AnimePort#9 MST. MST#15 The MST of: Tank Cop's "True", and "My Little Baby Cabbit". DISCLAIMER: My following apologies to the following people and/or companies for borrowing and/or creating parodies of their characters, and stories; Rumiko Takahashi, VIZ video, AnimEigo, Pioneer LDC, AIC, U.S. MANGA corps, Kosuke Fujishima, Nintendo, Creatures Inc., GAME FREAK Inc., Best Brains Productions, a bunch of anime companies and writers that I do not know personally, my third grade math teacher, and all others who would be insulted by this MST (Original FanFic writer, optional.). .......................................... Somewhere in the vastness of the multiverse, there is a certain focal point of the worlds. A place where our reality and those of our favorite comic books meet, and are able to cross. At this place was constructed a huge station, technically advanced in ways that surpass even the most futuristic of realities. In this place research is conducted on the fictional stories that are created by the ever adoring fans of the comics. FAN-FICTIONS. One man from our reality, a sponsor of the station, has been given the task of leading the research on the stories, by bringing together the most unique group of people from the anime realms. The place is "AnimePort#9". These are the reviews. . . ________________________________________________________________________ _____________ Technical note: MST'd by the following group of people and/or characters. PETER SUZUKI. PRISS ASAGIRI. RANMA SAOTOME. AYEKA JURAI. RACHEL T. MECHA (RATCHET) Documentation made by the following; B-KO DAITOKUJI. Begin recording of research documentation. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ Cue to Peter's office (Watch for falling property values!), where our MST hero is seated in front of his computer, obviously waiting for something to happen. Ratchet walked in, stepping over soda cans and comic books, making her way over to the fan fiction writer. "Hey Peter, what's up?" asked Ratchet. "Oh, hi Ratchet." Replied Peter, removing his headphones. "I'm just downloading a 'Download Accelerator' for my computer." "How's it coming along?" asked Ratchet, seating herself on Peter's cot. "It's taking forever." Said Peter, turning around to face the female android. "Bad news?" "Yep." Said Ratchet, pulling a letter from between her cleavage. "The sponsors sent this message over the E-mail system. It's in code." Peter looked at the message, noting the near incomprehensible series of symbols and shapes.. "Digimon code. They're trying to stall for time. Luckily my D-Terminal can handle the job. Now let's see . . ." Peter rummages through his jacket, looking for the object in question. "Ah-HA! Found it." "OOH! What does it say!? What does it say!?" asked Ratchet, bouncing in anticipation. "Logging in . . . Checking symbols . . ." Peter's eyes suddenly went wide. "My God! "What? What's wrong?" asked Ratchet, getting concerned. "Send the rally call!" said Peter, getting his stuff together. "Emergency meeting, code Orange!" Knowing that code Orange meant "ASAP", Ratchet rushed off to inform the other MST group members. As the dust and debris cleared, Peter could only look at the letter, and shudder. Ten minutes later . . . "Tank Cop?!?!?" exclaimed Ayeka. "Didn't that GenSao guy install something to keep him from posting, again?" asked Ranma. "The content/spelling filter whatchamacallit?" "THESE fics apparently were sent before the filter was installed." Said B-ko, typing up information on her laptop. "We practically missed them completely." "Did Ksa get them?" asked Priss. "You know he did some TC fics that we didn't do." "I checked, and as far as I know he missed them." Replied B-ko. "That means WE need to do them." "The theater's already set up." Said Peter. "The trouble is, I don't know how bad these are going to be." "These are Tank Cop fics, remember?" said Ratchet, getting a couple extra boxes of vomit bags. "They're going to be bad." Suddenly the signal to start, blared. *NO-NO-NO!! DEAD BROAD _OFF_ THE TABLE!!!* "WE GOT TANK COP SIGN!!!!!" shouted the MST group members as they ran into the theater, and B-ko dashed into the control booth. Let the games begin. ======================================================= (The MST group enters the theater, taking their usual seats. From left to right: Ayeka, Ranma, Priss, Peter, and Ratchet, got it? Good.) PETER: Over lips, and onto toes; get out the barf bags, 'cause HERE WE GO! >This is a very special short fic I very much enjoyed making. AYEKA(grumbling): Yeah, I am sure you did. > >by Tank Cop RANMA(to Tank Cop): May you fall into the "Spring of Drowned Potato Bug"! PRISS(sarcastic): Oh THIS should be fun. > >True AYEKA: False. PRISS: Maybe. RANMA: I don't know. PETER: What was the question? RATCHET: Is that your final answer? > >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >------------------------- PRISS: Behold the line of good taste we're crossing. >(Scene beins AYEKA: By spelling "begins" wrong. >with Kiyne RANMA: Who? >on her couch in her apartment, watching tv, and >drinking saki) >The phone rings and Kiyone picks it up. >Kiyone: Hello? RATCHET(Kiyone): Really? You don't say . . . You don't say . . . You don't say! . . . Bye! (Mimes hanging up a phone.) ALL BUT RATCHET: Who was it? RATCHET(Kiyone): He didn't say! >(Scene changes to the Maskia house, RANMA: What's the "Maskia" house? >where Ryoko is sitting on a couch) AYEKA(Ryoko): Wait just a minute . . . I am in the wrong house!!! >Ryoko: Hey waz up Kiyone? PETER: Japanese ebonics; the latest trend in fan fiction. >(Scene changes back to Kiyone) RATCHET: Woah! The scene's a shape shifter!! >Kiyone: Nothing just sitting here watching some tv, having some saki. >Waz up with you? PRISS(Martin Lawrence): WAZAAP!! >(Scene changes back to Ryoko) (Peter makes the old Autobot/Decepticon transformation noise.) >Ryoko: Nothing watching tv, having some saki. AYEKA: More like draining out the entire supply of Japan. >(Scene changes to Kiyone) RANMA: Is this a magic show, or something? >Kiyone: True, true. >Just then Mihoshi walks into the apartment. >Mihosh: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! >Kiyone: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! PRISS: You're in the same room, stupid!! >(Scene changes to Ryoko) PETER(Digimon): Scenemon digivolve to . . . >Ryoko: Hey, is that Mihoshi? RATCHET(Kiyone): No, it's a "Baywatch" extra! >(Scene changes to Mihoshi and Kiyone) RANMA: It's dividing! >Kiyone: Hey Mihoshi pick up the phone. >Mihoshi picks up the phone. AYEKA(deadpan): Intense, poorly detailed, action. >Mihoshi: Hello? PETER(singing): Hellooooooo . . . PRISS(singing): Hellooooo . . . RANMA(singing): Hellooo . . . >(Scene changes to Ryoko) RATCHET("Beast Machines" transformer): I am TRANSFORMED!! >Ryoko: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! AYEKA: The opposite of down. >(Scene changes to Mihoshi and Kiyone) PRISS: You're going to break it, if you keep changing it back and forth like that! >Mihoshi: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! RANMA: The ceiling. >Kiyone: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! >(Scene changes to Mihoshi) RATCHET: Honey FLASH!! >Mihoshi: Hey where's Sasami? PETER: Stuck in another Tank Cop fic, probably. >(Scene changes to Ryoko) >Ryoko: Hey Sasami. >(Scene changes to Sasami in the kitchen making dinner) >Sasami: What is it Ryoko? >(Scene changes to Ryoko) PRISS(Ryoko): Tell the author to stop changing the scene all the time! I'm getting motion sickness! >Ryoko: Picks up the phone. AYEKA(announcer): Ryoko IS, Popeye the Sailor. >(Scene changes to Sasami) RANMA(Power Ranger): It's morphing time! >Sasami picks the phone up. >Sasami: Hello? RATCHET(scary voice on phone): I know what you did, last summer! >(Scene changes to Mihoshi) >Mihoshi: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! PRISS: Your cholesterol level. >(Scene changes to Sasami) >Sasami: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! PETER(looking up): The rafters, a couple of boom mikes, and a tanker of ice water in case I get out of hand. >(Scene changes to Ryoko) >Ryoko: AAAAAAAAAA! AYEKA(Ryoko as the Wicked Witch of the West): I AM MEALTING!!! I AM MEALTING!!! WHAT A WORLD!!! WHAT A WORLD!!! ALL MY BEAUTIFUL WICKEDNESS!!! >(Scene changes to Kiyone) >Kiyone: AAAAAAAAAA! PRISS(Kiyone, burned): DAMNIT THAT'S HOT!! >(Scene changes to Sasami) RATCHET(eyes spinning around like slot machine tumblers): I'm getting dizzy from all these scene changes. Ooooh . . . >Sasami: AAAAAAAAAA! PETER: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY MACERENA! OTHERS: AH-HAH! >Just then a littel intercom in the kitchen starts to beep. >Sasami: Hold on. >Sasami tapes the intercom on. >Sasami: Hello? AYEKA(intercom, as Carl the doorman): Hi, this is Carl, your doorman. >(Scene changes to Washu's lab) >Washu: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! PRISS(Sasami): NOTHIIIIIIIIING! >(Scene changes to Ryoko) >Ryoko: AAAAAAAAAA! (Close up of Ranma, with a black background.) RANMA(screaming): AAAAAAAAAA! >(Scene changes to Kiyone) >Kiyone: AAAAAAAAAA! (Close up of Peter and Ratchet, with a black background.) PETER & RATCHET(screaming): AAAAAAAAAA! >(Scene changes to Sasami) >Sasami: AAAAAAAAAA! AYEKA: BBBBBBBBBB! PRISS: CCCCCCCCCC! >(Scene changes to Mihoshi) >Mihoshi: AAAAAAAAAA! RANMA(Fonzie, giving the thumbs-up sign): AAAAAAAAAAY! >(Scene changes to Washu) >Washu: AAAAAAAAAA! PRISS(al-la Spike Jones): TURN THE PAGE, YOU FAT HEAD!!!! >The Sasami and Mihoshi hang ther phones up RATCHET: Which they wouldn't have to have done, if they would have just gotten a better phone plan. >. >(Scene changes to Kiyone) >Kiyone: So waz up Ryoko? PETER: You think they would've told us, by now! >(Scene changes to Ryoko) AYEKA(Ryoko): The author is TYPING his "s"'s backwards. >Ryoko: Just watching tv, having some saki. RATCHET: And your point is? PRISS(Tank Cop): Duh, there had to be a point? >(The scene goes all black except for a picture of Ryo-Ohki looking >drunk holding a jug of saki and a carrot, >you hear Kiyone's voice in the back ground) PETER(through "Mr. Bullhorn"): THIS IS TEXT!!!!!!! >Kiyone (voice only): True, true. >The End RANMA: Of what? Nothing happened. >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >--------------------- >Yes I did rip off the Waz Up thing from the beer comceral, AYEKA: Trust us; they will NOT care. >but who has not? PETER: The Pope, our current President of the United States, and Al Bundy. RANMA: You sure about that, Peter? PETER: Pretty sure. I never did see that final episode. >Well until next time. PRISS: We'll be hanging on to every moment, like a treasure. >Tank Cop RATCHET: MAY THE HORNED DEMON OF IXPAH SMITE YOU LIKE THE LAST SIX, AND YOUR ADULT DIAPERS NOT BE LEAK RESISTANT!!! (Everyone else stares nervously at her.) What? >^_~ ALL(old geezer): EVIL! (The MST group exits the theater.) ======================================================= Cue to the lounge, where Priss is attempting to come up with new lyrics for her latest song. "I want do see you die? No, already did that one. Dry up and fry? No; too obscure." Suddenly, her cellular phone rang. "It's your dime. What do you want?" asked Priss, as she answered her phone. "WAZZZZZ UPPPPP!" replied the voice on the phone. "Hello?" asked Priss. "Who is this?" "WAZZZZZ UPPPPP!" repeated the voice. "Stupid prank callers." Muttered Priss. "Let's see . . . star, six, nine, ten, ten, three-two-one." "Here, Ranma. It's for you." Said the voice. "Hello?" asked Ranma over the phone, as Priss pressed the 'Destroy opposing phone' code. *BA-BOOM!!!* "You know, I think I feel a little . . . guilty about blowing up someone, just because of a prank." Said Priss, as she put away her phone. "There, the feeling's passed." "Okay, everyone." Said Peter. "Time to MST that other fic! . . . Hey, where is everyone else?" "Ayeka's finishing up in the bathroom, B-ko's in the control booth, and I have no clue where Ranma and Ratchet are." "Right here!" said Ratchet, as she skipped onto the lounge. A badly burned Ranma, not too far behind. "Ayeka said she would be here, in a moment. Something about 'more cold-cream', or something like that." "What happened to Ranma?" asked Peter, looking at the twitching young man. "W-wrong . . . number . . ." replied Ranma. "Someone called for him, on the phone." Replied Ratchet. Just then, the signal to start, blared. *It's the theme from Spy HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Please note, that while this is going on, the MST group has already rushed into the theater.) AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA- *BA-BOOM!!!** ======================================================= (The MST group enters the theater, and takes up their usual positions.) AYEKA: I hope this will not be too painful. RANMA(still charred): You and me both. >This is one of my most oddest fics I have yet made, PETER: Coming from Tank Cop, this is a bad thing. PRISS: Feeling of dread . . . Feeling of dread . . . Feeling of dread . . . >but I feel like >doing it. So you the fans be my judge. RATCHET(to Tank Cop): You have no fans, will we do? > >Time Note: This takes place after Ryo-Ohki is blamed for breaking >Yosho's statue, in the "Tenchi in Tokyo, Moon Mission" episode. PRISS: Knowing Tank Crap, this could go anywhere. AYEKA: And it probably will. > >by Tank Cop PETER(to Tank Cop): MAY YOUR BUNIONS SPROUT ONIONS!!! > >My Little Baby Cabbit AYEKA: THIS is going to be bad. I just know it. >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >---- RANMA: Cut here, and remove bottom portion . . . >Ryo-Ohki runs from the Makia house in tears PETER: And the first character tries to flee the fic. ALL(to Ryo-Ohki): RUN, CABBIT!! RUN!! >and cries as she runs into >the deep forest. She jumps from log to log, from bush to bush, from >tree to tree PETER(singing): From coast to coast, to make you smile! . . . AYEKA: Peter, they are not going to bring Bob Saget back. Just accept it, and move on. PETER(weeping): But I liked his jokes so much . . . >. Running farther and farther away from home. > >The poor Cabbit could hardly bare RATCHET: because she was covered with fur. >the fact that she was hated by >everyone. RANMA: So, in this fic Sasami is everyone? >She soon finds a small cave where she takes refuge in RATCHET: unintentionally awaking OAV Ryoko. PRISS(Ryoko): Aren't you supposed to be in the lake? >. She then lies herself down, shacking AYEKA: And how exactly does one "shack"? RATCHET: It's a "Shack" Attack! AYEKA: Um . . . No. >and cold as she cries herself to sleep. PETER: The End! OTHERS: You wish . . . >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >----- >At the house the entire family, now aware of the mistake they made, >goes looking for Ryo-Ohki. PETER: Well, Sasami is now aware of the mistake that Ryoko and Ayeka made, but still . . . > >"Ryo-Ohki where are you?" Sasami yells AYEKA: without the use of exclamation marks. >. "Ryo-Ohki, where sorry, RATCHET: I don't know, you had it last. *BA-DA-BUMP!* >please come back." Aeka says. "Come on out Ryo-Ohki, its to late and >cold to be playing games like this." Ryoko says. AYEKA(Ryoko): And bring back my other "o" while you are at it. > >The family looks for the lost Cabbit with no luck of finding her. Aeka >holds her little sister tight in her arms as Sasami cries for her lost >pet and friend. "Oh Ryo-Ohki where are you? Boo Hoo." Sasami said >with tears in her eyes. PETER: Well the acting level is about Tank Cop quality, but we haven't reached a disgusting lemon scene, yet. RANMA: Yet. >"Come on Sasami, its late and getting very >cold. We will look for Ryo-Ohki tomorrow, I promise." Aeka tells her >sobbing sister. PRISS: Oh sure! Leave the cabbit out in below zero temperatures, all night! I'm sure her fur coat will protect her! If not, we'll find her thawing corpse by tomorrow morning! AYEKA(to Priss): Could you have possibly said anything MORE sarcastic? > >They all go back into the house and get some rest. So they can get up >early to look for Ryo-Ohki. RATCHET(singing): Go monkey, go! Mojo Jojo! ALL: GET OUT OF HERE!!! >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >-------- >Ryo-Ohki wakes to up to find herself PETER: sleeping on a Plate of Sashimi. >in a completely different place >then she was yesterday. She yawned only to have something fall out of >her mouth. RATCHET(shrieking): SCURVY!! AYEKA: No, she can not have scurvy. Carrots are too high in vitamin C. >It was a pacifier! SHe then felt something on her head, RANMA: An extra capitalized letter? >she then took it off to see that it was a bonnet! PETER: A bonnie bonnet, to be sure! PRISS: No. >She then looked >around and saw bars all around her. PRISS(singing): The cabbit turned 21 in prison, doing life without parole! >She thought for a moment that she >was in a cage. She then looked up to see there was no top to this >cage. PETER: Then it's a cubicle! AYEKA: Or an apartment complex protection gate. >Then looking around again and released she was not in a cage, >but a crib! She took a closer look at her surroundings. PRISS(Ryo-Ohki): A blanket, bottle, card for a lawyer agency . . . MY GOD! I'm an English baby! OTHERS: PRISS!! PRISS: What? >She was in >what appeared to be a little girl's room, there where stuffed animals, >dolls, and little girl clothes all over the floor. Ryo-Ohki then >stands up AYEKA: On four feet, of course. >and decides to try and escape, but as she moves she hears a >crunching sound and feels something in-between her waist. RATCHET(Ryo-Ohki as Grandpa Simpson): Stupid plastic underwear. >She looks down to see she is wearing a diaper! RANMA: Woah! Ratchet was right! RATCHET(blinking): I wish I wasn't. >Ryo-Ohki blushes all over! AYEKA: Mind you that we could not tell this, because she is covered in fur, but you know me. I do not like to nit-pick. OTHERS: Sure Ayeka, sure. >She >then moved to the side of the crib and tries to get out, but its to >high. PRISS(to Ryo-Ohki): Hey, here's a thought! Squeeze out through the bars! You're a small cabbit, remember!? >Ryo-Ohki tries to jump over, but the diaper she was wearing made >jumming very hard, AYEKA: And what exactly is "jumming"? >and made her move slow, and unsteadly. So Ryo-Ohki >only managed to get to her paws to touch the top of the crib before >falling down on her diapered butt! Ryo-Ohki was so unhappy with how >things where that she started to cry. RATCHET(Ryo-Ohki, crying): I want outta this fic! WHAAAAH! > >Just then a little girl in a blue dress comes into the room. PETER: She was followed by a large man, with an even larger sword. AYEKA: Okay, Peter! Let us just stop that thought, right there! The last thing we need right now is a Darkstalkers cross over. >"What's the matter? Baby hungry?" PRISS(mockingly): Is the little baby gonna cry? >The little girl picks up Ryo-Ohki and holds >her in her arms, like a mother would hold her baby. "My name is Nilly AYEKA(Nilly): and I am stuck in a Tank Cop fic. OTHERS: Hi, Nilly. >. >I live in America, but my parents have to come to Japan once a month >for business, and i have to go with them. PRISS(Nilly): My hobbies include biking, skiing, and kidnapping small animal mascots from Anime series, to dress them up like babies. >Your a funny looking bunny. PETER(Ryo-Ohki): What? Is it showing? >My mommy and daddy told me I could keep you. So now your my baby and I >am your mommy!" Nilly said with a smile. RANMA: So her parents allow her to adopt strange, meowing rabbits? >Nilly seemed a sweet girl, >age 5 or 6 from what Ryo-Ohki could guess. RATCHET: She seemed also be described in incomplete sentences. AYEKA: Rachel, please refrain from doing that. My head hurts enough as it is. >All though Ryo-Ohki was not >ok with the being her baby thing PETER: she enjoyed it anyway. AYEKA & PRISS: PETER!! PETER: What? >. >"Here mommy will feed you now. Baby must be hungry." Nilly takes a >baby bottle full of milk and sticks it into Ryo-Ohki's mouth! Ryo-Ohki >once again was blushing. She found being bottle feed to be very >embarrassing, AYEKA: But what about being bottle "fed"? >but she was thirsty and the milk did taste good. > >After Ryo-Ohki drank all the milk, Nilly takes Ryo-Ohki over her >sholder and pats her back until she burps! "Burp!" PETER: See! She burped! Want to see it again? >Ryo-Ohki goes with >a red face. PRISS: Which we can't really tell, since she's covered with fur, of course. >After Nilly started to play with Ryo-Ohki, bouncing her on her knee. RANMA: Wouldn't she be getting motion sick, since she was just fed? >They where both having a good time. It was so much fun that >Ryo-Ohki even lost control of her bowles, and wet her diaper! ALL: EEEW! PRISS(game show contestant): I'd like to buy a "bowel". RATCHET: Big Fat Baby, eat your heart out. >Ryo-Ohki >was so ashmed and embarrassed of what she did that she started to cry. ALL(Ryo-Ohki as Lucy): WAAAAAH! >Nilly carried Ryo-Ohki over to a changing table. Shhh its ok baby, >theres no need to cry, mommy will change your diaper." AYEKA: But apparently leave out the beginning quotation mark, in the process. >Nilly lies PETER & RATCHET: LIAR-LIAR, PANTS ON FIRE! . . . (They stare nervously at each other for a few seconds, shrug, and then go back to watching the story.) >Ryo- >Ohki on the table and removes her wet diaper and puts it in the trash. >She then takes some talcom powder and powders Ryo-Ohki's crouch RANMA: Did she powder her kneel, too? >and >butt. She then rubs some baby oil over her crouch and butt. AYEKA: She then spent the next thirty minutes washing the fur now stuck on her hands. PRISS(to Ayeka): How would you know? AYEKA: Do not ask. You do not want to know. >Ryo-Ohki >purred as Nilly rubbed her fingers over her oiled pussy and bottom. >She creased and rubbed over Ryo-Ohki's most sensititve spot for a few >minutes. PRISS(turning green): THAT is not good. >Nilly then goes to get a fresh diaper, lifts up Ryo-Ohki's >legs and slides the diaper under her butt. RATCHET: Can someone please tell me, why she just molested Ryo-Ohki? PETER: Because Tank Cop is writing this. RATCHET: Oh. Thanks for telling me. >She then floods it ALL: Again!? >over her >waist and crouch, and tapes the sides up nice and tight. She then >picks up Ryo-Ohki and puts her in her arms and sings and rocks Ryo-Ohki >back and forth, until Ryo-Ohki falls asleep in her arms. PRISS: Translation; She passed out from boredom. > >That night as Nilly was sleeping in her bed Ryo-Ohki took the chance to >escape. (Priss starts humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.) >She tried to jump over again, but failed. Then she looked >around the crib to find something to help her get out. PETER: Try transforming into a space ship. >She found some >reading blocks and started to stack them, until they where high enough. AYEKA: Oh? And "were" are they high enough? >Ryo-Ohki then got on top of them and stretched her little arms over >tothe top of the crib and managed to pull herself out. RATCHET(Ryo-Ohki): I'm over the fence, man! I'm outta here! RANMA: Couldn't she have just crawled out between the crib bars? I mean, they can't be THAT narrow, can they? >She then moves >out of the house as quicl as she could with diapers on. RANMA: What's "quicl"? >As Ryo-Ohki >walks out of the house she can hear the sound of Nilly crying. PRISS(Nilly): I didn't even get a chance to stick this one in the Microwave! WAAAH! >Ryo- >Ohki walks back into the house and to the door way of Nilly's room and >sees her crying her sad eyes out. RATCHET(Nilly): WAAAAH! *poit!* *poit!*(Eyes pop out of her head, and into her lap.) WAAAAH! PETER(sticking one of Ratchet's eyes back in her head): Feel better, now? RATCHET(putting back her other eye): Yes, thank you. >Ryo-Ohki then made a hard dection. RANMA: Adobe or cement? And what's a "dection"? AYEKA: That is supposed to be "decision", and what the hell are you talking about? >She walks over to Nilly and goes >"Meow" behind her. RANMA(Nilly): C-C-C-C-C-CAAAAAAAAAT!!! >Nilly then looks back to see her little baby. "OH >your back, your really back!" AYEKA: And her really front, too. >Nilly yells as she picks up Ryo-Ohki and >hugs her tight. PRISS(Ryo-Ohki): *CRUNCH!* >"Well I will just stay here for a while, its alot >better then being cold and hungry in the woods." Ryo-Ohki thought. PETER: And being cold and hungry in the woods, is a lot better than being in a Tank Cop fic. What's your point? > >The next day Ryo-Ohki went though more bottle feeding, and baby food >eating as well. She also endured the diaper changing too. RATCHET: But she drew the line at watching "Barney & Friends". >Everything >was going great until later on that day at dinner time. (Dramatic organ music starts playing in the background.) > >At dinner Nilly's family was having carrots as a side dish. Ryo-Ohki >could smell them and of course escaped her crib to try and get some. RANMA(Ash from "Evil Dead"): Come get some! >Ryo-Ohki was able to get under the table and could smell the sweet >carrots that where above her. She then took the table cloth and >started to pull on it hopping to pull down a carrot or two. Instead >Ryo-Ohki pulled down the entire dinner came crashing down on the floor. AYEKA: A conjunction would have been nice, somewhere in that sentence. PETER(narrator): For those of you who don't believe that there was a crash, we give you this sound effect. >*CRASH* PETER(narrator): We now return you to your regularly scheduled crap- fic, already in progress. >Then Nilly's Family looked down to see Ryo-Ohki staring back >at them. ALL: DUNT-DUNT-DUNNN! >Nilly then takes Ryo-Ohki back into her room. "Now look what >you did you bad baby. My mommy and daddy are mad at me now. I will >have to punish you!" PRISS(dark voice): ALL MUST BE PUNISHED!!! RATCHET(Nilly as Sailor Moon): In the name of the moon, I shall punish you! >Nilly then sits on her little rocking chair and >puts Ryo-Ohki over her lap. She then takes the back of Ryo-Ohki's >dipaer down exposing her bare bottom to the world. PETER: What's Dio's Stand doing there!? (Everyone stares at Peter, nervously.) What? >Nilly then raise >her hand and spanks Ryo-Ohki hard! PRISS(Director): Cue unnecessary spanking noise! >*SPANK* AYEKA: *sigh* What is with Tank Cop, and spanking? We see this in almost every lemon he has done. PETER: I think Tank Cop was spanked a lot as a kid, and was traumatized by it, causing him to turn to writing fan fics. OTHERS: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . AYEKA: That . . . is very possible. PRISS: He wasn't spanked hard enough, in my opinion. He's still writing this crap. >Ryo-Ohki jumps in pain, >but is held down by Nilly. "You bad, bad baby!" Nilly yells as five >more hard swats hit Ryo-Ohki's defensless butt. ALL: *SPANK-SPANK-SPANK-SPANK-SPANK!* >Poor Ryo-Ohki just >cries out in pain as Nilly keeps spanking her now very red and sore >bottom. RANMA: Does T.C. even know that Ryo-oh-ki is covered in hair? >After a while Ryo-Ohki start to get a weried feeling in her >pussy, as it starts to get wet. (The MST group all get "weried" feelings in their stomachs, as they read that line, realizing a lemon scene was about to begin.) ALL(turning green): *URP* >Nilly then moved from hand spanking to >using a wooden hairbrush! AYEKA: Notice the exclamation point, signaling that we are officially in Hell. >With made the spankings stink like crazy RATCHET: Looks like she lost control of her "bowles" again. PRISS: The only thing beginning to stink like crazy, is this fic! >and >made Ryo-Ohki cry even more loud. But as the heat in her ass was >building, so the heat in her pussy. RANMA(singing): Burn baby, burn . . . PRISS(Ryo-Ohki, bursting into flames): *FOOM!* AYEKA(Nilly): AIIEEEEE!!! PETER & RATCHET: The End. >Ryo-Ohki then rubbed her hips against the softness of the diaper, RANMA: Wait, didn't Nilly pull it down? >rubbing her pussy and clint PETER: Mr. Buttons and Eastwood? (Everyone, including the characters in the fan fic, stare at Peter, nervously.) What? >over the diaper, bringing her closer to a >climax. Nilly gives Ryo_ohki tem more good hard swats with the brush, >Ryo-Ohki cums full force at the last swat. (The MST group vomits full force, at the last swat.) ALL(throwing up, into barf bags): *HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUULGH!!!* >As Both the pleasure of >cumming and the pain of the spanking hits her at once. ALL: . . . . . . . . . . . Well? What? >Ryo-Ohki then >lies tired on Nilly's lap, as Nilly rubs her hands over Ryo-Ohki's >fiery bottom, saying how sorry she is. PRISS(wiping some vomit off of her mouth): Well you should be! > >Later on that day after Ryo-Ohki was again given a fresh diaper, >Nilly's parents talked to her and told her that Ryo-Ohki was to >dangerous to keep, PETER: Because she pulled down a few plates? Excuse me, but I own a cat; if something doesn't get knocked over at least once a week, there's something wrong with it. >that she could break more of there things, and that >she should be set free to the woods RANMA: Nilly or the cabbit? >where she found her. Ryo-Ohki >could hear poor Nilly cry as she walked in and told Ryo-Ohki. "My >mommy and daddy, say your no good, AYEKA(Ryo-Ohki): What about it? >and I have to set you free. They >promised to buy me a new bunny, but I don't want a new one, I want to >keep you." Nilly picks up Ryo-Ohki and carry's her out side, where AYEKA: Tank Cop inserts a space in a middle of a word, he did not have to. >Nilly's parent's where waiting. RANMA: "Where waiting"? PETER(as I-gore, pointing at Nilly's Parents): There! There waiting! *BA-DA-BUMP!* >Nilly then gives Ryo-Ohki one last hug >and kiss then puts her on the ground and lets Ryo-Ohki run into the >forest. As Ryo-Ohki leaves the area of Nilly's home, she can hear >Nilly's cries growing less and less. Ryo-Ohki started to cry too. PRISS: Boo Hoo. >She >will miss Nilly, but knows she needs to get back to her own home PETER: conveniently forgetting the reason why she left it, at the beginning of the fic. >. > >It was late when Ryo-Ohki found her way back to the Maskia house. PETER(reaching into his jacket): This looks like a job for . . . (Pulls out his megaphone.) MR. BULLHORN! OTHERS(bored): Yaaay. PETER(through megaphone): THAT'S "MASAKI"!!!!!!! MA-SA-KI!!!!!!! THERE IS NO "A" AT THE END!!!!!!! THE "A" BELONGS AFTER THE "S"!!!!!!! >AS she approached the house AYEKA: Tank Cop capitalizes the word "as" for no reason. >she heard cries coming from inside, it was >Sasami. Ryo-Ohki ran in and finds Aeka comforting her sad sister. "Is >ok Sasami, we will find Ryo-Ohki no matter what it takes." Aeka said >as she crossed her sister's hair and rubbed her head. AYEKA: Why would I cross her hair? RANMA: Why would you rub her head? PRISS: Why should we even care? >Ryo-Ohki then walks in front of them and goes "Meow". PETER & RATCHET(singing): Meow-meow-meow-meow! Meow-meow-meow-meow! Meow-meow-meow-meow, meow-meow-meow-meow! . . . RANMA(shaking and sweating): DON'T SING THAT!!! >Both of them stare at the happy little cabbit. PRISS(Aeka): Damn! She's still alive. AYEKA: HEY! >Sasami rushes to pick her up. "Oh Ryo-Ohki your >back RATCHET(Sasami): and your front, too! >. Oh I missed you so much. Where all sorry we where so mean to >you! AYEKA(Sasami): Where also sorry we keep replacing the word "we're" with "where"! >" Sasami hugged Ryo-Ohki until she felt something? RANMA: Well, did she? >She looked at >Ryo-Ohki again, and saw something very surprising. PETER(Sasami): I didn't know you could grow a beard! >"Ryo-Ohki, why do you have a diaper on?" Sasami asks. PRISS(Ryo-Ohki): Medical reasons. >Ryo-Ohki just blushed all over! AYEKA: But no one could tell this, since she is covered in fur. > >The End ALL: YAAAY!!! >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >--------- >It is a happy ending with a sad twist. PETER: No, it's a sad fan fic, with a twisted ending. >It is hard to tell how to feel? RANMA: Well, is it? >You decide. PRISS: No. >Was this funny, PRISS: No! >sad, PRISS: Yes. AYEKA: But not in the way YOU are thinking. >ect? ALL: Among other things. > >I hope you enjoyed this lemon. RANMA: No. >Strange as it is. RATCHET: That's an understatement. >Well I did complete >this in just 2 hours. AYEKA: It looks like it took less. >I still don't know why I made this, PETER: We have a couple of theories. PRISS: Mostly involving four letter words. >I just thought it was a cute lemon to make. ALL: No. >You be my judge. PETER & RATCHET(Endigomon/Kokomon): Go back . . . De-stroy . . . ALL(ditto, and giving the "OK" hand sign): It stinks! > >Write to me what you thing. RANMA: Your spelling sucks like a whirlpool. > >Tank Cop PRISS: May you get run over by a motorcycle gang! >^_~ ALL(old geezer): EVIL! (The MST group rushes out of the theater.) ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------- Group assessment to fan fiction author; PETER: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! RATCHET: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! PRISS: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! RANMA: WAZZZZZ UPPPPP! AYEKA: . . . . . . . . . I am NOT going to do that joke. End of research documentation. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ ---------- AUTHOR'S NOTES: I'm sure that Tank Cop must be pulling his hair out, about the new content filter. Oh, now isn't THAT a crying shame. ^_^ Okay, I've done more Tank Cop fics! I originally planned to include that "WAZ UP!" one with another MST, but that kind of fell through, so I just put it in font of the lemon one, and worked with it from there. Be sure to watch for me at the 2001 Anime EXPO, July 5-8 in Long Beach CA. I'll be dressed as myself (large green jacket, green belt- pack, and baggy army pants), and be at the fan-fiction meeting, if it's happening this year. Chances are, I'll be at next year's Anime EXPO as well. Also, watch for my OTHER Anime works appearing on www.fanfiction.net , as well! Until next MST, I am Peter Suzuki; Thank you, and goodnight! Peter Suzuki. EYECATCH: RATCHET(Nilly): WAAAAH! *poit!* *poit!*(Eyes pop out of her head, and into her lap.) WAAAAH!