Shinji The 10 o'Clock Assassin http://members.xoom.com/Shinji_2200/KNSImpact.htm tyree3@pacbell.net This fanfic contains sex and harsh language. Viewer's discretion is strongly advised. If not; then you can go watch the Disney Channel for all I care. ************ The next day, at the Society for the Prevention of the Use of Underaged Anime Girls for Lemons... Shinji: But I made these girls over 18 years of age! WHAT PART OF "OVER 18 DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND??!!" Clerk: Oh, the parts where you include incest. Shinji: Oh, excuse me. "Super Taboo" is a sex manga brought to the US by Eros Comix, and it became one of the top selling comics here. It had incest pouring out of it's pages! Clerk: I see... Shinji: I'm also a writer of a bunch of Eva lemons! Why didn't you attack me then?! Clerk: Because it was the creator's fault. Shinji: And why is it that I'd get kicked in the groin for doing lemons like these; and yet everyone else is making, AND COLLECTING MIND YOU, hentai pics of Sasami, Ruri, Skuld, and...! OH LOOK!! IS THAT A NAKED CHIBI- USA UP THERE??!! Clerk: THAT IS ENOUGH!! 10 o'Clock, I'll have you know that we're keeping a very sharp eye on you for now on! We refuse to put up with more of your mindless fuck-a-minute fuck-a-thons! And don't think we can't do anything to you. We have the technology. Shinji: (Sneering.) I see... And hey! Clerk: What is it? Shinji: #1: Puff Daddy is still number one on the rap charts. #2: South Park is making a killing on cable. #3: End of Evangelion is still being praised as the number one movie for five years. And #4: Pokemon is one gigantic "chicken- fight," and yet children all over the US are trying to "catch them all." Explain to me why is that? But the clerk didn't listen to him. He's currently hearing the latest Puff Daddy jam. His desk is filled with paraphernalia from South Park and Pokeman. And his computer screen has a screen saver that replays the dreaded "mastubation scene" from the End of Eva. Gee, that explains everything! That night, the 10 o'Clock Assassin is in front of his computer trying to figure out a way to clean up his most MST'ed fiction to date. Shinji: Okay, let's see... Removes sex scenes with Achika and Mayuka... Huff... Probably remove the Tsunami and Mitsuki sex scene as well... ************ 10-CHI RETURNS or BECAUSE I LOVE TENCHI MUYO ************ It's morning at the Masaki household. The sun shines through the window, causing Tenchi to wake up before his alarm goes off. He opens his eyes and tries to focus them. He then rolls over to find... Ryoko's smooth body right next to him. He also finds out that she's very, VERY unclad. Ryoko: (Smiling) Good morning, Tenchi. Now Tenchi; already groggy from a year of sex, sex, and more sex; goes automatic. He kisses Ryoko in the mouth and soon slams his cock into the wiley alien. On the other end, she's pretty amazed at the fact that it's been over one Earth year now, and he's still at his peak performance. Whatever Washuu had sneaked into his food that day must've done wonders for his sexual drive. After a while Ryoko explodes under the power of his cock before Tenchi shoots his seed and empties himself into his first alien "friend." He then takes some clean clothes and leaves the room wondering why he isn't so groggy from all that vaginal muscular pressure on his cock. -=**=- (It's a scene change.) He goes into the nearest bathroom, but the door's locked. Tenchi was just about to pout when the door suddenly opens from the inside. It's Princess Aeka, wearing only her bathrobe. Both of them are surprised at first, but she greets her lover (and great^? grand-nephew?) with a weak smile. Aeka: Oh. My apologies, Lord Tenchi. The other washroom is still in repairs (from me and Ryoko fighting over you). Your father said it was okay to use this one right here. Tenchi: My apologies, your highness. But I really have to use the restroom now. He tries to go in, but the princess is still in his way. Aeka: If and only if... You allow me to join you. Obviously, the attempt to avoid her majesty this morning is an utter failure. And so, he goes in as her highness closes the door behind him and locks it. And so, after what seemed like the longest piss ever, Tenchi soon felt like the weight of the world had fell off his shoulders. He then finds the weight of Princess Aeka on his shoulders as she wipes some of the piss (as well as the stench of Ryoko's "baggy pussy") from his cock with a washcloth. She then positions herself against the door which Tenchi wanted to go out through. Aeka: Now now, Lord Tenchi. There's only one way out. Poor Tenchi had no choice but to pleasure her highness. He kisses her in the mouth as he plays with her small breasts and cunt. She returns the favor by massaging his massive hard-on; being careful not to let it explode before it's proper use. Tenchi then lifts up her left leg as he slides his cock into her. The thing to note is that he really doesn't like putting his cock into her highness because she's SO FUCKING TIGHT!!! The fact that she has the flattest chest instantly gives away her secret. And it's always the same: He hammers it in, he EXPLODES and empties himself into her... Aeka: Tenchi! You done it again! You came and didn't give me the chance to come with you! HOW DARE YOU!!! And next comes the apologizing, the butt-kissing, and ultimately the pussy-licking. Not that licking her highness's soft fleshy petals is anything bad, mind you. But she had the sex-drive of an 18-wheeler; meaning that it will take him about an hour or two to get her off using his tongue, fingers, and unreliable cock. -=**=- (Kohran from Sakura Wars after an explosion.) Tenchi then heads downstairs... (Aw, fuck it.) And decides to pay a little visit to Washuu's laboratory; hoping that she isn't doing anything weird this morning. Washuuu: Well, good morning my dear Tenchi. Would you like to take part in one of my experiments today? Tenchi: No thanks. I just came here to slam my cock into your pussy so hard; your title of "Universe's Greatest Scientist" will be reduced to "Fourth Greatest." Nothing more. Washuuuu: Oh, that's a mean thing to say about me. And I had something special cooked up for you, today. Tenchi: (Shakes his head violently...) Hey! What is it with all these "u's" after your name? Washuuuuu: I'm not sure. People were complaining about the proper way my name was spelt... Author takes break to check Japanese dictionary, taking a note that the name of the greatest scientist in the solar system means "Eagle Feathers:" Washi = Eagle Yuu = Does One's Hair Washiyuu... Wasyuu... Washuu... Washu... Oh, I see! Goujira... Godzilla! Tenchi: Forget this! Can we screw now, MS. WASHUU? Washuu: Not today, unfortunately. My real body's currently in the chamber for a centurial prognosis and the only spare body I have on stock had no vagina. So... Second point down. Ms. Washuu IS doing something weird. But his grief soon turns into estacy (albeit a sick one) as the small prodigy takes his cock out and does amazing things to it with her tongue and hands. [ADVERTISEMENT] And now, you too can own the highly controversial Universal Kama Sutra! Only $24.95! WHAT A BARGAIN!! Available RIGHT NOW at your local Tower and Virgin CD/Video/Book Store! GET IT TODAY!! [END ADVERTISEMENT] Tenchi totally loses it as he shoots his seed into the red-haired scientist's mouth. But she's unable to swallow it all and has to contend with having his white, gooey sperm splurt all over her cute face and hair. (Shut up! Or do you want me to put Sasami in this as well?) Washuu: See? Almost as good as the real thing, huh? At this point, poor Tenchi couldn't decide whether to facevault or go-hard again... -=**=- (Shermie after being caught in her own "spiral.") Despite this morning's "cock-shootings," Tenchi manages to have some breakfast and is currently on his way towards Tokyo University. He nearly passes the Miho-Kiyo apartment along the way before his mind starts to click again. Tenchi: Oh, what the hell. Might as well do something for the Miho- Kiyo fans. He goes up to the door of said apartment and knocks on it... After a couple seconds the door opens to reveal the lovely "Teal-Dressed Goddess" Kiyone; sporting the luxurious swim suit she wore during the "Mugen Tenchi Muyo" lemon sidestory. Kiyone: Oh. Hi, Tenchi. Mihoshi: ALRIGHT!! IT'S TENCHI!! COME ON IN!! And he does so, looking towards Kiyone who's silently insulting the bronzed bubblehead. Not wanting this to turn into another bad Miho-Kiyo fiasco, Tenchi comes around her back and kisses the cheek of the goddess with the red headband. He then looks toward Mihoshi who's wearing the same style swimsuit, only with less material on it. Tenchi's cock grew to fuller than full mast when he caught the mere glimpse of the lovely Mihoshi. But he saw Kiyone first so... He asks the goddess who was at the now-closed doorway if she didn't mind being boinked by him. And an answer had already been given when she unzipped his fly and removed the bulge from his pants. She licks away at his member, and in no time flat his seed was already flying from his cockpiece and onto the lovely Kiyone. She then takes his shrinking member and slithers it into her wet and waiting pussy, causing him to go hard once more. [Tenchi notes again that whatever Washuu gave him had really done some wonders for him. His refraction time has been cut very short.] He takes her by the waist and slams his cock into her, watching in awe and amazement as Mihoshi licks all of his come off Kiyone's face, hair, and breasts. And added to the immense pleasure is the loud moaning and torrent of lady- cum caused by his love for her and his large cock. Far from being through, he then takes Mihoshi by her cute bottom and slowly slides his cock into her as he plays with her large breasts. It feels so good as he continuously slides his member in and out of her, causing the lucky GP officer to moan even louder than Kiyone had. Speaking of Kiyone, she's now between the legs of her love and roommate; adding more pleasure to them with her expertice in tongue- fu. Mihoshi soon loses her control and another torrent of lady-cum is caused; falling all over Kiyone's face. Tenchi then exits her canal, rolls her over, and sprays his semen all over the bronzed blonde's face and breasts; which were still bouncing about from Kiyone's hand playing with her roommate's still-sensitive pussy. Tenchi then looks at the clock... He's got an hour before his class actually starts! This guy has to go! But not before giving the lovely Miho-Kiyo duo a deep kiss goodbye to each. -=**=- (Hideaki Anno after meeting some really pissed-off fans of Eva. With MALLETS!) My language is harsh! And coarse like the sands of time! And you will be struck! STRUCK!! With a tidal wave of words!" Tenchi's in his History 5 class watching a film about the Reformation, where Martin Luther and his followers take a stand against the spoiling of religion. "Well, that's what happens when you leave it out in the open for too long!" jokes one classmate who's seen way too many "Cash Money Records" videos. After said class Tenchi's about to leave when he hears a certain, yet soothing, voice... Sakuya: Good afternoon, Ten-chan. Tenchi: Uhh... Hi, Sakuya. How are you doing? Sakuya: I'm doing fine! Hey, ain't that Mr. Fujisawa so cool? Tenchi: Yeah, he is cool. But I'm thinking about dropping the class. Sakuya: Huh? How come? Tenchi: Well... I've been too busy. On top of my other two classes I got... (A hard-on in my pants again!) Some other projects to deal with. Sakuya: Well, I'm so sorry to hear that, Ten- chanyouain'thidin'thatcockfromme. Hey! How about we go someplacesoyoucanboinkmewiththatlargecockofyours and get a soda? And by this point, Tenchi knew exactly what she's been saying. He takes her to the nearest janitorial room which is not being used. And as soon as he closed the door, Sakuya was already sliding along side him in eagerness. He lifts her left leg, going under her ravishingly short skirt, and pushes aside her frilly underwear to lick at her soft, moistening pussy. His tongue massages the girl's dampening entrance, causing her to moan loudly. "Thank God for soundproofing," he thought as he causes her dam to break after a while. Tenchi then takes his cock out and somehow manages to slide it into her. Sakuya cries in sheer pain, noticing out much larger he's become sence she was last done by him. Overdriven by lust, Tenchi starts drilling a deeper hole into his latest girlfriend as he slams his salami into her. Sakuya has been sent past the "point of no return." And Tenchi blows yet another load into yet another beautiful girl today. And OH DOES THAT FEEL SO GOOD!!! The janitor who had caught them leaving, on the other hand, did not find it so pleasing... Janitor: Goddamn you kids! That's the fifth time you used that place in about a month now!! -=**=- (A crab with no claws.) Later on, Nagi is outside the Masaki Shrine trying to figure out a way to capture the (former) space pirate Ryoko without causing some unneeded reaction from the other residence: Aeka will have a fit ("She's mine! Nobody gets revenge on her except for me!"), Sasami will cry for centuries, the two spacecops won't like it one bit, Washuu will try to blow the world up, and Tenchi will actually cause his hidden power to come out of hiding. Nagi: Damn you, Ryoko. You're just too comfortable within the safety of this household. Just how long are you planning to hide in there? She soon notices Tenchi coming from down the street. He then catches a glimpse of her, thinking it's Ryoko wanting to have another sexual discussion with him and marched straight towards her to put an end to it. But as he gets closer, he soon recognizes her as the "intergalactic bounty hunter," and decided that maybe he should go the other way... Nagi: Tenchi Masaki! (Stopping him in his tracks with her words.) Ryoko is a coward not to challenge me one-on-one. Are you a coward as well? Tenchi: Look. I don't wanna have sex with you. I'm already sore from doing six women as of today. Nagi: And will it hurt you to do one more, Masaki? Or am I just too hideous to be even considered worthy of your mighty salami? Come to think of it... Nagi can be quite attractive when she wants; despite the freakish hairstyle and the large revenge streak. She has the three sizes that are somewhere between Kiyone and Mihoshi, and she should be checked out during the episode where the "bathing suit contest" was held. Tenchi soon has Nagi in his room. Nagi: I'll be just a mere doll to you. Do with me whatever you like. Tenchi: No way, Nagi. I like for you to participate in this as well. And with that said, causing the hard-boiled bounty hunter to sigh heavily, she removes her firm-fitting battlesuit with the flick of her wrist. She lays on his bed and spreads herself wide so he can get a majestic view of her. But what caught his attention more was the many scars the bounty hunter picked up whilst on the job. Tenchi: Oh my! You got a scar there as well?! Nagi can only give out a weak sneer(?) as Tenchi goes in and licks at her only softspot. After she moistens a bit, she tells him to get on the bed with him. He does as he's told as Nagi removes the enlarged member once more and goes down on it like nobody's business. The two soon placed themselves into a 69 position. And sometime later, Tenchi's face is covered with bounty-hunter-lady-cum while Nagi makes him blow his load all the way down her throat; an amazing feat for someone who already has a cock halfway down her throat. And after shooting a large load of cum, it's still hard. Nagi then positions herself over a zonked-out Tenchi; who she immediately wakes up. Nagi: It's not sleepytime yet, Tenchi my dear. You still have a job to perform. She then slides his throbbing member into her... AND OH GOD SHE'S SO TIGHT!!! Well... Not as tight as Sakuya... Aeka's the tightest... But Nagi is about SO FUCKING TIGHT that he would've exploded into her instantly... Had it not been for her womanhood clamping around the base of his cock; unabling him to come at that instant. Tenchi: You seem to have had some experience in this before... Nagi: It's an alien thing, baby. "Predator," "Star Trek & Star Wars;" they ain't got nothing on the rest of us! Tenchi: But it isn't fair. I want to explode right now if you don't mind. This causes another sigh from the bounty hunter as she lets him exit her supernatural cunt... But not all the way out. She only keeps the head of his cock in; massaging his meat as fast as she can. This sends the poor guy into supernova as he empties himself once again into the wiley semi-villain's sexual entrance. After said second blast, he falls onto her body exhausted from all the sex with ladies from another planet. And Nagi soon has his head along her breasts, so he can lick at and around the nipples, before falling prey to the attack of the "slumber fairy." -=**=- (Two punks on the floor searching for the small meth pills, but are unsuccessful because they're already high. So they end up hitting each other in the heads and therefore caused brain damage onto themselves.) And this is why a guy like him should never have weeks off... Ever! The next morning Tenchi meets up with the ladies in the living room. It's about time to reset the "Weekly Schedule." So he takes the folded-up pieces of paper and places them in his father's hat. He shakes the hat up ("No cheating, Ryoko." "Alright, alright!") and gives each of the pieces of paper to the ladies. The schedule will be as follows... Sunday=Mihoshi (YAY!!) Monday=Sakuya (Alright!) Tuesday=Aeka (I shall prepare something extra special for you, Lord Tenchi.) Wednesday=Ryoko (I'll see you, princess. And then I'll raise it!) Thursday=Nagi (Hmph. Haven't won yet.) Friday=Kiyone (It's kinda sad, really...) Saturday=Washuu (My real body should be ready by then.) One thing will be for sure, though: Whatever Washuu had placed into his food that night... It's gonna be in his strict nutritional plan if he ever wants to see another decade. ~_~; THE END The Tenchi gang are at the movie theatre; watching the last part of the film run its course... Tenchi: So, girls. What do you think? Ryoko: He took out the parts about Mayuka and Achika. Everyone was complaining about that. Aeka: Hmph! I'd rather have his own mother touch him instead of you! Ryoko: Oh yeah! And don't tell me that you don't wanna touch him either, you shrew! Aeka: YOU TAKE THAT BACK!! Another Ryoko Vs. Aeka fight ensues until Washuu hits the both of them with her prized "zapping laser invention thingy." Kiyone: I'm actually surprised that the 10 o'Clock would go back and clean up this piece of garbage. Mihoshi: Why are you being so mean? We get to have sex with Tenchi! (Giggles.) Kiyone: Well, I wanted to have sex with him alone. The whole romance thing gets ruined when you're around me. Mihoshi: That's not true, Kiyone! You and I are great together! Kiyone: No, YOU're great together. I'm better alone with Tenchi. Sakuya: So, you're an intergalactic bounty hunter. Nagi's your name? Nagi: Yes. And you must be Sakuya; "Tenchi's latest girlfriend" from Shin Tenchi Muyo. Sakuya: Correct! They take a moment to stare at each other... Nagi: Your behavior spooks me, kid. Sakuya: And you look like you should be in a band or something... The gang then exit the theatre deciding on whether to hurt the author some more or actually "thank" him when they suddenly find another large group of movie-goers exiting the theatre nextdoor... Throwing up, or trying to make it to the restroom so they can throw up there. Tenchi: (Grabbing one person.) Are you alright?! Person: No I'm not...! Kiyone: What's wrong? Is it the movie you just saw? But the person was unable to speak due to some of his food exiting the way it came in. All he could manage to do was point at the names of the movie over the door. Needless to say, the Tenchi gang was shocked. FRIDAY GROSS OUT DOUBLE FEATURE: "POT" W/ "TENCHI ON A PLATE OF SASHIMI" AUTHOR'S RAMBLINGS: I like to thank everybody who's said that my "10-Chi Clan: The Quickies" lemon fanfic was bad-bad-BAD!! I'm surprised on how intolerant you people are out there in the web world. In fact, I didn't want to go back and fix this fic. I wanted it to be a cornerstone of a fic that I should never do. But then I read (or tried to read) lemons from all the other authors out there. And I must ask: Where is the line drawn between "fuck-a-minute fuck-a-thons" and "Tentacle demon does everything that walks while getting high on crack and vomiting all over the place?" Tenchi Muyo belongs to AIC/Pioneer. Everything else belongs to their respected creators. And remember: The 10 o'Clock Assassin isn't really a bad shot. I just have multiple targets to shoot. There's a difference! ^_^