funaho was a human. That would make
their child, Yosho, half Juraian. Yosho came to Earth chasing Ryoko,
and while there, he married Itsuki, once again a human.
Tyler: With you so far.
BF: Now, that would make Yosho and Itsuki's child, Achika, a quarter
Juraian. This is where it gets a tad complicated. If we assume
Noboyuki to be completely human, that would make Tenchi no more than
one-eighth Juraian.
Sasami: Right.
BF: However, rumor has it that Noboyuki has a little Juraian blood in
him from somewhere. How much is unknown, but that can't possibly be
more than a quarter as he has never displayed any power farther than
art and perversion. This would put Tenchi somewhere between 25 and
12.5 percent Juraian. Yet he can create the Lighthawk Wings, which is
more confusing yet.
Tyler: He's not the only one who can do that.
BF: But he is the only mortal that can do so without the aid of a
Juraian treeship.
Vegeta: That's not so odd. Just look at we Saiyans. It seems like
those with mixed parentage are able to reach Super Saiyan at a much
younger age than purebreds... Trunks, Gohan, Goten...
BF: But there has to be something incredibly strange about Tenchi's
abilities if Washuu-chan had never seen anything like that before.
Sasami: Wow... I'll have to ask Tsunami about that later.
BF: Yes. In the meantime, I'm sure Washuu-chan would appreciate it if
we stopped thinking about that and got back to the fic.
He immediately headed to Washu's lab.
BF: First place I'D go.
Tyler: He wanted to get this new guy healed. He wasn't heading there
purely for Washuu... um, chan.
BF: I think you'll get a handle on the honorative pretty soon.
"Washu, I found him out in the fields, unconscious. Do something!"
"Ok, ok, put him right here Tenchi. Thats it. Now this should take
care of him, he'll just need a day or so to heal,"
Vegeta: Just a day or so? After being worked on by Washuu, I think
he'd need a couple weeks to recuperate.
BF: First of all, it's Washuu-CHAN. Secondly, I'd appreciate it if
you wouldn't insult her like that.
Sasami: You like her, don't you?
(Buck palms his forehead.)
BF: Geez, even the kid knows.
Washu tapped a few keys on the console, and a transparent bubble
surrounded the the strange young man. Satisfied everything was in
order, Tenchi and Washu went to go have lunch.
The next day...
Keichii Jukai sat up and rubbed his eyes.
Vegeta: Has he introduced himself yet?
Tyler: No.
Vegeta: So we're just supposed to know who he is.
BF: When you make a character of your own, you tend to consider him
the most important in the story.
His whole body was damp, and he was extremely sore.
Tyler (Keichii): That's the last time I let Seiryo convince me to have
a drink with him.
He rubbed his head, drying off his hair, causeing it to stand up and
become rather spikey. As he pryed his eyelids open, he found himself in
a strange, dark room, seemingly some laboratory.
BF (Keichii): So help me, if a short kid with a German accent walks in
here, I'm leaving.
"Well I see you finally decided to join us in the land of the
living," an amused female voice said. He spun around to see a woman
with long, spikey, red hair which looked vaguely like a crab, staring
at him.
Vegeta: So he tells us the new character's name before he introduces
himself, yet he takes the time to be all vague about Washuu?
BF: It's bizarre.
Tyler: Yes she is.
(Buck slaps Tyler in the back of the head.)
Tyler: Hey!
"Who are you? Where am I? What happened?
Tyler: Why am I where I am now, whoever you are? Does it have
anything to do with when what happened happened?
BF: You may ask yourself, "How did I get here?"
Vegeta: And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful house."
Tyler: And you may tell yourself, "This is not my beautiful wife!"
Sasami: Huh?
BF: I've got a Talking Heads album you can borrow when we're done
here. That will explain everything.
Sasami: Thanks.
I feel like hell," he asked the woman.
BF: In all fairness, "I feel like hell" is not something you can ask.
To be correct about it, "he asked the woman" should have come before "I
feel like hell."
Vegeta: Thank you, Sergeant Semantics.
"My name is Little Washu,
BF: No! No it isn't! "Little" is merely what she wishes to be
addressed as!
Tyler: Settle down, dude.
BF: Her NAME is not "Little Washu"! Her NAME is Washuu Hakubi!
Sasami: Is he always like this?
Vegeta: Most of the time. I don't want to be around if we ever have
to watch a lemon with Washuu in it.
BF: That's... Oh God, those actually exist?
you are on the planet Earth, which I assume is what you meant. You
don't look like your from here. It seems you had a rather nasty
accident," She smiled and stood up. "Well, you might as well come and
get something to eat. Follow me."
The two exited the lab to find everyone sitting around the table,
haveing dinner. Washu made the introductions.
Tyler (Washuu): The two women beating the hell out of each other are
Ayeka and Ryoko. The little man cowering from the fight over there in
the corner is Tenchi. The guy videotaping the catfight is his father,
Noboyuki. The crying blonde is Mihoshi, the little girl chained to the
stove is Sasami, and the old man acting as if nothing unusual is going
on is Tenchi's grandfather, Katsuhito. Any questions?
Vegeta (Keichii): Yeah. Who's that teal-haired woman who just started
strangling Mihoshi?
Tyler (Washuu): She's not in this continuity, don't worry about it.
BF: Wow. You guys sure fit in a lot of character stereotypes in a
short time.
"This is Tenchi, he is the one who found you, his father Nobuyuki
and grandfather Katsuhito. To his right is Ayeka and her sister Sasami,
Mihoshi, and that is Ryoko. Everyone, this is..." Washu looked at him.
"Uh, oh. My name is Keichii," he said, looking around the room.
"Well Im glad you're okay Keichii. You didn't look very well
yesterday," Tenchi said.
BF: Doesn't look so great now, either.
Sasami: That's mean.
BF: True, though.
"And i'd like to let you know you are welcome to stay here as long as
you like."
Tyler (Tenchi): You'll have to sleep in the yard, though. We're kind
of running out of spare rooms.
Vegeta: It's just as well, Keichii doesn't look housebroken.
"Thank you, I don't really know what to say,"
"Well if you don't mind," Ayeka asked "I was wondering how you
happened to come to Earth?"
Keichii sat down at the table and started to explain.
"I am from a world called Fiojimi. My people were at peace with the
two other sentient races in our solar system. They both lived on the
planet Kyojimi, which was the planet closer to our sun, Jimii.
BF: What a coincidence. Our sun is named Paaj.
Tyler: Jimmy Page... not funny.
BF: Would you rather I said Kaata?
We lived in a magnificent society, filled with scolars, warriors,
philosophers, and artists. The warriors were little more athletes,
competinging in games of honor and skill, seeing as there was no desire
for war between the three races.
Vegeta: Then what good were they?
Sasami: Just because YOU come from a warrior race...
We lived this way for 7000 years, until we were visited by a mysterious
race. They never showed themselves to us, except for a single envoy. He
demanded that we return what was theirs, some kind of key, to unlock a
great power.
BF: I can see where this is going.
Sasami: Unfortunately, so can I.
Tyler: What, did I miss something?
Of course we did not understand what it was they wanted.
Vegeta: You didn't tell me you were from the Jimii system, Tyler.
Tyler: Ha ha, jackass.
After we explained we did not have it, that we had never encountered
any other race other than our own three, the envoy returned to his
ship, to return home we assumed. We were wrong.
Tyler: More proof that when you assume, you...
BF: We all know the joke, Tyler. No need to continue.
He said something about experiencing the wrath of the Jurai Power. The
ship was incredibly powerful, we never stood a chance. Nearly our
entire population was murdered, our homeworlds destoyed by that awesome
ship. Many of us fled, me included.
Vegeta: Coward!
Sasami: Again, just because YOU come from a warrior race...
I do not know how many escaped alive, if any. I did not know where I
would go, until I pass this sun.
Tyler: Ow! Passing a stone is bad enough, but a SUN?
Vegeta: Gives new meaning to the term "burning sensation," doesn't it?
I decided to explore for signs of sentient life, I approached this
planet, Earth. Then I do not remember what happened after. I must have
crashed onto this planet."
"WHAT?! What did you say that race was?" Ayeka screamed.
Mistaking her rage for suprised recognition, Kiechii replied
BF: Mispells his own character's name... that's just sad.
"The Jurai. Have you heard of them?"
"I happen to be the Crown Princess of Jurai!! How dare you accuse
my people of such a thing!?"
"You?!" screamed Keichii, jumping up from the table. "I ought to
kill you right here!"
Tyler: Do it!
"Haha, I like this kid already," laughed Ryoko.
Tyler: Me too!
BF: Calm yourself, AHRLI.
"Hey! Settle down, both of you!! I'm sure we can figure out what
happend, just calm yourselves!!" Tenchi ordered.
"Lord Tenchi, this lecherous young man is claiming my people are
murderers!" Ayeka yelled.
(Tyler pulls a dictionary seemingly from nowhere and reads from it.)
Tyler: lecherous, adj. lewd; lustful
(The dictionary is put away.)
Tyler: I may be just a cameraman who went to community college, but
Ayeka seems to need work on her English vocabulary. Keichii doesn't
seem very lecherous to me.
BF: Maybe she was referring to Noboyuki.
"She killed my people, my whole race!!" retorted Keichii.
Vegeta: Ayeka killed an entire race of people? I've got to meet this
woman.
"Now we don't know that for sure. No one is going to kill anyone
until we straighten this all out.
BF (Katsuhito): Just remember that no matter what the circumstances, I
never allow killing in the house.
I'm sure Ayeka Had nothing to do with the death of your people. So
there is to be absolutley no fighting in this house, is that
understood?" Tenchi asked. Keichii and Ayeka nodded.
"Seeing as Tenchi saved my life, and also is vouching for you, I am
willing to assume I was mistaken about the identity of the ones who
destroyed my home," Keichii told her.
Tyler: Nah. The Juraians can be downright ruthless.
Sasami: Lest you forget...
Tyler: Present compnay excluded.
BF: Unless you count her throwing knives at Ryo-Ohki in Shin.
Sasami: I did WHAT?
"And I'm not only talking about that, Ryoko. You and Ayeka aren't
being very well behaved either."
"Oh, Tenchi, you know I would never do anything to upset you.
Whatever you say," Ryoko said, as she wrapped her arms around his neck.
"Oh yeah?" He didn't look very convinced.
The next couple of days passed fairly uneventfully.
BF: Only one wing of the house was blown up.
Keichii and Ayeka learned to tolerate each other, but just barely. He
and Ryoko seemed to get along great however.
Vegeta: I smell a BAD self-insertion romance coming.
Nobuyuki announced that they were going to the small inn and hot
springs over the weekend. This put everyone in a good mood.
When they got there they were geeted by a small woman who ran the
inn.
Tyler (small woman): Geet! Geet!
BF: Shut up.
"Welcome Nobuyuki, Tenchi, Katsuhito. It's good to see you again.
And I see you've brought some friends along," the little woman said.
Vegeta (small woman): Just don't do the kind of grand scale damage you
did last time you brought these girls with you.
"I'm sure you four strong men can handle the luggage, I'll show
everyone to the rooms."
"Thank you kindly, Akirosawa, it is a pleasure to be here again,"
Katsuhito replied.
As Tenchi set the bags on the floor of the room Ryoko appeared
beside him.
"Come on Tenchi, join me in the hot springs," she tugged at his
arm. "We've got plenty of time to unpack later."
"Oh, I guess so," he said, knowing she would not let up until he
did, and he was looking foward to the relaxation anyway.
BF: Wait wait wait! Since when does Akirosawa allow the men and women
to mingle in the springs?
Sasami: I don't know. She never did when we went there before. Ryoko
still managed, though.
Tyler: And we're thankful for that.
They walked down the halls toward the springs, to be joined by Keichii,
Sasami and Washu. Ryoko scowled at not having a little time with Tenchi
alone, but she didn't say anything. They all spent the remained of the
day in the spring, while Katsuhito and Nobuyuki stayed in and talked
with Akirosama. At the springs everone was splashing each other and
laughing. A good time was had all around. Washu, being the most
brilliant scientific mind in the universe, happened to notice how
Keichii tended to constantly glance at Ryoko. She also noticed the look
on his face everytime Ryoko hung on to Tenchi. She made a mental note
of it...
BF: I think you may be right again, Vegeta.
...Later that evening Washu and Keichii were getting ready for bed.
Keichii was thinking of a scene earlier in the day when Ryoko was
wrapped around Tenchi, rubbing his chest in the spring, and sighed.
Washu turned to him and said, "It's difficult I know, but Ryoko is a
vey difficult person." Shocked at how it seemed Washu knew what he was
thinking of.
"Uh, e,excuse me?" he stuttered.
Tyler (Keichii): Sorry, it was the fermented beans in my breakfast
this morning.
"You like her very much, don't you?" she asked. "You are very
attracted to Ryoko, are you not?"
Tyler: Kinda goes without saying.
BF: That it does. Of course, she's nothing compared to her mother.
Keichii was taken aback once more. "Um, yes, how did you know? Is
it that obvious?"
Vegeta (Washuu): Let's just say that you were holding your towel
without tying it to your waist or gripping it in your hands.
"No, no, don't worry. I am a scientist, it's my job to notice
little things."
Tyler (Washuu): And from what I've seen, it IS a little thing.
BF: Both of you, stop! Not only is there a child present, but that's
Washuu-chan you're warping!
Vegeta (to Tyler): Has he seen The Night Before the Carnival?
Tyler (to Vegeta): Not unedited.
Vegeta (to Tyler): I don't want to be there when he does.
"Oh." He could not think of anything to say at the moment.
"Well I'm sure she will come around eventually. No one knows Ryoko
better than me. After all, you could say I am her mother."
"You? You don't look old enough to be anyones mother, plus I
thought Ryoko was thousands of years old,"
"Hahaha, don't let my cuteness fool you,
Vegeta&Tyler: We don't.
BF: Speak for yourself.
I am over 20,000 years old."
"Oh. Well you dont look a day over 1000," Keichii said stupidly.
They both laughed at the lameness of that, and after talking for a
little while longer, they both fell asleep.
Meanwhile, a distance away...
"Well well, look what we have here, Ryoko, Washu, Princess Ayeka,
Princess Sasami and... Yosho. And what's this? A Jimi'ian, here, not
three months from when I destroyed that system. He must have been in
that ship I shot down a few days ago. How coincidental. Hmmm this keeps
getting more and more interesting,
Tyler: He can't be talking about the fic.
Sasami: I like it. It's about time Ryoko found someone who's not
afraid to admit that they love her... even if it is illogical for her
to fall for a new character.
Tyler: We don't know if that's going to happen or not.
Sasami: I've read enough romance novels and mangas to know what's
coming.
Vegeta: I spotted it first.
I think I will pay them all a visit soon..."
*---------------------------------------------*
Hey, if you actually read this, you are awesome!!
Tyler: Hey, we're awesome. That's the best compliment I've ever
received.
Vegeta: Does this mean it's over?
Washuu (on radio): From what Jesse tells me, there's a second part
included with this.
(The entire crew groans.)
Thank you. If you liked it, I LOVE YOU!! haha.
Vegeta: Did any of us like it?
Tyler: No, thank God.
BF: Up until Keichii started falling for Ryoko, it was all right.
Overall, no.
Sasami: I kinda like it.
Tyler: Well there you go. But how can anyone not love Sasami?
I think I'll end it here, even though it's kinda short, if I feel like
it, or don't but enough people want me too, I'll go on with this.
Tyler: Somebody should have stopped him.
Umm oh if anyone out there thinks its stupid that I added another
character, Keichii, I just thought it would add a little diversity. If
you haven't (I came right out and said it) noticed he is starting fall
for Ryoko, I always thought the story could stand a little change from
everone loves Tenchi.
BF: He has a point.
Vegeta: On the top of his head.
Blah Blah Blah what am I rambbling on about?
Crew: We don't know!
I'll shut up now, dont forget to email me telling me what you thought
of the story so far, or if you just hate me and want me to die and want
to tell me so. Jesse McDade, McFlysucks@aol.com
Jesse McDade (McFlysucks@aol.com)
regular or misc
No Need For A Terrible FanFic Author! - Part 2 : "No Need For
similarity!"
Hmmm.. seems like this all happened in the OVA.
Vegeta: And now even the author doesn't know where it's coming from.
We're doomed.
Ok I don't own any of these character except Keichii, see the
disclaimer on the first fic for the details or whatever.
BF: Relatively easy considering that they're both on the same page.
Please don't sue me. Ok that said, lets move on to the fic!! Oh yeah
this may contain slightly coarse language and mild sex some people may
not like, but if you are over 10 years old, it's nothing you haven't
heard and should not be too traumatized by it. Please I do not want to
offend anyone,
Tyler: A little late for that.
so consider this fair warning.
*---------------------------------------------*
Part 2: No Need For Similarity!
Tenchi, Keichii, Sasami, and Ryo-Ohki were at the springs rather
early. It was a slightly overcast morning and the steam from the hot
spring created a mist the surrounded the area around the inn. Suddenly
Ryoko appeared, completely naked.
Tyler: Yes!
BF: Do we need to show you "At the Carrot Patch" again?
Tyler: I'll be good. Jeez, I always liked those kind of fics. But
having to see what's happening is a little different than just reading
the fic.
"Ahh, Tenchi, I found you," she purred.
"Ryoko, what are you doing out here like that?" Tenchi wailed.
"What's the matter? Don't you like it?" she asked as she fazed
right in front of him. She then grabbed his head and pulled it to her
breast. Sasami giggled and Keichii turned red and turned away.
BF: I knew it! Keichii is a communist! Kinda makes sense when you
think about it... coming from a peaceful planet of scholars,
philosophers, and warriors who don't practice war.
After a brief struggle, Tenchi managed to push Ryoko away.
"Go put some clothes on," he demanded. She didn't go get any
coverings, but she did back off, floating up to a rock to lie down.
Ayeka woke up about an hour later, and after breakfast went to the
springs to see Tenchi. By now Ryoko had come back down off the rock and
the others had just kind of ignored Ryoko's nudity (except Keichii, who
couldn't really help but notice).
Tyler (Tenchi): She does this all the time, Keichii. You get used to
it.
BF: Meanwhile, Keichii is bleeding to death through his nose.
They were all talking and joking around when Ayeka got to the spring.
"What do you think you are doing you filthy devil woman?!" Ayeka
screamed.
Ryoko turned and said, "Well well princess, you finally woke up.
We've all been down here since 8:30." She phased over to Ayeka and
whispered in her ear, "What are you jealous? Haha, don't worry, some
guys like that underdeveloped look."
Vegeta: Yes, the third world can provide many business opportunities,
if you know how to work it properly.
"How dare you! Tenchi would never find you appealing. I've got more
to offer than you anyway, I just choose to exercise some tact,
something you know nothing about you exhibitionist!"
"Is that so? We'll see about that," Ryoko told Ayeka as she pulled
off the princess' bathing suit and phased back several meters. Ayeka's
face first turned ghost white, then bright red. Tenchi muttered "Good
God," and buried his face in his hands.
BF: Yes, God is good, thank you for pointing that out, Tenchi.
Sasami: Didn't this same thing happen the last time we went to the
springs?
He knew what was about to happen. Keichii looked down and laughed while
Sasami said "Oh my."
Sasami: Oh my.
Tyler: Heh... if I saw what Keichii just saw, I'd laugh, too.
Sasami: Please don't insult my sister, Mr. Tyler.
Tyler: I think you'd be used to hearing your sister insulted by now.
Ryoko phased back to Ayeka and laughed. "You're right, that's not
half bad Ayeka," and slapped her bare ass. This caused Keichii and
Sasami to break out laughing.
Vegeta: Yes, homoeroticism is quite funny in its own way.
BF: Well there has to be some reason that yaoi is so popular these
days, and it sure isn't because it's attractive... yuk.
Ayeka spun around, grabbed her bathing suit and slapped Ryoko across
the face, not quite as loudly as the one she had just received. Ryoko
floated back up to her rock.
Ayeka was absolutely livid. "You ill mannered tramp! You will wish
you had never laid eyes on me when I'm through with you!"
Tyler (Ryoko): I wish that every day, princess.
Ryoko kept laughing. "That sounds like an inviting offer, but I'm
spoken for." Ayeka screamed. Several dozen small wooden cylinders
appeared out of thin air, resembling miniature Jurian guardians.
"Ooooohh," Ryoko muttered just before the energy being gathered by
the little logs was discharge. "Aaarrggg!!" As the pain slowly
subsided, the playful tone of Ryoko's voice was lost and she glared at
Ayeka. "Now allow me to live up to my name," she said, "as the demon
caller. I can call forth evil spirits from anything I want..."
BF: Whoa, hold on. He's taking just about all this imagery from
Mihoshi Falls to the Land of Stars. And, um... he's ruining it, too.
Vegeta: You just now noticed?
As she spoke the air above her seemed to thicken, and the fog coalesced
into a large monster.
"Now," Ryoko pointed to Ayeka, "attack!" The demon looked at Ryoko
for a moment, before tossing her into a large rock. She slammed into it
hard enough to leave a faint spider web of cracks in it, then she fell
in to the water.
"Ryoko!" Keichii yelled as he and Tenchi ran over to her. "Are you
all right? What happened?"
Ryoko looked down at her wrist and said, "That's right, I need the
other two gems to control it..."
Sasami: Not true. I was there. She only needs the two on her wrists.
"Well that's a fine detail to overlook!" Tenchi yelled. Just then
Ayeka screamed. The monster knocked her over and flew off over the inn.
Tyler: And in the outhouse.
"Come on!" Keichii called to Tenchi. "It's headed for the other
springs, maybe we can cut it off."
"Right," Tenchi nodded, and the two of them ran in the door. They
went to Tenchi's room to get Tenchi-ken, and then ran on to the spring
on the other side of the inn. As they burst through the door, the demon
rushed toward them. Tenchi closed his eyes, concentrating his ki
through the hilt of his sword.
BF: To be more accurate, he focused his Jurai energy into the sword.
Ki is entirely different, it doesn't need a conductor, only a medium
for the blast to travel through. Vegeta, you know what I'm talking
about.
Vegeta: Definitely.
Above, a blue light flickered, and then solidified into a blade of
energy. Keichii followed suit, forming an energy ball, then he closed
his fist, creating a long orange blade, similar to Ryoko's. They both
charged the demon; Tenchi attacking the underside while Keichii slashed
it's back. The monster swelled, and then exploded, throwing Keichii and
Tenchi into the side of the inn.
Ayeka, Sasami, and a dressed Ryoko ran to them.
"Lord Tenchi! Are you all right?" Ayeka asked.
"Yes, I'm fine," he said. "How about you Keichii?"
"Just a little bruised, that's all."
That evening they returned home, Nobuyuki despondent over the
massive bill to cover all the damage to the inn cause by the demon.
When they got back Washu checked everyone for injuries or any other
ailments contact with the monster may have caused.
"Dammit," Ryoko cursed while she was sitting in the lab being
examined. "I didn't exactly score any points with Tenchi today."
Washu was sitting in front of her computer, monitoring the display.
"Being attacked by a demon doesn't put people in a good mood, Ryoko.
You are lucky he wasn't very upset with you."
"Yeah I guess," she replied, "I wish I could just do something to
show him I'm not a terrible person."
Sasami: Try respecting his privacy and not fighting with Ayeka. If I
know Tenchi, that will really hit home.
"Keichii didn't seem to mind you nearly got him killed. In fact I'd
say he is really falling for you."
"Oh?"
"You haven't noticed the looks at you? Or the way he take your
dishes into the kitchen after dinner and always offers to do your
chores when you start to complain?"
Tyler: Big deal. Sasami does the same thing, would you say that SHE'S
falling for Ryoko?
"Yeah, I thought he was very nice. He's always helping Sasami cook
or Tenchi in the carrot fields."
Tyler: So is Ryo-Ohki, but...
Rest of crew: We get it, Tyler!
Okay Ryoko, it's just something to think about. Your spine was
bruised slightly, but you should be fine. Tell Ayeka to see me when you
leave."
After lunch Ayeka talked Tenchi into taking her to she the
beautiful tree in the pool he had told her about before.
BF: Now hold on... if they've been to the onsen already, Ayeka has
SEEN that tree and shown Tenchi its secret. Something isn't quite
right here.
Ryoko decided to come along to make sure Ayeka didn't try and seduce
Tenchi. On hearing this Keichii asked to come along as well.
Vegeta: Smooth.
It was snowing, but wasn't very cold actually. When they arrived at
the pool Tenchi asked Ayeka what she thought. Ayeka seemed distant
however. "This is Yosho's tree, I know it is. He must still be alive,
Yosho is here."
"Ayeka?" Tenchi asked. He was about to ask how she knew that when
Keichii interrupted him.
"Does anyone feel that?" he asked when Ryoko screamed.
"No! It can't be! Please no," she was looking off into space.
Suddenly she turned back to the others. "Please Tenchi, help me..."
There was a look of desperation on Ryoko's face that no one had seen on
her before.
Tyler (Tenchi, jealously): Why don't you have KEICHII help you?
Vegeta (Ryoko): What?
Tyler (Tenchi): I've seen the way you two look at each other.
Vegeta (Ryoko): Blame the author, not me.
"O,of course," he said.
Then a black hole grew out of the thin air, laced with a light
tracery of green lightning. A tall figure emerged from the hole. He had
white hair and skin, a long robe, and small round glasses.
BF: I knew John Lennon faked his own death.
Tyler: And he became Kagato?
BF: Think about it... Kagato plays the organ on the Souja all the
time, Lennon composed music on piano. And man, did he ever.
"Hello Ryoko," he said in a deep and cultured voice.
"Kagato," she breathed.
"You," Keichii screamed, "You murdering bastard!" He quickly formed
an ki blade and flew to Kagato. Kagato lifted his hand and erected a
transparent green shield. Keichii's sword bounced off the shield, and
Kagato shot an energy ball at him. Keichii managed to get his sword up
just in time to prevent the blast from doing any serious damage, but
the force shattered the sword and hurled Keichii to the ground with
significant force.
"Hmph, foolish boy.
Vegeta: Thank you, Kagato. We've been waiting for somebody to say
that.
Now, Ryoko!" Kagato called. She seemed to slump
forward then straightened out. When her eyes opened the normal cat like
yellow was gone, and was replaced by a red glow.
"R,Ryoko, what's wrong?" Tenchi asked.
Ryoko did not answer but instead launched a volley of energy blasts
towards them.
"Give me the Master Key, boy," Kagato called.
"If you want it you'll have to take it from me," Katsuhito replied
from behind everyone.
"Yosho, so there you are. You look quite a bit older," Kagato said.
BF (Katsuhito): You're not looking so good yourself, John.
Ryoko formed a plasma sword. Yosho drew Tenchi-ken. She attacked him,
but he was able to easily hold her off.
"Ryoko, you must fight Kagato's control. That is not your true
will!" he yelled. Ryoko did not cease. She shot a blast towards Yosho
who deflected it with his shield. "Using a woman to fight your battles?
Coward!"
Tyler: I guess Kagato can run for president now. Lord knows our last
one used a woman to fight his battles.
BF: Maybe, but unlike the Clintons, the man is controlling the woman
in this scenario.
Yosho brought the hilt of his sword down on the back of Ryoko's head
(Buck screams.)
Sasami: What's wrong?
BF: I don't know why, but for some reason I just thought of "Tenchi on
a Plate of Sashimi."
(Rest of crew screams.)
Tyler: That one was even bad to READ.
and sent her plummeting down to earth. Kagato formed an energy sword,
green and longer that Ryoko's as Keichii ran to look after the
unconscious Ryoko even though he appeared to be in considerable pain
himself. Kagato and Yosho attacked each other, neither seemed to have
any trouble, yet Yosho had the slight upper hand.
Tyler: So Yosho gets to bat first.
They fought for several minutes, but it seemed like hours to everyone
present. Finally the battle seemed to be nearing an end, Yosho and
Kagato swung, locking swords, green and blue sparks flying.
"Eeerrrrrraaaaaaahhhhh!!!" Kagato growled.
"Hahaha, getting too much for you Kagato?" Yosho asked through his
clenched teeth. Suddenly the swords hummed, getting louder, until they
both erupted in a bright flash. Kagato opened his, but Yosho was not
there.
Vegeta: Opened his what? His sword?
BF: I think it's his eyes.
He turned round and saw Yosho sitting on the ground, waving his hands.
Then he pointed to the tree Funaho, the Master Key jutting out from the
trunk.
"Hahaha, the Master Key is mine, haha," Kagato laughed, and went to
reach for the sword, but when his white-gloved hand touched the hilt,
it sent a huge shock to Kagato, and then exploded.
Sasami: The master key exploded? Oh no!
Tyler: That can't be good.
The blast threw back Kagato's arm, and his hand was blown right off.
"Aaaahhh," Kagato yelled, as held his wrist, his hand emerging from
his sleeve.
"Trying to take things that don't belong to you?" Yosho asked.
"B,but how?" Kagato demanded.
"The Master Key only recognizes one owner," said Yosho, "and that
is Tenchi."
BF (Kagato): But weren't you just...? Oh, forget it.
"Me?" Tenchi asked.
"Go ahead Tenchi, take it, it is rightfully yours."
Tenchi got up and walked to Funaho. He nervously reached for
Tenchi-ken, grabbed it and pulled it from the bark of the tree.
"So that must mean this boy is of the Jurai Royal Family," Kagato
mused. "Well if you want your precious Ryoko, you'll have to come get
her, hahaha." Another black disk opened up behind Kagato, and Ryoko,
still unconcious, floated up to his hand. Then he backed into the hole,
and dissapeared, the hole closing after him.
"Ryoko!" shouted Tenchi.
"No," Keichii sobbed and closed his eyes, in disbelief, "I let him
get away, and he took Ryoko."
Vegeta (Ayeka, singing): Celebrate good times, come on!
Ayeka was facing Katsuhito, or who she knew now to be Yosho.
"Hello, Ayeka," he said in a different voice, one Ayeka remembered
all too well. It was the voice of the man she was to marry.
"Why Yosho?" Ayeka started crying, "Why didn't you come back? Was
it me? Did you not love me?"
Tyler (Yosho): No, it's just that... oh wait. No, you're right.
Yosho walked up to her and put his hands on her shoulders. She
looked up at him, and for a second she could see him how she had
remembered him, young, loving, and confident.
"No Ayeka, that was not it at all. I knew when I went after Ryoko
to Earth I could never return. I had to stay to make sure Ryoko would
not be freed and cause harm to anyone else.
Sasami: That worked out well, didn't it?
BF: Is this just about over? I don't think I want Sasami learning
sarcasm from us. Just not something I want on my head.
The biggest reason was neither of truly wanted to be wed. You believed
so because you were raised since birth knowing I was to be your
husband. I knew this, so I decided to stay on Earth, and give you a
chance to be happy. I took a wife, and I hoped someday you would also
find someone to be with for the rest of your life." Ayeka buried her
face into Yosho's shoulder and wept. He held her there for a moment for
a moment before pushing her away. "Tenchi is the person you want to be
with.
BF: Ya think?
He is now the Crown Prince of Jurai."
Tenchi and Keichii walked up to them.
"We have to go after Kagato and save Ryoko," Tenchi said. He had a
look of extreme determination on his face Ayeka had never seen before.
Tenchi was expecting Ayeka to respond somewhere along the lines of 'But
Tenchi, why do you want to save that devil-woman? We would all be
better off with out her'
Tyler: We were expecting that, too.
but instead she nodded in agreement.
"Right, but how can we, Ryo-oh was destroyed."
"What about Ryo-ohki? We have to try something," Keichii said.
"Okay," Tenchi said, "Let's talk to Washu, she will be able to help
us."
Ayeka, Tenchi, Yosho and Keichii ran back to the house. They
explained what had happened to everyone. After a brief discussion, they
had made their battle plan. Ayeka, Tenchi, Keichii and Washu were to go
up in Ryo-ohki and try and save Ryoko. Mihoshi also insisted on going,
Ryoko was her friend, and Kagato was one of the most wanted criminals
in the galaxy and she had to arrest him (she had completely forgotten
Ryoko was also one of the Galaxy Police Most Wanted).
BF: As a White Knight of KOME, I must object to that. Mihoshi may be
a little flaky, but she is not forgetful. I think that was a judgment
call on Mihoshi's part. After all, based on that series of events, it
was clear that as a destroyer, the reason she was on the GP hit list in
the first place, she was being controlled by Kagato. Not to mention
that according to "Here Comes Ayeka!", OVA episode 2, the statute of
limitations has gone into effect. This was mentioned several times,
actually.
Sasami: Right. If the rest of the Galaxy Police were like Mihoshi and
actually got to know Ryoko, they'd realize that, too.
Vegeta: If the rest of the Galaxy Police were like Mihoshi, we'd all
be dead.
Everyone was now ready, and they left for Souja.
Meanwhile aboard Souja...
"Well Ryoko your friends certainly are not lacking in courage. Pity
they will all have to die, all to try and save you, Kagato told her.
Ryoko was imprisoned in a large hourglass on the bridge of the Souja.
She could see Ryo-ohki approaching Souja. "Let's see how well they can
handle the power of Souja," Kagato laughed. Ryoko saw a green ball of
energy gather in front of the fore cannon, then divide into six blasts
and discharge. Three had missed Ryo-ohki, two were absorbed by her
shields, but one connected. Ryoko screamed...
"Aaahhh!" Everyone lurched forward as Ryo-ohki yowled.
"Washu, do something!" Tenchi yelled.
Tyler: Huh, this something guy must be a real ladies' man. Ayeka was
doing something at the beginning of part one, and now Washuu-chan is
going to do something.
BF: Don't objectify her like that, Tyler.
Souja was preparing another blast. "Ryo-ohki, evasive maneuvers!"
Washu called from her cushion where she was piloting the ship. Ryo-ohki
started rising, diving, and spinning. The next barrage missed them
completely. "Now, Ryo-ohki, return fire!" Ryo-ohki fired a magenta bean
at Souja, but was deflected by its powerful shields.
Sasami: How powerful would the Souja's shields have to be to deflect a
bean?
Washu growled. "Damn, Ryo-ohki simply isn't powerful enough.
Someone is gonna have to board Ryo-oh and attack Kagato from there,
BF: Whoa whoa whoa... when did the Ryu-Oh come into this? Did the
Souja become the Ryu-Oh all of a sudden? They said that was destroyed.
Tyler: Whatever, it happened. Failed miserably, but it was worth a
shot.
Vegeta: Don't ask questions. Just smile and nod.
that is our only chance," Washu lifted her head and looked around.
"It's quite a risk."
"I'll go," Tenchi said.
"No, I will," Ayeka stepped up. "I is my ship after all,
Vegeta: I is my ship?
Tyler: I am what I am and that's all that I am.
Sasami: The Souja is Ayeka's ship?
(Buck smiles and nods.)
Vegeta: I think the author is referring to the Ryu-Oh.
Tyler: But earlier they said that was destroyed. The author never
once took the time to explain that the core of the Ryu-Oh was merged
with Ryo-Ohki for the time being.
(Buck smiles and nods.)
and I can't bear the thought of putting you in danger."
"No, Lady Ayeka, that is the very reason I must go, I couldn't live
with myself if something happened to any of you. Now I'll go Washu," he
said.
"Right," Washu nodded.
Tenchi was telported on to Ryo-oh. As he took his first step, the
ship was rocked with an explosion somewhere.
Crew: But the Ryu-Oh was destroyed!
On Souja...
Ryoko was watching Tenchi. "Be careful Tenchi, please!" she
screamed.
"Hahaha," Kagato only laughed...
On Ryo-ohki...
"Oh, Please," Ayeka prayed, "Lord Tenchi, do be careful,"
unknowingly echoing Ryoko's own plea. Washu was looking at a display,
and became very worried.
Vegeta (Washuu): Men with umbrellas raining down from the sky? I'm
worried about the mental health of this Magritte guy.
BF: Hey, I happen to like surrealism.
"Oh no, this doesn't look good." She was going through some
statistics when the blood suddenly drained from her face.
BF: What? Washuu-chan is in pain?
Vegeta: She paled, you sad, sad otaku.
BF: Oh.
"Oh no!" she said to herself, then screamed, "TENCHI, GET OUT OF
THERE!"
On Ryo-oh...
Crew: The Ryu-Oh was destroyed!
Tenchi was looking for the control panel Ayeka had told him about,
when a chill ran down his spine. Then, out of nowhere he eard Washu's
scream, "TENCHI, GET OUT OF THERE!"
Sasami: Pretty loud scream to be heard through the hulls of both
Ryo-Ohki and the Ryu-Oh, plus several hundred meters between them.
Tyler: I thought that in space, no one can hear you scream?
(Buck and Vegeta smile and nod.)
He looked up, when Ryo-oh was torn apart by a direct blast from
Soouka's cannon.
Tyler: That's a new one.
On Souja...
"NOOO!!!" Ryoko screamed, "Tenchi!! You bastard!!"
Vegeta (Tenchi): What? What did I do?
she yelled at Kagato, then phased out of the hourglass she had been
kept in to the wreckage of Ryo-oh.
Tyler (Tenchi): You mean to tell me that I risked my life to come save
you when you could have phased out of there at any time?
BF (Ryoko): No, not at any time. Only when it was funny.
He look suprised at that. "Oh, Tenchi," she called. She flew in and out
of the debris, searching for any sign of Tenchi. Her eye caught sight
of something white. She phased over too it, and when she recognized it,
she let out a cry of pain and anger. She grabbed the small peice of
cloth
Vegeta: This guy is relying far too much on the actual storyline.
and phased on to Ryo-ohki.
"Ryoko!" Keichii called, "are you all right? What happened?" She
walked toward the center of the ship.
"Ryoko, we need to go look for Tenchi. Hey, Aren't you coming to
help?" Ayeka snapped at Ryoko. Ayeak ignored her, and ket walking.
Sasami: Ayeak ignored Ayeka?
As she passed Ayeka
Sasami: And now she passed herself.
however, she threw the object she had found out in the wreckage. She
took another step, let out a single sob, and collapsed, weeping into
her hands. Keichii rushed over and put his arms around Ryoko to comfort
her. Ayeka caght the little peice of cloth, and opened up her hand to
look at it.
"Oh, God no," she cried. Keichii looked up to Ayeka to see what was
wrong, and saw her holding the headband Tenchi was wearing, stained
with blood.
"Oh God," he breathed.
Ryoko looked up. "Kagato, you have taken one of the things that is
most precious to me, AND I WILL MAKE YOU PAY!"
BF: Isn't that line taken straight out of the series?
Tyler: An awful lot of them have been already, why not one more?
Vegeta: This fic blurs the lines between originality and blatant
rip-off so much, I don't know anymore.
*---------------------------------------------*
Well this seems like a good place to stop.
Crew: Yay!
Seeing as the events are so similar to what happens on Tenchi Muyo!, I
might as well end where the episode ends. As you can probably tell, my
story is almost exactly the same as the OVA,
Crew: We noticed!
hence the name 'No Need For Similarity!' The only deviations are
(obviously) Keichii, and Washu & Mihoshi appearing before They are
introduced in the original. After the epic battle with Kagato though, I
will try and come up with something original ok? haha (humorless
laughter) Ok please Email me McFlysucks@aol.com with questions,
comments, complaints(most likely), corrections, death threats, love
letters(yeah right), tax forms, random passages from the Bible,
BF: "And Washuu shall smote the wicked in a vain attempt to deter
others from writing fanfics directly from canonical Tenchi" -- D3 7:28
what ever. I am a sad and pathetic person, so any correspondence is
appreiciated. Ok see you next time, Jesse 'Jesse' McDade (haha old
joke...)
Sasami: Joke?
(Buck, Vegeta, and Tyler smile and nod.)
Please, if there is any problem, if I did anything wrong, just tell me
and I'll try and fix it, thank you, Jesse McDade
BF: You did much wrong. Much, much wrong.
Vegeta: And you can't fix it, either. Taking your plot directly from
the series is unforgivable.
Tyler: So it's over finally?
BF: Yes, but... I think that we shall encounter this man again when he
continues the series.
Sasami: Even I'll admit that I don't want to be here for that. He
started off so well, too...
Washuu (on radio): Well guys, it's time to come out.
Tyler: All righty!
(The camera fades, and then comes back in to reveal the MST crew
sitting around a table. Washuu is standing at the head of the table
addressing them. Jesse has been released and sent home.)
Washuu: Well guys... I think you're well on your way to making a name
for yourselves in this medium.
BF: Thank you, Washuu-chan.
Washuu: Sasami, what did you think about this?
Sasami: I actually think it was pretty fun. It was refreshing to be
able to try something new. Now I have to go, dinner isn't going to
cook itself.
(Sasami rises from the table and walks toward the exit of the lab.)
Washuu: You guys can leave, too, if you want.
(Tyler and Vegeta both leave. Buck remains seated.)
Washuu: Something wrong?
BF: Not by a long shot. I just enjoy being in your presence.
Washuu: Obviously. That reminds me, there was something I wanted to
talk to you about.
BF: Yes?
Washuu: I heard your discussion about Tenchi's bloodline. There's
nothing I like better in my guinea pigs than intelligence, and you've
demonstrated that you have that in spades.
(The Hustler is grinning from ear to ear at this point.)
BF: So then... how would you like to go to the art museum this
weekend?
Washuu: I didn't say that I was interested in you romantically.
(Washuu turns to walk away, but then looks over her shoulder at her
more-than-willing test subject.)
Washuu: But remember what I told you last time about getting what you
want.
(The red-headed beauty walks off to another section of her lab. Buck
watches her leave, hair swishing behind her. As soon as she is out of
sight, he stands up and sighs.)
BF: "I do believe you can do anything you set your mind to. So, maybe
someday... you’ll get what you want." That's what she told me. If I
put my mind to it, it's going to happen. I was an icon in the FWA
because I accomplished everything I set my mind to.
(The Hustler smiles faintly at this.)
BF: If that's any indication, then... it's only a matter of time.
(Buck leaves the scene and the camera fades to black.)
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Well, that's it for my second MST. And if you think I can dish it out
but can't take it, read my first one, where I MSTed a fic I wrote
myself. Special thanks go to Jesse McDade for letting me work over his
fic like this. Send C&C to buckfloyd@yahoo.com if you would. Thank
you.
And hey... if you think it's wrong for me to try and set up my main
character with Washuu-chan... at least I'm making him work for it.
Nothing good will come to you without effort.