Disclaimer: I do not own Tenchi Muyo! Ryo-ohki, Sailor Moon, Outlaw Star, or 
Final Fantasy VII. The only thing I do own is Earth Massacre, which isn't even 
in it's production stages yet. Anyway, this is the 2ND revision, which I hope to 
God you like...

Prologue (This might get a little crazy)

Late in the year A.D. 2009, Tokyo was invaded by Thrasher, Lucifer's second in 
command. It tooks vital efforts from Arch Angel St. Raphael, as well as three 
demon slayers to bring the raging beast down. Those Demon Slayers were Trell: 
CEO of Ultima Tech, Age: General of the ECTF (Earth Counter Terrorist Forces), 
and Trev: President of Ultima Tech. In the year A.D. 2010, It was discovered 
that God had an evil sibling. The Anti-God, just like our God, has given life to 
a Messiah, or in this case an Anti-Messiah. This Anti-Messiah was the one 
responsible to turning Lucifer to the side of evil, and Lucifer went mad when he 
found out. This caused Lucifer to request an alliance with the demon slayers to 
help rid the world of the Anti-Messiah. With that, current Grand Arch Angel St. 
Rapheal saw the goodness in Lucifer, and convinced God to let Lucifer rejoin the 
army of Heaven. With the valiant efforts of the Demon Slayers, St. Raphael, and 
St. Lucifer, the Anti-Messiah was stopped, and the Anti-God's plot was 
temperoarily ruined.It is now the year A.D. 2011, no more demons are living in 
this world, forcing the demon slayers to change their occupation. They are now 
Bounty Hunters!

Ultima Anime Massacre (v1.2)
Chapter  #1: "The New Wave of Evil"
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Written by the psychotic Ultima Trev


Trell: "What's taking Noc so long? It's been five minutes."

Trev: "Probably on a smoke break."

Trell: "So what are we doing?"

Trev: "I hear one of the strip clubs in town is being run by a mafia of space 
pirates."

Trell: "Did Age eavesdrop on the owner?"

Trev: "Yep, caught him red handed with a Kei Pirate by the name of Hazanko."

(Now the door opens...)

Noc: "I'm here, let's go!"

Trev: "Alright then."

Trell: "This is bitch ass cool, I can't wait to slay some pirates!."

(They head to the ground floor of the building, and waiting for them is Age.)

Age: "I thought you guys would never make it."

Noc: "My bad, I needed a smoke break."

(They exit the building getting into Trev's restored 1999 Toyata Supra Turbo-
R...)

Trell: "Blue?"

Age: "Red is a much better color for a car."

Trev: "Not in my mind."

Trell: "Blue is for wussies."

Trev: "Bah humbug!"

(Without futher ado, they get into the damn car. Trev turns the radio up to full 
blast.)

radio: "They think they know who I am!"

Trev: "So what's the name of the strip club?"

radio: "All I know is I love to kill!"

Age: "Tokyo Topless."

radio: "Face down, dead on the ground!"

Trev: "The most famous strip club in Tokyo? Holy shit."

radio: "Find me before another is found!"

Trell: "Coolness."

radio: "I come alive in the Darkness."

Trev: "I love this song."

radio: "Left murdered and nameless!"

(After a few minutes of Stripped, Strangled, and Raped, they reach their 
destination.)

Trev:  "It's massacre time gentlemen."

(They get out the car and enter the club.)

Host: "May I help you?"

(Trev draws the Holy Sword, Trell draws his Shotel, Age draws his Claymore, and 
Noc draws the Dragon Sword.)

Battle theme: "Decisive Battle" from the Neon Genesis Evangelion OST

Trev: "Sure, you can let us kill your boss!"

(Twelve of the bouncers discard their disguises and reveal the Kei Pirate 
uniforms.)

Age: "I call the combat armor."

Trell: "I call the BFG."

Trev: "Since when is this a Quake III deathmatch?"

"In the name of Sakuya, we shall kill you!"

Age: "Whatever."

(The four ex-demon slayers go on a hack and slash spree, flooding the club floor 
with blood and guts.)

club owner: (now unveiling his true identity) "Feel the wrath of Sakuya!"

(He summons an energy sword and charges the four head on, however Noc draws a 
daggar and sticks in his head.)

Trev: "This is too easy, but who is Sakuya?"

Age: "I think she's the Kei Pirate master, she's been thwarting to rule the 
universe because some Jurai prince dumped her."

(The Royal Palace of Planet Jurai, Tsunami is in the shower.)

Tsunami: "Tenchi dear , hurry up and get in here, I'm really horney and I need 
you to make love to me!"

Tenchi: "I'll be there in a second, I have to Veto some laws."

Tsunami: * This is so very, very hard on me. Life is now all work and no play. I 
need a vacation. *

(Five minutes pass and Tsunami is growing VERY impatient.)

Tsunami (Getting out of the shower and putting on a towel): "Where did he go?!"

(Tsunami has approached Tenchi's desk and found a note rather than her one true 
love.)

It reads:

Dear Empress of Jurai,

I have kidnapped your precious Tenchi. If you want him back, I suggest you hand 
over the Tsunami unit along with all of it's secrets and powers. Sincerly, 
Kagato.

(Silence fills the room for 10 seconds...)

Tsunami: "Aaaaahhh!!"

(Aeka and Ryouko rush to the Empress. Because they were dressed in Leather 
Dominatrix uniforms, it was obvious they  were on another lesian sexcapade.)

Aeka: "What seems to be the matter?"

(While Tsunami starts to cry she hands her sister the letter)

Aeka: "Tenchi's been kidnapped!"

Ryouko: "Crap."

Tsunami: (crying) "What can we do!"

Aeka: "Tsunami, can't you track Soujia's singnal."

Tsunami: "Right!" (Yet another moment of silence) "Ah-ha! They are heading for 
Tokyo, Japan."

Ryouko: "Ryo-ohki!"

Ryo-ohki: "Meow?"

Ryouko: "Set a course for Earth."

Ryo-ohki: "Meow-meow!"

(Back to the executive office of Ultima Tech HQ-#1)

Trev: (yawn) "Oh God this is boring."
Trell: "We own the place, let's take a vacation."
Trev: "Great idea!"

(Trev and Trell make their way out of the buiding)

Noc: "Going home early are we?"

Trev: "No, we're just taking a long over due vacation."

Noc: "Holy shit, wait up!"

Trev: "Maybe we could convice Age to take a vacation from the ECTF."

Trell: "I doubt it, he seems too tied to his work."

Trev: "Probably right."

(Later at Trev's Estate, the vacationeers are having a refreshing DooM IV Death 
match. Trev and Trell are scarfing junk food and colas, while Noc is scarfing 
beer and smokes)

Trev: "I'm gonna go outside, this smoke makes me nautious."

(Once outside, Trev sees a falling object fast approaching.)

Trev: "What the Hell is this?"

(Soujia comes down for a landing.)

Trev: "Could these be more space pirate fiends?"

(Trev walks around the massive ship to observe what it is.)

Trev: "I've never seen a pirate ship like this before."

(The hatch opens, and Kagato steps out of the ship.)

Kagato: "Well, it looks like I've scared the locals."

Trev: "Not really, we get visitors all the time. Are you a space pirate by any 
chance?"

Kagato: "I suppose I am, why do you care?"

Trev emits a grin. "Because my secondary occupation is bounty hunting."

"Well, aren't you special."

"I guess not, killing low life pirates is much too easy."

Kagato then shows his teeth in anger. "You certainly are cocky, I'll enjoy 
killing you."

Trev looks up. (gulp!)

Kagato smiles. "That's right, you should be scared."

"It's not that..."

Kagato: "What is it?"

"There's a ship heading right for us."

(Ryo-ohki is off balance, and is coming in for a crash landing.)

Kagato: "You fool, you really think I'm going to fall for that?"

Trev: "Suit yourself..."

SPLAT!! Ryo-ohki crushes Kagato.

"Poor guy, his own arrogance got him killed."

Next, three young ladies phase from out of nowhere.

* Shit, I better run. * Since Trev is shy around woman, especially the ones he 
doesn't know, he runs home like mad.

"The locals are afraid of anything nowadays." Aeka says with a sweat drop.

Trev runs and runs until he his at the humble place he calls home. "I don't 
think those pirate witches will have the nerve to enter my domain." Trev then 
proceeds through the front door.

"Trev, it looks you're having a heart attack."

Trev: "Well, I was running from these three pirate witches..."

"Pirates?"

"I think so."

"Let's massacre 'em!"

Trell and Noc dash for their swords and look to find these misidenitied ladies. 
The three women from Jurai were about to board Soujia, but they stop to turn 
around because it sounds like a pack of wild animals is fast approaching. In 
reality, it's really the slaughter driven Trell and Noc who are eager to tear 
apart some space pirate trash.

"Alright you pirate witches, which one of you wants to die first?"

Ryouko is up to the test. "I'll take care of these goons, you go fins Tenchi."

Tsunami and Aeka abide and Ryouko starts off ky charging up a ki blast.

Trell smirks. "Her power is pretty good for a space pirate."

Noc grins. "No way, I was more powerful as an infant."

Ryouko is annoyed. "Hey, you're making me mad." She then unleashes the ki 
attack.

The blast charges forth at great speed, but Noc and Trell's are able to shield 
the attack effortlessly.

"This isn't good, I thought they were normal humans."

"Yo, we are the best bounty hunters in this damn universe. No witch can harm 
us!"

Trev then approaches the scene. "Congrats, she's petrified because she sensed 
your true power. Looks like we triumph again."

Trell then laughs. "Never send Trev to do a man's job."

Noc joins in on the fun. "Yeah, only Trev would be afraid of femal pirates."

"Not this again..."

"By the way, which one of us should deliver the final blow?"

"Since she's petrified, we might as well hand her into the ECTF."

"That's sounds pretty boring Trev. I think we should just kill her."

Ryouko forms a sweat drop. * Who the Hell are these guys? *

Trev then gets upset, and when Trev gets upset, PEOPLE DIE!! "Oh crap, the PMS, 
it's that time of the month!" (Not the kind of PMS you're thinking of)

Noc is flustered. "THE PSYCHOTIC MURDER SYNDROME?!!"

"Trev, you must fight it. Last time you destroyed the neighboring star system!"

Trev eyes turn red. "I can't, it's already here!"

Trev then calls forth massive ki, the Earth shakes violently. In a matter of 
seconds, Trev goes Turbo Ultima.

"Now you will all face the horror of the PMS!!"

"Noc, on the count of three. One... Two... Three..."

"Omega Ultima Flash!!"

Two huge ki blast rage towards Trev's position, and they emit a sub nuclear 
explosion. The explosion was so powerful it even sent the Soujia flying into the 
air. Luckily the Soujia is well plated, so the heroines inside are safe. When 
the smoke subsides, Trev is still standing strong, unphased by the blast.

"You idiots, your power is nothing compared to the PMS!!"

End of Chapter #1. Can Noc and Trell defeat Trev and his vicious PMS? Will the 
help of the Jurai Royal Family do any good? Find out next time...